They talked in an obviously heated debate. He said something that from where I stood did not seem like she appreciated too awful much.
If Mia had cast a freeze spell on me, I would have not been more still. I watched. I felt myself becoming more predatory. Her hands reached to him, and his came up to block her. Their fingers linked instead. My eyes narrowed.
As I watched, Vance shook his dark head at Julia, and she said something back. When he answered her, he let go of her hands, even though he didn’t look happy to do it. I could almost see Julia thinking even from across the room. He had showed a weakness, and I waited to see what she did about it.
When he turned from her, I smiled. Yeah! He is going to leave!
Instead, she caught his arm and wrapped her lovely, slender, naked arms around him.
His arms closed around her waist. It seemed almost automatic. His eyes closed.
Red glazed my vision. I must have crossed the bar, but I didn’t have any clear memory of doing it. I climbed onto the stage and picked up the microphone. Neither Julia or Vance noticed me. They were lost in their embrace.
I held one and only one thing in my range of vision, Vance and Julia standing there in the semi-darkness. His arms around her. His hair, like a big blanket of night come to life, falling against her ivory skin, mingling with her red curls.
I found the jukebox on the wall and somehow knew I could control it from the stage. I spun it and laughed quietly. And my man, the one holding another woman looked up and saw me for the first time.
Power crackled down my skin, and I could almost see it fall and sparkle on the stage.
He stepped toward me, and I heard the CD click into place as he disentangled himself from the woman and rushed the stage.
Too late. No one could stop me
“Janie, I came to tell her I can’t see her. I came to tell her what I told you. Janie, can you hear me?”
I could hardly hear the words through the crimson that bled over my vision and mind. I did not believe him. He lied. Mia lied, too. They all did. All liars, each of them had their own agenda, and I played the fool falling for it all along. No more. Everyone wanted something. And it seemed all the more devious that they had used the guise of friendship and lies to hide their intentions. At least the so-called monsters like my mother and Chance flat out admitted what they wanted from me.
The liars had to pay. I could make them. And when the first notes rang through the bar from the speakers attached to the jukebox, Vance’s eyes widened. Julia tried to pry him away, to make him run. I wondered why he did not try, why he continued to come closer to me. He knew. I saw awareness in his eyes. Not that it would have helped him, but he did not even try to escape me.
He met my eyes and rushed to get to me before I parted my lips and began to sing along to Evanessance, “Call Me When You’re Sober.”
I had picked the song for him.
If you love me, come find me; make up your mind… Can’t keep believing, we're only deceiving ourselves and I'm sick of the lies and you're foolish.
Before I had finished that first verse, his eyes blurred. My power spread across the bar and encompassed the entire room. Although, he could not hear the words, I sang to him. I opened the fist and I began to feed. I fed off the vampires and the humans. I fed off Avery, and I fed off the witch. They all fed me, and I made them pay for the privilege.
I cradled the microphone as a precious thing and allowed my voice to ring through the speakers, even though I did not need them. The music poured over my skin and hummed through my pores as all the lovely light flowed into me.
I glanced away from my adoring lunch and saw Chance. He had come to stop me. I glared at him and shifted toward Vance. I could finish him. I could take him and Julia. Chance could not stop me.
I sang and Chance stole the microphone from me and it emitted an evil hissing screech of feedback.
“Enough.” His rough voice raked my conscious.
“No!” I punched his chest. “No!” The tears came hot and fast. I hated crying, and I had cried a lot since I met him.
“You don’t want to hurt anyone.” His eyes gentled, offering a better choice than to destroy a room full of people.
“Yes, I do.” Old Mother had warned me I would betray my friends. The tears fell harder as her prophesy came true. God, I really had become a monster. I crumbled then and he caught me. I stopped fighting for the microphone. My spell over the bar slowly shattered. I had lost my hold when he took the mike.
Vance groaned. Since I was on my knees on the stage, his confused and tortured gaze met me at eye level. He tried to get to me again. Maybe I still had him somehow captivated.
“Janie.” His voice was soft.
“I’m sorry.” I don’t know if I was talking to him or Chance or Old Mother.
Chance wrapped his arms around me and I crumbled inside. I clung to him and energy began to shimmer down his skin.
“No!” Vance’s hoarse voice rang loud. “Don’t you take her away! She didn’t mean to hurt anyone. Let her go! I can help her!”
“You caused this.” Chance’s his voice bit cruel and cold, and he glared at Vance with the kind of distaste one usually reserves for cockroaches.
I shook my head no. But as my face remained pressed to Chance’s neck no one saw me. Vance had not caused this. I had. Me, the monster.
“You can’t take care of her, can’t help her control this, vampire. You’re nothing more than a dead man. Only I can help her now.”
I shook my head more fervently. I tugged at Chance.
He ignored me.
“I love her.” Vance yelled it, and the words echoed in the silent bar.
Julia gasped.
I glanced down at Vance, who I had tried my hardest to kill. He crawled toward us. I had weakened him, and fed from him, yet he claimed he loved me. I blinked and the tears fell without restraint. I reached a hand toward Vance, but Julia placed her hand at his back. If Vance loved me, why was he letting her touch him? Vance, quite simply, did not love me. I let the hand drop and remained silent.
Chance shoved to his feet, sweeping me up in the process. He glared at Vance like some avenging god from Greek mythos. His tousled red hair framed his angular face like a ring of flaming garnets, and his sneer so acidic it burned. “You cannot help her. If you loved her, you would leave her to me. I am the only one who can protect her, the only one who can teach her to live with this. Someone who loved her would want the best for her. By keeping us apart, you are killing her.”
But that wasn’t true. I loved Vance, too, and he certainly would not kill me. I opened my mouth to disagree, but Chance popped us out before I could debate.
After a moment in the silence of my room where Chance had taken us, I had to agree with popping out. Vance had Julia. Love did not have someone else in its arms. That remained the big flaw in Vance’s and my relationship. Too many people in it.
I curled tighter around Chance. “What have I done?”
“Shh.” He helped me out of my clothes with all the care of a brother. He put me in bed and curled around me, but didn’t try anything. He held me and kissed me and whispered to me. Little nothing comments, dumb things meant to soothe.
“I am a monster.”
“No.” His hand stroked my hair. “You are still Janie Smith. Nothing more or less than you were yesterday. One slip up does not end the world. The vampires will cover it up and what they don’t, I’ll fix.”
When he put it like that, I felt no more responsible than an errant six-year-old whose parents had to clean up the mess that he made in a grocery aisle. I pushed at him. “That does not make it okay.”
He nuzzled at me. “But, for some reason, you don’t want me to distract you from this?”
“No.” I grumbled my answer into his storm scented skin. “Why would I?”
He nibbled at my chin. “Well, I don’t know. It would be easier not to think about it overmuch. If we can fix it, why worry?”
Bec
ause I had done something awful. Because I had no self-control and could not manage my temper. Because I realized that Vance and I would not work. I pulled Chance closer and squeezed my eyes shut.
He slid his body to spoon mine. We fit as easily as if we had lain like this a hundred times before.
“Go to sleep, Janie.” He kissed my head. “It will seem better in the morning.”
“How do you know?”
“Because everything always does.” I could almost hear the smile in his voice.
I glared at the wall. “Well, that is a dumb answer.”
He laughed.
But I was tired. I should have shown more backbone against the godlike creature who claimed me, soothed me, and pissed me off more often than not. But he snuggled warm and comforting at my back. I slept, aware that sunrise would fix nothing. I would still be a monster when morning came. I just wouldn’t be a tired one.
CHAPTER Fourteen
The evening of my engagement party, night fell as it does each and every evening except I had to dress up. I’d sent my kid off to play with a gaggle of witches for the night. We piled into Mia’s car, instead of mine, since it held more people and more heat and headed to my engagement party. Even though time had passed, I continued to feel raw and jagged.
I wore a grimace and a pair of black slacks and matching silk blouse. I had borrowed a simple silver necklace from Mia. To coordinate with my hair, she had loaned me a chain with a silver wrapped piece of some dark purple, sparkling stone, cut square and simple. I liked it despite the occasion and fingered it nervously. I had on minimal makeup to downplay my looks, but Mia had insisted I not cover the siren mark at my neck. She claimed Kermit clashed with silk. Although I agreed, it felt a bit like going out to feed a shark with a bleeding finger.
Mia drove, but kept glancing my way. She looked lovely. She had fashioned her curls in an elegant array and her maroon outfit seemed more fitting than my funeral attire. Mia sparkled. She had not downplayed anything, but then again, she never did.
Wedged in the back, like paranormal sardines, sat Sven, Vance, and Avery. Vance and I had not spoken since the night at Peaches. I could not think of a thing I wanted to say to him, and I figured he and Julia had probably sorted things out. If not that night, then last night. I pretended not to notice that he wore a suit that cut the breadth of his shoulders and accented the lean line of his hips. I openly ignored his frothy white shirt that I wanted to touch to see if it felt as soft as it looked. I even resisted the urge to run my fingers through that silken hair which flowed like night across that white in such elegant contrast.
I was sure he didn’t notice me at all. He certainly didn’t say anything. His jaw clenched the one time I glanced at him. He probably hoped I wouldn’t say anything while he braced himself for some sort of emotional outburst from Crazy Janie, psycho-killer.
He would have to wait. I radiated control. No problem. I wouldn’t even feed anymore. I had not fed since Peaches. Not that I had told anyone that. I had decided to swear off my siren side, for the good of mankind. I did not feel well, not at all.
Sven cut a debonair figure himself. Dressed in a white shirt and zebra print blazer, proof that leopards were not the only animals from the Savanna mocked for the sake of fashion, he stood out even in our group. His stark black tie and the general restraint of his outfit amazed me. There wasn’t a bit of pink. Or a single sequin. He hardly resembled himself. Of course, his shoes were alligator. They did not go with the theme of the coat, but who was I to judge?
So off we went to my engagement party. Squashed between the male witch and the vampire in the back sat my tiny fiancé in a tiny black tux over a tiny black shirt. Of course, not trusting my taste, Mom had sent over clothes. We both wore all black. I felt pretty matchy, but my mother had sent over the clothes and it was her show. Avery appeared tinier than usual, seated between the giant and the bloodsucker. Almost like a kid without his car seat. Then again, black is slimming…maybe mom should have sent red, because Avery was not a man anyone wanted to have shrink by ten pounds. You could lose the little guy altogether.
Frank the muse followed us in Vance’s PT Cruiser. Frank had reappeared as we walked out the door. Mia had been thrilled. I have to admit to a less enthusiastic reaction. He did not make my top ten list of favorite people in Ashtabula County. But, as I was not feeling up to arguing, or much of anything other than walking, I glared, but kept mum. Frank had dressed in a black tux with a purple cummerbund. He looked like part of a wedding party, not an attendee at an engagement party. I wondered aloud how he could possibly be of any help to Mia, but she waved me off with a glittering hand and, as I said, I didn’t feel up to a lengthy debate.
When we pulled up to the Winery, the sea of cars amazed me, and I wondered what else the place had going. The well plowed lot seemed like winter had moved on. The valet stared at us as if we drove a clown car when we all piled out. Apparently, no one had informed him of my status as “princess.”
I let Avery take my arm and tried not to feel like an idiot as he led me into the main conference room, which mom had listed on the invitation as the ‘ballroom.’ Once there, the crowd shifted en masse to stare at us.
White roses, ivy, and Christmas lights swamped the room with pseudo elegance. Candles burned at each table and vases of white roses sat everywhere. Mother had dressed her court in every color of the rainbow. Only our party wore black, which explained the outfits. She had only the ‘royals’ in black. A distinction designed to ensure instant recognition. She loved to plan stuff like that. I should have thought of it and worn something else to be uncooperative.
My chin came up automatically. I blinked in the lights. They glittered, glowing with unattainable energy. I hadn’t eaten in forty plus hours. Everything glittered. I had waited too long. Things had passed blurry hours before. The moment struck me as an odd milestone. I had never starved the hunger so long and hadn’t known I could. Perhaps I could develop a tolerance to it. I could never have withstood it this long in the beginning.
I walked without stumbling. My skin ached, but did not burn. I had not gone blind. The room blurred further. Perhaps, I could get past it, control it somehow.
I held on to Avery’s arm. Mother made some announcements, and Avery said something. Honestly, I don’t remember much of what went on or what anyone said. I can’t say as I would have cared anyway. I felt the smooth silk of Avery’s jacket under my fingers. I toyed with the sharp edges of Mia’s necklace. Mostly, I ignored Chance as he tried again to get in my head.
I had sensed him all day. He hovered on the edges of my mind. A whisper, a yell, a taunt…depending on the moment he demanded and cajoled me to let him in. But I’d kept him out. He knew what I intended, but couldn’t stop me. I wouldn’t let him close enough. I shut down the walls and closed him out as tightly as I could. I hid in a tiny room, and he could whisper through the door, but he couldn’t get to me.
Once we arrived at the party, though, his presence changed from mental to physical. Somewhere, outside the walls of the winery, he called to me like a warm breeze. Still, I kept him out.
Suddenly, I realized I had lost time. Mia stood at my side with a worried expression. “Are you okay?”
I nodded. “Why?”
She glanced around at the crowd, stepping closer to me. “Every time you speak, people swarm you.”
“What do you mean?” As the silvery question slipped from my lips, five goblins stepped closer to me. They literally stopped their conversation and turned to me. Behind me, a fairy male and an elf edged close enough to nearly touch me. A troll dropped his drink and reached for me as well. I blinked. Further away, Frank stood amused as always. Never a good sign.
“Are you doing something with your voice?” Mia touched my arm, her face creased in lines of concern. “Janie? When you speak? Are you doing something on purpose?”
Her voice sounded a long way off because of all of the spinning colors. I turned and saw people dancing. Vance swayed on
the dance floor, a spot of darkness in all that color. He beckoned me. I smiled. I suddenly didn’t care about our issues. Absorbing the music, I walked toward him. The band must have taken a break because “Going Under” played over the winery speakers.
I wished I could hold him. I gazed into Vance’s true blue eyes and longed to touch that night black hair. I was afraid to speak. I had no idea why people came to my voice. I wondered if he knew. I was afraid to ask out loud though and make more people come to me. Chance would know. I could ask him without speaking out loud, but if I let him in, I wasn’t sure I could shove him back out…or if I would have the strength to want to shut him out.
I let the music flow over me. Our gazes locked and the music spoke for us. Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding for you and you still won't hear me…I'm going under.
I had bled for him and wanted to do it again. I wanted everything the way it had been—simple. I wanted to lean on him and know things would be okay. I wanted to be in a world where safety existed in his arms.
The music played on and I swayed. His hand slid around my waist. Better yet, I would save myself as I had last week. I had saved the day, even if I had done it by enslaving myself as a monster. Maybe I would wake up next to him in a world where he could walk in the sun, and I could forget to sing and eat the world…
With his touch, I shivered. Maybe he did not see me as a monster. Maybe we could get past everything including Julia. He had said he loved me. Maybe. Such a lovely word. I slid into his embrace and into those lovely eyes. My hands slipped around his neck.
He pulled our bodies closer. I rocked with him on the dance floor. Unlike our “Moondance,” this dance beat slower. Two predators stalking. No one existed but us. It felt like dirty dancing, the way we moved, our bodies fitted to one another’s. I breathed him in, and he snuggled me closer so I could inhale the scent of his skin as he ran his lips and teeth teasingly over mine.
Odd Melody (Odd Series Book 2) Page 19
