He was the fulfillment of Dr. Pretorius’ toast.
The horrible realization of that new world of gods and monsters.
A god and a monster.
“You son-of-a-bitch.” Zakkery sat up, fingering his cut lip. “I’m trying to fucking help you.”
“Well, your tries are obviously not good enough.” Kingu watched impassively as Zakkery staggered to his feet. “How long will it take you to find me another batch of women to evaluate?”
“Oh, no time at all, Romeo. They’re lining up to meet you.” Zakkery spat out a mouthful of blood. “Seriously, in case you hadn’t noticed, we’ve gone through pretty much every volunteer in the Cloud Kingdom. The next step is drafting you some potential girlfriends and I’m not eager to take point on that.”
“Draft?”
“Kidnap.” Zakkery translated, with fake cheer. “And I don’t think anybody needs your skill with the ladies to know how well that’s gonna go. Nothing a girl likes better than having Prince Charming abduct her and chain her to a wall.”
Kingu felt himself pale. “I’m not going to fucking chain her!” He roared. Visions of his mother shackling him stabbed into his brain and he turned away with an agonized flinch. “No.” He pushed the memories away and tried to focus. “The woman needs to be willing.” He got out hoarsely. Anything less would turn him into Kay. He’d rather be nothing at all than to be like his mother.
Zakkery squinted at him like Kingu was deranged. “Hang on, you think this girl is gonna want to be with you? Really? You?”
Killing Zakkery would yield nothing. Kingu reminded himself of that on an hourly basis. “Given time, I’m confident I can win her over.”
“Oh yeah?” Zakkery smirked. “With what? Poetry?”
Kingu snapped his fingers, again. He wasn’t sure why he needed that little tic in order to access his burgeoning powers, but it worked so he didn’t complain. He was just happy they’d started to return, at all. In her coma, Kay had lost most of her control over him.
At the small sound of the finger snap, a massive treasure chest appeared in the pastel grass beside him. Made of gold, it overflowed with gemstone encrusted jewelry, stacks of glittering coins and several elaborate tiaras.
Zakkery’s eyebrows shot up, again.
Kingu didn’t even bother to glance at the fortune worth of pirate loot. He snapped his fingers and the sparkling mound became a jet black Lamborghini. Snapped them again and it turned into a crystalline greenhouse filled with impossibly beautiful flowers of every description. Then, into a silver filigree coach pulled by a rose-colored unicorn.
“Alright, I get the picture.” Zakkery muttered. “Very subtle. You wanna buy yourself a girl.”
“It seems like the most expedient route, yes.” The sparkly unicorn disappeared and Kingu crossed his arms over his massive chest. “Does this make your job easier?”
“Maybe.” Zakkery still didn’t sound overly hopeful. “It’d still be best if you snapped yourself up a Halloween mask when you meet your destined sweetheart, though.”
“I don’t have a destiny.” Kingu said flatly. How could he without a soul? “I’m a god. I shape fate to suit my purposes. It’s part of the job description. Right now, it suits my purposes to have you and you vile little Phase buddies do what I tell you to do. And I’m telling you to find my woman.”
Zakkery gave a mocking salute and jumped off, probably to find more cigarettes.
Kingu absently flexed his fingers. So far, creating simple objects was the extent of his manifested powers and just that small show had drained him. He was careful not to let the Phases see that he was still recovering, but he knew that it might take decades for him to fully heal. It was unacceptable and the weakness infuriated him.
Until he was recovered, he needed to stay out of sight here in the Cloudland. He didn’t have a choice, if he wanted to survive. There would be beings looking for him, far more dangerous than these incompetent Phases.
Not the least of which was his aunt.
Kingu’s jaw ticked. He hated this fucking kingdom, but, thanks to Aunt Tessie, he had nowhere else to go.
The Cloud Kingdom was an undeniably beautiful place. No one could dispute that. But Kingu never had much use for beautiful things. He didn’t trust them, because he so obviously didn’t fit into their world.
Not that he disliked it here. Honestly, anywhere was better than life with Kay. He just didn’t feel comfortable in the Cloudland. All the Elemental Kingdoms looked different and this one was kind of… fluffy. It didn’t suit him or any of the current residents. The edges were too soft, the colors too muted and pink. Even the trees were sort of rounded and Wonderland-ish. You just had the feeling that the Phases who lived here were all into yoga and tea parties.
Instead, it was blood sports and brothels.
Of course, it hadn’t always been so misleading. The Cloud Phases who had once inhabited it were a bunch a happy hippies or whatever. They were all dead, now. Most of them perished in the Fall and the final few stragglers died in some kind of sophomoric dune buggy crash. They’d left their sunset colored land empty and the impractical circular buildings deserted. The whole place had just been sitting there, waiting for someone new to move in.
Eventually, they did… And there went the neighborhood.
The Dr. Seussian Cloudland was now a waylay station for all the Elemental riffraff. All the Phases who had no place in polite society. All the lunatics and killers. All the people who’d been cast out of their Houses over the centuries.
All the Phases who had been Banished.
Banishment was the main way that the Council dealt with Phases who broke their most sacred laws, like murder, rape, insurrection, and generally being a criminally inclined asshole. Anyone Banished was cast out of the Elemental kingdoms and left to fend for themselves or die. Most of them died. But apparently some of them didn’t and they’d all started a little “we hate law abiding society” club here in the deserted Cloudland.
When the barriers between the realms fell, all the bad guys took it as an open invitation to move back to the right side of the tracks. Eminent domain and finders keepers and all that. Anyone could travel to any land now that the supernatural fences had toppled. In a few short weeks, the Cloud Kingdom had become the Wild West meets ancient Rome, filled with all sorts of infamous law breakers. The Cloudland’s stupid round houses were taken over by saloons and their once lush flowers gardens now grew substances not even Kingu recognized. Any kind of debauchery or illicit substance in the universe was available from these lowlifes for a shockingly low price.
But could they find one lone woman?
Of course not.
Kingu shook his head in disgust and turned back towards the blood red castle he’d appropriated for himself. When he’d first moved in, it had been a gingerbread cottage painted cloud pink and sky blue. It reminded him so much of his mother’s Barbie colored mansion that he couldn’t stand even walking through its candy cane striped door.
It was the first thing he’d changed about his new life. The first time he’d used his powers just because he’d wanted to.
Even with his weakened energy, it had taken less than a second to turn the cupcake-ish structure into an ominous, demonic tower of slick crimson stone and jagged plastic spikes. It loomed over the Cloud Kingdom’s landscape like a curse.
Then, to add to the curb appeal, Kingu tossed in an acid moat and dozens of heavy black gates. Also made of plastic, naturally. Elementals could manipulate natural products, but they couldn’t do jack shit to anything synthetic. They couldn’t get through plastic, couldn’t break it, and couldn’t create it. Kingu didn’t have that problem and he wanted them to know it. Every day or so, he tacked another story onto his home, along with some more instruments of plastic impalement. Redesigning the fortress was his only hobby.
The Phases now walked four blocks out of their way, so as not to pass too close to his house of horrors.
For that alone, the tower del
ighted him.
Kingu never allowed anyone past his front door. Well, actually it was less of a “door” and more of a fifteen foot high portcullis. Just because he could, Kingu had added a suburban, flowered welcome mat at the foot of it. Not even the Phases were dumb enough to take him at his word.
He snapped his fingers as he crossed the drawbridge, removing the supernatural locks he’d put in place to keep out any guests, and…
The “wham!” of energy took him by surprise. Kingu had thought he was incapable of feeling surprise, but he’d been wrong. He was completely shocked when someone jumped into the Cloudland, almost on top of him. He felt them slam into his side, knocking his gigantic body off-balance through some kind of bizarre luck or incredible plan.
“Oh dear!” He heard distinctly and then Kingu was tumbling into space. One second he was stalking across the cauldron-y moat of boiling yellow-green acid… The next he was falling into the cauldron-y moat of boiling yellow-green acid. He hit it with a splash that sent the caustic liquid a dozen feet in the air.
From somewhere close by, he heard people start bellowing that they were under attack. The Banished Phases lived in constant fear of Job or the Council sweeping and killing them all. If only Kingu would get so lucky… Gods, even with his ears filled with acid, he could hear their panicked shrieking.
Imbeciles.
Kingu surfaced, feeling more than a little pissed off at himself for getting caught unaware, and at the Phases for being Phases, and –most of all-- at the soon to be deceased creature who’d knocked him into the bubbling moat to begin with. Acid itself didn’t affect him, but now he was all wet and he’d liked this gods damned suit.
“Fuck.” He wiped a hand over his face, dispelling the liquid with an impatient shake of his palm. Someone was about to die.
“Oh wow. I am so sorry.”
Kingu focused on the female voice and felt himself still.
He’d been pushed into roiling acid by a cartoon character.
Kingu knew for a fact that there were no aliens in this galaxy, but the woman was like something from another planet. Vibrantly colorful, she blinked down at him with an innocent face and a rounded, rosy shape that no Phase was capable of possessing.
What the hell…?
His astounded gazed scanned her. All the Elementals were scrawny. It was one of the more depressing facts about life among them. This girl’s shape was… better, though. Much, much better. Kingu came of age in a time when women aspired to be more than runway waifs. When the gods and monsters of the world cared about maintaining strength and creating life with their bodies.
The curves of this female were so much closer to his ideal than any of the stick figures Zakkery had selected for him. An unfamiliar sensation of lust pooled in his lower body as he stared up at her.
He had to be losing his mind. Had to be.
This woman was probably some incompetent assassin sent to kill him. Plus, she was blonde and he couldn’t stand blondes. That should trump everything. To counteract the crazed thoughts, he tried to concentrate on her clothing, which was… distracting. She was dressed a bizarre mishmash of patterns and colors that made his eyes cross. A tie-dyed sweater over a leopard print skirt. Rainbow striped tights and gold sequined tennis shoes, all of it topped off with a plastic polka dot headband.
She was so… chaotic.
And still he couldn’t look away from her.
A pair of heart-shaped rhinestone sunglasses covered her eyes, but he could feel her staring at him. Processing what he was. She crouched down onto the surface of the drawbridge as if in a trace. Her perfect lips parted as she studied the cruel, inhuman lines of his face.
Kingu waited for her to cringe. To scream and run.
To back away from him.
Instead, she held out a hand as if she thought she could help him up. “Are you okay?” She asked softly.
Kingu blinked. That was the only response he could muster. No one had ever, ever, spontaneously tried to help him before. It was… amazing. A part of him wanted to grab her outstretched palm in dazed wonder, but he quickly suppressed that illogical thought with a swell outrage. Did she really think someone like him needed assistance from someone like her? That he was some object of pity? He was a god and she was a… whatever she was. Certainly not a god. He didn’t feel any coming power from her, at all.
What was a woman so… Blind? Naive? Stupid?... doing trespassing this shithole kingdom, anyway? Where had she come from? She looked like she belonged in the damn kitty cat and bubblegum store. And why wasn’t she running away from him? He had to scare her. He scared everyone. How could this irrational creature be immune? Seriously, what the hell was she? An Elemental or… Kingu’s eyes widened.
Dear gods, was she human?
If any creatures were even less important than the Phases, it was the humans. They were the algae in the food chain. Powerless, plentiful, and undoubtedly slimy, they fed along the bottom, too stupid to even notice they weren’t alone in the pool.
She didn’t have the telltale streak at her temple, marking her as a Phase, so human seemed like the next safest bet. But she had jumped into the Cloudland and humans couldn’t usually do that. And what would a human be doing in this realm, especially by herself? Where had her protectors gone? This woman was used to having someone look after her. He could see it every smooth, pampered inch of her skin.
“Yoo-hoo.” She waggled her fingers at Kingu, apparently stumped as to why he was regarding her incredulously and not grasping hold of her hand.
A charm bracelet jingled on her wrist. Made of silver, it was weighed down with dangling Ferris wheels, enameled butterflies, and assorted fanciful shapes. It was so feminine and dainty that he could only imagine it had been a gift from some male admirer.
His jaw tightened.
“Wow, is that acid I pushed you in? I’ve never done that before.” Her nose wrinkled. “Does it hurt? It probably hurts. Shoot, I’m really sorry. I’m not sure what happened. I have trouble aiming jumps and…”
Kingu cut off her rambling by leaping out of the moat. It was a simple enough thing to do. He sprang straight upward and easily landed on the thick plastic drawbridge. The whole surface rocked under his weight, sending the girl stumbling to her feet, trying to maintain her balance. Kingu ignored her.
He snapped his fingers, instantaneously replacing his suit with a dry one. General distaste for mortals aside, Kingu always wore human style suits. Unlike certain miscellaneous creatures, he liked looking presentable.
Satisfied he was once again in control of the situation, he glared down at the female. Standing next to her, he topped her by almost three feet of solid muscle. With no effort at all, he could have lifted her over his head and thrown her right into the acid. No matter what species she was, it wouldn’t have been real pleasant. She had to realize that. Crimson colored eyes burned into her with enough fury to send the little fluff-ball up in smoke.
And still she didn’t run.
“Monster.” She whispered in awe.
Kingu leaned closer to her. “God.” He corrected flatly.
Her lips parted again and she breathed something that sounded like, “Oberon,” but Kingu couldn’t be sure.
He hesitated, not wanting to kill the girl before she told him why she’d come to attack him. Did she work for Tessie? It didn’t seem possible that his aunt would pick a hired killer this inept, but then Tessie was half human and she’d willingly Matched with a Phase, so her IQ couldn’t have been that high.
He loomed over the curvy little whatzit, trying not to notice how appealing she was beneath her every-item-at-the-yard-sale fashion sense. Up close, the girl smelled like sunshine. He couldn’t really describe it except it was the warm, clean, scent of freedom. An altogether foreign rush of feelings came over him: Anger and anticipation and shame and possession and lust.
Mostly lust.
She called him a monster, right to his face. He wanted to drag her into his house and prove her rig
ht. “Why are you here?” He ground out instead.
“I think my grandfather sent me.” She gazed up at him, fearless in the face of imminent death. “He told me that…”
Whatever else she planned to say was lost when Galen, of the Stone House came charging over, leading his brigade of lack wit guards. “There she is! The invader! Get her!”
The spell around them broke.
Kingu’s head snapped up to glower at the Elementals. “It’s about time you got here, Galen. Aren’t you supposed to be in charge of this damn place?” The Stone Phase had appointed himself dictator of the Cloudland. “Why am I being attacked right outside my own home?”
“I didn’t attack you. Honestly, this is all a mistake.” Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm spun around to face the onslaught. “Oh dear.” She murmured like she suddenly realized she was in deep trouble. “Okay, wait. There’s been a mistake here.” She held out both palms traffic cop- style, as if she really expected the armed men to stop heading her way. “This is not the library.”
Chapter Two
No light, no fire: the unfriendly elements Forgot thee utterly
William Shakespeare- “Pericles, Prince of Tyre”
“Okay, where’s Hope?” Teja demanded to no one in particular. “She was supposed to meet me at the library.” She stalked into the living room of the Fire Palace, dumping her stack of books onto the coffee table. Shaped like a Phase being consumed by flames, the vibrant paint job helped show off his screaming agony in striking artistic detail.
Most of the house had been decorated in Spanish Inquisition Chic, so Teja no longer even processed the gruesome glass eyes of the figure pleading for an end to his torment. Nor did she notice the chandelier made of skulls, or the dozens of weapons crisscrossed on the crimson walls, or the scorch marks on the sofa from when Missy and Alder got into a fight while opening presents on Gaianisha Day and set the whole room on fire.
Treasure of the Fire Kingdom (The Elemental Phases Book 4) Page 4
