“They do.”
She draped her arms around his neck and held on as he took the stairs, carrying her as if she were one of the skinny women from the party instead of someone whose size-ten body was getting bigger every day. But then, she’d seen all his muscles a few days before. If anyone could carry her, it was him. His chest was warm and hard against her body.
Things began to tighten. Her nipples tensed underneath the gown, and that heavy weight between her legs seemed to be pulling her down into his body. Oh, yes. She wanted him. But the thing that was different from all her time with Neil was how intense it felt to want Chadwick.
Obviously, it’d only been a few months since the last time she’d had sex with Neil. Just about three months. That was how far along she was. But she hadn’t felt the physical weight of desire for much, much longer than that. She couldn’t remember the last time just thinking about sex with Neil had turned her on this much. Maybe it was her crazy hormones—or maybe Chadwick did this to her. Maybe he’d always done this to her and she’d forced herself to ignore the attraction because falling for her boss just wasn’t convenient.
He set her down at the door so she could get her key out of the tiny purse. But he didn’t let her go. He put his hands on her hips and pulled her back into his front. They didn’t talk, but the huge bulge that pressed against her backside said lots of things, loud and clear.
She got the door open and they walked inside. She kicked off the pretty shoes, which made Chadwick loom an extra four inches over her. He hadn’t let go of her. His hands were still on her hips. He was grabbing her in a way that was quickly going from gentle to possessive. The way he filled his palms with her hips didn’t make her feel fat. It made her feel like he couldn’t get enough of her—he couldn’t help himself.
Yes. That was what she needed—to be wanted so much that he couldn’t control himself.
He leaned down, his mouth against her ear. “I’ve been waiting for you for years.” The strain of the wait made his voice shake. He pulled her hips back again, the ridge in his pants unmistakable. “Years, Serena.”
“Me, too.” Her voice came out breathy, barely above a whisper. She reached behind her back and slid her hand up the bulge. “Is that for me?”
“Yes,” he hissed, his breath hot against her skin. One hand released a hip and found her breast instead. Even through the strapless bra, he found her pointed nipple and began to tease it. “You deserve slow and sensual, but I need you too much right now.”
As if to prove his point, he set his teeth against her neck and bit her skin. Not too hard, but the feeling of being consumed by desire—by him—crashed through her. Her knees began to shake.
“Slow later,” she agreed, wiggling her bottom against him.
With a groan, he stepped away from her. She almost toppled over backward, but then his hands were unzipping her dress. The gown slid off her one shoulder and down to the ground with a soft rustle.
She was extra glad she hadn’t gone with the Spanx. Bless Mario’s heart for putting her in a dress that didn’t require them. Instead, a matching lacy thong had arrived with the bra. Which meant Chadwick currently had one heck of a view. She didn’t know if she should strut, or pivot so he couldn’t see her bottom.
Once the gown was gone, she stepped free of it. Chadwick moaned. “Serena,” he got out as he slid his hands over her bare backside. “You are...amazing.” His fingers gripped her skin, and he pressed his mouth to the space between her neck and her shoulder.
Strut, she decided. Nothing ruined good sex like being stupidly self-conscious when he already thought she was amazing. She pulled away from him before he could take away her power to stand.
“This way,” she said over her shoulder as she, yes, strutted toward the bedroom, her hips swaying.
Chadwick made a noise behind her that she took as a compliment, before following her.
She headed toward the bed, but he caught up with her. He grabbed her hips again. “You are better than I thought,” he growled as his hands slipped underneath the lace of the thong. He pulled the panties down, his palms against her legs. “I’ve dreamed of having you like this.”
“Like how?”
He nimbly undid her bra, tossing it aside. She was naked. He was not.
He directed her forward, but not toward the bed. Instead, he pushed her in the direction of her dresser.
The one with the big mirror over it.
Serena gasped at the sight they made. Her, nude. Him, still in his tux, towering over her.
“This. Like this.” He bent his head until his lips were on her neck again, just below the dangling earrings. “Is this okay?” he murmured against her skin.
“Yes.” She couldn’t take her eyes off their reflections, the way her pale skin stood out against his dark tux. The way his arms wrapped around her body, his hands cradled her breasts. The way his mouth looked as he kissed her skin.
The driving weight of desire between her legs pounded with need. “Yes,” she said again, reaching one arm over her head and tangling her fingers in his hair. “Just like this.”
“Good. So good, Serena.” Without the bra, she could feel the pads of his fingertips trace over her sensitive nipple, pulling until it went stiff with pleasure.
She moaned, letting her head fall back against his shoulder. “Just like that,” she whispered.
Then his other hand traced lower. This time, he didn’t pause to stroke her stomach. His fingers parted her neatly trimmed hair and pressed against her heaviest, hottest place.
“Oh, Chadwick,” she gasped as he moved his fingers in small, knowing circles, his other hand stroking her nipple, his mouth finding the sensitive spot under her ear—his bulge rubbing against her.
Her knees gave, but she didn’t go far. Her wet center rode heavy on his hand as his other arm caught her under both breasts.
“Put your hands on the dresser,” he told her. His voice was shaking as badly as her knees were, which made her smile. He might be pushing her to the brink, but she was pulling him along right behind her. “Don’t close your eyes.”
“I won’t.” She leaned forward and braced herself on the dresser. “I want to see what you do to me.”
“Yeah,” he groaned, a look of pure desire on his face as he met her gaze in the mirror. A finger slipped inside. So much, but not enough. She needed more. “You’re so ready for me.” Then she felt him lean back and work his own zipper.
“Next time, I get to do that for you.”
“Any time you want to strip me down, you just let me know. Hold on, okay?” Then he withdrew his fingers.
She watched as he removed a condom from his jacket pocket. It wasn’t like she could get more pregnant than she already was, but she appreciated that he didn’t question protecting her.
He rolled the condom on and leaned into her. She quivered as she waited for his touch. He bent forward, placing a kiss between her shoulder blades. Then he was against her. Sliding into her.
Serena sucked in air as he filled her. And filled her. And filled her. In the mirror, her eyes locked onto his as he entered her. She almost couldn’t take it. “Oh, Chadwick,” she panted as her body took him in. “Oh—oh—oh!”
The unexpected orgasm shook her so hard that she almost pulled off him—but he held her. “Yeah,” he groaned. “You feel so beautiful, Serena. So beautiful.”
He gripped her hips as he slid almost all the way out before he thrust in again. “Okay?” he asked.
“Better than okay,” she managed to get out, wiggling against him. The boldness of her action shocked her. Was she really having sex with Chadwick Beaumont, standing up—in front of a mirror?
Oh, hell yes, she was. And it was the hottest thing she’d ever done.
“Naughty girl,” he said with a grin.
Then he began in earnest. From her angle, she couldn’t see where their bodies met. She could only see his hands when he cupped her breasts to tweak a nipple or slid his fingers between her le
gs to stroke her center. She could only see the need on his face when he leaned forward to nip at her neck and shoulder, the raw desire in his eyes when their gazes met.
She held on to that dresser as if her life depended on it while Chadwick thrust harder and harder. “I need you so much,” he called out as he grabbed her by the waist and slammed his hips into hers. “I’ve always needed you so much.”
“Yes—like that,” she panted, rising up to meet him each time. His words pushed her past the first orgasm. She couldn’t remember ever feeling this needed, this sexual. “I’m going to—I’m—” Her next orgasm cut off her words, and all she could do was moan in pleasure.
But she didn’t close her eyes. She saw how she looked when she came—her mouth open, her eyes glazed with desire. So hot, watching the two of them together.
A roar started low in Chadwick’s chest as he pumped once, twice more—then froze, his face twisted in pleasure. Then he sort of fell forward onto her, both of them panting.
“My Serena,” he said, sounding spent.
“My Chadwick,” she replied, knowing it was the truth.
She was his now. And he was hers.
But he wasn’t. He couldn’t be. He was still married. He was still her boss. One explosive sexual encounter didn’t change those realities.
For tonight, he was hers.
Tomorrow, however, was going to be a problem.
Ten
Chadwick laid in Serena’s bed, his eyes heavy and his body relaxed.
Serena. How long had he fantasized about bending her over the desk and taking her from behind? Years. But the mirror? Watching her watch him?
Amazing.
She came back in and shut the door behind her. Her hair was down now, hanging in long, loose waves around her shoulders. He couldn’t remember ever seeing her hair down. She always wore it up. He could see her nude figure silhouetted by the faint light that trickled through her drapes. Her body did things to him—things he didn’t realize he could still feel. It’d been so long....
She paused. “You need anything?”
“You.” He held out his hand to her. “Come here.”
She slipped into bed and curled up against his chest. “That was...wow.”
Grinning, he pulled her in for a kiss. A long kiss. A kiss that involved a little more than just kissing. He could not get enough of her. The feeling of her filling his hands, pressed against him—she was so much a woman. He’d brought three condoms, just in case. He had the remaining two within easy reach on her bedside table.
So he broke the kiss.
“Mmmm,” she hummed. “Chadwick?”
“Yes?”
She paused, tracing a small circle on his chest. “I’m pregnant.”
“A fact we’ve already established.”
“But why doesn’t that bother you? I mean, everything’s changing and I feel so odd and I’m going to blow up like a whale soon. I just don’t think...I don’t feel beautiful.”
He traced a hand down her back and grabbed a handful of her bountiful backside. “You are amazingly beautiful. I guess you being pregnant just reminds me how much of a woman you are.”
She was quiet for a moment. “Then why didn’t you ever have kids with Helen?”
He sighed. He didn’t want Helen in this room. Not now. But Serena had a right to know. Last week, they might not have discussed their personal lives at the office—but this was a different week entirely. “Did you ever meet her? Of course you did.”
“At the galas. She never came by the office.”
“No, she never did. She didn’t like beer, didn’t like my job. She only liked the money I made.” Part of that was his fault. If he’d put her before the job, well, things might have been different. But they might not have been. Things might have been exactly the same.
“She was very pretty. Very—”
“Very plastic.” She’d been pretty once, but with every new procedure, she’d changed. “She had a lot of work done. Lipo, enlargements, Botox—she didn’t want to have a baby because she didn’t want to be pregnant. She didn’t want me.”
That was the hard truth of the matter. He’d convinced himself that she did—convinced himself that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, that it would be different from his father’s marriages. That’s why he’d struck the alimony clause from the pre-nup. But he’d never been able to escape the simple fact that he was Hardwick’s son. All he’d ever been able to do was temper that fact by honoring his marriage vows long after there was nothing left to honor.
“She moved out of our bedroom about two years ago. Then filed for divorce almost fourteen months ago.”
“That’s a very long time.” The way she said it—air rushing out of her in shock—made him hold her tighter. “Did you want to have a kid? I mean, I get her reasons, but...”
Had he ever wanted kids? It was no stretch to say he didn’t know. Not having kids wasn’t so much his choice as it had been the path of least resistance. “You haven’t met my mother, have you?”
“No.”
He chuckled. “You don’t want to know her. She’s—well, in retrospect, she’s a lot like Helen. But that’s all I knew. Screaming fights and weeks of silent treatment. And since I was my father’s chosen son, she treated me much the same way she treated Hardwick. I ruined her figure, even though she got a tummy tuck. I was a constant reminder that she’d married a man she detested.”
“Is that what Helen did? Scream?”
“No, no—but the silent treatment, yes. It got worse over time. I didn’t want to bring a child into that. I didn’t want a kid to grow up with the life I did. I didn’t...I didn’t want to be my father.”
He couldn’t help it. He took her hand and guided it around to his side—to where the skin had never healed quite right.
Serena’s fingertips traced the raised scar. It wasn’t that bad, he told himself. He’d been telling himself that same thing for years. Just an inch of puckered skin.
Helen had seen it, of course, and asked about it. But he hadn’t been able to tell her the truth. He’d come up with some lie about a skiing accident.
“Oh, Chadwick,” Serena said, in a voice that sounded like she was choking back tears.
He didn’t want pity. As far as the world was concerned, he had no reason to be pitied. He was rich, good-looking and soon to be available again. Only Serena saw something else—something much more real than his public image.
He still didn’t want her to feel sorry for him. So he kept talking even as she rubbed his scar. “Do you know how many half siblings I have?”
“Um, Frances and Matthew, right?”
“Frances has a twin brother, Byron. And that’s just with Jeannie. My father had a third wife and had two more kids with her, Lucy and David. Johnny, Toni and Mark with his fourth wife. We know of at least two other kids, one with a nanny and one with...” He swallowed, feeling uncertain.
“His secretary?”
He winced. “Yes. There are probably more. That was why I fought against this,” he said, pressing his lips against her forehead, “for so long. I didn’t want to be him. So when Helen said she wanted to wait before we had kids—and wait and wait—I said fine. Because that’s different than what Hardwick did.”
Serena pulled her hand away from his scar to trace small circles on his chest again. “Those are all really good reasons. Mine were more selfish. I didn’t marry Neil because my parents were married and that piece of paper didn’t save them or me. I always thought we’d have kids one day, but I wanted to wait until my finances could support us. I put almost every bonus you’ve ever given me into savings, building up my nest egg. I thought I’d like to take some time off, but the thought of not getting that paycheck every other week scared me so much. So I waited. Until I messed up.” She took a ragged breath. “And here I am.”
He chewed over what she’d said. “Here with me?”
“Well...yes. Unmarried, pregnant and sleeping with my boss
in clear violation of company policy.” She sighed. “I’ve spent my adult life trying to lead a stable life. I stayed with a man I didn’t passionately love because it was the safe thing to do. I’ve stayed in this apartment—the same place I’ve lived since I moved in with Neil nine years ago—because it’s rent-controlled. I drive the same car I bought six years ago because it hasn’t broken down. And now? This is not the most secure place in the world. It...it scares me. To be here with you.”
Her whole life had been spent running away from a hellish childhood. Was that any different from his? Trying so hard to not let the sins of the father revisit the son.
Yet here he was, sleeping with his secretary. And here she was, putting her entire livelihood at risk to fall into bed with him.
No. This would not be a repeat of the past. He would not let her fall through the cracks just because he wasn’t strong enough to resist her. At the very least, he hadn’t gotten her pregnant and abandoned her like his father would have—even if someone else had done just that.
“I want to be here with you, even if it complicates matters. You make me feel things I didn’t know I was still capable of feeling. The way you look at me...I was never a son, never really a husband. Just an employee. A bank account. When I’m with you, I feel like...like the man I was always supposed to be, but never got the chance to.”
She clutched him even tighter. “You never treated me like I was an afterthought, a welfare kid. You always treated me with respect and made me feel like I could be better than my folks were. That I was better.”
He tilted her face back. “I will not fail you, Serena. This complicates things, but I made you a promise. I will keep it.”
She blinked, her eyes shining. “I know you will, Chadwick. That means everything to me.” She kissed him, a tender brush that was sweeter than any other touch he’d ever felt. “I won’t fail you, either.”
The next kiss wasn’t nearly as tender. “Serena,” he groaned as she slipped her legs over his thighs, heat from her center setting his blood on fire. “I need you.”
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