by Bill Myers
“Is he okay?”
“Oh, yeah,” Zach said as casually as possible. “Probably just has to go to the bathroom or something.”
Elijah continued yanking and tugging and pulling.
“He looks kinda desperate.”
“Yeah, probably,” Zach said.
Elijah tucked his legs up and completely hung from Zach’s arm.
“There’s a restroom back at the restaurant,” Ashley said. “I’d hurry and get him there if I were you.”
Zach nodded, feeling very much like a human monkey bar.
“So …” she turned and headed up the steps. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Zach nodded.
Elijah began swinging back and forth on his arm, like it was a trapeze.
Ashley gave one last smile, mostly out of sympathy. “Good night.”
“Good night,” Zach answered, still pretending nothing was out of the ordinary.
She opened the door, stepped inside, and quietly closed it behind her.
As soon as it shut, Elijah dropped back to the ground, acting perfectly normal. Zach looked down at him and glared.
Elijah looked up at him and grinned.
Then, without a word, but maybe a little giggle, Elijah turned and skipped back toward the restaurant.
Zach shook his head and started to follow. “I tell you, you’re one strange dude, kid.”
Cody and Willard rounded another pile of junk and came face-to-face with an old-fashioned telephone booth.
“Here we go,” Willard said proudly.
“Here we go, what?” Cody asked.
“Here is the solution to all of our problems.”
Cody was afraid to ask, but knew he had no choice. “How will this solve all our problems?”
“Instead of just viewing Piper and her brothers, this will actually send us to visit them. It’s my new and improved teleporter machine.”
Cody simply stared at him.
“What’s wrong?” Willard asked.
“Sounds like you’ve been watching too many Star Trek reruns.”
“No, seriously,” Willard said. “You just step inside and punch in Piper’s email address.”
“And then?”
“And then it will send you to wherever she is.”
“Willard?”
“Yes, Cody?”
“Are you taking your medication?”
“Laugh all you want, but there’s only one way to find out if it works.”
“And that is …”
“Step inside and try it out.”
Cody turned to Willard and gave him one of his world-famous, are-you-crazy-or-am-I-just-having-a-nightmare looks.
Unfortunately, it was no nightmare. Instead, it was much worse.
Chapter Five
A New Day
The next morning, after sleeping in the RV, Piper started work in the restaurant. Not only did she not know what she was doing, but she didn’t know enough about what she was doing to know she didn’t know what she was doing.
Translation: The girl was in trouble.
“Miss!” some fat guy shouted at her for the hundredth time. “I wanted these eggs scrambled!”
Actually, he was lucky to get eggs at all. The fi rst time she had brought him pancakes, the second time three jars of mustard.
“I’m sorry, sir, I’ll be right with — ”
“Where’s my syrup?” an old lady demanded from the next table over.
“And my creamer!” her husband shouted.
“Sorry, I — ”
“It’s been twenty minutes since I ordered my coffee!” a skinny guy behind them whined.
“Sorry!” She raced to the coffee pot, grabbed it, and headed toward him.
“What about these eggs?”
“I’ll be right there.” She arrived at the skinny guy’s table just in time to hear a familiar voice.
“Hey, Pipe.”
She spun around and bumped into Zach and Elijah, sloshing a little of the coffee onto the floor. “Where have you two been?” she asked.
“Lady!” the guy beside her complained. “You spilled coffee on the floor.”
“Yes, I know. I’ll clean it — ”
Zach gave a lazy stretch and answered her question. “I thought we’d sleep in.”
“Sleep in?” Piper couldn’t believe her ears. “It’s — ” she turned her wrist to check her watch. Unfortunately, it was the wrist that was connected to the hand that was holding the coffee pot, which explains why the scalding liquid dumped all over the skinny guy’s lap.
“Aughhh …” He jumped up. “Look what you’ve done! Look what you’ve done!” He turned and raced for the restroom.
“Sorry!” Piper called after him.
“Where’s my syrup?” the old lady shouted.
“Listen,” Zach said, “I see you’re kinda busy. I’m just going to leave Elijah here and go visit Ashley.”
“Zach!” Piper demanded.
“Where’s my creamer?”
“Relax,” Zach told his sister. “He’s got his Bible. You know how he likes lookin’ at the pictures and stuff .”
“Miss, I want these eggs scrambled!”
Piper turned to her customers, then back to Zach, who was already heading out the door.
“Zach!”
“Could I please have my syrup?”
“Where’s my creamer?”
“Sorry.” Piper raced back to the counter and grabbed the syrup and creamer. She joined the old couple and apologized as she poured the containers for them. A nice idea … except the old lady’s pancakes were suddenly covered in creamer, while her husband’s coffee swam in syrup.
“What are you doing?!” they cried in unision.
Piper was so startled that she leaped back and slipped on the coffee spill, which sent her sliding across the floor …
“Miss, I want these eggs — ”
… and landing on the fat man’s table, her elbows jabbed in his plate, squirting the yolks from his eggs onto his shirt while she dumped the rest of the creamer and syrup on him.
“MY SHIRT!” He screamed. “LOOK AT MY SHIRT!”
Piper could only stare at his shirt in horror, while at the same time thinking, Well, at least your eggs are scrambled.
On her best days, Monica Specter was not a happy camper. On her worst days, she was a major terror. And on her worst days without sleep? Don’t ask. Let’s just say she’d be winning no Miss Congeniality contests.
No one’s sure what made her so ill-tempered.
Some say it was growing up as the only girl with six brothers. In most families that would make her a little princess – the sweet, darling girl everybody loved and treated with gentle tenderness.
In Monica’s family that meant she was the human guinea pig.
If her brothers wanted to know what would happened if you shoved one hundred fire crackers into the soles of somebody’s tennis shoes and lit them, Monica would be the one to find out.
If they wanted to know if an umbrella really worked as a parachute when you jumped off the roof, Monica would provide the answer.
And if they wanted to know what would happen if you stuff ed a little girl into an inner tube and rolled her off a 2,000 foot cliff … well, you probably get the picture.
By the time Monica was seven she learned how to protect herself from any bully.
By the time she was thirteen, the bullies learned how to run for their lives to protect themselves from her.
It’s not that she was mean. She was just … well, she was mean.
Real mean.
At the moment she was proving that meanness by screaming at Silas, their driver. “Turn back! “We’ve missed them! Turn back!”
“What makes you so sure?” Silas said. It had been a while since he’d gotten any sleep and he’d been busy just trying to keep his eyes open.
“The brats were supposed to be rescuing their parents in the mountains!”
“Right.”
>
“So look around you!”
Silas opened his eyes wider. He’d been so tired he hadn’t paid much attention to anything the past several hours.
“What do you see?” Monica demanded.
“I know, I know!” Bruno cried eagerly from the back.
“Yes,” Monica sighed wearily. “What does Bruno the Brainless see?”
“Sand!” Bruno shouted triumphantly. “Miles and miles of sand.”
“Very good. And where do we fi nd miles and miles of sand?”
“Uh … um … ”
“Come on, Bruno, think. I know it’s a new concept, but give it a try.”
“I’ve got it!”
“Yes …”
“A cat box for giant kitties?”
Monica dropped her head and covered her eyes.
“We’re in the desert,” Silas said. “We passed over the mountains, and now we’re in the desert.”
“And what do you suggest we do now?” Monica asked.
“Buy sunscreen!” Bruno exclaimed.
Monica gave a quiet groan.
But Silas knew exactly what to do. Before Monica could blow a major blood vessel, he brought the van to a stop, turned around, and headed back up into the mountains.
Zach leaned against the back wall with Ashley. The room was dark except for the single candle that lit a table where three teen boys sat. They were dressed pretty much the same as Ashley — all black with plenty of tattoos and body piercings.
Earlier, Ashley had introduced Zach to them. The skinniest one they called X-Ray. The short one was Stump. And the big one with red hair was called — what else? — Big Red. They seemed nice enough but, unlike Ashley, they were way too cool to smile.
They had set up a board game — something called a Ouija Board — and had just started to play.
“What’s it supposed to do?” Zach asked.
“It helps them contact the dead,” Ashley whispered.
A chill crept over Zach’s body. “The dead?”
“Pretty cool, huh?”
Zach swallowed but did not answer.
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s just that, well, doesn’t the Bible say not to mess with that stuff ?”
“Does it?” Ashley asked.
Zach tried to nod, but he wasn’t sure how well he pulled it off .
Ashley moved closer and whispered into his ear. “Why do you suppose it says that?” Her presence felt good, and for the moment Zach couldn’t think of an answer. Unfortunately, somebody else did.
“Because the Bible is an outdated book of superstitions.” The voice was so close that Zach jumped. He turned to see a black-haired skinny guy in his thirties standing beside him. Every square inch of his arms and neck were covered in tattoos.
“Oh, hi, Jason.” Ashley leaned past Zach and smiled. “I wondered where you were.”
“I see you brought a friend,” the man said.
“Yeah,” Ashley answered. “Zach, this is our spiritual leader, Jason. And Jason, this is my friend —”
“Zachary,” the man spoke slow and soft. “Yes, the driver of the RV. The one helping his younger sister and brother.”
If Zach had felt a chill before, he was downright freezing now. “How,” he cleared his throat, “how did you know that?”
“Oh, there’s a great deal I know about you Zachary — a great, great deal.”
Chapter Six
Darkness Closes In
Zach tried his best to stay cool. It would have helped if his heart wasn’t pounding a thousand times a second and if he wasn’t breathing like he’d just sprinted a dozen miles.
“You don’t mind, do you?” Jason asked. “My sensing those things about you?”
Ashley giggled, “I told you he knows stuff .”
“But … how?” Zach managed to croak.
Jason chuckled. “I just talked to Gus, the garage mechanic.”
Zach relaxed, but only slightly.
“But you could have learned it other ways too though,” Ashley said.
“Oh, yes, I’m frequently in contact with the spirit world,” Jason said.
“And that’s what he’s teaching us,” Ashley explained.
“Teaching you?” Zach asked.
Jason merely smiled. “Can I get you guys a beer?”
“Uh, no thanks,” Ashley said.
Zach cleared his throat. “None for me.”
“Are you sure?”
Zach couldn’t tell if Jason was sneering at him or just smiling. “No, I’m good.”
“Suit yourself.” Jason disappeared into the darkness as Ashley gave another giggle. “Isn’t he cool?”
Before Zach could answer, Big Red asked from his seat at the table, “Why isn’t it moving?”
“Yeah,” Stump complained, “it’s never taken this long before.”
Zach turned back to Ashley. “What’s supposed to happen?”
“Usually that plastic thing they have their hands on starts to move.”
“Move?”
“Yeah. See those letters on the board? The spirits move the plastic thing to spell out messages from the dead.”
Zach gave a nervous snicker, but Ashley was serious. He glanced around the room, feeling more and more like this was a place he didn’t belong.
Jason appeared at their side, sipping a beer.
No, he definitely didn’t belong.
“Hey, Jason,” Big Red called from the table. “How come it ain’t moving?”
“Yeah,” Stump said. “Something’s stopping it.”
“Might be a negative force,” Jason said.
“A negative force?” Stump asked.
“Yes, someone who is not open to our powers. Someone afraid to give in to the dark forces.”
Zach fidgeted.
Jason continued. “Not only afraid, but actually fighting it. Fighting the darkness.”
“Who would do that?” the skinny kid asked.
“Oh, I don’t know.” Jason turned toward Zach. “Maybe our guest has a clue?”
Zach swallowed. “About what?”
“About who might be stopping our powers? About who in this room is opposed to the powers of darkness?”
By now all eyes were on Zach. And they were not happy eyes.
Again, he tried to swallow, but his mouth was bone dry. “Listen,” he coughed. “I better be going. It’s getting late.” He looked at his watch. It would have been more convincing if he actually wore one, but it seemed a small detail.
“Yes,” Jason spoke so softly that it almost sounded like a threat. “I think that would be a fine idea. A very fine idea indeed.”
Cody watched as Willard grabbed the cord from the back of the telephone booth and looked for an outlet.
“Uh, listen, Willard. I don’t want to be a spoilsport, but the last time we tried one of your inventions it almost made me a permanent part of the street pavement.”
“Right,” Willard said as he pushed aside some old TV sets, a bunch of ancient computers, and pile of electrical junk. “That’s the price one pays for being a genius.”
“Actually, that’s the price I pay for you being a genius,” Cody said.
“Don’t tell me the great Cody is scared,” Willard teased.
“Scared?” Cody asked. “No way. Terrified? You bet.
Horrified? Absolutely. Wondering if I should ask my mom and dad to take out a life insurance policy on me? Most likely. But definitely not scared.”
“Relax,” Willard chuckled. “This will be a piece of cake.”
“I’m just saying I’m not crazy about having my body sent through the Internet.”
“Ah, here we go.” Willard found the outlet and plugged in the cord. Immediately the garage lights dimmed as the phone booth lit up.
Cody continued. “All I’m saying is that maybe we should run a few tests first.”
“No problem.”
“Really?”
“Sure. Just stand over there at my laptop, and I
’ll send something to you.”
“Like what?”
Willard thought a moment before turning and starting out of the garage.
“Where you going?” Cody shouted.
“I’m going into the garden to grab one of my mom’s tomatoes. Turn my laptop back on.”
Cody nodded and strolled over to Willard’s combination laptop/hair remover. Moments later, Willard returned and placed a tomato on the floor of the phone booth.
“Now turn the speakers up nice and loud,” Willard said.
Cody reached over to the laptop and turned the volume up to high.
“You ready?” Willard called.
Cody looked at the laptop, took a step back just to be safe, and shouted, “Ready.”
Willard punched a series of buttons on the phone, quickly stepped out of the booth, and shut the door. “Stand by!”
The booth started shaking. Then rattling. Then it started to make strange sounds:
GIRRR-GIRRR-GIRRR
like a coffee grinder gone berserk. Then it started another sound:
DING-DING-DING-DING
like a railroad crossing on too much caffeine. And, finally, it began the ever popular sound of a:
KERUGACHA-KERUGACHA-KERUGACHA.
cement mixer stuck on high.
All of this as the light inside grew brighter and brighter. Suddenly there were more sparks than the Fourth of July and:
POP!
it was all over. (Well, except for the cloud of smoke).
And, there, in front of the computer and speakers, sat a lovely, ripe tomato.
Well sort of…
The good news was the tomato had transported across the Internet. The bad news was it had transported into a pile of steaming ketchup.
“Uh, Willard?”
The pudgy inventor raced toward him in excitement. “How’d we do?”
“You might want to make a couple adjustments.”
Ashley tried to follow Zach outside, but Jason blocked her. “I’d like to see you in my office a moment.”
“I should really check on Zach and — ”
“This is about Zachary.”
Ashley looked up into his coal-black eyes. The man was deadly serious. And when he got that way, she knew it was best not to argue. She’d seen the way he’d humiliated other kids that gave him trouble. Sometimes he made fun of them in front of the entire group. Sometimes he gave them the worst jobs, like cleaning the toilet. And sometimes he completely ignored them like they weren’t even there – for days or even weeks.
