by Mj Fields
I look down, feeling my face heating up.
He lifts my chin so our eyes meet. “I’ll take you every way I can get you.”
“Any way,” I correct him.
He shakes his head. “Every way.”
He kisses my head and leaves me smiling and less worried, a lot less worried.
I grab the very plain black tee-shirt in the laundry basket that Mags sent down and put it on over my head before sitting down to pull on a pair of pants.
“Dammit,” I mumble when I realize nothing is going to fit over my cast, nothing but his boxers that I have lived in since being here...home.
He walks in the room and peeks around the corner. “Need help?”
“I need this cast off,” I grumble, giving it one more try, knowing it won’t help.
He smirks. “Gonna have to wear my tee shirt as a dress.”
“Or just stay in.” I flop back on the bed.
He walks over to the closet—well, the corner where my clothes hang on a rod—and pulls down a yellow sundress. “This?”
“No,” I grumble.
He still has it, held out and eyeing it while biting his lip. God, he’s more beautiful, and so much harder. I stop and laugh at the irony in that thought
“What?” he asks.
I look up, shaking my head, trying not to smile.
“Spill it.”
“It’s stupid,” I tell him as I feel my face flush.
“Now you have to tell me.”
“You.” I shrug. “You’re still...you. My hero. The boy who didn’t judge me. The boy who became everything to me. But harder.”
“Harder?” He laughs a little uncomfortably.
“Yeah, that’s what made me laugh, too. Just harder. Your body...all of it. I mean, damn.”
“Damn?”
I nod. “Damn. And your determination...” I look up at him. “I like it.”
“I know you do.” He holds up the dress. “I like this.”
“Then I’ll wear it for you another time. How about something longer?”
He nods then holds up a black maxi dress. “This?”
“Sure.”
***
I’m on his back. Yes, his back, because I think it would be inappropriate for him to carry me cradled in his arms to the bonfire and, as he says, “Doesn’t give a damn.” As we walk out the door, one arm is around his chest, the other has crutches in it.
“This isn’t going to work,” I say through a laugh. “Put me down.”
“It’ll work if you stop squirming,” he grumbles.
“I’m going to drop these things.” I rub my hand over his chest, feeling for the piercing, and when I find it, I give it a tug.
“That move right there will land you on your back faster than me carrying you across the field.” He looks back at me, and I do it again. “I’m destroying you tonight.” His threat entices me.
I look up when I hear the sound of a vehicle and laugh when I see it’s Brandon and...well, Phoenix.
“Wanna lift, little lady?” Brandon asks as they come to a stop a few feet in front of us.
“I got her,” Garrett says.
I interrupt, “Yes.”
I sit in the front, cast to the side, and the men I love are in the back as Phoenix drives us to the lake.
I look over my shoulder at her as I scoot around. “Thanks.”
“No problem,” she says, jumping out and putting the key in her pocket.
Brand is standing on one side of me, Garrett on the other, as we walk toward the bonfire. It’s huge, it’s intimidating, it appears all-consuming, yet the kids, all of them, are dancing around without a care in the world as Grayson plays his guitar and sings.
“Let’s get you seated,” Garrett says, rubbing his hand up and down my back.
“Over here, Mom, with all the ladies,” Brandon says, skipping in front of us.
I follow him, even though I would prefer to sit with the kids because there is less judgement.
“You okay?” Garrett asks quietly.
I nod. “I’m fine.”
He sucks in a breath. “Fine?”
I nod.
“Fine’s one of those words that you women say and mean the total opposite.”
He’s not wrong.
“Fine means I’m not fucking fine at all. I’m pissed. I’m uncomfortable. I’m...all the above. But that’s not what matters.” I nod toward Brandon, who is standing by a wooden chaise with padding.
“Fine.” Garrett smiles. “But if it gets to be too much—”
“I’ll still be fine,” I whisper.
He nods.
I sit down and Brandon smiles. “You okay?”
“I am.” I swing my leg up and on the chaise.
“I’m going to grab a drink; what would you like?” Garrett asks me.
“Tea’s fine,” I answer.
“How about you, Brand?”
He smiles. “I’ll have a beer.”
“What?” Garrett and I both ask at the same time.
He leans in and whispers, “Root beer, geesh. I’ll go show you, Dad.”
I smile as I watch them walk away together.
Phoenix comes over and holds out a hotdog. “Mags thought you’d like this.”
I hear a snort and look in its direction. A woman with black hair, red lipstick, and sunglasses covering her eyes shrugs. “Sorry, just messed up.”
“Kat,” some pregnant blonde—I think it’s Jase’s wife—scolds her. “Hush.”
“You see this?” She holds up a glass of wine. “This isn’t hush juice, Carly.”
“Like it would matter if it was,” a redhead, Taelyn, pipes in.
Kat flips her off. “Sit on it, Taelyn.”
I look away from them and take the hotdog from Phoenix. “Thanks.”
Kat leans forward. “So, let me get this straight. You married Gage when you were knocked up with his brother’s kid, he ran off and fucked his way around the West Coast, and you lied for how many years?”
“Don’t be a judgmental bitch, Kat,” Zandor’s wife, Becca, who is also pregnant, pipes in.
“I’m not judging. I’m in awe.” She holds up her wine glass. “You’re my fucking hero.”
“I don’t really care what you or anyone else thinks of me, actually,” I tell her. “What I do care about is how my son gets through this, so I ask that, when he’s around, you keep your comments to yourself.”
She smirks. “You just keep getting better.”
“Back off, Kat,” Phoenix says, sitting down in the chair next to me.
She laughs. “I should feel judged here.”
“You’re kind of being a bitch,” a small, dark-haired woman—I’m pretty sure it’s Cyrus’s wife—whispers.
“Tara, I am only saying what the rest of you are wondering.” She sighs. “Is that being a bitch?”
“It is,” I answer for Tara. “But I will tell you that, like you, I didn’t think before I acted. I didn’t. I wanted Garrett’s son to be raised by Garrett’s family. It was selfish, it was hurtful to many, but I was an eighteen-year-old girl, living in a motel—”
“Juliana, you don’t have to explain. I’ve only known her for a couple days, and I know she won’t lose any sleep over it,” Phoenix says.
“Over what?” Gage asks, handing her a glass of wine.
Phoenix shakes her head. “Girl talk.”
His eyes go directly to Kat. “They said girl talk and you haven’t run yet?”
“I’m a girl.” She laughs.
He looks back at Phoenix. “You good?”
She smiles. “I’m good.”
He leans down and kisses her.
“See? Right there. Tell me that shit’s not awkward as fuck,” Kat says, pushing her shades onto her head.
“What the fuck did I walk into?” Gage grumbles.
“It’s nothing,” Phoenix and I both say at the same time.
“Well, thank God, because I really could give a shit less abou
t the whole sister-wives thing. I just wanted you two to feel the pressure I feel.”
“You feel?” Phoenix laughs.
“I’ve had both your men’s dicks in my hand. There, cat’s out of the bag.” Kat laughs. “I feel so much fucking better now.”
When she leans back, Phoenix looks at Gage. “You let me become friends with a chick you fucked?’
He narrows his eyes a little as if there is some different meaning in that statement than what Kat meant to bring out.
“I may have gone through a time that—”
“Your boyfriend fucked a friend of mine. She was digging him; he was not digging her. I squeezed his sack.” She shrugs. “I hope it hurt, fucker.”
Garrett walks over with a tea in his hand as Brandon runs by, arms full of dark bottles of “Beer.”
“That one, I speared when he was fucked up,” she says, pointing at Garrett.
He looks back at her. “Kat?”
“Yeah, Jesus, I pierced your cock, and you’re looking at me like you don’t even know me. Missed a wedding because of it, too.” She looks at Gage. “Hate weddings, anyway. Dicks, I like them.” She looks back at me. “You like my work?”
My face immediately feels as hot as the bonfire looks.
“No comment means yes.” She raises her wine glass. “You’re welcome.”
“She starting shit?”
I look up at a man covered in ink.
Gage nods. “Your woman needs a muzzle.”
“So, is his dick pierced?” Phoenix asks, to which Gage’s mouth gapes open. “What? She’s had yours in her hand. Stuck his with a...pin.”
“Fucker was bigger than a pin. Impressive piece of man meat.” Kat laughs. “But Ricco’s dick...sweet baby Jesus, it’s—”
“Kat,” the man behind her, Ricco, shakes his head.
“A unicorn,” she whispers.
“Jesus, Kat, will you just—”
“With a turtleneck,” she adds before sitting back.
“You’re uncut, man?” Zandor, Gage’s high school best friend, asks.
Ricco rolls his eyes as he chuckles.
“Love the man or his dick, Kat?” Zandor asks.
“Both,” she smarts back.
Ricco grips her shoulders from behind, and she looks up at him. He winks, and she smiles.
She does have teeth, not fangs, and her smile is actually nice.
Ricco holds his hand out to Garrett. “Good to see you, man.”
Garrett shakes his hand and nods. “You, too.”
He looks down at me. “Juliana, sorry to hear about you getting attacked.”
“She got attacked?” Kat gasps.
I look down.
“She did. Lucky to be alive,” Garrett answers.
“Do you not watch the news back home? Been all over the news,” Zandor tells her.
“It’s depressing,” she says, looking at me. “Shit, sorry about that.”
“It’s fine.” I shrug.
“No, it’s not fine.” Garrett looks down at me.
“It happens?”
“Never again,” he says, eyes narrowing.
“Mom!”
I look over as Brand waves to me.
I wave back and smile.
His eyes go left, and I see a girl, a girl who’s older than him, and she’s very pretty. I give him a big smile and two thumbs up. He grins back and nods. Then he’s off running toward the massive slide and swings.
“Damn, he looks different,” Zandor says, looking at my son. “Bigger?”
“Kids do that. They grow.” Gage laughs. “He’s shot up like a weed in the past month.”
“He was a surgeon? Your boyfriend? He lived with you? Jesus Christ.”
I look over to see Kat is looking at her phone. She must have googled my name.
“I don’t want Brandon to know that, either,” I warn her.
“What’s either mean, Kat?” Gage asks.
“It’s nothing,” I answer, still looking at her. I don’t want her to ask about Gage and Garrett again. I just want normal.
“You okay, Juliana?” Garrett asks.
I nod. “I’m fine.”
He sighs and shakes his head, then his eyes turn toward her.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Lucky She’s A Girl
Garrett
“What the fuck did you say to her?” I snap.
“Garrett, it’s fine,” Juliana say, trying to grab my hand.
“There’s that word again.” I shake my head and look back at Kat. “What did you—”
“Man, no disrespect, but watch the way you talk to her,” Ricco warns.
“I’ve met you three times, man—never saw a dick side to you—but her”—I point to Kat— “different story. I wanna know what she said.”
“Garrett, it’s okay. It’s over—”
“Asked her the obvious question. Pretty impressed she pulled it off.” Kat shrugs. “No big deal.”
Phoenix stands up. “Garrett, she handled it just fine. Jesus, give her some credit.”
“She handled it the only way she could. She’s dealt with enough for the six-plus years I was gone. Now you got me, Kat. Questions?” I pound my chest. “Shoot, I got them.”
“Garrett.” Juliana grabs my hand. “She was just asking what they all wonder.”
“If anyone has a reason to be pissed off here, it’s me,” Gage interrupts. “And not saying I’m not still chewing on shit once in a while, but we got this. We’re handling it. Brand’s happy as hell; happier than he has been in years. We’re one big, fucked-up, dysfunctional family, always have been, always will be, but we have each other’s backs. We give a fuck about each other. We see the roles we played in a twisted, little tale that started a night we were all fucked up. We own ‘em.” He looks at Juliana. “I own my role; you, yours; him, his; and well, Mom’s a different story.”
“She had no choice,” Juliana says. “She didn’t, Gage. She kept my secret because she...because she loves you all.”
“I didn’t know you could actually voice an opinion, Juliana,” he says in a way that rubs me wrong.
“I didn’t, either,” she says, tears pooling in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Gage, I truly am.”
“You don’t have to keep fucking defending yourself,” I tell her.
“You’re right,” Gage says then takes a drink. “Over and done with.”
“Well then.” Kat claps her hands together then picks her glass up. “Cheers to that. Bygones and shit.”
“Mom?”
I look behind me to see Brand.
“Hey, you wanna go grab some marshmallows to make s’mores?” I ask, catching Brand before he gets to Juliana while she’s upset.
“Yes!” He pumps his little fist in the air.
“Cool. Show me where they are.”
I scoot him away and look back. She’s not looking at them. She’s looking at me, and she’s looking at Brand, smiling.
***
Brand is smiling off in the distance, and I’m smiling because he is.
“You like it here, Dad?” he asks
“Always have,” I tell him. “Makes you think about nothing but the fields, the trees, the fresh air, and family. Everything that’s important. I missed so damn much, Brand. I promise, never again”
He shakes his head. “I know.”
“Your mom, she’s my angel,” I tell him “You, you’re my blessing.”
He smiles. “And you’re our cowboy. Now I’m gonna get to be one, too.”
“You’ll be the best cowboy alive.”
“Got a minute?”
I look left and see Gage.
I look back at Brandon. “Go take these down to Mom?”
“Yep,” he says then runs down the rest of the driveway.
“Take a walk?” he asks me.
I nod then look down toward Juliana.
“She’s fine. Kat’s claws are back in,” he tells me.
“She was out of line.”
“She needs a fucking leash,” I snarl.
He stops and shakes his head. “Everyone I talk to asks me how I’m doing. Like I have some fucking terminal illness or some shit. It sucks. Not saying it’s right, either, but some actually give a shit how you’re doing.”
“Well, how are you doing?” I ask.
He raises an eyebrow at me.
“I’m serious. This whole fucking thing is a mess, Gage, every part of it. One big, twisted ball of fucking twine.” I throw my hands in the air.
“Jesus, this cowboy shit? It’s no fucking joke, is it?”
I shake my head. “When I wasn’t fucked up, I was busy working like a dog, and it felt good to be so exhausted I passed the fuck out after work, dinner, and a shower. Too busy to worry about who knew what, ‘cause no one did. And—”
“Phoenix overheard some shit last night?”
I look up at him. “She didn’t knock.”
“She was trying to cover—”
“I know. See? Fucking big ball of twine.” I kick at a stone.
“Look, shit happens for a reason. Lots of shit. And as much of a pisspot as my woman is, she’s all fucking heart. She and I chatted, and she thought I should share with you some shit, so I am.
“Juliana was a fucking ice queen.” I start to interrupt when he holds his hand up. “Let me finish. This shit’s not easy for me, okay? Fucking hurts knowing he’s not mine. Hurts bad, too, but this talk with Phoenix opened my fucking eyes. Mags’ little talks opened my fucking eyes. You fucking opened my eyes. Every father who gives a fuck wants what’s best for their kid. In some way, I made you feel like you wouldn’t be a good father.”
“I know now that was all in my—”
He raises his hand. “Garrett, my point here is, I get how fucked up this all was. I get why she was the way she was. Hell, Phoenix was on a head-trip from hell last night because Juliana tried to open the doors of communication with her, and she shut her down. Do I wish she’d have told the fucking truth? Fuck yes, I do. Do I understand some people just don’t have the skills to communicate shit? Hell, look at us; I fucking get it. But it ends now. One hundred percent up fucking front with shit now. And yeah, I’m asking because that boy, he’s mine, too, man.”
