"No, but you can start new traditions once we are there. Please, I know I'm asking you to get rid of heirlooms, but the weight of your wagons is slowing down the train, and we have to get there before the snows come…" Her eyes traveled around the crowd seeing the hurt and dismay on their faces. These people had so little and yet what they had was precious to them. How could she ask such a thing?
Yet Cole had warned them of it before the trip began.
But now that the moment had come, the heartbreak came with it. Some of the women accepted it quickly and went about the task of choosing what to throw out.
She looked at their haggard faces, at the heartbreak involved in such a task and deep down it cut to the bone. So this is what Cole faced every time he took the people west.
Sam saw her glum face. "It gets to you, doesn't it?"
"I'm afraid it does."
As she headed for the chuck wagon, she heard someone calling to her.
"What all do you expect us to throw away?" Beth shouted at her.
She turned to see the angry face of Beth staring at her.
"Whatever you don't use. Whatever will lighten your wagon to make the way easier for you. I suggest the heaviest things first. I mean, even just a few things can help. See what is the heaviest and start there." Emily explained.
"What are you throwing out?" Beth asked her voice demeaning.
"Whatever I have to. But unlike most of you, I didn't bring much with me in the first place. What I throw out will be anything that isn't really needed for the trip. Cole had told you all before we left that this would eventually happen. It shouldn't come as a shock. And I do realize that you came this far, but the constant rain has created a problem and we have to make sacrifices. We'll be crossing the Snake River soon, and if we lighten our loads, we'll have less trouble."
"How about if I just throw grandpa out, and keep the rocking chair?" The first woman laughed heartily.
Relieving the building tension Emily laughed. "Well…I guess it's up to you!"
Everyone laughed.
As everyone groaned a little and went back to their wagons, she saw some trying to make up their minds what to throw out. Others just did it, the look on their faces spoke volumes.
Emily reflected on that. These people didn't have much, but some of what they had were more precious than gold to them. Family heirlooms, homemade items that just took up too much space and weight.
Poor Mrs. Crutcher was about to throw out her rocking chair when Emily ran up to her and laid a hand on hers.
"No, Mrs. Crutcher, you need that chair. Throw some of the other things away, but keep that…for you." Emily encouraged.
"Nonsense. I'm no different than the rest. I'll get rid of it because it takes up too much room and it is so heavy. I'll get another when we get there." She promised. "Just like you said."
"How old is that chair?" Emily asked, her hands going over the intricate carvings on the chair.
"Oh, I don't know…maybe a hundred and fifty years."
"Everyone on this train has admired it. You can't part with it."
"Are you sure…?"
"Of course I am. Might do me some good to get out of it more anyway. Just making an older woman out of me is all…"
Emily laughed. "Keep that chair…throw something else out."
The Martins had a time too. Mary was in tears over parting with some of her mother's things.
"We have to honey. We got too much in this wagon and you know it. Those books weigh a ton. Don't worry, we'll buy more later…" Mr. Martin encouraged.
"But those books belonged to my mother's library, she handpicked which ones she wanted us to have." Mary cried.
Emily saw the struggle and wanted to help. "Why don't you pick out a couple of favorites, and get rid of the rest of them."
"Oh, but they are all classics?" Mary argued. "How could I possibly choose?"
"Then you should be able to find copies of them there," Emily suggested.
Mary turned angry eyes on her. "It isn't fair. You come here with nothing, and you have nothing to throw away. But I have a fortune in books here. They are priceless. They are for teaching with. How can I throw our future away?"
"And how priceless is your life and well-being? If your wagon is overloaded and we cross the river, it could sink, and you with it." Emily taunted. "It's true, I have little to throw away, but I will have the task of going through my husband's things to lighten the load, and he isn't even here."
Mr. Martin stared at her for a moment. "She's right. If we want to get there, we have to make the sacrifices, Mary…Everyone else is."
"You're taking her side?"
"There is no side!" He declared. "We knew from the start we had to do like everyone else. That there would be sacrifices. We can get more books, we can't get another life Mary."
"You know what these books mean to me. How I was going to use them to teach school…now I'll have nothing…"
"It can't be helped," Mr. Martin said and started dumping crates of books out on the ground away from the train.
"You can't….I'll never speak to you again…" she threatened.
"Grow up…This is best. Now I am your husband, and I say we throw the books out. We can't eat books, we can't live off a book. When it comes to life or death, I choose life."
The woman plopped down in the middle of the wagon and cried as her husband dragged several crates out.
He looked at Emily. "We'll be alright."
"I'm sorry…" Emily said.
"Not your fault. She'll get over it. I hope…"
Emily walked away knowing the burden these people faced. And she had helped create this.
An Italian Immigrant family was arguing over which vats to get rid of. "But Papa we will need them to start our winery. It is important. Where will we get the money to buy more?" The son asked.
The Papa looked at his son. "The Lord will provide."
"Papa we are going to get there, then have no way of making a living…" His son protested.
Emily heard them and came to them. "He's right in some ways. Don't throw them all away. Just some of them. Save enough to get started in your business, throw the old and the worn out away, keep the newer ones. That's what I'd do."
The older man smiled at her. "You are very wise…"
"Thank you, just trying to help." Emily smiled and went back to her wagon.
It suddenly dawned on Emily how much of a burden this job really was.
Sam was pouring himself some coffee when she returned to the wagon. He saw her and smiled. "This isn't the most enjoyable part of the trip."
Emily nodded. "I'm beginning to realize that. Their hopes and dreams are all tied up in different things. But at some point you realize that first you must get there, then you can dream."
Sam nodded, still smiling. "You are a smart woman Emily. If you weren't married, I might snatch you up myself." He laughed and walked away.
Emily smiled to herself.
Chapter Seventeen
Cole stared at the sunrise and smiled, another beautiful day. He remembered the last time he stopped to notice, he was holding Em. Just thinking about her, he marveled at how quickly he had come to care about her. What made her different than any other woman, he didn't know. She just was. And it took some time getting used to the idea.
It was a new experience, this caring.
Love had eluded him for most of his life and to find it so easily now, startled him. Was that what this feeling that grew every time he looked at her was all about…love?
He never realized how much she filled his thinking.
They were only a day away from the Valley and Cole could hardly wait to cut loose from them and head back to the train. A big part of that hurry was seeing Em again. He knew that. He also knew that what they shared was very fragile. And they did share it. That fact quickened his heartbeat.
With Emily, he just knew.
He shook himself, he needed to keep his mind on what was in front of
him. It was dangerous getting sidetracked by a woman. But Emily wasn't just another woman. Letting thoughts and feelings dominate his thinking could get him into trouble. Still, it was there, whether he tried to move it or not.
Emily had become a part of him. An important part.
"Mr. Morgan will you be staying with us long?" Mr. Young asked as he sized Cole up quickly.
Cole glanced around at the people setting up tables of food and the way in which they all worked together so well. He admired them.
"No, not long at all. I have a wagon train to get back to. I've got to get there before they cross the Snake. We just wanted to see the Nichols got here safely. You are in Shoshone country, and they are more peaceable than others right now. But some of the other Indians are watching for straggler wagons passing through. It's pretty dangerous right now to travel alone." Cole explained.
"Yes, we've met a few of the Shoshone. We have already set up a trading with them. But…it's a shame you have to rush back, although I see the need. I know exactly how it feels to be responsible for that many people, sir. I too felt accountable for my people. Just wanted you to feel welcome here, and appreciated. We'd love to have you. Maybe you would enjoy living here in our Valley. We are a very peaceful people. You are always welcome."
"It's got its charms, but I have a job to do."
"Yes, you are right. Well, have a safe journey and God go with you, sir. It was good of you to see the Nichols here safely. They are young and inexperienced in traveling so far. Of course, we have a small epidemic of the cholera right now. We've lost a few."
"I wish you luck on that. You'll need to test your water often. Try to keep the waste as far away from the drinking water as possible. Thank you for the invite too. But we'll be pressing on. The Nichols are a lovely couple and I wish them well." Cole answered.
"Go with God…" Mr. Young said he walked off, with a smile on his lips.
Perez said something and he didn't even hear him.
"What'd you say?" He asked.
"Your mind is not with us today."
"No, I guess it isn't," Cole admitted. "I hate being one place and needing to be another."
"That is not what I meant, and you know it. You miss her, don't you?"
"Yeah," Cole looked at him and walked off. "I guess I do."
Perez smiled. He pointed to the weather as he caught up with him.
He'd seen the clouds to the north and wondered if they'd run into severe weather. But more than anything, he wondered how Emily was. Did she miss him as much as he missed her?
He could almost taste the sweetness of her lips, smell the sweetness of her, and feel the warmth from her body surging into his as he held her in his arms. He closed his eyes for a moment, savoring the memory.
Perez was quiet a moment as he stared at Cole. "You miss your woman. That is a good thing. I think she misses you too."
It was a statement, not a question.
Cole squirmed in his saddle. Was he that obvious?
Perez didn't laugh, or make fun. Instead he looked quite seriously at his boss. "It is good that you care about her. She is good for you and you her. She is the right woman."
"I'm beginning to think you are right, Perez. She's my wife, and I do care…"
"That is good."
Cole dropped his pretense and stared at Perez. "I've never been in love before…I'm not even sure what it is. But when I'm away from her, all I can think about is her."
Perez let a small smile spread across his face. "Si…it does not often happen to any man. To find a woman that fits your life…is like a miracle."
"She does fit, doesn't she?"
"Si…very much so."
Cole realized he was telling his scout his feelings and he should have told Emily. But somehow talking to a man was easier than talking to a woman.
He trusted Perez, they were good friends. But even Perez didn't know where Cole came from. No one knew about the orphanage he'd grown up in. No one knew the loneliness he'd faced and the lack of love and attention. Still, he was a man, and feeling sorry for himself didn't fit him. He'd learn to cope with life and get through it. But now, his life was fuller and he couldn't ignore what was so obvious to others. Emily meant a lot to him.
He shrugged the bad memories away from him.
He turned his attention now to the weather, determined not to spend the entire day thinking of Emily.
"Why'd you volunteer to see these people through this country?" Perez asked his curiosity peeking. "Why did you become the patron of the wagons?"
"I don't know. They are young, inexperienced, and I could see the fear on Lowell's face. He wouldn't speak of it, but it was there." Cole shrugged. "I guess it's the same reason I became a wagon master. I scouted for a couple of trains before I ever tried to take one through myself. I liked the idea of taking people to a place they could start all over and make something of themselves. I loved listening to their dreams, their hopes. I'm a wagon master. I'm responsible for them. If I'd sent them off with someone else, I'd worry about their safety, they are young and I don't imagine they realize all the dangers out here. Just thought I'd feel better seeing them through. And I do, but now that we've gotten them here, my mind turns to the train and the Snake."
Perez nodded. "You take everyone upon yourself. You cannot afford to do that. You must separate yourself from some of it. You will not save every life…"
Cole hung his head. Perez was right, but the feeling that he could save every life kept him tending to as many as he could. As he saw it, it was his job to keep the people as safe as he could, and he would try to do that.
"It's just something I have to see through to the end, myself."
"You worry about these people, and you do not even know them…" Perez stared at him.
"Don't you?"
Perez shrugged. "I do not think so. I take care of Perez so that I can do the best job that I can. And please understand, I am happy to help when I can. But I do not worry about them…they are not my children. The only worries I have is making sure I give you the right information, about the water, the Indians. I can be wrong as anyone, but when I am, it usually costs lives. I do not like that burden. So my job…as I see it is to be as right about things as I can. You cannot change people, you can't prevent accidents,either. They happen."
Cole tried to smile. "You're right, to an extent. I do worry about these people. Some of them are like lost sheep and have to be herded a certain way or they are in danger. But a wagon master must strive to take the people through to their destination, as swiftly and safely as I can."
"Si…this is true. But you cannot save them all…"
"Yeah…I know…" Cole shrugged. "That's why I worry so much."
They were in a hurry, as cholera had broken out in the Valley, ten people had already died from it. Cole fretted. This was another thing he couldn't control, disease. But there were ways to lessen the chances. He'd take every precaution.
"I don't like this outbreak of cholera following us though…" he mumbled in front of Perez. "The trails the last two trips have been full of settlers moving west, the more that come, the more chances of disease. And this is one thing I cannot save them from."
"Si…it is not a good thing. I agree."
"Let's get back."
"De nada…"
"I just hope this outbreak isn't far reaching," Cole said after a long silence.
"You must have faith in God that it isn't," Perez advised.
Cole glanced at his friend. "You know…you are right. No use borrowing trouble, is there?"
"No, my friend…"
Still they would have a long ride to catch up with the train.
As they traveled, Cole turned things over in his mind. Cholera was caused by infected water supply and contaminated foods. The problem was building or allowing the waste to mingle with the water. The trick was to keep the contamination far away from the water supply. He knew that, but knowing it and controlling it were two different things. Many tra
ins had passed before them and after them. That meant more people. People using the water and some not aware of the dangers.
He knew this from an old Army surgeon he'd known in his younger days. When he'd scouted for the army.
He also remembered some of the doctor's tactics too.
"I want you to pull a cow from the herd, and test the waters by letting it drink along the way."
"Why?"
"If it gets sick, it's probably Cholera. Maybe we can avoid the sickness." Cole suggested. "Cholera can kill before the sun goes down Perez, I've seen it, I want to avoid it at all costs. First sign that cow gets sick, you let me know. The River water is not likely to be contaminated, let's use it as our water supply for now. It will mean filling up all the barrels we have and rationing too. But it might save us."
"It is a good idea. I will do so, and tell Hawk too." Perez nodded.
"Good. I just hope they haven't crossed the Snake River yet. I know Sam knows to lighten their loads, but he might have some argument there with the people. You know it's one of the few times that the women tend to get riled. When they have to throw a heirloom away."
"Si…it is heartbreaking, but it can't be helped. We have had much rain, the river could be high…the people restless. Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of. And when it is high, it's much more dangerous." Perez admitted. "We'll probably have to ferry the wagons across. Even people who can swim die…Animals get bogged down."
"Let's ride my friend…"
"Si… vámonos "
But two nights later it rained so hard they had to camp early.
"More rain…" Perez shook his head. "It is a wet year. It seems no matter there is trouble with the wet years and trouble with the dry ones."
"Yeah…This isn't rain, it's a gully-washer."
Despite the miserable night, they managed to build them some cover.
They had beans that Emily had packed for them and some of her cornbread.
"I wish we had some of her coffee about now. I never tasted such good coffee." Perez said. "Where did she learn to make it like that?"
"Sure would be good, wouldn't it?" Cole smiled. "She used to work in an office, and to stay awake she learned fast, she said."
Brides of the West-Part One Page 52
