Max nibbled at my bottom lip—his way of telling me he wanted more than a reserved kiss. He pushed, I opened my mouth, and the tip of his tongue slowly moved to taste more. His shoulders rose, his hands pressed against my ears, and the echo of our desires filled my head. Now I couldn’t keep my butterflies from coming to life. He sparked a desire low in my groin that vibrated up through my body and caused my hands to seek a way to soothe him. I pressed against him, my hands knotted in his hair, with no idea where we were heading or how far we were going let this go.
Pulling slightly away from my lips Max whispered the words I’d waited to taste for a month: “Wilson, will you make love to me?”
There was a huge part of me that wanted to become one with him, feel him from the inside—our skin meeting, our bodies fitting together like puzzle pieces. But I didn’t want him to know I was afraid. I wanted to feel the ecstasy, but not the pain. Not just the physical pain of my first time, but the fear of not knowing what comes after. So many stupid questions filled my head. Will he go his way as I go mine? Will making love to him bring us closer, or will he be disappointed and pull away? When we go all the way, will I feel as good as I do when we make out? Will he feel how much I love him?
Nevertheless, I capitulated to my hovering state of want. I pulled him down on top of me. Max’s mouth found the edge of my ear and whispered something even better, “Can I make love to you, Wilson?”
He pulled up my shirt, exposing my stomach before he pressed his lips to it and tasted my skin. My butterflies went wild. They shot straight up into my head before diving deep into the apex of my thighs. It felt like my butterflies were fighting to break free from being contained in my body. My heart pounded ferociously in my chest as their wings tickled my insides.
Max looked up at me as he pulled at the top button of my pants. His electric green eyes begged for permission—I didn’t say a word. I just nodded yes.
Max lowered the zipper on my jeans, pulling the front open enough to press his lips just above the waistband of my panties. His warm tongue trailed across to my hip bone, his silky black hair tickled at my stomach. I welcomed him. I wanted him to explore my body; wanted him to feel my heartbeat speed as he tasted my skin. He lifted his body off mine and tangled his arms into the edge of his t-shirt, quickly pulling it off. His gorgeous skin exposed, I rose to touch him. My hands rushed to meet his tight skin. With muscles flexed, he yanked at the base of my shirt, pulling it up above my head until my hands were caught in the twisted fabric. He pushed me back. Locked in my shirt, I couldn’t stop him from touching me, kissing along the edges of my bra. I quivered and my breath got caught low in my throat as I moaned. I wanted to indulge him—touch him, take him, heal him. But mostly I wanted him to know he was going to be okay.
Max’s fingers tickled over my bare skin up to my torso and moved slowly underneath my bra. He seductively dragged it up off my chest, giving him total access to drive me wild. Teasing me, he kissed the curves of my breasts. Slowly he tickled me with the tip of his tongue before he pressed his mouth against my waiting nipple, trapping it between his teeth. My breath quickened, and a fire raged down in my groin. He drove me to the edge of ecstasy before he plucked his mouth away. A chill struck me as the heat evaporated from between my breasts. My insides were turning and twisting, my butterflies hovered low. His hands cased up my arms to the fabric that held my hands hostage. He untangled me and finally I was free to touch him.
Pushing myself up off the bed, my hands dove straight to the button on his Levi’s. I wanted him out of his pants, to feel the heat of his entire body. He pulled away and hopped off the bed, his pants loose around his hips. I wanted them off altogether.
“Mmmm, come here,” Max moaned a low, hot growl as his hands pulled at the air to reign me in. His earthy green eyes drank up every inch of my body. I tangled my hands in my unkempt curls before I released them to fall down over my chest and down to my waist. I hope this is working. I wanted to tease him; to make him want me so badly he would have no choice but to take me. I held my finger to the edge of my mouth, my lips pouted, and that was it. He lunged against me as his hands worked to peel my jeans off. Even my panties fell victim to his desire.
I pressed my hands to his chest and slid them around to the small of his back. I pushed my hand between his Calvin Kleins and the perfect curve of his rear. With my other hand I caught the waistband of his boxers between my fingers and forced them down. They fell to the floor fast, he kicked them off, and we both melted against each other. He was scalding hot as my butterflies’ wings beat frantically against every erogenous zone in my body. I felt my knees buckle and every muscle of his warm body pressed against me where I needed him.
Bringing his lips to mine, he kissed me like I was a drug he craved more than life. His lips tracked across my cheek and down to the curve of my shoulder before he traced the swell of my breast and kissed around my nipple. My back swayed as he picked me up and I felt my body sail through a chilly breeze as he laid me on the bed. With my body burning against his, he inhabited me with his stare, and I let him have me with his mouth. Max was confident with what turned me on; he knew how to bring me to the verge of ignition before he twisted me into the waves of ecstasy. His lips pressed deliciously against the inside of my thigh before his tongue tasted me. I knotted my hands in the sheets. I was drenched in such desire, and I wanted to feel his whole body against mine. I was aching to feel him connect with me in the way we’d already promised each other.
“I want you—” I moaned. I pressed my head into the bed, arched my back, and snatched at his hair. Hot and cold sparked inside my body as his tongue swirled and dabbled against me. He owned me and he knew it. I moaned deeply as his sultry bedroom eyes danced up across my stomach and over my breasts before telling me that he wanted me too.
Max dragged his chest up between my thighs and the pressure of his movement across my pelvis drove me insane. I was ready. My whole body was burning for him. Instinctual motion took over my whole lower half and my hips swayed. Our eyes locked and his smile captivated me. He was the most beautiful person I’d ever looked at in my entire life. He was all I wanted at that moment.
I felt him press his erection against me and I knew he was more than ready. With his body heavy against mine, his muscles flexed as he stretched to his nightstand and pulled at the drawer. His hair fell across his eyes as he looked over at me, and his grin told me what he was doing, as the cool air caressed my body. Slinking back slowly, Max soaked up my entire body with his sexy gaze. He tore open the condom as our eyes remained locked. For a moment, time seemed to stand still as he adeptly unrolled the condom over his erection.
I stretched my hands above my head, feeling my ribs spread, catching my breath. The muscles in my stomach tightened as Max slid his hands along the curves of my hips. His lips planted kisses at every inch between my navel and my mouth. His kisses drank away all my fears. His stomach, firm against the apex of my legs, pushed me closer to the edge with every upward motion. Max’s eyes never left mine.
I relaxed the muscles in my thighs. Words wouldn’t bring any more clarity to our moment. I was telling him with my body that I wanted to be engulfed by him, and I craved to feel him push. I wanted to help him heal. He pulled back and I watched his lips tighten as he tilted his head slightly to let me know he wanted to make love. I felt him push, filling me as my breath caught high in my chest. He stopped, and with his eyes, he asked if he could continue. I instinctively let my knees drop as chills rushed my skin and the heat that was building began to steam to an unbelievable temperature. He thrust his hips a little deeper. I accepted him. My muscles released, and he was perfect. His expression held me captive as he let out a low, lengthy breath. Finally we were one. He pushed further, and all at once, my body knew what to do. I swayed, he moaned, and we were finally experiencing the pinnacle of our reason for waiting. Tears swelled in the corners of my eyes. Our rhythm was slow to begin with, cautiously experiencing something brand new, but then
sped to the beats of our hearts. Each sway and movement of his hips created a swell of sensation that robbed my breath and propelled me further into being his—entirely.
“I love you, Wilson,” Max panted as he began to shudder. The momentum was building as if we were becoming one being. At the same time, a wave of ecstasy broke and crashed between us, causing me to quake and lose my breath. He dropped heavily against my chest and his hands tangled in my hair as he kissed me feverishly. I needed to breathe but welcomed the weight of his body securing me. Eternity could’ve passed us by and I wouldn’t have noticed. The tears that had been collecting in my eyes now flooded over their ledges and across my temples, becoming tickling reminders of what we’d given each other.
I felt Max’s heart slow down, and his breath was refreshing as he kissed dry my tears. His face, ripe with concern, asked whether it was too much at once for me. As he shifted to lay beside me, cold suddenly reclaimed my skin and chills vibrated throughout my body. Max pulled the blanket over us, pulled me tight to his chest, and let his big, muscular leg drape across mine.
“Are you okay?” he whispered across my ear.
I couldn’t say anything; didn’t have words. I didn’t want to bumble like an idiot or cry like a lunatic, so I just nodded my head. I wanted to tell him I was more than okay—that what we did changed me forever—but I couldn’t find the voice to speak.
“I didn’t hurt you, did I?” Concern splashed across his face, like he suddenly realized that was a possibility.
“No, it was perfect,” I choked. I felt the swell of salty tears retrace their paths down the same lines he’d just kissed away.
“Perfect? Really? You don’t think we could practice at getting better?” His voice caressed the butterflies that now lay dormant, worn out, and satisfied. I felt his lips pull into a smile as he pressed his nose across my ear and cleared my tears with his thumbs.
“I never imagined how intense and personal it was going to be, especially with someone I am totally and completely in love with,” I whispered.
“Mmm humm,” he managed, his breath warm against the side of my face, before his body became heavy and his breathing deepened into slow, long, rhythmic breaths. He was at peace—content, secure, and totally with me.
I didn’t want to fall asleep next to him, though. Not only was I still reeling from everything that just happened, I also wanted to watch him and take care of him. My heart pounded and my mind swirled with thoughts of us being together forever. I pressed my ear to his chest and heard his heart beat. It was a rhythm I could get lost in. My eyes closed, and for the first time in my life, I was truly home.
We lay tangled together, our bodies steeping at a comfortable temperature that kept us from moving. Max’s body was my cocoon and I didn’t want anything to disrupt our moment. Still, the muscles in my body wanted to stretch, bend, and move—like a new butterfly just discovering it’s freshly sprung wings.
Upon the sun’s first delicate glimmer Max stirred, stretching his arm and leg over my torso before tucking me tighter under his body. I wanted to live in his arms forever; wanted to listen to his breathing as he held me, consumed in his embrace.
I felt him press into the mattress as he shifted and raised his head to look at me. With me still wrapped in his arms, he smiled and kissed the tip of my nose.
“Mmmm, good morning,” Max said as his voice warmed up to being used.
“Good morning,” I answered.
I loved waking up next to him. His touch protected me and his smell charmed me—even his tone worked to balance me. But I didn’t want to be the one to set the conversation in motion. I was so scared I’d wake up and realize what happened between us last night wasn’t real. And I sure as hell didn’t want to face the reality that he had so much more to deal with than making me feel good about what we did last night. It was perfect. Better than perfect—it was us, untainted and unaware of the world’s judgmental rhetoric about our irresponsibility or thoughtless choices. Last night was so much more than anyone could measure.
Max ran his fingers across his temple as he tugged his hair away from his bottomless, green eyes. I was so caught in his web. He could devour me and there was nothing I would do to stop him. I couldn’t flutter free or escape the trance he had over me.
I felt him lean against me. His lips were soft and scrumptious as we tasted what I’d always known from the first time we kissed—I was his entirely.
He dragged the covers down, slowly exposing me to the room’s temperature. His eyes, thirsty, drank from my body.
“You are unbelievable. Mmmm, I wanna live here with you.” He pressed his lips just above my navel before he slid upward. “And here,” he added as he pressed his mouth against my breast. For that moment the world outside his room didn’t exist.
I felt my body answer his requests. My stomach twirled and crashed down in my groin. My hands pulled at his hair. I wanted to feel him kiss me; to map his way back to my lips with the tip of his tongue.
The sun scorched through the picture window, heating my skin, to match the glow he sparked inside me.
He brushed his lips across my collarbone as he inhaled, pressing his nose against my neck. At last he lined up his body even with mine and I could feel him. He stole my heart and teased my butterflies all at once with his sweet aroma.
“Wilson,” his breath tickled at the curves of my ear. His voice clung to every space in my body that craved him. I knew that he wanted me as much as I wanted him.
“Mmmhum,” I hummed.
“Last night was—incredible. You were incredible, you drove me wild.” He pushed his body tighter against mine and his words spurred flames to dance across my skin.
“Really?” I asked incredulously.
I didn’t mean to question how extraordinary he was last night. What we did was amazingly tender, infinitely thoughtful, emotionally scary, and ever-evolving; but I didn’t know to how to react to his words.
He froze, pulling away just enough to make eye contact with me. “You’re serious? You really don’t know?”
“I guess not. I know how you made me feel last night, and I will never forget it, ever…”
“Well, put it this way—I don’t want to ever have to imagine a moment without you next to me ever again.”
I felt my butterflies pulsate to his words as they stroked their wings deep within me.
“Well, you won’t have to.” I stretched up to taste him, kiss him, and let him know I felt the same way. His lips were hot, his tongue exciting, and his intentions spellbinding. I felt the connections we had last night beginning to rekindle. Pushing himself against me again, his hands traveled across my chest and lingered at the curve of my breasts.
I felt my body give way to what my mind already knew. I loved him. I felt something inside of me click and I was hungry for his touch. I literally craved him. Our bodies began to dance in rhythm again as our mouths found each new desire.
Kisses kept coming from Max as his body curled on top of me and his feet pushed my ankles apart. With his legs in between mine, his hips pressed against the zone where all my butterflies lingered. It was instinctual for me to push in and pull away, stroking every desire that swelled within. I felt his intentions of becoming one with me again when the thought of what we’d done last night flooded my soul—and in an instant, it became something different in my eyes.
God—I’m aching to feel him again. What does that make me? He’s hurting and broken and all I want is to feel him against me. What’s wrong with me? Was it the right choice to make love with him? Was it selfish of me to be with him last night? Were we just using each other to heal all the pain?
“Wilson? Where are you?” Max asked as he caressed my forehead. His eyes were narrow with the same intense stare he’d given me yesterday.
“I’m here with you—but maybe I shouldn’t be.” The words clogged my throat. “Maybe it wasn’t the best time for—God, I was so single-minded—did I really take into account how you—how we
were going to be affected by this?” I wiggled out from under him. I felt like I’d used him; maybe even that we’d used each other. Not that we didn’t love each other or that we weren’t going to make love soon enough, one day. But the night his father died? Did we do it because we loved each other, or was it to heal the gaping hole created by the grim reaper snatching such an important person from his life?
“What are you talking about, Wilson? I don’t understand. Everything that we did last night—our connection and the love we made—was so much more important to me than you know. There was nothing to consider for me. I love you.” He grabbed either side of my head, his hands pressing gently at my ears. “I wanted you to feel how much I love you. Last night, when I made love to you, I wanted to give you that part of me I’ve shut off to everyone else in the world.” His eyes widened as he sat up and turned to sit on the edge of the bed.
A chill rippled through my body when his touch left my cheeks. The sunlight bounced off his bronze skin, but his face was pasty with a loss beyond his realization. Maybe he feels like I used him last night. A moment hung between us before he mumbled words that I didn’t expect. “You weren’t ready and now you regret being with me.” He looked over at me, his frothy green eyes wrecked.
Pain shot across my heart as my mouth ran dry. I’d done it again. In my selfish attempt to justify the fucked-up feelings I had swirling in my head, I’d hurt him.
“I don’t regret being with you.” I bent down in front of him, pushing his hair out of his eyes. “Max, I wanted you so bad and you made me feel so alive, and so important; but was it fair to you? I wanted to fix you, complete you, and make you feel whole again. Even if I couldn’t heal you, I wanted to try. Was it the right thing to do? I don’t know.” My heart was breaking with what I kept doing to him—first with Mallory and now this.
The Wilson Mooney Box Set Page 41
