He was silent, appearing to think it over, then said, his tone almost harsh, “So you would settle for respect and friendship, if nothing else was offered? That did not seem to be your intent when you came to my apartments several weeks ago.”
“I was desperate!” I cried. “I only wanted to speak to you in private at first, but I would be lying if I said I did not want to force your hand in some way, attempt to see if you had feelings for me but were only hiding them.”
Again he said nothing. After my heart had thudded two or three times in my breast, he took my hands, turned them palm up, and pressed his lips first against the one, then the other. My blood began to race at even that gentle pressure, although I willed myself to be calm, to see what he intended to do next.
I did not have to wait long. His fingers wrapped around mine, and he pulled me up against him, his mouth seeking mine, filling me with the sweet taste of him. It was not so very different from that other kiss, in the heat and the power of it, but this time he did not push me away, only held me close, our bodies pressed together. Even through the heavy brocade of his tunic, I could feel his arousal, but it did not frighten me. No, I wanted that part of him, too. I wanted everything that he could teach me.
Eventually he did pull away, but just enough so he could speak. “I am a fool.”
“No — ” I began, and he held up a hand.
“I am, for depriving myself of that all these months. How can I ever make amends?”
“I can think of one way,” I said, casting a significant glance upward to the second floor, where I knew his bedchamber was located.
This time it wasn’t a smile that lit up his face, but an outright grin. “Ah, my lady wife, my thoughts have run in the same direction. But allow me a small opportunity to woo you — a private dinner here, with no one else intruding, and then the wedding night you should have had long ago.”
I appeared to consider. “Well, if I have already waited a year, then I suppose a few more hours will not make much of a difference.” I tilted my head to one side, then asked, “And will it not cause a fuss, for you to cancel a public dinner already planned?”
“Oh, I will not cancel that one. The guests can come, as they always do, but they will find their host conspicuously absent.”
“Very daring of you, my lord.”
He bent and kissed me again, kissed me so thoroughly that the room quite began to spin around me. I would have been content to stay there in his arms forever, his mouth against mine, but after some minutes he drew away, saying, “There is one matter that troubles me, though.”
“Only one?”
The quip did not seem to move him, for his expression remained serious. “It is not good that you found the gate open and unattended. That is an unforgivable breach of the security here at the palace, and I must have the situation investigated and the negligent parties punished.”
Oh, dear. I had hoped he would have let that particular part of my story slip by unremarked. Loath as I was to reveal the true nature of my escape from the palace, I could not allow some innocent to be punished because of my actions. And really, attitudes toward magic here in Keshiaar were not quite the same as they were in Sirlende. Therissa was in no way at risk of being punished with death, or even banishment. Besh might not completely approve of what I had done, but I knew he would not take any action against the woman who had helped me.
“As to that” — I paused, then forged on ahead— “I might not have been entirely truthful as to how I managed to get outside the palace walls.”
An eyebrow lifted. “Indeed? Then precisely how did you manage it?”
“No one left the gate open. I walked out in the company of two guards, and the guards whose duty it was to watch the gate made sure it was closed securely behind us.”
“And how did you convince the guards to simply walk through the gate with the Hiereine of Keshiaar?”
“Because they did not know it was me. They thought they were with Miram, my chatelaine.”
He rubbed his chin, watching me closely. “Explain this.”
“The woman everyone thinks is Miram is — is not Miram,” I went on, hoping I had not just made a terrible mistake in deciding to reveal her identity.
“Then who is she?”
“Her true name is Therissa Larrin, and she is aunt to the Empress of Sirlende.”
A lift of the eyebrows, and he said, “I would say that if she is such a relation, then she should have been greeted with honor…but I think that if she has managed to disguise herself so well as your chatelaine, then there is something more here than you have told me so far.”
“There is.” We were not so far apart that I could not take his hands in mine, holding them tightly, as if that contact might help to make him understand why Therissa’s and my subterfuges had been so important. “Mistress Larrin is quite an accomplished wielder of magic, specifically of illusions that alter one’s appearance. And so she took on Miram’s identity, so that she might be here for me as a friend, since….” And here I faltered, because I was not certain how to proceed without sounding either pitiable or desperate.
“Since what?” Besh prompted, his tone gentle, as if he already had begun to understand.
“Since I had none.”
His fingers closed on mine, and he pulled me close, kissing not my mouth, but my forehead, his lips lingering there for a long while before he murmured, “My dear, I am so very sorry for that. Since you had brought no ladies-in-waiting with you, I had thought you did not mind being alone — ”
“And I thought I would not, save that Chancellor Tel-Karinoor sent my Sirlendian maids away, and so I had no one from home at all.” I looked up into his face, saw only concern there…concern perhaps mixed with regret. “Mistress Larrin is the kindliest of souls, and came to provide what support she could.”
“And how is it she even knew of your predicament? For truly, all these months you have carried on with such dignity and serenity that I find it difficult to believe anyone could have looked on you and seen that you were in any distress.”
I hesitated before answering; I most certainly did not wish to bring any trouble down upon the good ambassador, for I did not know how Besh would look upon his relationship with Therissa. But neither did I wish to lie, so I said, “She met with Ambassador Sel-Trelazar as he was passing through Tarenmar in South Eredor, and as they had been great good…friends…for some years, he told her something of my situation here. And so she traveled to Keshiaar to offer what support and friendship she could.”
Besh did not question me further on their relationship. I guessed he knew exactly what I had meant when I referred to them as “friends.” “It must have been quite a burden to her, to maintain such a spell day in and day out. But what happened to the real Miram?”
“Oh, Mistress Larrin paid her off, saying she had come into a great inheritance, and Miram went off to enjoy her money far away from any relations who might attempt to lay claim to it.”
He actually laughed at that. “Ah, so Miram had a happy ending. I had rather feared that you would tell me this Mistress Larrin had her kidnapped and taken away to be a slave in Seldd, or some such.”
“You know I would never countenance such a thing,” I said severely. “And neither would Mistress Larrin. She is truly all that is good, and it is so very unfortunate that the laws in Sirlende regarding magic are so severe that she could not remain there to be an aunt to my sister-in-law, as the Empress has no other family in the world.” Well, not any she wishes to acknowledge, I thought, although her stepsisters apparently have improved markedly now that they are living away from their mother.
“And fortunate that we do not have such laws here, I suppose,” Besh remarked. “While I cannot say I precisely approve such a subterfuge, I can see why you thought it was necessary. And so this last time you escaped the palace while disguised as Miram, and she took on your appearance, so as to make everyone think you were safely in your quarters.”
�
��Precisely that. I did not think there would be any harm in it, as I intended to go to only one stall in the bazaar, and I had the guards with me, of course. But there was a disturbance in the street, and we were separated, and I could do nothing but attempt to make my way back here as best I could.”
“Ah, yes, that ‘disturbance.’” He let go of my hands then, moving with restless steps toward his desk, where he rummaged amongst the papers there and seemed to peer down at one of them. “‘Seditious speech and fomenting rebellion’ was how the captain of the guards phrased it, once his soldiers had made their report.”
“Well,” I began, then paused. The execution of the ironmonger’s younger brother was probably still a sore subject, and I saw no way to bring it up without appearing to criticize my husband, or at the very least his chancellor. Then again, I knew we would have to discuss the matter at some point. “The ironmonger did lose his brother, and for reasons he finds difficult to understand.”
“What is so difficult to understand about being found guilty of treason, and losing one’s head for it?”
This was a side of Besh I did not much like — expression severe, implacable. No doubt he was anticipating another argument on the subject. That was the last thing I wished for, especially now, when so many of the barriers between us seemed to be breaking down, but to let it go would make me a hypocrite, and I would not be so weak.
“I suppose it is not so difficult, if the charges of treason had any bearing in fact.”
“I saw the evidence. You did not.”
“And what was that evidence, pray?” I crossed my arms and stared up at him, refusing to look away, even as his brows lowered and his lips thinned.
“Documents showing he had paid for a group of mercenaries from al-Sirtan,” Besh said, naming a province in the far south of Keshiaar known for its unruly population. The rule of law did not lie as heavy that far from the capital.
“Paid off how? I will confess to not being completely familiar with the finances of the artisan class, but I find it difficult to believe that the younger brother of an ironmonger would have the resources to hire a squad of scullery maids, let alone a fully mounted and heavily armed troop like the one that attacked us that night.”
My husband’s mouth compressed further. “Indeed, my lady wife, if I had known you were such a passionate defender of the downtrodden, I would have assigned you as the man’s legal representative.”
“And perhaps I would have done better by him,” I retorted, then shook my head, going to Besh and laying a hand on his arm. “Dearest, I don’t wish to quarrel with you over this. But even I can see something dreadfully wrong about the evidence…about everything.” Should I leave it at that, or bring up my misgivings about the visanis? We were already arguing, however, and so I decided it was better to press forward. “I cannot say what his motivations might be, but I fear that somehow Chancellor Tel-Karinoor created the evidence so there would be an easy conviction.”
Besh stared at me as if I had gone mad. “Why in the world would he do something like that?”
“I don’t know,” I said, taking care to keep my tone level, so I would not sound like a hysterical woman flinging out unfounded accusations. “Neither do I know why he would dismiss my Sirlendian maids, nor why he would do his best to give the impression that I was a light-minded woman incapable of deep devotion, so you would not risk coming to care for me. I do not know any of these things, but they have happened, and so there must be some motivation behind them, even if we cannot say for sure what it might be.”
During all this Besh had listened with his lips pressed firmly together, jaw taut, as if forcing himself not to interrupt me. When I was done speaking, he waited for a few seconds, watching me carefully, as if attempting to see some truth in my face. Then he said, voice tight, sounding very unlike himself, “I had not thought of it that way. But when you present all the information together….” I saw him take in a breath, and give a shake of his head. “I fear the matter bears some looking into.”
Relief spread through me, relief that my husband was a reasonable man, not one to ignore logic and instead cling to his ideas of what should be. “I think that might be a very good idea, my husband. But leave it aside for now, to be taken up on the morrow. We have more interesting matters to occupy us today.”
His eyes lit then, as if he had just recalled our planned assignation tonight. “I very much look forward to all of those…matters. In the meantime, though, I fear I have several appointments that cannot be pushed aside. Every hour will be a century, but I will have an escort bring you here at dusk, and we will share a dinner.”
“And so much more,” I added, smiling as I went on my tiptoes to kiss him quickly. Not a deep, passionate kiss, but rather a promise of what would come later.
He saw the kiss for what it was, returning it lightly, then saying, “I will have the guards take you back to your chambers, but you will return here soon enough. And after that” —he paused, as if to give his next words greater emphasis— “you will not have to return to your apartments ever again, if you do not wish to. We can make our home here, together.”
Joy surged within me at those words. It was no small thing, to invite me to share this place with him, for truly it was his private retreat from the world. And I knew in Keshiaar, as it was in Sirlende, that the Hiereine always had her own suite. It was quite a break from tradition, one he was willing to make for me.
“I would like that very much,” I told him, not trusting myself to say much more, for I could feel the afternoon’s emotions beginning to overcome me.
He took my hand and raised it to his lips. “Then I will make sure that some of your things are brought over as well. Until dusk, my dearest wife.”
“Until dusk,” I murmured, then took my leave of him, my heart full and my mind racing ahead to all the coming night promised.
* * *
Of course Therissa was waiting for me, her expression anxious, for I had been taken straight to see my husband upon my discovery in the street, and so had no opportunity to speak with her and let her know what had happened. What she had done to conceal her own transformation back into “herself” — well, Miram, at any rate — I did not know, but as the three maids were quietly stitching away on the new draperies as I entered my apartments, it seemed she must have done a good enough job of it.
At once the maids abandoned their sewing and bowed, even as Therissa hurried forward, brow puckered in confusion. “My lady…?”
“All is well, Miram,” I said, with just the slightest dip of my head in her direction so she might know I would discuss matters further with her when I had the opportunity. “But I am having a private supper with His Most High Majesty this evening, and so I think it best we start preparing right away, after I have had my luncheon.” Indeed, I was quite famished by then, for it was now almost two hours past noon, and the time when I should have eaten had come and gone. “Something light, however, so as not to interfere with my supper,” I added.
“Of course, my lady. I will see to it directly.” As she spoke, I could see the beginnings of a smile beginning to play around her mouth, despite her best efforts to suppress it. It was quite obvious she understood the ramifications of that “private supper.” Then she turned to Lila and Marsali and Alina, her manner suddenly brisk. “Lila, off to the kitchens to fetch a tray for Her Most High Majesty. Marsali and Alina, go begin to run a bath so that it will be ready when she is done eating.”
They all scampered to obey, Lila heading for the door, the other two going to the bath chamber. After they had gone, Therissa shot a questioning eyebrow in my direction.
“I see you managed to escape unscathed, my lady.”
“I did, thank you.” In an undertone, I added, “It was touch and go for a bit, but in the end it was all for the best, as my lord husband and I have reconciled, and all is as it should be.”
Her face lit up so much at this news that even Miram’s plain features were transformed, and I
began to understand what the under-cook might see in her. “Oh, that is so very good to hear. I was so worried — ”
“All is well, and I see you managed everything here in my absence, so pray, let us not speak of it further.”
She seemed to understand, her gaze darting in the direction of the bath chamber, where Alina and Marsali were at work, then nodded. “Of course, my lady. I will begin to lay out your garments. Something very special, I think?”
I smiled at her. “Yes. This will truly be my wedding night.”
A bob of her head and a smile, and she was off to inspect my wardrobe. A few minutes after that, Lila returned with a tray of cheese and fruit, and some of the nutty-flavored flatbread I liked so much. Usually my luncheon was more substantial, but as I was eating late, I did not want to be weighed down too much. It was enough to calm the pangs in my stomach, and that was all I required.
Afterward, it was time for my bath, and I luxuriated in the rose-scented water for a long while, glad to get rid of the stink of the streets, which felt as if it still clung to my hair and skin. Then the long process of drying my hair, and applying rose-scented oils, and the ritual painting of my face — belatedly, I realized I had left the little bag with my purchases down in Besh’s study — and at last the donning of my garments one by one. First the under-blouse of filmy silk, and then the billowing trousers of silver tissue, and at last the tunic of white damask with its intricate edging of silver trim sewn with crystals and pearls.
Therissa settled the headdress of silver and diamonds on my head, murmuring, “Truly you are the most beautiful bride I have ever seen, my lady. I cannot tell you how happy I am at how all this has worked out.”
“Thank you, Therissa,” I said, in equally low tones, so the maids could not hear how I had used her real name. But I was so grateful to her for so many things, I wanted to use the name she had been born with, and not the one of her subterfuge.
One Thousand Nights (Tales of the Latter Kingdoms Book 6) Page 24
