by Rita Hestand
Wherever my Heart Roams
Rita Hestand
Wherever my Heart Roams
(Book Ten of the Brides of the West)
Rita Hestand
Smashwords Edition
Copyright© 2016 by Rita Hestand
All Rights Reserved
ISBN # 9781311685216
Cover Design by: Sheri McGathy
License Note
This book, In the Arms of an Angel is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. It may not be copied or reproduced in any manner without express written permission of the author. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy or copies. If you did not purchase this book or it was not purchased for your use, please go to Smashwords.com to purchase your personal copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
In the Arms of an Angel is a work of fiction. Though some of the cities and towns actually exist they are used in a fictitious manner for purposes of this work. All characters are works of fiction and any names or characteristics similar to any person past, present or future are coincidental.
Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
About the Author
Rita's Other Books
Thirty Miles South of Denton
March 1861
Chapter One
"Isn't he the dreamiest man you've ever seen?" Beth Sawyer sighed as she grabbed the rope from the tree and swung on it. The sound of the rope against the tree was lulling, like the soft muted sounds of a rocking chair.
"Oh Beth, you gotta be careful around Pa these days. He's liable to trade you to that man just for food on the table." Her sister, Martina warned aloud with a giggle.
"I wouldn't mind. He's dreamy." Beth stole another look at the man who was talking to her father on the back porch. They were far enough away the man couldn't possibly hear them.
It hadn't dawned on Beth that she was a fully grown woman now. She had plenty of time to find a husband, and yet every time she glanced at the stranger, her heartbeat quickened.
The East Texas wind blew over Beth's face, cooling her from the sun that promised to scorch before the day was over. It was early April but the summer promised a long hot dry spell. Bluebonnets dotted the fields in the distance, The old oak tree shadowed most of the backyard, Beth loved that old tree. She figured it must have been here a hundred years or more, seeing how tall it stood. The rope from the swing made a settling sound, and Beth glanced up into the center of the old tree.
"Don't you just love this old tree."
"Never thought much about it, it's just a tree…" Martina looked at her sister strangely. "Who do you think you are, Beth Sawyer, Mother Nature?"
"Yeah, but how many times have we sat out here, swinging and enjoying its shade." Beth exclaimed. "You have to learn to appreciate things Martina, don't take everything for granted."
"You talk as if you are going somewhere." Martina frowned. "It'll still be here when we have children."
"Yes but will we?"
"Will we what?" Martina chuckled.
"Be here!" Beth glanced at her, arching a brow.
"Well, where are we going to go, silly?"
"We'll be married, we can't live with Ma and Pa forever, you know. I been thinking about that more and more lately. This won't be our home, forever. Haven't you seriously thought about marriage Martina? I mean look at us, we are fully growed. We can't indulge in childhood fantasies all our lives you know. Don't you want to get married and have children of your own?"
"Don't talk like that, I don't want to ever leave. And I don't want children…at least not right away. I've been surrounded by children all my life. If I get married I want to enjoy just being special to someone."
"I want lots of children…but we're going to have to, someday. "
"You're growing up too fast Beth. I don't want you to leave me here…alone with Ma and Pa and all the others." Martina cried out. "If you go, I go."
"Well, I am of age…" Beth laughed. "But I figure I got a few years left here. After all, I haven't met anyone I want to marry yet. I'm not in love yet."
"Would you leave me here?" Martina gasped. "I mean, if you did meet someone."
"I wouldn't want to, but if I had a husband…I would. I sure would." Beth giggled, then sighed as she stared at the handsome stranger. "I just never seen a man so good looking as that one before. He's tall, thin, and look at those eyes and lashes. Make's a girl want to swoon. Look how his shoulders are wide, and yet, his chest tapers to a thin waist and long legs."
"My, you are looking, aren't you?" Martina frowned at the man now. "Well, he is handsome, and truly built like a man, but…you can't leave me! I won't allow it."
"I'm not going anywhere. Stop your fretting. He hasn't even so much as glanced my way. What makes you think he'd be interested in me, anyhow." Beth chuckled. "But he's sure a looker."
"You can't judge a man by his looks. What if he's mean. What if he beat you every night?" Martina let her imagination run away with itself.
Beth closed her eyes and smiled. "As long as he kissed me better, I might let him." She giggled again.
Martina didn't laugh though. Martina looked from the stranger to Beth and a worry wrinkled formed on her forehead.
Beth shook her head at her. "Silly, you gotta get your head out of the clouds. Ain't no man gonna rescue us from this place. We're stuck here, with ten other brothers and sisters. We'll never get away. Who would watch the kids when they go into town? Ma and Pa would never let us go with a man…"
"I'm not so sure. Ma's sure been talkin' to us a lot about the birds and bees. Gotta be a reason, don't you think?"
Beth's mouth took on a downward curve. "Hadn't thought of that. She has hasn't she. Wonder why? Maybe she thinks we aren't listening."
Martina laughed. "Oh I listened alright, but I just don't quite understand it all. I seen animals do it all the time, but it sure don't look like fun to me."
"Come to think of it…. You know as well as I do that Pa tried to hook me up with that tinker man last year. Thank goodness they found out he was married before they tried to marry me off to him." Beth said with a huff. "And you're right…Ma's been telling us both about the birds and bees for months now. I think she has a reason. You and I are marrying age, you know. That's downright scary when you think on it, Martina. I've been so busy lately with chores I hadn't noticed, but we are what they call, 'Ripe for the picking'. And they have a house full of kids they can't support. That's a big hint that they want us to get out of here. Naturally, I'll be the first to go, beings I'm the oldest. You'll be next. And no telling where we will end up in a year or two. But if I have to g
et hooked up with a man, let it be someone as handsome as this one. Wouldn't that be something?"
"You are encouragable. Why, if I didn't know better, I'd say you are anxious to hook up with some man." Martina laughed.
Beth shrugged. "I get some stirrings every now and then. According to Mama that's natural. But most of the boys we know sure don't encourage those feelings. I'm just saying that if I did get hooked up with a man, I'd want him to be a looker, like that one." Beth sighed nodding toward the tall dark stranger that sat on the porch with their Pa. "But I am foolin'. I'm not ready to get married yet. I haven't fallen in love with anyone. You can't get married until your in love, you know. Ma and Pa wouldn't just sell us down the river. Would they?"
Martina rolled her eyes.
"You think you have to fall in love to get married?" Martina asked as she pushed Beth in the old swing. "Haven't you heard of the arranging thing some do? Why Laura Saunders was just like us and then one day her folks decided she was going to marry someone from way up north that she'd never met. I felt so sorry for her. She didn't even know the man. Can you imagine that?"
Beth turned her head to look at her. "Poor Laura, I remember the day she left, she was shaking like a leaf. And never even seen the man. That must have been so hard on her."
"I don't know. Maybe they do want to get rid of us. Getting married is scary. You go from a home full of people to just two. Maybe I shouldn't say that, that makes me want to get married." Martina rationalized it, and then giggled aloud. "Is he staying for supper?"
Martina nodded toward the stranger.
"I don't know. I don't know if there is enough for him to eat with us." Beth watched her mother from a distance. "It's downright embarrassing that we don't have enough to feed company. But we aren't alone. This past year has seen little profits for anyone. There just wasn't enough rain to get good crops in. Papa should have planted cotton, they say it don't take as much water."
"You gonna tell Papa how to farm now?" Martina frowned.
"No, but I've read about it. Cotton is the easier thing to grow in Texas."
"Yeah, but who is gonna pick it?"
"Hadn't thought of that. I guess we would. That would be a lot of back breaking work. Maybe cotton isn't the best crop after all."
She looked at the stranger once more. He was looking straight at her and her insides turned to mush. She glanced away. Why did her body react to him so? She couldn't remember any time reacting by just looking at a man. And this was a man, not a boy.
"He sure don't look like he's in a hurry to leave, though."
"You think married life is heavenly, Martina?"
"Land sakes, how would I know. I've heard all kinds of stories from Roberta, Elizabeth, and Mary. Roberta says her man won't keep his hands off of her, and the novelty has done worn off. She has to find excuses why she won't lay with him. Must be bad if you have to make up reasons not to."
Beth turned red and scoffed.
"After only three months of marriage?" Beth frowned. "That truly must be the hardest part of being married."
"That's what she says."
"What about Elizabeth?"
Martina curled her long dark hair around her finger and smiled. Martine looked like their father, with his dark hair and eyes.
Beth glanced at her. Martina was so lovely, maybe the stranger was looking at her, instead. But when she glanced at him again, her eyes met his from the distance and her body reacted once more. She held her belly.
"What's wrong?"
"Oh nothing, now what was you saying?" Beth turned away because the feelings that the stranger evoked puzzled her so.
"Elizabeth says it's a chore to make love and she hopes she gets pregnant soon so she won't have to endure it any longer."
"Wow…layin' with a fella must be awful…" Beth chuckled. "But Elizabeth's husband is handsome."
"That's what she says! Maybe handsome ain't got anything to do with it."
"And Mary? What does she say?"
Martina scrunched up her nose. "Who'd have thought it, but Mary is so happy with Arthur and I can't begin to imagine why. But then again, Mary is kind of plain, isn't she?"
"So is Arthur. And yet she's happy and the others aren't. Does that tell you anything? Maybe handsome men are not good men. And ugly men are."
"Do you think Mary is plain?"
"Yeah, I guess she is a little. Her Pa don't inspire her to primp much. Maybe Arthur is a better lover!" Beth giggled. "Maybe men that aren't so good looking are better lovers.
"Beth…I can't believe you said that."
"Well…what else are we to think. Maybe they compensate for their looks with actions." That threw them both into hysterics.
It was fun to speculate.
"Arthur?" Martina shook her head. "With his curly hair and freckles? What could any woman see in him?" Martina giggled this time.
"Well, I don't think it's the seein' that does it Martina." Beth laughed. "People seem to be drawn to certain people, haven't you noticed. Pauline was sure drawn to Mack. She couldn't take her eyes off him. It's called some kind of chemistry."
"Like in school…science they call it?"
"I guess. I don't know."
"You think he's a good lover?" Martina asked glancing at the tall figure on the porch.
"Heavens I don't know. Maybe…."
"And you…do you think you'll be good at it?"
"Martina, how would I know. The most I ever done is kiss a cousin, and not on the mouth either. 'Course I do practice with my pillow from time to time. Imagining the most handsome of handsome."
They giggled.
"Girls, come wash up and set the table for supper." Their mother called through the window.
Play time was over, but Beth loved her talk with Martina. Martina was the only one in the family old enough to talk to about this kind of thing, so when they got the chance they indulged in fantasies.
The girls obeyed and were giggling while they finished their chores. "Fourteen places, Mama?" Beth asked.
"No dear, fifteen. Mr. Cahill is joining us." Her mother informed them, glancing at Beth.
Beth set another place and looked up to see Martina smiling.
Food was scarce, how could they invite someone to eat with them. It meant taking smaller portions for each person. And their brothers were already so skinny a good wind would blow them over.
"See the others wash before coming to the table, girls."
"Yes Mama." They both replied at the same time.
It was a routine that all the children lined up to wash before eating, and Beth and Martina were to inspect their hands after each washed. Cleanliness was next to Godliness, according to the bible.
It took a good ten minutes to look at them all but it had to be done. Their parents expected them clean at the table.
When their mother put a wild turkey on the table though, their eyes got big and round. What was the occasion? It wasn't Christmas.
"Somebody die, Mama?" Beth swallowed hard when she saw her mother's expression.
"Land sakes child, no. Mr. Cahill brought the turkey with him. He shot it just the other side of Primrose. That's why he's stayin' for dinner. He wanted to share it with us, and it's the least we can do to feed him."
Beth cast the handsome stranger a glance. She had passed him on the porch and he shot her a quick glance as she passed. His eyes were beautiful, a light blue, she had noticed, and those long lashes emphasized them. His skin was so tan, it made his eyes even more alluring.
When he sat beside Beth at the table though, she quickly took in his thick black hair as he took his hat off. He was startlingly handsome.
"Thank you Mr. Cahill." Beth nodded as he took her hand in his to say grace.
She'd die if her hand sweat.
"You are most welcome, Beth." The man's voice was deep and ever so quiet.
Their father joined them at the table, giving Mr. Cahill a nod and smile as he sat down and joined hands.
They gave th
anks and everyone dug into the food. It was the first time they had meat since Christmas, so this was some kind of occasion and the girls could only wonder what was up.
"Is this a special occasion?" Beth couldn't keep her curiosity to herself.
Her mother blushed, then answered. "Yes, in a way." She glanced at Beth with a sad looking kind of smile. "It's your engagement party so to speak. You are engaged to Mr. Cahill, Beth." Her mother announced as though she should have known it.
Beth couldn't speak, she was so shocked. Engaged. Dear God, what was happening? Was it true? Talking about running away with a man was one thing. Being forced to was another. What engagement?
Had they sold their daughter for food like Martina had said? It certainly looked that way. First man to bring meat to the table gets Beth!
Beth got up and ran out the back door, letting it slam. She couldn't face the others just yet. Surely this was some kind of joke for all her comments in the backyard.
Her embarrassment followed her. She knew it was rude, but she didn't know how to handle this kind of news. And all the other kids were snickering and she couldn't take that.
She ran for a bit then stopped suddenly and collapsed in a heap on the ground. Her tears swallowed her.
She was wearing a skirt and blouse, and she didn't care if it got dusty or not. Aside from her two dresses, this was all she had, except a pair of pants her brother had given her to work in the fields.
She had joked about it just moments ago, never once believing her parents would do such a thing. But they had! She was being married off to a stranger, so they could all eat. Dear God, where was the justice in this?
But the handsome stranger stood over her now, peering down into her tear stained face. Up close he was even more handsome. She got a quick glimpse of him and turned her head.
She swatted the tears on her cheek away.
"They sold me down the river, didn't they?" She cried trying to control her rioting emotions.
He took her hand and pulled her up. "It might seem that way, yes. I’m sorry it came out the way it did. I wanted to speak to you first, of course. I was planning on asking you directly first."
