Done with being the model prisoner, I leaned on the refrigerator door and stared at the amber bottles meticulously lined up on the second shelf, each containing the smooth ale my body craved. One. Just one.
The back door slammed and instinctively, I shut the fridge. Riley stomped into the kitchen puffing like a mad dragon, dropping the “f-bomb” every other word.
“Whoa, slow down. What the hell has your tighty-whities bunched up?”
When Riley turned, his expression shocked me. Not even in the hospital when he discovered I coerced Kaylee into going to the party with me, had Riley appeared so torn up. He dropped onto a kitchen chair and buried his head in his hands.
“God, it’s all a lie,” he cried. Literally cried. “How could she do this to me? To her? She despises the guy for hell’s sake! How can she marry him?”
“What? Who’s getting married?” Dots connected. “Taylor? She’s just a kid. Is she knocked up?”
“No! She’s still a virgin. Or was. I’m guessing virtue went the wayside this afternoon.”
“Dude, you’re not making any sense.” I took two beers from the fridge and popped the tops, handing one to Riley. “Here, you need this.”
“Jax.”
“Shut up and drink.”
Riley guzzled like a pro, his bottle plunking loudly against the wooden tabletop. He wiped his mouth with his arm and brushed away the tears washing his cheeks.
“Taylor dated this guy in Boston before she came here. A ‘Michael’ somebody. Anyway, she’s had nothing nice to say about the guy. In fact, she didn’t even tell me about him. ‘Gremlin Grandma’ announced his existence the day she freaked out over the hickey I sucked on Taylor’s boob.”
“Is that what the ‘international incident’ was about? A damn ‘monkey bite’?” I laughed. “Dude! On her boob? You make me proud, bro!”
“Shut up, Jax. That’s not even an issue anymore. Grams took up morality patrol and has enforced a stupid midnight curfew on Taylor ever since. Between my dumb ass job and the ‘granny police’, I’m lucky to cop a feel, let alone get Riley Jr. out of the corral. Maybe this Michael guy’s the real reason Taylor’s been so skittish about messing around. I mean I’m allowed free reign on the ‘top floor’, but if I come close to touching the ‘basement’, she freaks. Now, I know why. Her ‘basement’ apparently has a guest room reserved for Michael.”
“That’s messed up, Riley. I’ve seen how she acts around you. Bro, she’s seriously into you. Something’s whacked here. Did you do something to piss her off?”
He looked at me, stunned. “No. We’ve been fine. Better than fine. When I’m working, Taylor comes to Barney’s and eats lunch or dinner with me, and she’s been helping Mom at the store. She’s even taken Dirk to the movies, which, by the way, we need to watch the munchkin. He’s going to surpass both of us with the ladies before he’s twelve.”
Riley stared past me, lost somewhere beyond the patio doors. “I don’t get it. I’m telling you, Jax, the ring on her finger? I’ve never seen one that big. The dude has bucks. No way can I compete with that.”
I snapped my fingers, regaining his focus. “I can’t believe Taylor’s all about the money, but if she is, take it from me—you’re better off without her. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but a high maintenance chick is a recipe for disaster.”
Riley chugged back the last of his beer. “Are there more? I’m thinking a ‘bender’ is what I need. Numb the pain and forget the bitch.”
I knew I’d pay royally, but I couldn’t stand seeing him hurt. No girl was worth this misery. Whatever bad karma came to Taylor, she deserved it. I popped another beer and handed it to Riley.
“Thanks, I’ll owe you. I’m going for a walk. Oh, and if ‘princess’ calls? Tell her I’m fucking Kaylee and can’t be disturbed.
Twenty-Three
LOST AND FOUND
Taylor
Grammy fixed a pot roast, complete with potatoes, gravy, and apple pie, which when she opened her mouth to give me credit for, I pinned an angry glower her direction.
“Don’t even try. Michael’s not stupid. He knows I don’t cook.”
He reached over and patted my hand. My fingers recoiled into a fist. “You’ll learn, baby. I’ll teach you.”
I shoved away from the table. “I’m going to bed.”
“But it’s barely eight o’clock, cupcake. What’s wrong?”
The list echoed in my brain but Michael’s cold stare kept me silent. I forced a small smile. “My stomach’s queasy, that’s all. Thanks for dinner.” Michael rose from his chair and I pressed my hand to my stomach…where the bruise from his fist grew larger every minute. “Michael will help you with the dishes, won’t you babe.”
Climbing the stairs hurt like hell. A burning ache radiated from the bruise on my lower back, and the tenderness between my legs stole my breath with each step. Alone in my room with the door locked, I faced the nauseating drama of the hell I’d been through…would spend my life inside of now.
“Michael, stop, please. Don’t hurt me…don’t hit….don’t...
Michael’s trophy...
You had to know I wouldn’t just give up and walk away…
His puppet…
Take your clothes off…slowly…
His property…
You officially belong to me …
His slave…
Marry me…it’s your only choice now…
His fiancé.
Michael slid an enormous diamond ring on my finger after he’d finished. Like all the men in my life, a large payoff seemed to be the quickest way to forgiveness. I didn’t even look at it. I just stared at the ceiling.
“You raped me,” I had stated in a voice I didn’t recognize.
“I did not!” He held my diamond decorated hand in front of my face. “Who the hell is going to believe that bullshit story? Baby, we’ve been together so long, people automatically assume we did the deed months ago. Rape? You’re nuts. You enjoyed every minute of it. Hell, you didn’t even fight me off. Deal, baby, and get over it.”
I did fight. Didn’t I? I cried…he ignored me. I pushed him away…he punched me. I ran…he kicked me. I gave up…he raped me. I called Riley…he left me.
“Your little boyfriend will never want you now. You’re used merchandise. But I’ll still marry you,” Michael had said, watching me dress with the same sick sneer on his face he had when he demanded the strip tease earlier.
Not true.
Then I remember Riley’s words. Hope you’re happy… I was anything but.
Anger consumed me. I ripped the blood stained sheets off the bed. The stain of sin. The witness of my non-consensual descent into adulthood. I couldn’t bring myself to even touch the mattress or the pillow his head had lain upon…his cold eyes taunting, you’re mine…you’ll always be mine.
I dragged the quilt, the only thing in the room not touched by skin or bodily fluids, wrapped it around me and settled into the rocker to sleep, or tried, anyway. All I could see when I closed my eyes was the hurt on Riley’s face. I had no way to prepare him. Hell, I wasn’t prepared for today’s horror show. I rubbed the bruise on my arm under my sweater—the one Michael gave me when he squeezed my arm after I called out Riley’s name.
I had to find a way to talk to Riley. In my heart of hearts, I knew forgiveness was out of the question. I took him beyond breakable. I shattered him. It wasn’t fair. He didn’t deserve this. That’s why the ring still circled my finger and not flushed down the toilet like I thought about doing when I finally realized what happened. In the space of an hour, I’d become damaged goods…no longer deserving of someone as good as Riley. I’d been branded “property of Michael Barnes.”
Riley wouldn’t answer my calls and his voicemail was full. When I texted, I received notification my number had been blocked. I felt like a hostage in Grammy’s house with no way to escape. I peered out the window, pondering how many bones I’d break if I jumped. Riley was less than a mile a
way—within walking distance, but he may as well have been on another planet.
The expected knock came at my door around one in the morning. I stopped breathing.
“Taylor, open up, baby.”
Michael.
Part of me wanted to hurl myself out the window to my death rather than face what awaited me if I opened the door. The other part just wanted to pretend to be asleep, hoping he’d give up and go away. Who the hell was I kidding? Michael stood on the other side of that door. He’d never give up. A second, louder knock, confirmed that.
I uncurled from my safety blanket and walked to the door, my heart slamming my spine with each step. If I didn’t answer the door, I faced more bruising, more punches or kicks. My life turned to a waking nightmare.
I obeyed and opened the door, letting the bastard inside my last sanctuary. His lips covered mine, his hands covered everything else.
This time, I counted the daisies going the other way.
**
Michael’s heavy breath on my neck and limp arm draped across my stomach clued me he’d fallen into a deep slumber. Carefully lifting his arm, I waited, but he rolled away and started snoring. Gingerly, I eased off the bed, grabbing my clothes from the floor. I couldn’t chance opening a drawer or a closet and waking the monster who took his sick pleasures out on me over the past few hours. I lost count. Lost my soul. Something possessed me to bundle the soiled sheets in my arms and take them with me.
Dressing as I tiptoed through the house, ducking into shadows to listen for footsteps, I made it to the kitchen, grabbed my purse off the counter and the keys to Michael’s car. I planned to exit through the laundry room and go around the back of the house to where I left the Mini parked.
Bless you Grammy! My clean laundry lay folded and stacked on the dryer. I opened a clean pillowcase and dumped the sheet, some clean underwear, socks, a pair of jeans and T-shirt inside. My tennis shoes sat in the basket by the door. I picked my sweatshirt off the hook and gently pushed my way through the back door, cushioning the screen with my fingers.
I ran around the side of the house and skidded to a halt. Michael had parked behind the Mini! Damn! I couldn’t chance the alarm going off on his car, so I threw his keys in the bushes and hid on the other side of the hedge where I changed my clothes, shoving my dirty ones in the pillowcase with the sheets.
I took off on foot for Riley’s, the pillowcase slung over my shoulder. Dawn barely edged the sky and I knew I might wake somebody, but I had to talk to him. He needed to know everything. I couldn’t let Riley believe our relationship had been a lie…that my feelings for him weren’t real. He had to hold on to the truth—that I loved him, only him, because if he didn’t… I couldn’t go there in my head. Our love for each other was my lifeline. Without it, life meant nothing.
An empty garbage can leaned against the side of his house—a fitting receptacle for my disgusting satchel. I scribbled a note on the back of the dairy order telling Riley to meet me at the pond, and slipped it through the mail slot of the entry door. The smell of coffee drifted back to me from the tiny opening. Someone was or soon would be awake.
I headed down the trail off the back of the house. As I dropped over the ridge, I heard Lucky bark and prayed Riley found my note. If I waited too long, the excuse I went for a walk wouldn’t fly and I’d pay the consequences. My life had turned into a series of choices and consequences and the pit I fell into, seemed bottomless.
My third attempt at skipping stones across the still pond resulted in five taps before the stone sank and Riley spoke.
“Looks like your time with me wasn’t a total waste.”
“Riley!” I gasped, pressing my heart back into my chest.
He walked slowly around the opposite side of the pond, easing a hip onto a rock. I wanted to run to him, throw my arms around him and feel his heart beat against my cheek. His arms were a sanctuary, my most favorite place on earth, but now forbidden territory. By his guarded posture and the hard angles etching his face, his feelings were steeled away along with any warmth or compassion I might have expected.
“So what could you possibly have to say to me that I would give a damn about, now?”
My throat tightened. The words stuck and felt painful coming out. “Riley, I’m so sorry about yesterday. I had no idea Michael was coming. Grammy invited him without me knowing. When he showed up at the door, I texted you. I hoped you’d get there in time to save me.”
“Save you? From what? Did you need me to hold your hand to support the diamond because it’s too heavy? You could have warned me he was there, Taylor. Not let me find him with you. Alone.” He threw his hands in the air and paced in angry dusty strides. “I’m such a damn fool! I honestly believed you loved me….that I had a chance with you…..a future. What a fucking idiot I am!”
“Stop, Riley! You’re not an idiot and I do love you. But our future….” The tears came too fast and choked my words out.
Riley walked toward me and I actually thought he would embrace me and tell me he’d fix everything and life would be okay. But instead, he grabbed my left wrist and forced my hand in front of my face.
“You don’t love one person and promise to marry another! It doesn’t work that way. Not for me. And by the way you looked yesterday, you sealed the deal.” He dropped my hand and stepped away. “Go away, Taylor. Take your lies and get the hell out of my life, and don’t look back. Hope you find everything you’re chasing after in Michael Barnes.” He turned and walked toward the trail.
“He raped me!” I shouted, surprising myself at the blunt declaration. Riley stopped, his fists opening and closing several times. “Michael raped me,” I breathed quieter through a sob, “and beat me. When he was through with me, he put the ring on my finger.”
Riley turned slowly. Confusion clouded his expression. I watched his eyes go through several emotions; bewilderment, anger, hurt, then settle again on anger.
“Well, that’s one for the record books. Rape. A bit of a stretch, don’t you think? I mean come on, Taylor. You and I haven’t exactly been virtuous, and we’ve only known each other a couple of months. You’ve been with Michael, how long? Almost a year? If you’ve let me put my hands all over you, I can hardly believe you’d stop ‘loverboy’ from doing the same….or more, given your ‘promised relationship’ long before you came to our sleepy little town.”
“Are you calling me a slut, Riley? You know me better than that!”
“Do I, Taylor? After yesterday, I’m not sure I know you at all. Maybe I never have. Good luck with the ‘rape story’, sweetheart. Wonder if Grams or Mommy thought to use that excuse.”
I lunged at Riley, clawing his face. He grabbed my wrists and held them tight. “Don’t even go there, Taylor. I don’t need the drama.”
He started for the trail again and I called after him. “Wait! I have a favor to ask. I know this is huge, given what’s happened, but I need you to trust me one last time. Please.” He regarded me, undoubtedly struggling. A drop of blood squiggled down his cheek from my scratch and inside I died.
“Riley, you have to admit I never actually lied to you. I didn’t tell you about Michael at first, because I didn’t want to ruin what was going on between us. Michael is also the reason why I left Boston.”
Riley sat on the rock in front of me. He smeared the blood across his cheek with the back of his hand. “Shit.” I opened my mouth to apologize, but his eyes locked on mine. His arms crossed his chest, his demeanor less than forgiving. “Go on.”
I gave Riley a condensed version of the night Michael first manhandled me, explaining that was why I pulled away whenever he tried to touch me.
“Okay, I believe that really happened, but I can’t swallow the rest. Sorry. Don’t you remember that night in the backyard? We were almost there, Taylor. Naked. No boundaries left.”
I swallowed the tears threatening. “I’ll never, ever forget that night. Michael can’t erase my memories of you—especially not that one.”
&nb
sp; Riley heaved a resigned sigh, his voice soft, the way I’d always remember it. “So what’s the huge favor I’m supposed to trust you on?”
“I need to borrow your truck. Just for an hour, tops. I have to take care of something in town and I don’t want to go back to the house. Michael has the Mini trapped with his car. He can’t find out what I’m doing.”
“What about me? Can I ask what you’re doing?”
“I’d rather not tell you. I swear, it’s nothing illegal. Just personal. Please?”
Riley’s feet scuffed the dirt, creating puffs of dust to circle his legs. He reached into his pocket and handed me his keys, holding my fingers a couple of seconds before letting go. A jolt of electricity zigzagged through me at the slight touch.
“What if Michael comes looking for you?”
“Tell him you haven’t seen me. That you have no intention of ever speaking to me again.”
“Not exactly a lie, is it?”
“No. I’m pretty sure I’m lucky you even came out here to talk to me.”
“Leave my keys in the driver door when you get back. I don’t want to see you again, Taylor. Sorry, but it’s the only way I can deal with the pain.”
“I understand. Thanks again for the truck.”
He started up the trail. I followed close behind, longing to reach for his hand. When he stopped at the top of the ridge, we nearly collided. For a split second, the familiar glint of what he once felt for me flashed in his eyes, but faded just as fast, as if I imagined it.
“One hour. If you’re not back, I’ll tell my dad you stole the truck.” He sprinted across the field for his house. I walked further downstream and took a different trail, keeping hidden in the trees.
One hour to erase the past twenty-four. One hour inside Riley’s truck, smelling his cologne, running through memories pressed into the tweed fabric where I’d laid many times. One last hour in his life before I disappeared…before I became a memory.
Riley's Pond (New Adult Romance) Page 17
