“You had a smart momma. She obviously adored you. How did you put her through hell, though?”
“When I hit high school, word got around that I was ‘martial arts boy’, and every jock, dope, and idiot in between wanted a crack at me. I’d get cornered after school or a few blocks from our house or at lunch, and I was constantly getting suspended for defending myself. People got hurt, which is generally what happens when you fight, so it was easiest to blame the guy without a scratch on him. Luckily for me, my math teacher had some pull and found a way to keep me in school and get passing grades. I just had to fight… for him.”
“What?”
“Yeah, he was a slimy bastard. He knew my mum was pregnant and on complete bed rest and that we needed the money. He organized a few illegal, back-alley fights through the gangs to fill his pockets, and I got half the cut if I won. I was sixteen and fighting grown men. Sometimes, I got beat up pretty bad.”
I caught her eyeing the scar across my cheek. “Oh my God, that’s awful,” she said softly.
“Yeah. Mum kept little packs of ice in the freezer and tried not to cry when she held them to my face. I always told her it would be the last time, but it never was. I trained harder, the fights got bigger, and I started to win more than I lost. Then I met Claude.”
“Claude. The roommate… the one who—?”
“Yeah,” I said quickly to cut her off, not wanting her to finish that sentence.
“I can’t picture you as the fighting type. You don’t seem like you would get angry like that. I’m kinda shocked,” she said quietly.
I reached for her hand to help her over another rough patch, but really I just wanted to hold it. “Honestly, anger was never part of the fighting with me. Claude used to say that was why I was good at it. There was nothing clouding up my head or any emotions getting in the way. But I think that it’s mostly—and this is the only way I can explain it—like everyone around me is moving really slow, and I’m not.”
“Oh, I have heard of that before. That’s amazing.”
“No. It’s weird.”
She stopped and turned to face me. “Is that why Regan and Seth always seem a bit fearful of you?”
I had to laugh. “Seth is a retired cop, so I can’t imagine him being scared of anyone. But Regan? Yeah. That dumb ass decided to test me one night in a bar and picked a fight with the biggest blokes he could find. I had to save his butt. Now he tries to purposely provoke ‘the beast’ so he can study it. He is fascinated.”
“Ha. Makes sense. I can totally picture him with a notepad, jotting down your every move and analyzing—” She stopped mid-sentence. The pain came back and forced her to her knees. I was worried out of my mind.
“Breathe, Kaya,” I said in the calmest voice I could muster and gathered her up into my arms. Marching forward, I dragged my feet, leaving as many clues as I could. Where the hell was Oliver?
“What about your father?” she asked through gritted teeth.
I moved a swiftly as I could without stumbling. “I never knew him,” I said, grateful to set foot on a packed animal trail so I could take longer strides.
“And Louisa’s father?”
“Somebody named Greg, I think. Mum’s boyfriends didn’t usually last longer than three months.”
“So, why the fertility drugs?”
Kaya was scared. I knew talking made her feel better, so I relived my painful past in order to ease her mind. “A few months after Louisa was born, a lying, cheating prick named Mitchell came into our lives. Mum was crazy about him, even though he would disappear for days at a time and be completely strung out when he returned. He promised her his loyalty and said he would marry her if she had his baby, but they couldn’t conceive. Even though she had two kids, Mum was gullible enough to believe him when he said she was the problem. I figure the guy knew he was shooting blanks and blamed it on Mum simply because he had nowhere else to go.”
Kaya winced, and her arm tightened around my neck. “Whoa, sounds like a great guy.”
“Yeah. Stuff started to go missing from the house. I thought it was Mitchell, but then I found out Mum was selling her stuff to buy fertility drugs. Over the course of a year, I watched her turn into a different person—yelling at Louisa, losing her job, and becoming increasingly violent—in the end, she became almost unrecognizable, thin and sickly looking. All her hair fell out, and I thought for sure she had cancer or something. Doctors assured me there was nothing wrong with her. They said it was just stress.”
“But it was the side effects of the Cecalitrin, right?”
“Regan is positive of that.”
A memory of my mum, one that I would happily forget, came to mind. She was standing in front of the bathroom mirror, the lime-green walls casting a sickly hue on her pale face. She was crying and holding handfuls of her black hair. I’d begged her to see another doctor—I had a thousand dollars in my swollen hand, knuckles bleeding from a fight—and for the first time in my life, she yelled at me. I tried to reason with her, but she wouldn’t listen. Instead, she slammed her fists into the mirror and sent shards of glass everywhere. When her yelling turned to bone chilling screams of uncontrollable rage, I took Louisa and ran from the house.
“Luke, how did she die?” Kaya asked softly.
I stopped and looked down at the girl in my arms. Never had I uttered a word of this to anyone. Now, after all this time, I wanted to talk about it. “Mitchell left her. He took all her money and the last shred of her sanity with him. I came home from the gym one day to find Louisa May screaming in her playpen and there was water flooding the hallway. I knocked on the bathroom door—I could hear the tap running, but there was no answer, and I knew… I mean… I just had that sick feeling you get when something is really wrong. So, I kicked in the door, and there she was, in the bathtub, dead. She’d slit her wrists.”
I had to put Kaya down. The memory had made me weak.
“Oh my God, Luke. I’m so sorry.”
“I failed her. I did all the wrong things, got mixed up with all the wrong people. Moved in with Claude, for God’s sake, he was the devil—”
I felt Kaya’s hands on my cheeks. “Hey, you did your best. You can’t feel guilty for that. And besides, you fixed it. You got your sister back. Now you can raise her how you want to. I know your mom would be proud of you for that.” Her hands slid from my cheeks to the gold chain around my neck. I could feel her breath on my chest, and I had to distract myself by looking at the birds, the trees, the aimless clouds hanging listlessly in the blue sky…
“This necklace, was it hers?” she asked.
I nodded and gulped when her fingers brushed my throat. The little, gold maple leaf charm had never left its permanent place around my neck.
“This was my mom’s, too,” she said and patted her silver pendant that had miraculously survived the rapids.
“It’s strange,” I said, brushing her shoulder with my fingertips and watching her cheeks turn pink. “I mean, it’s really pretty, but it’s not some pricy gem that you’d think a gazillionaire like Lenore Lowen would have owned. It looks like the resin we used in industrial arts class in school. That stuff preserved everything. We’d put bugs in it and make key chains, or—”
She took a step back like I’d shoved her.
“What? Did I say something wrong?” I asked.
Her eyes grew wide, and with a gasp, she turned away from me. “Insurance,” she mumbled.
“What? Kaya, I don’t understand—”
“Just… just give me a minute to think.”
She turned away and stared off, the tone of her voice so strange I did exactly as I was told. I waited. I stood so still a squirrel ran over my feet.
“Luke,” she said after a good five minutes had gone by, “I want you to know something.” She faced me now, eyes boring into mine so intensely I wavered under the weight of her gaze. “I promise you that no matter what happens, whatever it takes, I will shut Eronel down. I will make Henry pay for wha
t he did to you and your family. I will do this for you, and Louisa May, and your mom.”
I couldn’t help but smile. Then, I told her to get walking, because all my restraint had crumbled. I guided her along the path—through bushes, over logs and boulders and up hills—and I was barely able to keep it together because in every single way a human could love another human being, I loved her, and I ached with the desire to show her.
“You need to rest, Luke. Put me down,” she demanded.
Brutus brushed up against my legs, as if trying to push me over. I gave in and hit the ground. The pebbles on the riverbed were unexpectedly comfortable, and I stretched out my arms, which felt like spaghetti noodles, as Kaya held a water bottle to my mouth. Brutus panted in my ear.
“Just relax for a sec,” she said.
The sky was intensely blue behind her, and the sun was blinding. I had to close my eyes. Something crawled over my hand, but I didn’t care.
Suddenly, the sound of a shrieking hawk startled me, and I woke up. How much time had passed? Damn it, I’d fallen asleep.
I raised my head up and slowly inched up to position myself onto my elbows. Every muscle ached and screamed at me to lie back down. Kaya was sitting a few feet away, her legs crossed, and she was staring off into the distance. I could see the outline of her face and she seemed slightly on edge, her shoulders rigid and her breath forcibly even. My gun was on her lap—she was protecting me while I slept. Brutus sat next to her, his rear end at my feet, protectively keeping watch over the both of us. The sight made me smile.
“How long was I out?” I asked, making her jump.
“Oh, you startled me. Uh, I dunno. Maybe a half hour?” Judging by the position of the sun, I had slept longer. “You needed the rest,” she added, and then she carefully handed me back the gun.
“What were ya going to do with that?” I asked with a grin.
“Um, maybe hunt some rabbits? Thought I might try Regan’s paella recipe.”
Regan. I didn’t want to tell her that I thought he might be dead. I watched his leg break clean in half, blood flowing out of him like a fountain after he jumped into the rapids to try to rescue her…
“I figured we would have an appetizer first, though,” Kaya said, and she put her jacket, which was covered in leaves and berries, on my lap.
“You must be kidding,” I laughed, pushing thoughts of Regan out of my mind. “Weeds and berries?”
“Not all food is meat, ya know. Just try some, okay? You need the energy.”
“Really, Kaya. You want me to eat flowers?” I sifted through the assortment of yellow petals and pink stems she had shredded into bits and topped with berries.
“Yes—there’s fireweed, dandelions, Saskatoon berries, raspberries—and for dessert, we have this lovely orange goo,” she said as put a little silver packet in my hand. “I found it in my backpack; it’s the last one I have, and it’s a pure protein jolt. I promise it’s all safe. I spent many hours in the bush, being forced to learn about what you can and can’t eat. Had this for dinner many times—still living.”
I hoped she wasn’t unintentionally poisoning me. The leaves were bitter, but the berries were sweet and the orange goo was a nice chaser. I hoped it would give me the energy I needed to get us to Seth. I offered the leftovers to Brutus, but he turned his head away in complete disgust.
“He’s not a fan of your cooking,” I joked.
She giggled, and the dog planted a big, wet dog kiss on her face. I wiped the remaining slobber off her cheek out of reflex.
“Thanks,” she said sweetly. “I’ll admit I didn’t know what to think of him at first,” she said, still petting the dog but looking directly into my eyes, “but he’s not so bad.”
She was referring to me; it was written all over her face. “Yeah, he’s a good ol’ boy,” I agreed. The hawk that had flown over us a short while ago let out another shriek as it circled over us, now joined by another. I pointed up. “Look, it has a friend up there.”
Kaya tilted her head to the sky. “Those are red-tailed hawks. They mate for life,” she said softly.
The birds drifted effortlessly side by side. Although incredible to watch, my focus returned to the beauty beside me. Her dark hair fell in shiny waves, and I imagined it turning grey, her face getting older, her lips still full of that deep red color, and her body a little heavier. I could wake up every morning to that incredible smile. “I can picture the two of us together, forever, like a couple of old birds,” I said absently, and before I could stop myself, I added, “I would happily grow old with you.”
She looked shocked. “The two of us? You and me? Growing old together?” she repeated softly, and everything about her mood changed. The smile left her face, and her eyebrows drew together in concentration. My comment had affected her, and I assumed it was because she saw the future much differently than I did. I desperately wished I could take back what I said, and I wished I didn’t mean it.
We walked in silence now, the sounds of the river growing louder. Soon, we were at the place Kaya had fallen in, and the swollen, broken body of Henry’s guard was caught in a continuous, raging swirl—Regan’s body was nowhere to be seen, and I silently prayed that was a good thing.
Kaya gasped at the gruesome sight and grabbed hold of a willow branch to steady herself. She was about to say something, but the words were left on the tip of her tongue when she doubled over instead, clutching her stomach. I put my hand on her back, feeling helpless as tears streamed down her face. We waited for the pain to quit, but it didn’t. It was dangerous here, and she was so dizzy I pictured her falling in again… so I lifted her into my arms. She looked extremely pale, and her eyes wavered while I moved as fast as I could alongside the rapids, watching my footing on the slippery rocks. She clung to me, her nails digging into my back as her pain grew worse. Even when she said she was better, I didn’t stop. I made it to the falls and turned north, following Seth’s trail while ignoring the burning in my arms and legs. I pushed forward and almost cried when Brutus started wildly barking at a figure coming toward us. Although the afternoon light was fading, I could tell it was Seth.
My knees buckled from the relief that washed over me.
Seth, still in the same clothes from a week ago and with a new scrape on his other cheek, took Kaya from my arms. He led the way to a campfire and a small tent nestled next to a towering expanse of rock. This was it—this was the end of the journey.
My muscles felt like they turned to cooked noodles and I collapsed next to the fire. Seth checked Kaya’s pulse with his filthy hands. “Didn’t think I’d be seeing you two again,” he said.
Thanks for coming back for us, Seth,” I said, catching my breath. Then, I had to ask, even though I was afraid of the answer, “How’s Regan?”
Seth rubbed his forehead. “His leg is broken really bad, he has a concussion, and God knows what else.”
“But he’s not dead…”
“He should be.”
“Why? What happened to him?” Kaya asked.
Seth answered as he ripped open a packet of food for Brutus. “The idiot tried to rescue you by jumping in the rapids. He’s lucky he didn’t splatter himself all over the rocks like that other guy did.”
Kaya’s hand flew to her mouth as she gasped.
“Anyway,” Seth went on, unfazed by her reaction, “I got him out and back to Lisa, and then I came back for you when the storm cleared. Luke… I’m sorry I couldn’t come back for you earlier.”
“You have nothing to be sorry for, Seth. I appreciate everything you’ve done for me.”
Seth cleared his throat and shifted uneasily.
“What?” I asked.
“I saw Louisa May.”
A shiver ran up my spine and Luke gulped.
“She looks good, Luke. I mean, her eyes are distant and she was terrified of me. It’s going to take some time to, well you know… get her back to normal. But she really likes Lisa—won’t let go of her. I think the kid is in t
he absolute best care possible. A female doctor is going to the ranch to check her out today to make sure everything is okay. Lisa stuffed their bedroom with more pink things than you could possibly imagine. I let her run the place for a few weeks, and it has become all girly. It even smells like flowers in there. It’s clean, and the fridge is so packed with food I can’t find my beer.”
“Who’s Lisa?” Kaya asked. “And what Ranch?”
“Ah, Luke never mentioned her? She’s his ex-girlfriend; a feisty young blonde you’ll get to meet at my humble abode soon enough.”
Kaya reached for Seth’s hand, not bothered in the least by the mention of my ex. “You’re a good man, Seth,” she said to him sincerely.
I watched every gruff edge Seth fought so hard to maintain disappear. “Well,” he said, clearing his throat, “we better get you outta here.” He pointed to the top of the towering rock rising up in front of us. “It’s not a long climb, but it’s a bit difficult once you get close to the top. The chopper is up there, and it will be smooth sailing from then on.”
“Chopper, as in helicopter?”
“Yep. That’s the only place in these god forsaken mountains I could land the thing without getting caught up in trees or discovered by your daddy’s posse.”
Kaya nodded her head as Seth opened another pack of food for Brutus.
“You can rest here for a few minutes, and then we have to hit the road. Got it, girlie?” he said.
“Got it,” Kaya answered bravely.
Seth insisted on helping Kaya climb to the top of the ridge. I got stuck helping the dog.
The rocky incline was full of ledges and jagged points for footholds and handholds, which would have been easy enough for a human, but not so much for a four-legged creature with paws. Brutus struggled and fought against me the whole way. I pulled, ignoring the sweat pouring into my eyes and the rope burning my hands. He whimpered when his harness tightened.
“It’s all good, Brutus. We’re just about there,” I told him as I pulled myself up another foot, dragging the two-hundred-pound dog with me.
Serenade Page 28
