She felt then, she felt in her blood, coursing through her as she came with his frenzy. She let the aftershocks run through her as the vibration still pulsed, and he was scrabbling under her.
“Shit, turn it off, it’s too much.” He raised them off the floor and he let out a deep desperate noise.
She reached between them, and managed to turn it off.
She sank back on him and lay over his front. His skin was hot and sweaty. He panted hard as he struggled to catch his breath.
“That was amazing.”
“Fuck, you broke me.” He panted the words, and she could feel his heart pounding.
“Pussy.”
He laughed, and looked at her. “Pussy huh? Trying to provoke me?”
“Yes. I’m not done with you.”
He raised a brow and wet his lips. She pulled off him and went to the bathroom. He lay back and took a deep breath before pulling the ring off. Who’d have thought that it would feel so good?
He cleaned it when he cleaned himself up. Suzy was lying on her front with her wine singing along to the music in their little nest. He caged her gently, kissing his way up the back of her legs.
“May I worship you?”
“You may.” She was laughing as she said it. He halted at her bottom, and kissed and nipped her cheek.
“You have a dimple of your own you know.”
“What?” she twisted round, alarmed, “have I got cellulite?”
“No, you haven’t, but, let me say this, I wouldn’t care if you did. I don’t give a fuck about cellulite, it’s…womanly is the closest word I can think of, but it’s not quite right. But you don’t, no this is new. You’re much fitter than you were, and were the muscle changes, or what, I don’t know, you have the sexiest little dimple. It’s so fucking hot, I want to tongue it for hours.” He nipped and sucked and kissed it.
“That’s how I feel about yours. How about a little sharing?” she arched her bottom into him, and he hummed and squeezed before answering.
“What kind of sharing?”
“You want to know, and don’t pretend you don’t know what I mean.”
“Okay, I want to know.” Between his words, he continued to kiss and caress her bottom and legs.
“I slept with her, and another man at a party once. I was very, very drunk.”
“Was it good?”
“At the time I thought so. But this, what we have, is more fun, and the love I have for you, makes everything so much better.”
Nathan couldn’t speak, he watched as she shifted onto her back, propped up by cushions. She sipped her wine. “Tell me something you’ve done.”
“I had a threesome too.”
“No way.” She pushed him with her foot. He kissed the inside of her thigh.
“Two women who were friends, pulled me. I was in Birmingham. It was weird.”
“Why?”
“It was the moment when I realised that sex for sport wasn’t what I wanted. It was ridiculous.” She raised her brows for him to explain, and he sat up, and drank from his glass. “I…you don’t really want to hear this?”
“I do.”
“I wanted to laugh at the time, we were in the middle this bizarre situation, and I had no idea why I was doing it. I managed to finish the once, and they expected me to carry on with the other, and I bolted.”
“You left one girl disappointed, for shame.”
“They weren’t unsatisfied.” He blushed, “it crossed a line I think, it was so far away from who I was. Skinny, quiet geeky boy who liked maths, with eczema on his face and smelt like emollient. I’m not the guy women throw themselves at, until I was, it was…”
“Intoxicating. A high.”
“Yes. I was completely seduced by it. Then it felt…cheap.”
“My ‘wild’ phase never really ended. It would come and go in fits and starts. I’d be afraid and reserved one minute, and the next I couldn’t bear it and I had to just go for it.”
“What’s the wildest thing you have ever done?” she pulled her lips into her mouth. He poured them more wine. “That face tells me I have to know.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Totally honesty you said.”
“You’ll be shocked.”
“Try me.”
“I had sex with someone while someone else watched.” She sipped her wine.
“Did you like that?”
“Not really, he was totally into it, I just went along with it. He wasn’t very good, too concerned about how it looked.”
“There’s more, I know your face.”
She cleared her throat. “I had sex with the guy who watched later on.” She gulped her wine.
“And did you like that?”
“He was better. I remember getting into the taxi in the morning and crying the whole way home. I pulled back from those people then. People from Passion House, their crowd, were into a lot more than that, it was a bit too much for me. I mean I still saw them every now and again, and I’m still friendly, but it was so empty and unfulfilling, but it makes them happy, I’m not anyone to judge them for it, it’s just not me.
“So I’d check a guy out for a bit, look into him, weigh it up, and have some fun. Scratching that itch.”
Nathan nodded.
They were a quiet for a bit, as they cuddled up together.
“Is there anything that you want to do? I mean anything weird.”
She smiled as she looked up and him, she kissed the spot above the nape of his neck making him moan. “That’s not weird, that’s incredibly good.”
She laughed as she moved down to his nipples. He was hard again.
“I don’t want weird, I want to make love to you.”
“You can do anything with me.” He pulled her back up to him and kissed her. The more they were together, the stronger the connection felt, it was the hot frenzied need that they both craved, free of inhibition, free of fear, neither judged the other.
They were both liberated, but bound with the emotion they felt, with the love.
He pulled one of the cushions down, and positioned her hips over it, as she lay down, he eased inside her, and showed her exactly how he felt.
Nineteen. Onward bound
Nathan woke up, still lying on Suzy’s floor, she was half draped over him. It was dark, but a light crept through the French window, he could make out every curve of her body.
He smiled. They had made love, and then some. He stroked her hair from her face. He had a sated peace when he was with her.
He felt teeth graze his nipple.
“Hey, what are you doing?”
“Making up for lost time. “
He laughed. “We have a lot to make up for, and life is short. I’ve been thinking.”
“Oh God.”
“When you leave Hulstons, you have a few days before you start your new job.”
“A week.”
“I told Townslee I’ll need a few days to work things out, he gave me a long weekend when I’m ready. We should coincide that, I’d like you to come with me, if you want that is, and meet my parents.”
“What?”
“If you’re not ready for that, I’ll understand.”
“I want to go, you don’t know how many times I’ve thought how I’d do it all different. Yes, I’ll go with you. Do you want to come with me to Amy’s on Sunday, my dad will be there.”
“I’d love to.”
It wasn’t ten. “I’m starving.”
“I’m not cooking. Chinese?”
Nathan was a little nervous when they got to Amy’s house on Sunday. Watching Suzy hug her sister and her dad made Nathan extremely happy. Shaking hands with them, being welcomed into her family was right, everything was right.
They ate and chatted, the comforting smell of a Sunday lunch, and the good company of family that came with it set Nathan at ease, the only pang he felt was seeing Suzy with her niece, the sweet toddler was precocious, and Suzy adored her. She’d never have tha
t, not of her own. Suzy caught the look on his face, the sadness of it. She gave him a reassuring smile, it’s okay it said, I’m okay.
They had agreed not to tell anyone at work, except Mia and Poppy, they already knew most of it, by the time it came to Suzy leaving, everything was pretty smooth for the handover. Suzy had a cake, a good fruitcake. She was given a crystal vase and even Townslee came up to say goodbye and wished all the best. Everyone went to the pub, and this time, Nathan sat with her, and people slowly caught on that they were a couple. There were a few sly grins, but everyone wished them well.
Suzy was a little tipsy by the time Nathan pulled her along to his car, as they had driven in together. She’d been eyeing him all night, much to his amusement.
She kissed him when he was in the car, a long sensual kiss. He pulled away.
“We should get home.”
She laughed as he peeled out the carpark, when they were in the lift, he kept his eye on the camera as she felt his arse, her hands went under his shirt, and she ran her fingers round his dimples.
She wore a wicked grin. When they got into her flat, she turned to him.
“Do you want me?”
“Yes.”
“Will you do whatever you want?”
He knew what she was asking him, she had been in charge every time they had sex, she was asking him to take control.
“No, you’re drunk.”
“I’m not drunk, I’m a little tipsy.”
“Enough to lower your inhibitions, not to make informed choices, do you remember when we first got together, the little chat we had? I’m not doing this pissed.”
She sighed. “Well perhaps don’t tie me up, but I want you, but I don’t want to be a top.”
He kissed her. “Fine, take off your clothes.” He watched her closely, she just smiled, and unbuttoned her blouse.
She smiled at his scowling face. “I kind of like you grumpy like this.”
He only raised his brow at her. She let her skirt drop, and went to cover her scar.
“Never cover yourself, not to me.” Her laughter fell away and she nodded, her bra and knickers went next, he picked her up and carried her to bed. She undid his shirt as he watched.
“What do you want me to do?”
Her lips hovered near his as she undid his trousers, he tried to tamp down his lust, but her eyes were bright, she wanted him, she was needy.
She kissed down his chest, feeling him as she went, she pushed down his trousers, he stilled her as he finished undressing.
“Sit on the edge and open your legs, let me taste you.” She obeyed with a smile.
He knelt down and held her legs wide open as he kissed up her thigh, he went slowly, savouring the taste of her skin, he could see she was wet already. He ran his tongue down her clit, then sucked and licked, until he felt her get close, he pulled back, he put one knee on the bed as he stood and half lay over her. He lifted one leg up as he slid inside, she cried out, he was angled deep inside her, and she could barely move.
“Do you want this?” he moved slowly, and she arched her head back.
“Yes please.”
“Are you mine?”
“Nathan, I’m yours, always yours.” Her words became cries as he let go, as every thrust inside her was of love, and possession. She made herself watch him, he was amazing to watch. He threw his head back as he came, his orgasm sparking hers.
They drove down early, wanting to make the most of their time, he even let her drive his car for a while. There was a settled feeling between them, it was as comfortable as she had ever felt. She was however, a little nervous. Cass had been loved by all from what Suzy could gather, and she wasn’t jealous, but they were big shoes to fill.
The little town was pretty, the small coastal village where his parents lived, minutes from the beach, albeit it a pebbly one, was a little paradise. Nathan pointed out the pub they liked, where his nan had lived before she died, the little memories of a life, she smiled at his enthusiasm, and tried to keep her nerves under control as they neared.
“Have you told them what happened?”
“More or less, no details, but they know, they remember it from the news.”
She nodded.
“They’ll love you.”
The house was beautiful, and before they got to the door, it opened and Suzy saw his parents. His mum had a grey bob, nicely dressed, with kind blue eyes, his dad was gorgeous, and she knew where Nathan got his looks. It was good to know what Nathan would look like in twenty or thirty years. Though he had been blond once, he had silvery hair, but he had a refined handsome look, the kind that only improved with age. They had the same brown eyes. She could feel the charm ooze from him, the way it did with Nathan.
Suzy watched Nathan embrace his mum and dad, it was sweet to see that kind of relationship.
“Suzy, it’s so good to meet you, call me Linda.” Suzy found herself enveloped in a warm hug, the smell of Linda’s perfume, the squeeze of her embrace made Suzy relax.
“Thank you.”
As soon as she was released, she found herself being hugged by Nathan’s dad. “We’ve heard so much about you. I’m Peter.”
Nathan took their bags and Suzy followed them in. They went into the kitchen, and she was met by two Labradors. She fussed them while she listened to the chatter of the others.
They went out onto the patio and Suzy was immediately given wine, her kind of people.
“Lance and Rachel are coming later with the kids, so you’re in the den, if that’s okay.”
“Sure.” Nathan glanced at Suzy, she was quiet, but she didn’t seem uncomfortable.
When Lance and his family arrived Suzy couldn’t believe it, they looked so alike. She blinked a few times at him, and Rachel was as welcoming and warm as she could have hoped.
The kids, Ollie and Chloe were lovely. Nathan watched them test out the newcomer by getting her to play with them in the garden.
Nathan watched her with a pang, it made him sad, but she was alive, she was happy, she was his, and it was enough.
“You okay?”
Rachel was watching him.
“Yeah.”
“Sure about that?”
Nathan turned and looked at her. “There are things I haven’t really told mum. Her injuries were worse than I let on. We can’t have children, it makes me a bit sad to see her with yours. I’m okay about it, really, we’ve briefly talked about it.”
“Did she want them?”
“I don’t think she really thought about it. But she doesn’t have the option now.”
“You wanted a family though.”
“I love her more than the idea of a family. We have other options.”
“You’re a good man Nathan.”
He loped a grin. “I know.”
“How about we go down to the beach?” Lance asked the question and the kids squealed, dragging Suzy behind them.
By the time they were at the beach, Suzy was exhausted, and held Nathan’s hand as she leant on his shoulder. He’d put on shorts that showed his legs off perfectly. She held her long sundress up at her knees as they edged the water. The shore was a little pebbly, but not too hard on her bare feet.
The dogs ran past them, and then back. Peter’s whistle brought them to heel immediately. At some point, they all met up and swapped round so that Suzy was walking with Rachel.
“It’s good to see Nathan so happy.” She threaded her arm through Suzy’s.
“I hope I can make him happy.”
“Oh you do, we were worried for him at Christmas you know. After everything he’s been through, he deserves it.”
“He does.” Suzy frowned into the distance, Nathan held Chloe’s hand, and he laughed. Maybe she wasn’t the one to give it to him. Seeing his wonderful family, all the things that she never had, made her realise what she couldn’t give him.
“Don’t worry, he loves you so much.”
Suzy blinked and swallowed. “He deserves so much better than
me though.”
“But you’re who he wants, that outdoes all.”
“I hope it’s enough.”
“Have you seen the way he looks at you?” Rachel whistled.
Suzy laughed. “You know I can’t get over how alike they all look.”
“I know.” Rachel’s eyes went wide and they laughed. Nathan turned back and caught Suzy’s eye. “See, like that.”
Suzy blushed. “You know about me don’t you?”
“Nathan told me, he’s worried that you won’t be happy. You can see it.”
“I think we have some way to go, we’ve only been back together for a short time really. It’s not just what happened to me, I have big shoes to fill.”
“Cass was great, she really was. He likes strong women, and you are that much is obvious. It always seemed like he knew exactly what his life was going to be, and he was so content with that. When she died, it wasn’t just that she had gone, but he had no plan, no path to follow, and he needs that. He has now, he’s going to live to make you happy.”
Suzy sighed. “I’ll just have to grin and bear it I suppose.”
“Yeah, it’ll be a hardship.”
After an early dinner, Suzy was almost asleep, the early start and sea air got to her.
“Come on then, let’s crash, I’m knackered too.”
After a round of goodnights, they went into the den. It was snug and comfortable, and they fell asleep pretty quickly.
Suzy woke in the dark, the unfamiliar room and bed making her restless.
“Hey.”
“Sorry I woke you.” She snuggled into him as she whispered.
“What’s wrong?”
“Do you really want children?”
Nathan stilled and put the lamp on, and he scrubbed his face. “It was something I wanted, a family. That doesn’t mean they have to be mine. It means that we make our own little family, whatever that means. As long as it’s with you, I’m happy.”
“What if it’s not enough?”
He pinned her beneath him, the springs creaking.
“I love you, so much, I’d rather have you, and only you for the rest of my life that settle for anything else.”
Saving Suzy (New city Series Book 2) Page 21