by Hazel Kelly
I took a sip of my beer and hoped he would keep talking.
“Along with some reported domestic abuse.”
So it was all true. Everything Gemma said. Not that I doubted her, but I suppose part of me didn’t want to believe it. How had she ever let that asshole lay a hand on her? I clenched my jaw and wished I’d hit him harder.
“I still don’t get why he was trashing her car.”
“He’s her ex,” I said. “He was probably doing it because he can’t abuse her anymore.”
“Jesus, really?”
I nodded.
“So why call me to bail you out?”
“What?”
“Well, surely she’s dying to express her gratitude for you coming so valiantly to her aid.”
I sighed. “Not exactly.”
He raised his eyebrows.
I recalled the look on her face when she was trying to guess what my news might be. Why had I gone along with the game? Why hadn’t I just divulged the truth?
“Does she still care about the guy or something?”
“No. I don’t think so.”
“So…?”
“She thought I was someone else, Jimmy. She thought I was her employee. She only found out the truth when I was getting cuffed.”
“What?”
“I was going to tell her,” I said. “I was going to explain everything tonight because I couldn’t keep up the charade any longer. Not when my feelings for her are so real.”
“Do you love her?”
I didn’t answer.
“Have you told her?”
I picked at the label on my beer. “Only recently.”
“Damn.”
I tipped the bottle against my lips.
“I guess I’m not surprised.”
“No?”
He shook his head. “That day I promoted her, I could see it.”
“See what?”
“Why you liked her,” he said. “Why you thought she was so special.”
“Go on.”
“She reminded me of how you used to be.”
“How do you mean?”
“I don’t know,” he said. “She seemed so driven. And so in love with the place. Our conversation felt like the kind you and I used to have in the early days, when we were just getting things going.”
I thought of how she’d been watching Ted Talks on leadership and asking the staff what improvements they thought might benefit the place. It was exciting to see her in action, to watch her inspire those around her with her passion. No wonder the board had seemed so lackluster the last two years. Ambition and vision are supposed to trickle down, not up.
“What do you think she’s going to do when you sell?”
“I’m not going to sell.”
He leaned forward. “What?”
“I’m not going to sell.”
He stared at me through wide eyes. “Really?”
“Really.”
He jumped off the couch and pulled at his own hair. “Are you serious?!”
I leaned back in my chair and prayed I wouldn’t live to regret nodding.
He punched the air and spun in a circle, nearly kicking my glass coffee table. “That’s fantastic news!”
My heart lifted at seeing my best friend so happy, and I hoped the rest of my colleagues would feel the same.
“What made you change your mind?”
“I’m not sure,” I said. “Though I think your stupid experiment had something to do with it.”
His smile broadened.
“I guess it helped me see that we have room for improvement, room to grow. And I see now how we can do it.”
“The team is going to be so excited! How soon are you going to share the news?”
“At the meeting next week,” I said. “As promised.”
He started pacing by the window, his eyes darting back and forth as if they were tracking his racing thoughts.
“Sit down, Jimmy.”
“I can’t. I’m too excited.”
“Please,” I said. “You’re making me nervous. Not to mention celebrating prematurely.”
He froze. “Why? What could go wrong? This is your decision.”
“That may be,” I said. “But I can’t do it alone.”
He scoffed. “You don’t need to worry about that! The whole team is going to back you on this.”
“I don’t doubt that, but I need more than the board behind me.”
His brows came together.
“I need Gemma.”
He shook his head. “I don’t understand.”
“I can’t do it without her.”
“You mean you don’t want to do it without her.”
“Call it what you want,” I said with a shrug. “But if she won’t work with me, the deal’s off.”
T H I R T Y E I G H T
- Gemma -
“We’ll need a final signature from you once this is processed,” the officer explained over the phone.
“Of course,” I said, leaning against the counter. “Is Thursday soon enough?”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said. “Quietest time is before ten. Otherwise, we’re a bit understaffed, so there might be a wait.”
“Okay, thanks.” I glanced over at Jeanie and Tink on the couch, neither of whom had blinked since I took the call.
“Sorry again for the late hour. Have a nice night.”
“Officer—” I said before he could hang up. “Can I ask you one more question?”
“Certainly.”
“The man who came in with Ray… Is he still there?”
“I’m not actually at liberty to give you that information.”
“Really?” I asked, employing my most unabashed puppy dog voice. “Because he works for me, and I need to find someone to cover for him if he won’t be in tomorrow.”
“I see.”
I squeezed my eyes shut.
“Mr. Becker was released on bail earlier this evening.”
A sharp pang pierced my chest at the realization that he hadn’t called. Then again, I’d told him not to. “Thank you, Officer. Have a nice night.”
“Well?” Jeanie asked as soon as I set the phone down.
“They finally have enough evidence to process my restraining order against Ray.”
“It’s about damn time.”
I slumped on the couch beside her.
“Why don’t you seem happier about it?”
“I know this is going to sound crazy,” I said, tucking my feet under me. “But Ray feels like the least of my problems right now.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Alex has been lying to me,” I said, scratching Tink behind the ear. “I just found out today.”
Her face paled. “Lying? About what?”
“About who he is.”
“I don’t understand.”
“That makes two of us.”
“Come here,” she said, throwing the end of her blanket over my legs.
“He’s been playing me for a fool since day one.”
“We’re talking about the same guy, right? The guy who’s been staying over every night and telling you he loves you every day? The guy who fucking tackled Ray in the Pump parking lot like an animal today?”
“That’s the one.” I could still hear the smack of his knuckles against Ray’s jaw. “He owns Pump.”
“What?”
“He’s my boss.”
She squinted at me. “Wait, but I thought—”
“I’m not his boss at all. It was a big hoax.”
“That doesn’t make any sense.”
“I know.”
Her brow furrowed. “Why would he pretend to be someone he’s not?”
“I don’t know.” I smoothed her blanket over my thighs. “But if he’d lie about that, how could I possibly believe his feelings for me were genuine?”
Her almond eyes drooped at the corners.
“Not to mention my recent promotion,” I said. “I me
an, did I get promoted because I deserved it or because I was unknowingly fucking my boss?”
She flinched. “So he’s your boss?”
“He’s everybody’s boss.”
“Wow.”
“I know.”
She raised a hand to her cheek. “So he owns a bunch of gyms but still drives a Panda?”
“It’s his mom’s car.”
“I thought you met his mom?”
“I did.”
“Did she know he was lying to you?”
I exhaled. “Who knows? She didn’t strike me as a scam artist, but then again, neither did her son.”
“So now what?”
I shrugged. “I guess I keep going to work and try to forget what a fool he’s made out of me.”
“I’m sure that wasn’t his intention.”
“Doesn’t matter. Doesn’t change anything.” I ran a hand through my hair. “No wonder we never went to his place.”
“I’m sorry, Gemma.”
“How am I supposed to face my staff tomorrow and explain that we’ve all been duped?”
“Is that really necessary?” she asked. “I thought you said most of them had already gone home.”
“Yeah, but I can’t expect them to keep secrets from each other. They won’t. And they shouldn’t have to.”
“What about Alex?”
“What about him?”
“Have you talked to him since he got arrested?”
“What would be the point?” I asked.
“I’d want an explanation if I were you.”
I shook my head. “I don’t know if I’m up for a bunch of bogus bullshit about why he thought it was okay to fuck me and lie to me at the same time. Like, the old me would give him another chance, but I don’t want to be that girl anymore. I’m sick of being a sucker. Of getting burned like this.”
“Mmm.”
“That’s all you’ve got for me?”
She hugged a patterned pillow to her chest. “I don’t know what you want me to say. He seemed crazy about you, and you seemed…”
“What?”
“Happier than you’ve been in a long time.”
“It was all a lie, though.”
“Your feelings weren’t a lie.”
“My feelings were based on lies,” I said. “Besides, I knew something was off in my gut. That’s why I’ve been holding back with him.”
She laughed.
I glared at her.
“Sorry—I just—if that was you holding back…we share a wall, Gemma. I’m not buying it.”
My cheeks burned. “So I wasn’t holding back physically. That’s not what I meant.”
She scoffed.
“Jeanie! What the hell?”
“What?”
“Whose side are you on?” I asked, my voice reaching a high pitch. “The guy’s been taking advantage of me for weeks!”
She rolled her eyes. “Excuse me for not seeing it that way.”
“What?! What other way is there to see it?”
“Well, compared to your ex he’s been a goddamn prince.”
“But it was a farce!”
“The way he looked at you wasn’t a farce.”
I crossed my arms and thought about how it felt to have his eyes on me. “You don’t know that.”
“Neither do you.”
“You don’t systematically deceive someone if you actually love them.”
“Oh please,” she said. “What do you think dating is?”
My neck hinged forward.
“Because unless everyone I know has been doing it wrong, systematic deceit for personal gain is as good a definition as any.”
“How romantic.”
“Think about it,” she said. “Are we not all just pretending to be versions of ourselves we hope the other person will fall for?”
“That’s not the same as pretending to be someone—or something—you’re not. He took it too far.”
“If you say so.”
My fingers found my temples. “I can’t believe I’m hearing this! How can you possibly think this is okay?”
“I didn’t say I thought it was okay. I said I would give him a chance to explain himself.”
I groaned.
“What else are you going to do? Avoid him? If he’s actually your boss, I can’t recommend the whole woman scorned tantrum angle.”
“I’m not throwing a tantrum.”
“You’re not exactly showing gratitude for what he did today either.”
“Gratitude?! For embarrassing me in front of my staff? For thinking it’s okay to screw me and deceive me at the same time?”
“I didn’t hear any complaints through the wall last night.”
“Because I didn’t know then!”
“What’s the big deal? You thought it was okay for him to fuck his boss? Why isn’t it okay for you?”
“Absolutely not,” I said. “He’s embarrassed me enough. If you think I’m going to spread my legs for him again after—”
Her thin eyebrows crept up to her hairline.
“Forget it.” I was so frustrated I wanted to scream.
“Well, I liked him,” she said. “And I’m not sure I can hate him for being more successful than I thought he was.”
I thought of my mom and her split personalities, of her declarations of love that weren’t worth shit. They were nothing more than a shiny distraction. Just as Alex’s had been.
“You did say he seemed too good to be true.”
“I did, didn’t I?” I stared down at my lap where my hands were holding each other. “Being right is so overrated.”
F L A S H B A C K
- Gemma -
I was writing a letter to my dad when I heard a “pssst” at the open door.
“Gemma,” a familiar voice hissed.
I looked over my shoulder as the silhouette stepped into the dim cabin. “You’re not allowed to be in here,” I said, looking around to confirm that my other bunkmates were out.
“There’s something I want to show you.”
“I’m in the middle of something.”
“That can wait,” he said, gesturing for me to follow. “Come on. This is a time-sensitive matter.”
I shoved the half-written letter under my pillow. “What is it?”
“Hurry up,” he said, scuffling back outside.
“Wait up!” I said, chasing him along the woodchip-covered path. “Aren’t you supposed to be playing basketball right now? Or am I confused about what day it is again?”
“Stop asking so many questions,” he said, grabbing my hand and picking up the pace.
I let him drag me down the path towards the lake, my eyes darting over my shoulder every time he looked back. “You’re acting very suspicious,” I said, wondering what the heck he was up to and whether or not I was flattered that he dragged me along.
He offered no explanation but continued along the bank towards the narrow dock beside the boathouse, which creaked when he stepped on it.
“We’re trespassing,” I whispered, eyeing the dirty windows of the rickety shed, which looked positively haunted. Granted, I was too old to believe the stories I’d heard about the old troll who lived in the boathouse and ate toads at night, but my imagination was active enough to believe the stories must’ve been based on something… Especially since simply looking at the structure gave me the creeps.
“There’s no one here,” he said. “I’ve been casing the place for days.”
“Casing the place? Can you hear yourself?”
He pulled a worn rope until a shallow metal boat emerged from the weeds.
“If you think I’m going to—”
“Get in,” he said, taking the words right out of my mouth.
“Absolutely not.”
“Did you have something better to do?”
I thought of the letter I’d been writing. How I’d been in the middle of telling my dad camp was boring and that I didn’t want to come back next year.
> “Well, don’t just stand there,” he said, hopping in and lifting the oars from the bottom. “Either get in or give me a push.”
“Where are you going?” I asked, looking over his head past the reeds. The blue lake shone in the sun and the still waters reflected the tall pines along the shore.
“It’s a lake, Gemma. Options are limited on the adventure front.”
I groaned and lowered myself down so I could sit on the creaky planks and slink into the boat carefully. When I looked up, Alex had a big smile on his face that almost made me feel better about the situation. “You know we’ll get in big trouble if we get caught.”
He ignored me and stood up, widening his stance before pressing the end of one oar against the dock to give us a steady push.
I squinted up at his silhouette in front of the bright sky and watched the lean muscles in his arms flex as he navigated through the reeds.
He didn’t sit down again until we were surrounded by sparkling lake, the warm sun beating down on our bare skin.
“Now what?” I asked, as we floated away from the shore.
“What do you mean, now what?” he asked, leaning forward and back as he pulled the wooden oars through the water.
“Is this it?”
“Jesus, you’re hard to impress.”
I squinted at him. “Sorry. I didn’t realize you were trying to impress me.”
“Why else would I rescue you from a dark dungeon and steal you away in an old troll’s boat?”
I smiled.
He flashed his eyebrows.
“Because you hate basketball?”
“I don’t hate basketball,” he said. “I hate being told what to do. I hate being told that I’m supposed to enjoy basketball between certain hours on certain days with certain people.”
“What would you rather be doing?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” he asked. “This. With you.”
“Glad I could make your dreams come true.”
His cheeks flushed, and he tore his eyes from mine to concentrate on his rowing again. “Sometimes I feel like we’re the only people around here that make any sense.”
“I know what you mean.”
“I can’t tell if it’s because you’re special or if it’s because everyone else here just sucks so bad,” he said, his eyes on the ripples the paddles were making.
“Maybe it’s both,” I said, confused as to whether he meant that as a compliment.
