by Holly Jacobs
“They eat anything. Definitely rats.”
“You and Colm eat anything, too, but hey, I don’t hold that against you,” she joked. And then laughed at herself.
Liam couldn’t help but join in.
“So front porches and other little things?” At that moment, Liam totally understood because while sitting on the porch with Anna, he was happy. It might seem like nothing, but to him it was a big thing.
She turned and studied him. Curls bounced around her shoulders. And this once, Liam didn’t even try to resist. He reached out and wound one curl around his finger.
Anna froze.
“Speaking of little things, your hair has fascinated me since that first day.”
“It’s not a little thing. It’s a huge animal nest. I can’t control it. I tried cutting it short, but that was even worse. At least some weight settles it a bit.”
“I’m glad you let it grow out again.”
“I…”
A beat-up station wagon pulled into the driveway and a teenaged boy got out with a bag in hand. “You guys order Chinese?”
Liam dropped Anna’s curl and reached for his wallet. He turned back to Anna on the porch. “We could eat out here, if you want to watch the world go by some more.”
“No, I’ve had enough of the world for now. I’d like to spend some time with you—only you and me.” She took the bag in one hand, and his hand in her other and led him inside. Anna closed the door and as they stood in the hallway, she kissed him. “I don’t want any promises of tomorrow, Liam. I’m not looking for an ever-after. I know that in this one moment, I want you. And I think you want me.”
Of all the understatements in the world, this was the biggest. Liam took the bag of take-out from her, set it on the pile of mail and led her up the stairs.
Had she asked for forever, he would have walked away because he knew he didn’t have forever to promise anyone but Colm. Taking care of his brother, that was his forever. But she’d only asked for now…this moment. And that he could give her.
A moment he could give himself.
Maybe that made him selfish, but for once he was going to do something for himself.
Just this one moment for himself and Anna.
THE NEXT MORNING, Anna woke up in Liam’s bed at six feeling confused.
She’d spent the night.
That was something she’d never done before and she wasn’t sure of the protocol. Was she supposed to stay here until Liam woke up? Should she gather her things, tiptoe out and make an escape? Should she go downstairs and make coffee for them both?
She’d told Liam last night that she liked the little things, like sitting on a front porch in the evening.
Well, that’s how she liked her relationships, too. Little. Nothing big and overwhelming. A relationship worked until…well, until it didn’t. She didn’t want anything that could make her lose herself like her mother did with men, time after time. And part of that not losing herself meant never spending a night at someone else’s house.
Until last night.
She glanced at the man sleeping next to her. His brown hair was mussed and he seemed stress-free, which made him look younger. Her hand itched to reach out and brush his hair back from his face. But she didn’t.
She couldn’t lie here all day watching Liam Franklin sleeping, so she rolled slowly away and slipped out of bed. She scanned the floor in search of clothing. She found panties right next to the bed, her jeans were on a chair, and her bra was hanging from the lamp. She didn’t see her shirt and wondered if it was on Liam’s side of the bed, or in the hall. She put on what she’d found and decided to go look for her shirt.
“Are you leaving?” Liam asked lazily from the bed.
Anna stopped in her tracks, feeling very exposed without her shirt on. She knew it was ridiculous, that Liam had seen her in less than this last night, but knowing and feeling are two different things. “I don’t want Aunt Betty and Colm to come back and find me here in the same clothes I wore yesterday.”
“I wish you didn’t have to go.”
“But we both know I do. We don’t want either of them to have unrealistic expectations.”
“About that…”
She leaned over and kissed him. “I don’t have any unrealistic expectations either, Liam. This was what it was. Two people. One night. I’ve always thought relationships will run their course. Right now, this is good. It feels right. But when it stops feeling right, then it stops. No regrets. No recriminations. It will simply be over.”
“I don’t want to lead you on. I have Colm. That means I can never put a relationship first. Most women don’t like that.” He paused and then added, “Aunt Betty warned me about hurting you.”
She kissed him again and realized she wanted nothing more than to pull off what clothes she had on and climb into bed with him. But she’d meant it, she didn’t want Colm walking in and catching them. She felt like a teenager sneaking around.
“Aunt Betty doesn’t need to worry. I’m a big girl and I came to your room last night knowing exactly what I was getting into. You’re not leading me on. Remember last night on the porch when I said I like little things?”
Liam started choking. After a moment he managed to gasp, “I hope you’re not about to tell me that I’m being added to your little-thing list.”
Even after spending a night with him, she knew she was blushing. “No. No. What I meant was, I’m not looking for an epic ever-after love story. I’m looking for something that makes me happy now. When it no longer makes me happy, then it’s over.”
“And right now?”
“You make me very happy.” She glanced at her watch. “But I’m still leaving before anyone else catches us.”
He laughed. “You’ll be back later to work with Colm?”
“Yes, later.”
She found her shirt in the hall, around the corner from Liam’s bedroom. Her socks were on the stairs. She wasn’t going to puzzle about why her socks had been the first thing she took off. Last night it must have made sense to her, but this morning it struck her as odd.
Dressed, she was ready to go. But first she had to get to her car, which had been parked in the driveway all night. That meant everyone in the neighborhood knew she’d spent the night. Anna felt uncomfortable at the thought. Again, she knew it was ridiculous. She was an adult and had every right to sleep over if she wanted. But she still hoped no one would see her as she made her way to her car.
She had her hand on the handle, when Patrick Yu called her name and waved. He was standing on his front porch, his newspaper in hand. “Good morning, Anna.”
She managed a small wave of her own. “Morning, Patrick.”
She opened her car door and slipped in. All she wanted to do was go home and grab a shower.
She didn’t want to speculate on why she felt so guilty about leaving like this.
The walk of shame. She’d read articles on that. Women who left a date the next morning in the same clothes they’d started their date in.
Mixing business with personal matters wasn’t her normal modus operandi, but rather than weigh and measure her decision, she decided to revel in her happiness. Because right now she was very, very happy.
CHAPTER SIX
TWO WEEKS LATER, Anna and Colm stood in the parking lot of Keller’s Market. She found it hard to believe it was already mid-June and that she’d been working with Colm for two months. Her stomach was a mass of butterflies, which was always the case when her clients began traveling on their own.
She reassured herself that she’d prepared Colm as much as anyone could. They’d ridden the bus frequently, and for the last two weeks they’d done the shopping for the house, taking the bus to and from Keller’s. Colm knew the route, and knew that if he got stuck he could ask the bus driver.
She could go over what they’d done a dozen more times, and she knew she’d still be nervous. More nervous than she usually was because Colm had long since stopped being just a clien
t.
He was a friend. A kindred spirit. Someone she truly enjoyed being with, respected, learned from, in fact. He was special, and she knew it.
She shouldn’t have allowed it to happen, but now there was nothing she could do about it. It was done. She couldn’t push him out of her heart any more than she could push Liam away.
There was something rather irresistible about the Franklin brothers.
“Now, you have your cell phone?” she asked.
Colm patted his left jeans pocket. “Check.”
“And your fare?”
This time he patted his right pocket. “Yep.”
“And you remember what you’re going to do?”
“I ride until I get to Main Street, where we got off for the picnic, then I switch and get on the bus to home.”
“And when you get off that bus?”
“I gotta walk for two blocks and cross the brick house’s street.”
“Right. And you remember your address?”
He repeated it back to her, then continued, “And I don’t talk to strangers. I don’t get off the bus with nobody nowhere but at my stop.”
“Right.”
“’Cause most people are nice,” he continued, “but sometimes there are bad ones and nobody can tell from the outside if someone’s nice or bad. It’s the inside that matters. If they got big hearts like me, or little hearts like that guy Bartle who beat up Liam.”
Anna didn’t think Liam realized how badly that incident so many years ago had bothered Colm. Every time they rode a bus, he was reminded of it and mentioned it. And whenever Colm said the name Bartle it sounded like a swear word, which seemed so incongruous with Colm’s easygoing way.
“Right, you can’t tell big hearts from the way someone looks on the outside,” she agreed.
Colm reached out and hugged her. “Don’t worry, Anna. You taught me good. I’m gonna ride this bus, ’cause if I can learn to navible—” he paused.
“Navigate,” she supplied.
He nodded his head vigorously. “Yeah, navigate, then I can do all sort of things, like get a job, right?”
She’d looked around for the perfect position for Colm and had talked to Zac Keller at Keller’s Market a few weeks ago about the possibility. Zac was a nice guy who had made the family-owned grocery store a part of the community in a number of ways. He’d been enthusiastic at the idea of hiring one of Sunrise’s clients. Anna thought Colm would be a good match for Keller’s. He could work at tasks that were well within his abilities, and he’d have a chance to interact with people. That’s why they were trying the first solo trip from this parking lot.
“Right. When you can ride the bus all by yourself, then we’ll think about jobs after we talk to Liam.”
Colm’s smile evaporated, replaced by a worried look. “Will Liam let me?”
She wanted to assure him that Liam would. She thought that Liam would. But they’d yet to talk about it. They’d been getting along so well lately, she’d been hesitant to rock the boat. She was at home with this new Liam—her lover—and she didn’t want to risk taking a step backward and reawakening the man who’d first come to Sunrise.
That made her a coward.
Looking at Colm getting ready to make this huge move of independence, she felt her lack of courage. When they all celebrated Colm’s success tonight, she’d bite the bullet and bring up the idea of Colm and a job.
The Whedon city bus pulled into the grocery-store parking lot.
“Okay, here I go, Anna.” Colm was practically radiating his excitement.
The butterflies in her stomach kicked up a notch. “Now, remember everything we’ve gone over, Colm. I’ll be waiting at your house. If there’s any trouble, you get on your cell phone—”
“And call you. I know, Anna.”
The bus pulled up at the bench and the door swung open. Colm climbed the stairs, reached in his pocket, pulled out his money and dropped it in the box as if he’d been doing it all his life, not merely the last few weeks. Then he chose the first available seat and waved at her through the glass as the bus pulled away.
Anna stood there a few minutes, watching the bus disappear down the street, then she strode to her car, in a hurry to get back to Liam’s. She didn’t want to take any chances and have Colm arrive home before she could get there.
She was surprised to see Liam’s car in the driveway as she pulled in behind him. She thought he’d said he had meetings today.
She shut her car door as he came out onto the porch. He smiled when he spotted her. It was a slow, easy smile that made her heart accelerate.
His smile dimmed a notch as he looked at the car, and then back at her. “Where’s Colm?”
Anna felt a surge of nervousness. “He should be here in a bit. He’s taking the bus.”
“By himself?” The dimming of his smile progressed to an out-and-out frown.
She forced a smile and nodded. “Yes. We’ve been practicing for weeks. He knows what to do.” She tried to offer up the sentence as if Colm riding the bus by himself was the most natural thing in the world.
Liam wasn’t buying it. “How do you practice dealing with jerks? There’s no one to stand up for him if someone hassles him. And what if he gets lost?”
In her mind’s eye, she’d seen Colm announcing his achievement to Liam and Liam glowing with pride on his brother’s behalf. Not this anger. That wasn’t what she’d imagined. She didn’t know what to do with it. She hadn’t dealt with this Liam in a long time. She’d expected resistance at the idea of Colm working, but not about this. Or if she was honest, maybe she had secretly feared just this and that’s why she wanted to present it as a done deal. “I—”
“I trusted you, Anna.”
“Liam, take a breath. This was all outlined in that original paperwork I gave you. We have discussed it a bit. Sunrise’s goals, my goals for Colm are to help him be as independent as possible. There’s a list of criteria a client needs to meet to move on to the next step. Colm met that criteria for a solo bus ride. He can do this. This is why I’m here, to help him do—”
“You are not here to put him in danger.”
“I’m here to help him learn as much as he can. You only need to give him a chance.” She wanted to ask him to give her a chance, but she didn’t. This was about Colm. It had to be about Colm.
The fact that she was dating Liam fuzzied the margins, and not for the first time, she doubted her wisdom in dating a client’s guardian.
She’d thought she could separate her affection for Liam and her job mentoring Colm, but now she wasn’t so sure. With the family of another client, she probably would have given them a heads-up that a next step was coming. But because she was dating Liam, she’d tried not to talk too much about what she was doing with Colm, since there was no way to tell sometimes if Liam was ready for a new level of Colm’s independence.
The fact was, she didn’t want to fight with Liam, period. That made her naive and a coward.
“Let’s sit down,” she said, gesturing to the porch.
Liam scowled, then sat down in one of the lawn chairs.
Anna took the other one. She knew she owed Liam an apology and an explanation. “While we’re waiting, I want to explain—”
“I don’t want explanations and excuses, and I don’t want to make small talk, Anna. I want to wait for my brother.”
Anna didn’t know what to say to him, so she simply replied, “Fine.”
They sat silently, waiting.
Anna checked her watch repeatedly. She should have timed exactly how long the trip should take Colm. Whedon wasn’t that big and she was pretty sure he should have been here by now.
She wouldn’t let Liam’s worry infect her. Colm would be here soon, or he’d call.
“Where is he?” Liam burst out.
She repeated what she’d been thinking. “He’ll be here. He’s perfectly safe, Liam. This is Whedon. Not some big city. It’s not even a small city like Erie. It’s a blink-twice
-and-miss-it sort of town with one traffic light that the mayor installed mainly for show. Colm’s fine. We’ve practiced and he has a cell phone—”
“I’m going to call him,” he pulled out his cell phone. “What’s the number?”
“No,” she said.
“No? You’re seriously not going to give me the number?”
She couldn’t decide if the look he shot her was anger or surprise. He didn’t seem exactly sure, either.
Anna believed it was a mixture of both.
He said, “What if something’s happened to him? You can’t tell me no, Anna. So we’re seeing each other, it doesn’t give you any right over my brother. Colm is ultimately my responsibility.”
“Liam, it’s killing me, too. But Colm needs to do this on his own. If you insist, I’ll give you the number, but I think calling this soon would be a mistake on our parts. Colm needs to learn to trust himself. And that includes making mistakes and correcting them. He knows he’s supposed to call me if he has a problem.”
Liam glanced at his watch. “It’s been too long. He must have had a problem.”
“Maybe. Probably. But don’t go rushing in. He’s so excited about this. And he’s an adult, Liam. For years, no one seemed to remember that. Maybe he functions at a different level than most people, but he needs to do things on his own. That includes making mistakes. I’m not suggesting he learn to drive. I don’t think that’s a possibility. But he can learn the bus system. He can learn to navigate Whedon. He can learn so much, do so much, Liam. You have to give him a chance.” Anna knew what she was really asking—that he trust she was a competent teacher who knew what she was doing.
At least she hoped she knew what she was doing.
She resisted the urge to look at her watch.
“Colm can and should learn.” Liam’s voice was tight, as if he were really working at remaining composed. He was clenching the arms of the lawn chair so tightly that his knuckles were taking on a white tinge. “Things like making his bed or cooking. Those are safe steps toward independence. Maybe my family was wrong all these years and did too much for him, sheltered him too much. But you don’t know what it was like when he was in school. The kids were—”
