by Nicety
“I’m…I’m…I’m Mexican and black.” I lowered my eyes and exhaled as I punked out.
“Girl, are you serious? I knew you was mixed with something with all that thickness you got going on.” He laughed slapping his knee. “Is that what you thought I wouldn’t understand? I don’t give a fuck about that baby. I want you, not your skin color or your nationality.”
He sounded educated when he spat that knowledge on me. I was totally hooked on this handsome man. There was something about him that I needed to grip but I just couldn’t touch it. He was an enigma of some sort, all cool and smooth with his swag. It was the kind of swag they couldn’t imitate to sell even if they tried. No other nigga made me feel the way he did, all melted inside every time I laid eyes on him. That’s how I knew he was the one. He was the one I was meant to be with, forever. We just met at a weird time in my life and maintaining this relationship without my papa finding out was going to be hard, especially after I completed my job.
“So tomorrow night I wanna take you to the club and introduce you to my right hand. You feel me? You gonna be seeing a lot of him so you might as well meet him now.” Cesar said as he scooted all the way down in the sofa and closed his eyes.
He was tired I could tell. His fingers interlocked slowly as he settled in for the night right there. I rocked him gently so as not to piss him off but only to stir him a little, enough to wake him. My hand caressed his as I grabbed it pulling him up and leading him back to my bedroom. He followed walking zombie-like behind me and as we entered the room he flopped down hard on my big ass king sized bed. I giggled a little at how cute it was that he felt right at home with me. Cesar kicked his jumpers off and crawled further into the bed removing his shirt from over the top of his head revealing the chiseled chocolaty goodness that he was blessed with. I crawled in next to him laying my soft body next to his rough one placing my hand and head on his chest. It was perfect, too much like right even. I didn’t know how I was going to lead a double life without him ever finding out but he was definitely worth trying.
Chapter 3- Mink- The Next Day
The sun slapped gently against my cheeks through the window. I watched as my mom and my son moved my big black garbage bags full of clothes, shoes, and purses to my mom’s car. My life was being removed from this apartment like it was being hauled out for trash. I was still in a state of shock that Cesar had left me destitute like this. It was bullshit and he knew it. I walked through the empty place checking it out to make sure I wasn’t leaving anything of importance. As I made my way into the bathroom, I noticed I had left the pregnancy test from last night on the back of the toilet unused. My nerves wouldn’t allow me to open it let alone piss on the damn stick but I knew it needed to be done one way or the other. Even though this was definitely going to bring Cesar back to me, I couldn’t bare the thought of ruining my perfect figure for nine fucking months because of it.
“Um, Mink, you could get your ass over here and help us. You know it is your stuff we’re lugging down all these stairs.” My mom frowned as she dropped one of the garbage bags down next to the front door.
“Yeah, momma. Can’t you help us just a little?” CJ asked in the sweetest little voice.
“Now you know momma don’t do no manual labor, boo boo.” I laughed at him. “Momma, y’all almost done now. Please don’t start this shit with me.”
“Start with you? Girl this shit belongs to you, not me! I’m not the one who needs to move out of here.” She snapped picking the bag back up. “You had no business messing up your happy home. Stupid ass.”
She was now mad at me. Seemed like everybody was starting to hate me but I didn’t give a fuck. Motherfuckas didn’t give a real fuck about me so why should I care what they thought or how they felt? Please. They knew me and knew how I operated and in my eyes they would all just get over it and did what I said regardless. CJ shook his head in disappointment in my direction but I didn’t give a fuck about what he thought either. He was my son, which meant he was a child and children didn’t have opinions in my book. I could thank my mother for that way of thinking.
Focusing my attention back on the blue ClearBlue Easy box resting on my porcelain white toilet, I went in the bathroom closing and locking the door behind me. The writing on the box started to look like foreign jibberish as I blinked my eyes to try and bring the results information into focus. My fingers cracked the flaps open as quietly as I could so as not to alert them to what I was doing, pulling the electronic test out gently. I stared at it like it was an unknown object releasing a deep breath in the process. Truth was even if it came out to be that I was pregnant, I wouldn’t even begin to know whose fucking baby it was and that’s what scared me the most even though it shouldn’t have mattered.
I pulled my jeans and panties down as I sat on the toilet waiting for the pee to flow from my puss, grabbing the pen like stick from the sink removing the top. I shoved it in between my legs just as the last few streams of pee trickled out of me. The stick moistened and the aroma of strong piss in the air, I placed the top back on it and set it back on the sink while I wiped and pulled up my underwear and pants. My legs paced the floor as I listened to the rustling outside the door along with my mom’s mouth still bitching about me not helping them.
“SHIT!” The words just excreted from my mouth, uncontrollably.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
“What’s going on in there, Mink?” My momma yelled, banging on the door like the fucking feds.
“Nothin’ ma! I’ll be out in a minute, damn!” I bellowed.
I moved in closer to the stick to make sure I was seeing things clearly on the display. My eyes moved back and forth simultaneously from the display to the picture of the results on the box to ensure that I was reading the shit right. My breathing slowed and my legs stood still from the trembling motion they were in before I looked. My body straightened up standing straight placing my hands on my hips in disbelief. It was funny because it actually gave me the answer that I was hoping to get. After this I knew I was going to have to keep my lie rolling since the stick just shut it down and proved that I was not pregnant. A sigh of relief was all I could muster. I shrugged knowing that all I had to do was find a bitch that was pregnant and pay her ass to piss on one of these sticks for me so I could show it to Cesar until I actually got popped off. My lips released a faint snicker.
“Mink! Get your ass out here now! I’m done and if you want the rest of this shit in the car then you gonna do it yourself! I’m not your fucking maid and I refuse to break my back for your lazy ass.” My momma came back banging on the door.
“Alright ma! Damn, I can’t stand your ass.” I mumbled.
“That’s the only way this shit is gonna get done fucking with me.” She continued as I opened the door, rolling my eyes as I walked out. “I don’t know how you got so damn spoiled.”
“Spoiled? You act like my life was the shit, like I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth and got whatever I wanted when I wanted it.” My eyes rolled again.
“Mink, how was your life so bad? Because you had to follow rules, keep your legs closed, and go to school? Girl, you really got life messed up and I don’t know how you got this way. Them damn streets, I lost you to the streets.” My mother shook her head much like CJ did earlier.
“Whatever. I ain’t got time to go through this shit with you right now.” I said picking up one of the large black bags realizing just how heavy it actually was. “Ugh! Ma, I can’t lift this shit.”
“You shouldn’t have made these bags so big if you didn’t want to carry any of them yourself.” She laughed as I struggled to lift it once more.
“Here, mom. I’ll help you.” CJ said softly as he kissed my forehead and hoisted the bag up with no problem hauling it out the door.
“Now see, that’s a man right there and he ain’t nothing but ten years old.” My mom pointed. “That’s who you need to be living for right there.”
“Don’t start with me momma.”
“The fuck you always got something to say for, ma? Just mind your own damn business about what I do with me and mine.” I said just as her phone rang. “Thank God.”
She yapped on the phone for about ten minutes while I plopped my ass down on the carpet taking a breather. CJ walked back and forth, dropping sweat bullets as he past by me. I could see he was working hard and struggling his self with the bags. Even though I was grateful I refused to show any kind of weakness in front of my bitch ass momma. It would just be another thing for her to speak on.
“Love ya boy.” I said as CJ hoisted up the last bag and walked towards the door.
“Love you too, mom.” He said in a low tone as he walked out.
“Flava said she gonna meet us at my house to help with all this shit you done packed.” My moms said as she peeled herself off the floor.
“Ugh! For what? I’m so sick of her ass.”
“And I’m sure she’s sick of you but that’s your sister and she’s gonna help. Shit it ain’t like you will.” My mom snapped on her way out the door. “All you know how to do is sit on your lazy ass.”
I walked towards the door, ignoring her comment and tossing the keys on the floor, staring down at the trash on the floor. Yeah, I could have cleaned up the apartment before I left and washed the dirt that had formed on the walls from years of CJ losing his mind with his food while he played, but fuck that shit. Fuck that landlord and fuck Cesar’s credit if he decided to sue him for damages. The nigga should have thought about that before he so abruptly decided to put my son and I out on the fucking street.
As the door slammed, I stomped down the stairs almost pouting like a five year old. My mom and Cj were looking at me like I was crazy but I just smacked my lips and rolled my eyes the whole way to the car. Honestly, I was dreading the car ride to her house and also dreading the sight of Flava’s ass. We were not speaking and I had no plans of burying the hatchet with her neither. She knew not to call my phone with anymore of her bullshit, so if she thinks she’s gonna talk that shit to my face she’s got another thing coming. I had on my jumpers too, so I was ready to dog walk that bitch across the pavement if need be.
Twenty minutes later we pulled up in front of my mom’s house and there was Flava’s ass sitting right in the driveway in her BMW. I always hated when she showed up on the scene with that motherfucka. She wasn’t doing anything but showing off the fact her and Yolo got matching cars. I exited my momma’s car and walked right up to the porch opening the door as my mom and CJ began to get the bags out the car. I felt Flava’s eyes pierce through the back of my head as I passed her but I wasn’t about to feed into her attempt to piss me off.
“Aye, you don’t see me standing here?” She yelled as she exited her car.
I ignored her. She wasn’t slick with that shit and I had bigger fish to fry. It dawned on me that my cell hadn’t blown up all day. Cash usually called me by now and he hadn’t. He hadn’t even texted me about needing a fix or his regular feeding either. That was odd and as bad as I wanted to wait it out and let him come to me, I made the first text. I hated chasing niggas especially since Cesar had been having me graveling at his knees damn near. But Cash was my mini meal tickets too. He was the only nigga at this point hooking me up for the time being and as long as I strung him along thinking he could get whatever he wanted from me, I knew I could get whatever I wanted from his ass.
“You could come help us, Mink!” Flava yelled.
“I could do a lot of things bitch!” I yelled back walking in the house. “Like whoop your ass.”
“Don’t worry about it momma. I’ll help you with this shit since your lazy ass daughter is too handicapped to move a muscle.” She laughed. “How’s my favorite little nephew?”
“Auntie, I’m your only nephew.” CJ smiled back at her as they play fought in the front yard.
I wish my eyes could burn through glass as I looked out the front window at the two of them. The connection that she had with my son pissed me off to the fullest but I never said anything because I didn’t want him to hate me for not letting him associate with her. What she needed to do was have her own damn babies and leave mine alone. Once they were done bringing my bags in the house and dropping them right in CJ’s room, I gazed around the room wondering how the fuck my son and I was going to sleep in this room together for another month until Cesar came for him.
“Ma! I can’t get your office room upstairs? I mean I need my privacy.” I asked walking back in the living room where they all were sitting and chatting.
“Girl at this point you better be glad you got a roof over your head.” She said as they all had a great chuckle at my expense. “Besides you don’t need any privacy cause ain’t no bumpin’ and grindin’ happening up in my house. You understand that?”
“But ma, you know CJ sleeps wild.” I whimpered.
“Well then I guess your ass is on the floor then.” She laughed making her way into the kitchen. “Got me out here on my off day slaving away doing manual labor I ain’t got no business doing.”
“Don’t stand there pouting with your arms folded lil’ sis. Gon’ and pick that shit up.” Flava smirked pointing to the floor.
“Pick what up?” I asked looking around at the bare wooden floor.
“Your bottom jaw!” She laughed.
CJ wanted to burst out into giggles with her but I eyeballed him sending the signal that I was still his momma and could still tag his ass. Looking down at his brand new Jordan’s that Cesar had bought for him last week, he made his way back towards our room. My eyes reached back up to Flava’s wondering why she was even here. I knew she had some other ulterior motive because she never just shows up unless she wanted something. At least that’s what it seemed like to me.
“So why are you here, Flav. We’re done remember?” I asked with a raised eyebrow.
It was all in her eyes but her lips really didn’t want to speak the words. She stuffed her hands in her pockets facing me barely blinking. Sweat droplets formed on her forehead, as she looked down at her $1500 black Manolo Blahnik booties. I would have never done any kind of work in those kinds of boots, which led me to believe that either she did not care about wasting her money or never came over here to start any drama in the first place. Flava whipped her long ponytail around to the back of her before raising her head up to me staring worriedly up at me.
“We need to talk, Mink.”
Chapter 4- Cesar
“I love it!” Lasha screamed as she wrapped her long arms around my neck, squeezing tightly.
“I guess we’ll take it.” I said as we both turned to the caramel skinned Afrocentric woman standing in front of the huge bay windows of the living room.
“So you guys want to take this three bedroom Chicago Ridge single family beauty on sale for $179k?” The woman recited as she wrote on her pad. “You are really catching a deal in this economy because this is a very prominent neighborhood. Very nice, very nice and quiet.”
“Just what we need, some peace and quiet.” I smiled as my lips pecked Lasha’s. “Right babe?”
“That’s right baby! CJ’s gonna love it!” She replied with the glimmer of happiness in her eyes.
“That’s great! So how would you like to pay for this?” The woman asked pulling out some paperwork. “Have you gotten an approval from a bank yet?”
“Um, no. We’re paying cash.” My voice was so filled with confidence I thought it was beaming like a searchlight from my forehead.
“Fabulous.” The woman said as she walked towards the door. “Well if you’ll follow me, we can go to the office and get the paperwork done right away.”
“Naw, naw. You know what. I’m not really one to sit down and do all of that so if you could just make it happen and tell me where to sign that would be great.” I said handing her the b
riefcase that Yolo had given me minus fifty grand. “There’s a little something extra in there for you.”
“Thank you sir. Right away sir. Here are the keys right here on the mantle and I will be in touch with you this evening for your signature.”
“You just had the cash already counted out for her? Hmm…seems like somebody had this planned.” Lasha smiled.
“I knew you’d love this house so I didn’t set up any times to look at others. We have the same taste so I knew you’d fall in love with it like I did.” I grinned.
“Alright well see ya.” The woman interjected as she stormed off.
The realtor couldn’t get out of the house fast enough damn near tripping and falling on her way out. I walked up behind Lasha allowing her firm backside to graze gently against my manhood careful not to let it grow too much but just enough to let her know that he was paying attention. We swayed slowly from side to side as if the wind and silence of our brand new house was playing a love song that only we could hear. I wrapped my hands around her thin waist, coddling her warmth in my arms.
“This all feels like a fairy tale.” She said exhaling deeply. “I don’t ever want it to end.”
“Why does it ever have to?”
“I don’t know…I’m just saying.” She breathed.
“You all mysterious and shit girl. What’s the deal with you?” I smirked trying to read her facial expression as she turned to face me.
“Nothing baby.” She coughed grabbing the back of my head. “I’m just always on, thinking about the other night with you.”
“You need another fix baby? You fiendin’, is that it?” I kissed her neck opening my mouth a bit to get a good suck on her silky smooth bronzed skin.
“Baby, that’s my spot dammit and there are no blinds on the windows, Cesar.”
“So. You worried about the neighbors seeing something? Shit, you need to be worried about them hearing you.” I replied between kisses. “Besides they need to get used to it anyway.”
