by Angela Blake
Jenny noticed a flash out of the corner of her eye, and she visibly tensed until she remembered that there were supposed to be reports for this PR event. She discreetly took one step to the side, so that they could do their job, and she went over her to-do list for the day as she began checking off one by one. She scribbled down some notes as she zoned the conversation out as best as she could. When she sensed that the reports were done, she took a step closer, clicked her pen shut and knelt down, so she was at eye level with Gemma.
“Wise words for a little girl, Gemma.” Mark commented
Jenny had always thought so. She began to examine Gemma as she went through the normal medical procedures and noted down her vitals which were normal and healthy. “Are you tired, Gem? Do you want to go back to sleep?”
Gemma shook her head empathically. “No, I want to talk to Mark. He’s really nice, he said he could get us all the Marvel movies, so we could watch them,” she turned the force of her hazel eyes onto Jenny, who could already feel her resolve melting. “Can we please?”
“As long as you take all your meds, eat and spend a good amount of time outside, that’s fine with me.”
Gemma threw her arms around Jenny in a hug so fierce, Jenny was momentarily knocked back by the force. Jenny pattered her head soothingly. “Remember what we always say?”
“Women are just as strong as men,” Gemma said as she gave her a toothy grin. “And I can do anything I set my mind to.”
“Atta girl.” Gemma gave Jenny a high five before scampering off to play with the other kids.
Jenny
Jenny had forgotten that Mark was there until he cleared his throat next to her. He had stood up and was leaning against the wall, watching her with an amused grin playing on his lips.
“Dare I ask what that was about?”
Jenny stood up and brushed the dust off her pants. “What are you talking about?”
Mark pushed himself off the wall. “Oh, come on now. Don’t play dumb with me. You’re trying to teach her to be a feminist, at her age.”
Jenny faced his gaze directly. “Women ARE just as strong as women, and I don’t want society’s labels confining her.”
Mark held his hands up in mock surrender. “Easy there, Rocky. I never said she should be limited, but don’t you think it’s a bit early?”
Jenny cocked her head to the side. “No, it’s not early. Besides I just asked her what she wanted to be, and we got to talking, she’s the one who came up with that, not me. I wish I had though.”
Mark chuckled. “So you want me to believe that a seven-year-old is the ring leader of your little feminist cult?”
Jenny shot him an amused glance. “First of all, it was her idea. Second, she is not a ring leader and third, this isn’t a feminist cult,” she used air quotes for the last thing, and as they made their way outside the children’s ward, they began to walk brusquely down the corridors, heading nowhere in particular.
“It’s not a cult to want to fight for basic human rights, rights that men take for granted I might add,” she responded, trying to keep the curtness out of her voice. Of course he’d be glib about something like this. He was a privileged white male, he didn’t know what it was like for other people.
“I’m not just talking about women, I’m talking about other men too. Men who aren’t white.”
“Whoa, hey, what? Feminism is a feminist movement.”
Jenny abruptly stopped in her tracks, causing Mark to slam into her back. She wheeled around to face him. “Actually that’s a common misconception. It may have started out as a feminist movement, but it’s grown to encompass so much more than that-now it’s about equal rights for everyone.”
Mark paused. “But isn’t feminism basically women thinking they are better than everyone else?”
Jenny laughed. “No, that’s just extremism. Every movement has its fanatics, and feminism is no different. No, that isn’t the true essence of feminism.”
Mark considered this carefully. “I didn’t know that.” He eyed her for a minute before continuing. “Can we continue this inside your office? I’d like to discuss making a donation for the children.”
A delighted smile lit up Jenny’s face as she gestured for him to follow her. They made their way down the hallway and stopped outside her office. Jenny opened the door and groped for the light switch as they sat down opposite each other.
For the next fifteen minutes they discussed how much money he wanted to donate, what he wanted to be done with it and possible alternatives. He actually had a lot of great ideas, and he knew exactly how to maximize the potential of the sum that they were getting. He promised he’d tell his friends about donations as well.
Jenny leaned back in her chair and smiled at him, wondering why it seemed like there were two different sides to this man.
Mark reached into his wallet and took out a cheque which he filled out before handing it to her.
“Thank you. This really does mean a lot to the kids,” she responded as she opened the top drawer and placed it there, fully intending on presenting it to the board later to show them that it wasn’t so hopeless after all. The kids would be so happy too.
“I wanted to ask you something,” Mark said finally a while later as he stood up before strolling towards her.
“Sure.” Jenny said, evenly wondering what he was up to.
“Do you ever think about that night?”
All the time she thought to herself. “Sometimes,” she offered as she watched him move closer.
“I think about it a lot, I usually don’t sleep with the same woman twice, but you-” He dropped his voice and leaned in, so his face was right in front of hers. “You I’d make an exception for.”
“Um, well I-” He brought a finger up to her lips. “Shh,” he said as he began to trace her lower lip. “Don’t over think it, just say yes.”
“I don’t think I should,” she forced out as she tried to keep her senses about her.
“Why not?” He took her hand and began to kiss it gently, making his way up her arm causing her breathing to become labored.
“Because we want different things.”
Mark shrugged as he began to nibble on her neck. “For one night, we don’t have to.”
“I, don’t-oh,” her eyelids fluttered closed as he began to nibble on her ear causing her to grip the arm rest tighter.
“Try saying yes,” he murmured into her ear as he began kissing the very sensitive vein in her neck. Jenny shuddered helplessly as her mind began to scramble to remind her why she shouldn’t indulge.
Her hands came up to wrap themselves around his neck, completely of their own accord, and her traitorous body began to respond to his touch as she waged her inner battle.
“I never did forget the color of your hair,” he murmured as he twirled a lose strand between his thumb and forefinger. “The color of a fading sunset.”
Jenny had always hated her hair, but somehow he made her feel like it was glorious. One hand began to make idle patterns on her neck while the other rested on the small of her back doing the same.
One of her hands ventured down over the slope of his back and rested just above his hips. Her fingers hovered over the edge of his shirt before they snaked their way underneath.
He shuddered at her touch before capturing his lips with hers. She quietly moaned in the back of her throat as he gently kicked her legs open and stood in between them. She pushed herself closer as she felt that fire that had consumed her 5 years ago begin to rage once more.
“Mark,” she whimpered, as she clutched a fistful of his shirt when he began an assault on her breasts. Suddenly her eyes snapped open, and she pushed him off.
Mark stumbled back in surprise and eyed her warily. “Did I do something wrong?”
Jenny ran her hands through her hair as she tried to reel her hormones back in. “No, you didn’t, but listen. There’s something I have to tell you.”
Mark nodded for her to continue.
&nbs
p; “The truth is that night you and I slept together 5 years ago, something happened, something you don’t know anything about, mostly because I didn’t know your name back then, and when I did find out who you were, I saw what kind of life you led, and I figured you wouldn’t want to know.”
“I don’t understand.”
Jenny gave him a sad smile. “No, of course you wouldn’t. I suppose it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense when you put it like that. The truth is nine months after we slept together, I gave birth.”
Mark reeled back as if he’d been slapped, his face turned white as he balled his hands into fists. “You what?”
“I gave birth,” she repeated. She eyed him carefully as she wondered if he was going to have some sort of panic attack. Mark plopped down onto the floor and stared up at her in a daze. “You gave birth,” he repeated as if he couldn’t quite believe his ears.
“To a beautiful baby boy. He’s amazing, Mark, and I wished you could meet him. Be a part of his life, but I never did find out your last name, and I didn’t have much to go on, so I raised him on my own until I saw you on TV a few months ago, I wasn’t sure, but once you came here, I knew it was you.”
Mark grew even paler. “Are you sure he’s mine?” he finally asked.
“Yes, he looks exactly like you.” Jenny gestured to the picture on her desk. Mark looked at it, studying it intently for a minute or two. “What’s his name?”
“His name is Noah.”
Mark stood up abruptly and began pacing the room. He’d stop every so often to stare at Jenny looking like he wanted to say something before he’d stop and begin the cycle all over again.
Finally, he opened the door. “I need to get out of here,” he mumbled as the door slammed shut behind him.
Jenny stared at the door in dismay wondering what on earth had possessed her to tell him at a moment like this. She should’ve planned it better, but now he was gone, and it was probably too late.
Jenny
Jenny sighed as she ran her hands through her hair, trying to untangle the knots. She had just gotten finished with a 14 hour shift, and she was beyond exhausted. She was so tired, she could barely see straight.
She yawned as she placed her coat on the coat rack behind her door before she grabbed her phone, purse and keys.
She made sure to lock the door on her way out, and she made her way down the hallway. She walked across the parking lot and got to her car and slid in.
She checked her phone and tried to keep the sigh of disappointment out of her voice when she noticed that Mark hadn’t called.
Not that she should’ve expected him to. She knew of course that he would need some time to process what she had said, but wasn’t 14 hours at least partially enough to know if you wanted to be in your kids life?
It was a no brainer surely, but then again, she didn’t really know Mark well enough to know if he’d make the right decision. The right decision to him could be staying out of his son’s life, so his son wouldn’t have to be in the press, but that would mean missing out on his childhood, and as exhausting as being a parent is, Jenny wouldn’t have traded that for the world.
She grabbed her seatbelt, switched on the ignition and drove towards her mums house where Noah was staying.
***
She inserted the key into the lock and stepped into her childhood home a few minutes later. The smell of freshly baked cookies immediately assaulted her senses, and Jenny inhaled the scent, wondering if she could possibly scoff down a few without being scolded by her mother.
“Noah, Mom,” she called out as she shrugged out of her coat and placed it on the couch.
“Mommy,” a little 5-year-old shouted as a warm body barreled into her. Jenny gazed at the face of her son, so like his fathers with his shaggy hair and green eyes, but he had inherited his mother’s red hair, and it suited his face perfectly.
Jenny ran her hands through his russet hair and smiled as he gazed up at her.
“How was your day, my darling?”
“Grandma and I made cookies,” he announced proudly as he held up one to his mother for inspection. Jenny pretended to inspect it before she nodded in approval.
“Great job, honey. It looks delicious.”
Noah gazed around as if wanting to make sure they were alone before he gestured for Jenny to lower her head. Jenny crouched down in front of him, and he put his lips to her ear. “Mummy, I’m going to give you a small piece to try out.”
He gazed around one more before he broke off a tiny piece and slipped it into his mother’s mouth. Jenny chewed slowly, her heart swelling with love for this little boy who was the light of her life.
“Why are you so quiet in there?” A female voice came from inside.
Jenny and Noah froze as they both took in the sight of Jenny’s mother-Clarisse-standing above them with a mock frown on her lips. Her red hair was hanging in loose curls around her heart shaped face, and her hazel eyes sparkled with mirth.
“Now, now, Noah, you know what I said about sneaking in a cookie before dinner,” Clarisse said disapprovingly.
“I’m sorry, grandma,” Noah hung his head shamefully as he shuffled awkwardly from one foot to the next.
“Go wash your hands and go to the kitchen, so you can help me bring in the food.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he tore out of the living room and made a beeline for the bathroom.
Clarisse shook her head as she embraced her only daughter and gave her a quick kiss on the forehead.
“Really, honey, must you spoil him?”
Jenny tossed her head back and laughed. “Actually, he was spoiling me, I was the one who took a piece of that cookie.”
“You don’t say.” Clarisse placed her hands on her hips as she pursed her lips thoughtfully. “So the boy isn’t afraid to cover for someone he loves, an admirable trait no doubt.”
Jenny grinned. “He’s one of a kind, isn’t he?”
They both shared a knowing smile as they made their way to the kitchen, and the three of them set up the table as they waited for Jenny’s father to walk in.
He walked in a while later and dropped a quick kiss on Jenny’s head before he poked Noah in the side.
They all sat down and a steady stream of conversation began as they all indulged in a nice family meal.
***
Jenny juggled the keys and her son’s sleeping form as she tried to get the front door to open. She had finally succeeded in getting the key into the lock, but couldn’t quite make the door budge open.
She huffed in irritation as she wondered if maybe she could lay Noah down on the grass for a second then pick him up again when the door was open.
Her thoughts were interrupted when a familiar voice said. “Let me.”
Jenny wheeled around in fright, her heart pounding in her chest before she noticed that it was just Mark, standing there looking sheepish.
“Jesus, Mark, you scared me,” she whispered. “At least announce yourself next time.”
“Well, I was just about to offer my help, but I was watching you fumble adorably for a few minutes.”
Jenny scowled at him as he pushed the door open and gestured for her to go through. Jenny walked in, and Mark helped her switch on the lights.
Once his eyes took in the sleeping form, his entire stance softened, and he stared at him in wonder as if he couldn’t quite believe that this little boy was his.
“Can I be the one to carry him upstairs?” Mark asked quietly.
Jenny stared at him quietly for a minute before she handed him Noah. She helped him adjust Noah before leading the way to the bedroom down the hall.
They worked quietly together, making sure Noah was in his pajamas and tucked in safely. Mark brushed his hair out of his eyes and smiled a soft smile that had Jenny’s heart hoping that maybe, just maybe, he actually did want to be a part of this little boy’s life.
She motioned for him to come outside, and he cast one last lingering look before he exited. She left the
door open just enough to hear him if he needed her and beckoned Mark into the hallway.
“Not that I don’t appreciate the help earlier, but what are you doing here, Mark?”
“I’m sorry I ran out so quickly earlier. I was just in shock, but I had some time to think about it, and I want to be a part of Noah’s life.”
Jenny watched him carefully. “Are you sure you’re not just saying that because you want to sleep with me?”
Mark laughed. “Well, I won’t deny that I want you as well. I want to be in both your lives Jenny, if you’ll let me. I don’t know the first thing about being a father, and I know you deserve so much better than me, but I want to try. Please let me try.”
Jenny looked at him for a long moment without speaking. Long enough that Mark began to fidget. His green eyes met hers in a direct stare, and Jenny could see the sincerity reflected in them.
“I’m going to go take a shower, then how about we have some dinner?” she said finally.
Mark nodded cautiously. “I’d like that.”
Jenny gestured towards the living room. “Make yourself at home.”
Mark plopped down onto the couch and grabbed the remote and began channel surfing. Jenny hurried up the stairs wondering what on earth they’d talk about, but she knew that she wanted to try, and even if it didn’t work out between them, she’d make sure he stayed in Noah’s life. He needed his father after all.
Jenny stripped and as she waited for the water to heat up, she began to wash her face carefully. She stepped into the shower a while later, and a sigh of relief escaped her lips as the hot water cascaded down her back.
She began to lather her hair with shampoo and running her hands down her body to wash herself. She gave a startled gasp when a pair of hands began to massage her shoulders.
She wheeled around and came face to face with Mark who was standing there, dripping wet and fully naked.
“What are you - ” she trailed off as he grabbed a loofa and began to gently scrub her body.
