by Chula Stone
“You’re not always careful. You daydream like a schoolgirl in spring.”
Treli shrugged. “I get bored. Daydreams pass the time.”
“You were daydreaming in a circus?” he asked incredulously.
Treli gave him a disapproving look. “I’m not always inattentive. Sometimes I’m overly attentive. I get too interested in things that have caught my eye. Too curious for my own good, I suppose. I just have to see for myself.”
“Is that what happened to your leg? Did you get too curious?”
“You heard about the elephant?”
“Elephant?” Shep’s head and upper body appeared, almost upside down. “I just heard your leg was broken when you came here. I didn’t know it was an elephant. How did it happen?”
“I got in the enclosure with the mama elephant and her baby. I just wanted to check and make sure they were okay.”
“And nobody warned you not to?”
“They didn’t think they had to. I should have known. I grew up around them all my life and I should have known better. Just one lapse in concentration and… crack went my leg.”
“It takes a big person to admit they were wrong,” he said simply. There was neither pity in his tone, nor condescension. In fact, he gave her a wide grin before his head disappeared again. “I should have known you wouldn’t blame anyone else. You certainly haven’t ever let me get away with anything while I’ve known you. Glad to see you apply those same standards to yourself.”
“I try. It’s only fair.”
“That’s one of the things I like best about you. You don’t quibble. You face things head on and you’re not afraid.”
“Me? Not afraid? Coming from you, that’s quite a statement. You must have seen your share of things to be afraid of in the Army.”
“I did. But being afraid doesn’t do much good, unless it makes you cautious. That’s the only good kind of fear. The healthy fear that makes a man show good sense. Or a girl, either. Like with the animals. Maybe respect is a better word than fear.”
“And learning about a thing is important, too. If you know about something, you’re not as afraid of it and you can figure better how to treat it. Like those alpacas you brought. You knew them better than me. I should have listened to you about how to treat them. If I had known them, it would have been safer for me to see them.”
“So, that’s why you like to learn about things.”
“Don’t you?”
“Sure, I do. That’s a big part of the reason I joined the Army. Traveling all around the country teaches a man plenty.”
“I’m sure it does.” Had she heard a note of sadness in his voice? It was hard to tell with him up on the roof. “And not all of it pleasant to recall, I suppose.”
“Not all of it fit for the fairer sex to hear.”
“Being the fairer sex doesn’t mean I’m squeamish,” Treli countered. “I’ve seen plenty myself, traveling with the circus.”
“But you shouldn’t have to see the ugly things in life.” Once more his head peered over the side of the roof. “That’s a man’s job: to shield the women in his life from the meanness of the world.”
Treli filled the basket with shingles. “It’s a sweet thought, but it’s not possible. The meanness is out there, whether a girl sees it or not. And if she doesn’t know about it, she can get in more trouble than if she has her eyes open. Like my mistake with that Bailey Branson fellow. I forgot how in town people’s connections can be important in ways that aren’t obvious. I almost got Betty in trouble, mostly because I didn’t know about that particular kind of meanness in this town. Now, I wouldn’t have made that kind of mistake in a caravan.”
“I imagine that’s true. I might be the one making a big gaff if I tried to live the traveling life like that.” With a shrug, Shep pulled the basket up.
“Somehow, I doubt you’d ever get a lady into danger, in town or in a caravan.”
“I hope not!” he shot back.
Treli held her lapel watch under the lantern. How late it was. She would regret this in the morning, but right now she knew she wouldn’t sleep a wink, even if she went home. Talking with Shep made her feel too alive to allow for slumber. “I can’t see you in a caravan at all, actually.”
“Me, neither. I’m a bit too tall to live in a wagon, I guess. What about you? Are you planning to go back to that life?” Shep’s voice paused for a long time before he continued. “Or are you thinking to settle down here?”
Funny how the answer to that question had never seemed clearer to her than it did at that moment. “I can’t see myself going back to the circus. I like Merriview too much. I love living in town, in an actual building, having one place to call home every night, watching the seasons change and learning about the people here. More than just their names and a few other facts so as to get their confidence and thus more of their money. I like the fact that they know me, too.” What was that noise? Had Shep said something? “What was that?”
Shep cleared his throat. “Good. I just said, ‘good.’ It is good. I’m glad you’re not planning to leave.” His hand was all she saw this time when the little basket dropped down to her.
“Would you worry about me if I left?” Treli couldn’t resist teasing him, but she was interested in his answer nonetheless. She took her time refilling the basket, hoping he would grow impatient and look over the side at her, but he stayed resolutely hidden.
“I would indeed. But maybe not as long as you’d think, because I’d be trailing along behind you as soon as I could manage.”
“You would?” The basket disappeared again up onto the cottage roof and Treli heard hammering, though whether it was Shep’s hand or her heart, she couldn’t be sure.
“If it was attractive enough to beckon you back, I’d have to find out why you thought so. And to make sure you were happy. I’d just have to trust that you’d help me learn my way around and avoid making any errors that would bring trouble on the camp.”
Treli pushed her hair out of her face. She knew she would look a sight after tramping around in the dark all night. “You’d never bring trouble anywhere. You’re too careful.”
“Not always. I’ve been careless in one thing at least.” The basket fell to the ground, the rope still attached. Apparently, he was done for the night. “I seem to have let down my guard and lost something.”
“And what would that be?” Treli picked up the empty basket and put it on the cart that held several other tools and a small cask of nails.
“My heart. A mere slip of a girl has it now and I don’t think there’s anything I can do about it.”
Treli could hardly believe her ears. “Where is all this coming from?”
“What?” Shep climbed down the sloping roof to the edge near the ladder. Slipping his hammer into his belt, he scrambled down to her. “The concern for your welfare? I’ve always had that.”
Treli had to tip her face up to look him in the eye, but she didn’t back down, even when he stood toe to toe with her in the gathering gloom. The moon was setting and the lantern’s light stood out the brighter because of it. “Concern for my welfare or for your own pride?”
“I’ve got nothing against your pride. You have quite a bit to be proud of. Didn’t I defend that right at the festival the other day?”
“I’ll give you that,” she conceded slowly. “But you have to admit you… take over. You tell me what to do.”
“When you’re about to do something foolish or dangerous. But maybe you’d rather have a man like Eli. Someone you can boss around, who doesn’t know how to look out for you. Do you want to run the show?
Treli’s heart was racing. He was too close, too strong, too… male. She did take a step backward, only to find she could retreat no further than that. Her back was up against his cart. “I could.”
“That’s not what I asked. Sure, you could. But do you want to?” He reached out a hand and curved it gently around her jaw. His fingers reached just behind her ear and the war
mth that flowed through her seemed to sear her soul. “Do you want to be alone forever?”
Searching her heart, Treli found that she didn’t. Struggling to keep her thoughts clearly in line, she took a deep breath. “No, but is that my only choice? Loneliness or servitude?”
He gave her a ‘you know better than that’ look, with one eyebrow raised and his lips pursed. The mood relaxed and he drew back. “Servitude? Treli, if you call what I want for you ‘servitude’ then maybe you don’t know what the word means.”
Actually, she did know. She’d seen it often enough before. “All right. I admit, that was an exaggeration. But my point remains.”
The air seemed to thicken again. How could he make her breath slow to a dragging walk while her heart began to canter? All with a look, a slight tightening of his hand on the back of her head and a quirk of his lips. “What is it you object to? The security? The protection? The concern? Yes, I guess when it comes to the woman who will belong to me, it will come down to a question like that. Being alone or being cherished. I don’t know any other way. Because I’ll belong to her, too. Heart and soul. I’ll love her more than life itself and she’ll have every bit of me. I’ll have to protect her.”
“The man I love won’t have it easy,” she admitted doubtfully. “I won’t back down from a fight.”
“A brave man wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“And I won’t slow down for anything.”
“A strong man can handle speed.”
In words as delicate as raindrops, she voiced her deepest fear. “But I’m not as hard as I seem.”
“A smart man has a gentle hand.” He used that hand to caress her hair, bringing her face closer to his. He bent down to bring them closer still.
She could feel his breath on her lips. “So I see. And are you all those things?”
“That’s for you to say, little one.” His arms slipped around her and he brushed his lips against hers.
Her eyes opened wide and she stiffened. “Shep!”
He gave her a skeptical look. “Don’t tell me you didn’t know that’s where this train was headed.”
“No, but we reached the destination a little earlier than I expected.”
“Not early enough for me.” He kissed her in earnest then. First a tickle, then a grip, then a drag as he claimed her mouth with his.
She felt the situation getting away from her only once his hand had wandered to a forbidden spot. Until that point, she was happy to let the feelings he was causing take her to grand new places. His kiss wasn’t like the awkward explorations of innocent youths she had encountered before. He obviously knew what he was doing, in this department at least. The problem was, she knew that he shouldn’t be doing it. At least not yet. And not out here in the open, with dawn coming. She broke the kiss and pushed him away. “What was that about a smart man?”
He didn’t resist her hands as she increased the distance between them. It was almost as if he were grateful that she had the will-power to put on the brakes. With a shrug she could only describe as sheepishly content, he answered, “He knows that when it comes to reining in a thoroughbred, a touch is better than a yank, but given the chance to prove the point, he won’t turn it down.”
“Is it really getting light? I can see your face more clearly now.” She looked around at the trees that were turning from their nighttime gray and black to shades of grey tinged with their actual green.
“I don’t need the light to see your face. I know its every line by heart.” He touched her again, as if he wanted to repeat his earlier performance.
She knew it was time to close up the tent and go home, so she slid away and struck out for the path, expecting him to mount his cart. Instead, he came up beside her and put an arm around her waist. “This path gets slick when it’s wet.”
“It’s summer. We haven’t had rain in days,” she pointed out saucily.
“There could be dew. You never know,” he countered with equal playfulness. He tightened his grip. “Do you really object?”
For an answer, she relaxed her pace and let him help her. She found she reached the top of the hill much more easily than she had reached the bottom.
It was still dark enough when they arrived at the back yard of the boarding house that she felt safe in letting him walk her right up to the fence, but there she stopped him. “If I’m seen with you at this hour, I’ll be put out of the house. Aunt Mina doesn’t tolerate gentleman visitors at the back door.”
“I’ll be sure to call at the front door tonight then.”
“Oh, no! I’ll meet you down at the house, like tonight.
“I was talking about calling on you for a social visit. I don’t want you running away with the idea that I usually court a lady by meeting her in the dead of night. Shingles are not my favorite present to bring a girl, either.”
Treli shrugged. “That’ll wait. We’ve got to get that roof done before the rain comes. You are going to work on it tomorrow, aren’t you?”
Shep’s lips curved into a teasing grin. “It’s possible, but I’m thinking it’s going to rain. Has your trick knee been giving you any hints?”
“Oh, that! Never mind that. Anyway, if doesn’t rain then we can go down.”
“Sure. I’ll pick you up, but you wait for me here.”
“You can’t come in at that hour.”
“I’ll be waiting at the foot of the tree.”
“Ummm. What tree would that be?”
“Are you trying to tell me you flew down to the ground?”
“No, all right. At the foot of the tree.”
“I’ll see you then.”
But the next night a slight mist was still falling. Treli was in a slicker and was surprised to see that he wasn’t. “Don’t you have a slicker? Go back and get it.”
“I won’t be needing it. We’re not going, of course. I told you.”
“Why not?”
“See all this wet stuff falling from the sky? It’s called rain.”
“It’s not that much.”
“But the roof will be slippery. And anyway, the trail will be too treacherous and muddy to be used safely.”
“But it’s close to time. Pinkie wants to take Vince there for their anniversary. I’m going down to keep the kids. It’ll be perfect.”
“I’m sorry, but we just can’t go. Maybe tomorrow night. It should clear up by then.”
“I don’t see why you’re being so bull-headed about this.”
“Me, bull-headed? Look, Treli, I’ll finish it up as soon as the weather clears. It was nice having your help, but I can do it on my own. You shouldn’t have kicked me out so soon this evening.” He sidled up closer to her. “I wanted to see more of Aunt Mina’s albums. I had no idea your circus was so famous.”
“Aunt Mina and her newspaper clippings!” Treli laughed. It had been fun, sitting there with him. Telling stories of funny things that happened on the road made her appreciate all the more the life she now lived. Traveling all the time had been hard.
“I’ll see more of them tomorrow evening.”
Treli took a step back into the shadows, still put out that he wasn’t listening to her arguments. “I might be busy.”
“Too busy for the first of the alpaca wool? It’s been washed and dyed to Drina’s satisfaction, so by tomorrow the color should be set enough for you to spin it into thread for her.”
Treli almost clapped her hands in glee, but remembered just in time that she didn’t want to waken the house. It wasn’t that late, but still not an hour for a normal social call. “All right! You can bring that by.”
“See you then,” he promised.
She was a bit disappointed that he didn’t try to kiss her goodnight. Of course when he had left earlier, they had been under the watchful eye of Aunt Mina, with the other girls probably watching from their windows, but now, they were alone. She had expected him to try again. She hadn’t been planning to push him away too quickly. “See you.” But instead of hop
ping the fence to leave, he just stood there, looking at her. “Is something wrong?”
“I was trying to see if I could get my property back from you, but I can’t. You stole my heart and you’ve still got it. I’m thinking I need something in exchange.”
“Like what?”
“Something pretty valuable. Very valuable, in fact.”
“Such as?”
“Your promise.”
“Promise of what?”
“That you won’t see any other men. I know they come in the café and you have to serve them, but I want your word that I’m your only beau.”
“You’ve only come calling once. Isn’t this a bit quick?”
“We’ve known each other for months. All that time wasted fighting! This is how you can make it up to me.”
She thought about it a moment and realized he had a point. She had wasted the whole summer insulting and resenting him. “All right. I promise.”
“And a good promise is sealed.” He stuck out his hand, but when she reached out to shake it, he pulled her close. “Like this.” He ducked his head and before she realized what he intended, captured her mouth in another kiss. It went from sweet to searing in seconds. The flush seemed to melt her bones. And then he was gone, leaving her wondering what she was getting herself into.
The problem was, of course, that his words and yes, if she were honest with herself, that kiss left her sleepless and restless, too. Why not go ahead and show him that they could work on the roof. The conditions weren’t that bad. Down the trail she slithered, sometimes holding on to tree limbs with both hands, other times sliding down on her slicker, thanking heaven she had worn her oldest skirt. It was already mud brown and no one would notice a few more stains.
She had no trouble collecting the things she would need to move the repair along. Her hope was to make some significant progress without being too obvious. Surely he hadn’t memorized where he had left off. She found the shingles and nails concealed neatly under a corner of the house behind some cane poles that must have at once point been used for scaffolding. Maybe he was planning to use them again since the ladder was nowhere to be seen. She made do as best she could and managed to wind up on the roof with enough materials to keep her occupied for several hours. It felt good to be making progress.
