by Kate Gilead
“Why didn’t you call earlier, when you first found out? I would’ve answered the phone if you’d called earlier.”
“Because I was afraid you’d say I couldn’t come!” She puts her head into her hands and sobs. I put an arm around her and try to support her. “But…but…then I felt bad and tried to call you anyway…and you didn’t answer!”
Geez! I feel so bad for her!
“Aww! No, you shouldn’t be alone at a time like this,” I say. I look over at Rob, helplessly.
“True,” he sighs. “I guess it’s okay, Valeriss. You can stay here tonight. ” The reluctance is heavy in his voice. “But something sounds weird about your funds being frozen. Even if he has authority to, why would Tanner freeze your accounts? Maybe it’s a probate thing.”
She shakes her head. “I wouldn’t know.”
Rob sighs. “No, I guess you wouldn’t. Well, it’s a long drive from D.C.. You must be exhausted. Did you bring any clothes?”
She nods, wipes her eyes and sips her tea. “A couple bags. They’re in the car.” She sobs again. “Daddy was all I had,” she wails, miserably.
“There, there,” I whisper, patting and rubbing her back. Poor thing!
“That’s not exactly true. Your mother has family in Europe,” Rob says.
“Yes but you know they disowned her when she married Daddy,” she says, tears starting to flow again. She looks at me. “She died when I was a baby and they didn’t even come to the funeral!” She puts her head in her hands and sobs.
“That was long ago. Things changed, you know that. We met some of your cousins and your grandmother in London when we went, that one summer. They loved you. And I know you’re in touch on Facebook because I’ve seen some of their photos and posts.”
“Yeah, a little on Facebook. We’ve emailed a few times. Not that much. It’s not like I can just go live with them, Robbie. I don’t know them that well.”
“You can’t live here, either, Valeriss,” he says. “You know that, right?”
She nods, sobbing.
My heart breaks for her. Not knowing what else to do, I keep patting her, comforting her. “I’m so sorry. I…I wish I knew what to do. Losing your father is terrible. I’m so sorry!” She blows her nose and rests her head on my shoulder for a moment, so nakedly vulnerable that it brings tears to my eyes.
I rock her a little bit, unable to think of anything else to say.
“Yes. I’m truly sorry, Valeriss.” Rob says again.
She nods. “Thank you, Robbie. Thank-you Brenda. I really appreciate your help and support.”
“You’re welcome. But, you’ll have to go back to D.C. sooner or later,” Rob says.
“I know,” she says. “But I need to talk to Tanner first. I need to…” she trails off, looking around absently, her exhaustion evident. She pauses to blow her nose again. “I’m sorry about Meff. I didn’t mean those things I said about him. I just…I can’t deal with him right now. You…you know what I mean.”
“Yes, Valeriss. I do,” Rob says, his voice tired but not unkind.
Chapter Thirteen
Brenda
Soon after we finish our tea, I get ready to leave. We’re not happy that our night is ending with me going home instead of falling asleep in each other’s arms, but Valeriss’ arrival has changed everything.
He walks me out to the car. Sitting by the curb is a late-model, lime green Volkswagen Beetle.
“Is that Valeriss’ car?”
“Yes. No wonder the dog drove her nuts, driving all the way down here in that little thing.”
I get into my car. Rob climbs into the passenger seat to say goodnight.
“Rob…? How close are you with Valeriss?”
He turns his whole body in the seat to look me in the eye. “We’re friends. That’s all, that’s all it’s been since before we even got divorced.”
“Why did you get divorced? What happened? I mean, didn’t you love each other?”
“No. Well, yes, in a way, but…not the way we needed to, or should have. The marriage wasn’t…it wasn’t what I’d even call a legitimate marriage. Legal, but not real. We were so young…neither of us knew anything. I…we…it’s complicated.” He sighs, rubbing his chin. “It’s hard to explain in two minutes.” He gestures towards the house. “I didn’t expect…this. I thought we’d have more time to get to know each other before having to…discuss a past that doesn’t matter anymore.”
“Okay. Well, it seems like she does matter, that’s all.” Even as I’m saying it, my heart is telling me to believe him. To wait, and see. Obviously there’s more to the story, but my spidey-sense is still saying, this is a good guy.
Whatever happened, something is telling me that he’s not doing anything wrong.
But, is that spider-sense real? Is it some kind of women’s intuition…or is it just wishful thinking?
“Is she, uh, do you know if she’s under a doctor’s care?” I ask.
He laughs humorlessly. “You mean, a shrink? I don’t know about now, but she has been, in the past. Believe me, I know how it looks, but as far as I know, there was never any diagnosis. There’s no, ah, clinically significant mental illness or personality disorder. As best as I can tell, she’s just…spoiled.”
I raise an eyebrow but say nothing.
He shakes his head, purses his lips, and then rubs his face with both hands. Poor guy!
Then, he takes my hand and kisses it. “She means well, she’s a decent person. And she can be a very good friend to have…in her own way.” He pauses. “How can I explain this? She…she’s passive, yet stubborn. Irresponsible, and…yeah. Well, you saw. Childlike. Immature.” He sighs. “Daddy never wanted his little girl to grow up. So, I guess she didn’t.”
“Can I ask…is she…is her family wealthy or something? The way she was talking about her ‘funds’. Not that it’s my business. I’m just wondering.”
“Yes, very wealthy. Her father is Valerian DeVolt. A cut-throat D.C. lobbyist. Or, was.”
“Oh?”
“Yes. He was known in D.C. but you’ve likely never heard of him. Very rich. Valeriss is his only child. His namesake, his world…his everything.” He shakes his head. “You can see how well that worked out.”
“Poor little rich girl,” I muse out loud. “Well, money isn’t everything.” I look into those beautiful eyes of his. They’re fixed on me, full of distress.
And I’m feeling it, too. This doesn’t bode well for our budding relationship. I think about Amanda’s words about having sex with a man too early after meeting and my stomach sinks.
She was worried about disrespect. But that’s not the problem here. The problem is, have I trusted a man whom I don’t really know…someone who’s not really free from his past?
I can’t change what just happened between us. I don’t want to. But only time will tell what happens next.
“There’s nothing between Valeriss and me,” he says, looking at me steadily. “We’ve just stayed friends. Friendly. She’s a pain in the ass, and I know I’m going to regret having her here. But, I promise you, Brenda, that there’s nothing between us.”
He leans over and takes me in his arms. His kiss, and the way he holds me and is trying to reassure me, sure seems genuine. What we just did together was certainly genuine.
“Are you okay?” he whispers.
“Yes. It’s good of you to take her in,” I say. “I hope she gets everything straightened out soon.”
“I hope so too. Damn!” He lets out a heavy breath. “I do not want to deal with her. Work is about to get really intense. We have that big project due before the first of February. I’m working late the rest of this month. This is a really bad time for this.”
“I’m sorry, sweetie,” I say. But that’s all I can say. We kiss goodnight and I leave, worried and unhappy.
For the next two weeks, it’s tough to talk or text, and impossible to meet up or hang out.
Rob and his team of co-workers are on twelve h
our days, with Rob getting home after eight o’clock at night.
At least that’s understandable. Work is work, one of those things we all have to deal with.
The bigger and more bizarre problem, is the fact that Valeriss is still there, with no end to her stay in sight.
She’s too distraught to leave alone, but Rob has to be in bed early for work. Before he goes to sleep, he calls me to say goodnight from his bedroom. We talk briefly and he reports basically the same thing: Still no word from this lawyer, Tanner. No word about her funds, or her father’s estate, or when she’s going back to D.C..
He’s wondering if something fishy is going on there but isn’t sure what to do about it. Or, if there’s anything he can do it about it.
Furthermore, she’s grieving, sleeping a lot and crying when she’s awake. He doesn’t feel right about pressuring her too much. Or, making her leave. And, truly, what kind of person would throw a bereaved orphan out, to grieve alone …even if the orphan is thirty-three years old.
He hangs out with her the first full weekend she’s there, but during the week, he has to leave her alone.
And that’s when the causes the worst of the chaos.
By the next weekend, when he calls me from his bedroom, the tension is his voice is thick. He tells me that he dreads getting home now, afraid of what he’ll find.
The house is a mess from Valeriss’ sloppy habits and what she calls ‘ongoing disagreements’ between Tiny and Meff. She won’t keep them separate because she thinks they need to learn to get along. Rob thinks that they fight because Meff keeps challenging Tiny for leadership when Rob isn’t there, since there’s no leadership coming from Valeriss.
“She’s already wrecked my stove,” Rob’s saying, gritting his teeth. “She ruined a pot and a burner, trying to make porridge from scratch. ” Heavy sigh. “The main bathroom and the bedroom she’s using look like a hurricane went through them. God, she’s such a slob!”
“Holy cow,” I say. “Really? This is surreal.”
“It’s exactly like it was when we were married,” he says. “Nothing’s changed. It’s like she has this…helplessness. Yet there’s nothing wrong with her. I mean, she shouldn’t be helpless. It’s learned or something. And, you’d think it’s deliberate, which’d make her evil, wouldn’t it? A bad person. But, she’s not. She’s kind and decent, educated. She’s actually an amazing intellectual…sometimes. She’s just…impossible to deal with, in many ways. You can’t hate her, but you can’t stand her, either.”
He sounds beside himself. “I’m sorry, sweetie. It sounds like she has problems, no question.”
“Yes. Listen. I’ve been thinking…let’s meet in the dog park after work on Friday,” he says. “I’m going to go to work two hours early and leave at six instead of eight o’clock.” He pauses. “I hate leaving her in the house alone for a second longer than I have to, but…this has gone on long enough. I need to see you. I need to talk to you.”
“I want to see you, too.”
We make arrangements to meet and hang up. I stare up at the ceiling, suffering a case of romantic heebie-jeebies.
I feel like I should be on cloud nine because of meeting Rob. We should be hanging out regularly and getting to know each other.
But now, it’s almost the opposite. I feel really bad for Valeriss’ loss but I can’t help but resent her, just the same. It’s not her fault that her father passed away, but her arrival has tarnished what should be a shiny, new romance.
I could really use someone to talk to about this, but I shudder at the thought of trying to explain this to anyone in the family.
I’m pretty sure they’d tell me to just forget about him. That I don’t know him well enough; that he’s still too involved with his ex; that his life is too complicated and messy for me.
Amanda’s been busy too and I haven’t heard from her. And I’d have avoided her probably, if I had. I wish I could just tell her everything!
And if she should she ask if I’ve slept with him, I’m dreading telling her the truth.
I know she’d say it was a bad idea. And, what if she’s right and my intuition is wrong? What if to him, I’m just a dumb girl who’s made herself too available to a guy she barely knows?
Of course, the next week drags as if it’s never going to end. We text regularly and talk briefly in the interim, which reassures me, even if the situation at his house doesn’t.
Friday finally comes and I get through my work day. Rob texts at six-thirty to tell me he’s heading out.
Yay, thank God! I check my look and try to calm my butterflies. Finally gonna see my new beau again!
I get the dogs into the car and head out a few minutes later.
I pull into the parking lot and there’s the Jeep. I see Rob sitting in the driver’s seat, his head swiveling to watch me park. Tiny is in the passenger seat, and his head turns to watch as well.
Getting out of my car, I turn to see Rob practically jumping out of the Jeep. He hurries towards me. The sight makes my heart leap with joy and all my doubts fly away as if they were never there. I can’t keep the smile off my face and his own wide, white smile and one adorable dimple show me how happy he is to see me, too.
He grabs me and lifts me right off my feet, hugging me so tightly I can’t breathe.
“Mmmm oh yeah….there’s my girl,” he says, tucking his face into my neck and rocking me, my feet dangling off the ground. We kiss, making silly noises, mwah mwah mwah, and then he play-gobbles my nose. We both giggle like lunatics. A woman taking a beagle out of the car looks over and smiles. We probably look like we haven’t seen each other for years.
“I missed you so much, it’s crazy! Jesus!” He puts me down with a final squeeze and we get the dogs out. Tiny and Diesel immediately start a game of bitey-face, eyes rolling and huffing dog-laughter. It’s like they missed each other too.
Rob and I start down the winding path, holding hands. I only let go long enough to let Princess out of her carrier.
As soon as I set her on the ground, all three of them go nuts, play-bowing and galumphing around like furry goofballs.
“Look how happy they are to see each other,” Rob says.
“Not as happy as me,” I say, holding his arm between both of mine and staying as close to him as I can.
We let the dogs exercise and play and do their ‘peeps and poops’. Following Rob’s advice about being relaxed myself when Princess is around bigger dogs has paid off. She’s well-behaved and mannerly now, looking to me for leadership cues.
Seeing this progress makes my own anxiety about her safety fade. I’ll always have to keep an eye out for her but I think I can trust her not to start problems on her own now.
As for Rob…we can’t keep our hands off of each other. His affection feels wonderful, familiar, and right. Between chatter about everything––except Valeriss––we hold hands, hug, kiss, walk arm-in-arm and steal long, sexy kisses when no-one’s around.
After a pleasant hour in the park, we start heading back.
‘So, you said your parents are coming home for a visit soon? Any idea when, sweetie?” he asks. Stopping near the parking lot, we take a seat on a bench and leash Tiny and Diesel. I scoop up Princess and put her in her carrier.
“I think Mom said Monday. Dad has tax meetings after the first of the month or something.
“You looking forward to seeing them?”
“Yes! It’s nice to have the house to myself, but it gets lonely. It’s a big house for one person to be rattling around in.”
“Well, one person and two dogs,” he says.
“Right.” We’re quiet for a moment, then, I bring up the inevitable. “So…about your houseguest. I guess there’s still no change? No word from Tanner?”
“So she says. I was hoping she’d be gone by now but…I don’t know. I’ve been walking on eggshells with her. Trying to help without pushing her too hard. She’s been trying, I’ll give her that. She’s been getting the place cleaned up, t
hat sort of thing. I haven’t pestered her about dealing with her father’s death but that’ll be next.”
“How’s she been, emotionally?”
“Fragile. But, I did make it clear to her that I’ll need my house and life back soon. I told her that I’m trying to start a new relationship with you and I can’t do it with her around.”
He looks at me frankly and soberly.
“Oh.” The strangest, most conflicting feelings I’ve ever had slice through me. Deep sadness for this poor little rich girl mixed with a kind of wild happiness for myself.
I’ve never felt anything so bittersweet before.
I don’t know how to express that feeling or even if I should, so I just take Rob’s arm and say, “How’d she take it?”
“Fine, actually. She said you seemed very nice. I told you, there’s no romantic feelings whatsoever between us. What we had of that, long ago, was brief and over with fast.”
“It’s cool. It’s none of my business,” I say, even though of course I’m dying to know.
He raises his eyebrows at me as if to say “Oh, really?” and grins like he can read my mind. “Anyway, I said I’d help her get hold of Tanner or another lawyer, but that I was going to talk to you and we’d decide how much longer she can stay. You and I.”
“You…no, I can’t…it’s not my place, Rob!”
“I’m making it your place. She needs to go home to D.C. and try to cope with this. She’s not locked out of the house. She’s not homeless, or penniless. Whatever’s going on with her money will be resolved sooner or later. But…that said…she really is grieving. And she really is alone. I don’t want to push her too hard, but I do want to push her.”
“Yes. I understand. It must be horrible for her. Are you saying she seriously has no friends? No one else she could go to?”
“She never did have many friends. She’s very eccentric, always was. You’ve seen it yourself.”
I nod.
“She can be hard to take. My parents didn’t like her. Even my brother barely tolerated her and he likes everyone. Anyway, that’s why she’s so dependent on her father. And, to a lesser extent, me.”
