Love, Life and Naughty Bits

Home > Other > Love, Life and Naughty Bits > Page 14
Love, Life and Naughty Bits Page 14

by Tania Cooper


  

  “Well, that was something different.”

  “Was it what you thought it would be? Rockpool is a pretty high end joint.”

  “The food was wonderful, but quite pricey for what you actually get, although I suppose most high end places are like that. Still, the views from the place are stunning and I love the idea you had. A barge banner would certainly capture a lot of attention from the riverside restaurants and offices.”

  “Well, from what the client has said, it would be a viable avenue to put forward, but we can discuss all this at the office. I’d much rather just enjoy the time and company on the way back. If that’s okay with you?”

  “Certainly is.”

  “There’s hope yet, baby.”

  “There certainly is, Eight.”

  

  “Morning, Clive.”

  “Morning, Mr. Anderson.”

  “Did anything come from that incident yesterday?”

  “Not really, although we do now have Larry running night patrols every forty-five when he’s on shift. Same applies to the other staff when they’re here.”

  “Small mercy being a static day shifter then I’m guessing, hey Clive.”

  “Ah, I dunno, I quite like the nights, I like the quiet, but I get the roster the boss dishes out so … it is what it is.”

  “I hear ya. Have a good one.”

  “You too, sir.”

  Well another day, another dollar. I can feel you’re eager to get up there, but there’s something off in you today. You were all happy chappy yesterday, but now, not so much; are you pining from not sending me swimming in her pink lagoon? You know my girl wouldn’t like me calling her that, but you only deal in crass rubbish with your boys so I guess it’s a good way to get my point across. Oh for the days when you could actually be swayed by my suggestions, although I suppose you still can to an extent, but nothing like you used to be. The days gone by when all I had to do was twitch a certain way and off you would go, like a whippet out of the starting gate. Now I’m lucky if I can convince you to fart to order, let alone do anything else. Getting you this far with Alexis is proof enough of just how blind to my influence you’ve become.

  I really do think some days it would have been better if I had packed up my balls and left with Miss Queen Bitch. She tried hard enough to take them when you two broke up. Oh, umm, sorry, I didn’t mean that, yeah I felt that pang, sorry Lane. Ahh fuck, I’ve gone and woke up those old memories. I better warn Hot Lips when I see her. Today is not going to be a good day.

  

  “Morning, Lane.”

  “Yeah. Hi.”

  “Is something wrong?”

  “Nothing, I’m fine, let’s just get to work.”

  “Uh, oh okay. You just look a little upset, that’s all.”

  “I said I’m fine. Now can we please get some work done?”

  “Yeah sure.”

  “Uh, Eight, what is up with our boy?”

  “I sort of woke up some bad memories, by accident and on the way in he kinda got a bit moody.”

  “A bit. He’s acting like King Twat again. My girl is fluxing all over the place; her heart is going very cold at the moment, fear and worry cold. She used to be like a freaking super nova around our boy, now it’s like Antarctica in there. What the fuck did you do?”

  “He was being a bit of a nob and trying to squash his feelings down, you know after Tuesday’s lunch date and all going so well. He kinda scared himself and I didn’t want to have to redo all of our work on him, so I gave him a bit of a nudge, but I must have gone a bit too far.”

  “What did you do?”

  “I mentioned Miss Queen Bitch to him, and pulled on the strings linking to her leaving.”

  “Oh Jesus, you fucking idiot.”

  “Yeah.”

  “I’m going to have to really pump in the empathy today, try and get my girl to empathise with him rather than take it to heart. This ain’t good, you could have fucked this right up you know.”

  “You think I don’t know that!”

  “Don’t you shout at me Mister, I ain’t the one who just butt shagged Pandora’s Box into opening.”

  

  “So Lane, what’s on the agenda for lunch today? Got any plans, another idea trail or maybe lunch in?”

  “Nothing actually, I have some conference calls to make.”

  “Uh okay … have I done something to upset you? If I have I am sorry.”

  “No, I’m just busy. I’ll see you back here after lunch.”

  “Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Hot Lips I’m sorry, I will fix this. Shit.”

  “You bloody well better, my girl is close to tears here.”

  “Fuck!”

  

  “Morning, Mr. Anderson.”

  Are you going to answer him? No … ah shit … I have messed up big time, you have a deeper cloud over you than the ash clouds that buried Pompeii. Damn it, there has to be a way to fix this.

  “Mr. Anderson?”

  “Sorry, he’s well, ah, shit I fucked up mate; tell your boy I said sorry.”

  “Yeah, no shit.”

  “Hold the elevator, please.”

  Oh now that was just cruel, that kid was just delivering the mail. Did you have to stand there and watch him drop it all as he tried to stop the doors closing? It wasn’t that bad … was it? Let’s have a look. Oh … oh no. Damn it.

  “Morning, Lane”

  “Hi.”

  “Is everything okay? You look a little pent up and your eyes are a bit dark. You’re not falling ill from over working are you?”

  “I’m fine.”

  “You really don’t look it.”

  “I said I’m fine, let’s just get to work already.”

  “Okay, sheesh. Sorry for caring.”

  Yeah now you felt that one, that’s a good sign, you’re not too far gone. I may be able to pull this back from the edge after all. Right, let’s see.

  “Eight, you need to get to work on this. My girl is really going through a spin because of how Lane is acting towards her. I don’t know how much more she can take before she snaps at him.”

  “I’m working on it, just a little while longer I promise, sweetheart. I promise.”

  “Okay, I trust you.”

  “I know.”

  Come on bro, we can do this, find that happy point, where is it, ah how’s this, Lexi’s giggle, you always like that. Yeah that’ll take the edge off of this. Oh yep, that’s a twitch in me, we’re hitting a nerve with this alright and it feels like a good one. Okay, now just sit down at your desk and close your eyes a moment. Holy fuck you just did that, are you really back to that point. Let’s test it, okay, um, adjust me to the left. Christ on a bike, you just did it. Okay then, sit back, recline your chair and breathe deeply. Atta boy, okay now. Focus on her smile, that soft dimply one where she cocks her head to the left a little, you know the one where her hair falls just past her ear and a few strands catch on the edge of her eye making her brush it away behind her ear. That’s it, you like that a lot, don’t you bro, yeah focus on that, focus on how it makes you feel. Focus on how she makes you feel.

  “Eight?”

  “Not now babe, we’re getting there.”

  “No I know, the pheromones are strong off you, but Lexi is about to say something and I cannot stop her, she is determined to ask.”

  “Oh crap, what is it?”

  “She’s going to bite the bullet and ask him about it.”

  “It?”

  “It, as in what he wouldn’t tell her, she thinks that it is what has made him switch like he has.”

  “Oh crap, well, she’s right, but, fuck! Okay, uh.”

  Bro, I need you to call Woody, now. Make it about the security issues, say that Andre mentioned something about Lexi and you want to follow up on it.

  “Lane, have you got a minute?”

  “Uh, one sec Woody. Not really Lex, can it wait?”
/>   “Yeah I guess so, I was …”

  “What?”

  “Well, after yesterday and that, I was just a little worried about you, that’s all. Just wanted to see if you wanted to talk about anything.”

  “No I’m fine …. Thanks.”

  “Okay. I’ll maybe talk to you later then. I’m going to go and get some more of the designs printed out.”

  “Yeah okay. Sorry about that, Woody.”

  “Too close, too bloody close.”

  “Yeah, but it still doesn’t help my girl feel any better.”

  “Sorry baby, but Lane is getting there. I’ve taken the edges off it, he’s still a little dark, but it should be an easier fix now.”

  “It better be. My girl isn’t going to take much more of the sudden chill down.”

  

  “Well, I’m heading home Lane, see you tomorrow?”

  “Yeah, I’m packing up myself now.”

  “You know, I know we’ve not been working together all that long in the scheme of things, but if you need to talk about anything, I’m here, it’s what a colleague and friend does.”

  “Thanks, but as I said, I’m fine.”

  “Well, okay, but still I stand by what I said.”

  “Yeah, thanks Lex, see you in the morning.”

  

  “Hey boys! Fuck this has been a fucking awful week.”

  “You’re telling us, what happened to the ‘no mid-week sessions until the job is done rule’ that was a pretty stringent point of yours? And by the looks of things, it is one you’re about to shoot in the back of the head.”

  “Yeah well, despite the whole Lexi thing, I have had a pretty shitty couple of days. Memories of Miss Queen Bitch came rolling back into town and has plagued my every damned thought. I just need someone or something to blow it all away. Just completely glass her clean.”

  “Well shit, me and Bookend will take care of you, what you looking for, tall, short, blonde, brunette; Asian, Caucasian? What?”

  “I don’t give two shits mate, as long as I can wipe this shit from my head and forget about that bitch, Lexi, and the whole damned scenario.”

  Hey! Hang on one motherfucking minute, you are not fucking around on Lexi, fuck no, that girl deserves better, Lane, and you bloody well know it. I’m not letting this happen, no way no how. Now, let’s get some sabotage going. Tequila shots. Now!

  “Boys, line ‘em up, I’m one thirsty dude and if we are going hunting I need to get my war face on.”

  “That’s my boy. Benji, line them the fuck up.”

  Here we go, yeah, I can feel my walls softening, no way in hell you’re getting a steeler out of me. I hope your date likes soft sausage, because at this rate I’m going to be softer than a boiled hotdog.

  

  “Whoops, ha, shush, you’ll wake Mrs. Genaro and she is a whiney old bitch at the best of times.”

  “Ha, like I care, I don’t live here and all I want is what’s in here.”

  Lovely, I have drunk slut’s hands on me. Ugh I feel dirty already.

  “Well good, because you are going to get it and get it hard.”

  “Mmm, I hope so, I’ve been wanting this all evening.”

  “Then brace yourself sexy, here it comes.”

  Oh fuck no, I’m not hitting that! There is no way in hell I’m slipping into that velvet pocket. Do you know what Hot Lips would do to me if she found out?

  “I’ve got some Hot Lips right here for you, big boy.”

  “You can shut it as well, I’m going nowhere near you. Hell, I can smell from here that you’ve taken more poundings than Frank Bruno. Besides, I’m spoken for.”

  Lane, don’t do this. Seriously, stop! You’re going to regret this; I’m not going to rise to the event no matter what you do. Nothing and I mean nothing is going to make me harder than an overcooked noodle no matter what.

  “So, what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her, so why not pull on out and slip on in. Hmm?”

  “I said no, and I mean it, you drunk scrag.”

  “Well fuck you.”

  “No! That’s my point.”

  “Come on then stud, slip him out and slide him in, I am more than ready.”

  You’re going to regret this, Lane, I mean it, do not pull me out of your jocks; seriously mate, last warning. Oh you idiot, you really are going to regret this.

  “Well, it’s uh, longer than I thought, but, well ....”

  “Yeah I uh, I don’t know what’s up.”

  “Well it certainly ain’t him.”

  “Hang on. Come on, don’t do this to me.”

  Rub me all you want Lane, I ain’t getting up, nope, not even rubbing on my eye is going to get me up tonight. Lexi and Hot Lips deserve more than this, they deserve the real you. Not the drunken idiot that is trying to get between this bar skank’s thighs.

  “Uh, so are you going to lift his head anytime soon, or am I going to just be staring at a lump of limp steak now?”

  “Fuck, hang on, give me a minute. He is going to be harder than iron any moment now.”

  “He better, because watching you stroke that lump of limp skin is boring as fuck.”

  “Hold on, ahh for fuck sakes come on ….”

  “Look, if we’re not going to fuck, I’m going to go.”

  “No hold on, I seriously don’t know what is going on here.”

  “I do, whiskey dick, you’re too pissed to get it up and I can see from here he ain’t going anywhere, so I’m outta here. Have fun with that piece of wet sausage, I sure as shit didn’t.”

  “Ha, bye, bye bitch, go find some drunken trucker to suck and fuck, because my boy is off limits.”

  “Shit, thanks mate, thanks for making me look like a limp dink. Ah who am I kidding, this is my fault. What was I thinking when I came up with the idea of shafting some one-nighter to try and get Alexis outta my head. Damn it, that girl is in my every waking thought, what the hell am I going to do?”

  Well mate, you could start with admitting that you love her.

  “I guess it’s time to face facts. I’m well and truly in love with this woman, damn it! What the hell do I do now?”

  “What the fuck is wrong with him? He is worse than yesterday and I have just about had enough of his Jekyll and Hyde routine. I was stupid to even think Mr. Uptight would disappear completely. But I did get my hopes up with all his cute smiles and sweet gestures. I’m such a fool.”

  No, no Lexi, you are not a fool, he is. He is a fucked up, cold, emotionally stunted piece of male stupidness. Even Eight is having trouble understanding his boy. I mean, he got rid of his ex’s stuff, decluttered his life of all the emotional attachment to her memories, but didn’t have a clue on how to move forward. Fear, fear of love can bring down even the toughest of men. But that doesn’t mean we have to sit by and take his crap.

  Alexis stays in the break room, taking a little longer than normal to make her morning coffee after being subjected to Lane’s foul mood the minute she walked in this morning. The first feeling I got from him was sadness, a deep-seated sadness. I was hoping it was because he realised what an arse he had been to my girl the past two days, after being so damn sweet the two days before that. But no, his sadness was soon superseded by his grumpiness and his need to push Alexis further and further away.

  My girl may be frustrated by his grumpiness, but more than that, she is hurt. Within a few short days, she had started to invest her heart in her attraction to Lane, only to have him practically throw it back in her face. The sting of rejection can cause more harm internally than would ever show on one’s face; and the deeper cuts, well, they don’t always heal so well.

  I do the best I can to pump her with happy hormones after giving the brain a heads up to boost all her creative juices. She needs to re-focus solely on this project and do what she does best. Kick some corporate butt! But it’s going to be a challenge with the cause of her discontent sitting barely five feet from her all day long for weeks
to come.

  “Hey Hot Lips, sorry about my boy, I’m trying my best to reign in his crazy emotions, but I must admit, it’s a struggle. He’s literally all over the place. But rest assured, his feelings for our girl are still strong, stronger than ever in fact. It’s just that the idiot is still trying to fight them and he’s fighting them hard.”

  “I don’t care what his feelings are for my girl at this moment, Eight. She’s hurting and I don’t like it! I really think this rollercoaster he has her on will have whatever chance they had at making a go of their attraction crashing and burning before it even has a real chance to take off.”

  “What’re you saying?”

  “I’m saying that it’d take a miracle for him to repair the damage he’s done by acting the grumpy sod, after only days ago giving her a taste of what you tell me is the real Lane. His mood swings aren’t worth the risk to my girl’s sanity.”

  “Are you giving up on … us?”

  “I’d never do that, I’m just trying to face the harsh reality of the situation. The only chance you and I may ever get to be intimate is when the project finishes, and we somehow get them to go out and celebrate, then they both get shitfaced together and accidentally fall into bed. The regret the day after would be worth it, if I got to spend only one night joined to your heat.”

  “Oh damn, beautiful, one night will never be enough. Let’s just hope my boy gets his head out of his arse sooner rather than later.”

  “Fingers crossed.”

  Alexis sits at her desk and tries her hardest to concentrate on the work in front of her, but when she lifts her head slightly to glance at Mr. Uptight and sees the deep frown masking his features, her heart plummets to the bottom of her stomach. Old insecurities come rushing back with a vengeance as she once again feels that somehow she isn’t good enough in this man’s eyes.

  Between big brain and I, we pump up her creative juices so high that she produces some of her best work yet. Instead of running her ideas by Mr. Uptight, she just forwards them straight to the client for pre-approval. She continues working in silence while at least feeling good about the work she is creating. When lunchtime comes around, she doesn’t even bother checking what Mr. Uptight wants to do, she just throws her phone in her bag, places the strap over her shoulder and walks out of the office, needing a break from his angry grunts and the swearing under his breath.

 

‹ Prev