Slowly, I rest my phone on the table. Hayes pats the spot next to him, and I scoot over.
“You’re weird,” I whisper.
Hayes gives me a side glance and nods. “You’re not exactly normal either.”
My hand caresses his resting on the table. “You said you feel vulnerable during sex. If that’s why you’re acting weird now, just keep something in mind. I’m your friend. I don’t want anything from you. I’m happy with the way things are now. I’m not working a con. You’re safe with me.”
Hayes frowns at my tone. I know he hates being babied. I also know he worries I can hurt him. Keeping everyone at a distance kept him safe as he took over White Horse. He relies on no one person. This gives him safety in some ways but makes him vulnerable in others.
“I don’t trust people either,” I say once our food arrives. “I don’t want to be sucked into people’s drama or feel like I owe anyone.”
“Do you trust me?”
Without thinking, I shake my head. Hayes grunts in response.
“Do you trust me?” I ask.
Hayes’s frowning face softens. “No.”
“So then we’re on the same page.”
Finally, the big grump smiles. “I guess we are.”
“Trust is overrated anyway. When you trust someone, you give them the power to fuck you over.”
Hayes cuts his steak into big pieces and then smiles again. “You’re a great broad, Candy. If this fucking thing doesn’t work out, don’t throw a fit and quit. I like having you around.”
For him, this is one hell of a compliment. He might as well say I’m the most special person ever! Hayes knows he’s gushing. His face struggles to shift into a frown, but he can’t manage it. Between the morning of sex and a good piece of meat, the guy is in heaven.
I feel pretty great too. Lust without fear is a novel idea for me. Great sex without consequences isn’t something my family ever manages. We always fell in love, usually to our disadvantage. I wonder if that’s what happened with Honey. Was Andrew great in bed and the powerful orgasms blinded her to his many, many flaws?
I glance at Hayes and feel safe. Not because he’s a nice guy. He’s most definitely a jackass, but he’s my jackass. I’ve known his flaws from day one. He’s known my boundaries all along. We work because we both suck at normal relationships. This fucking employee/employer/friends thing could totally work especially if we don’t think about it too much.
TWENTY FIVE - HAYES
Restless during the weekend, I drive around White Horse and check on my investments. People bow to me and say happy things, but I only become more agitated. I can’t even lie to myself about why I feel this way.
I want to see Candy.
Two days without her feels like a fucking eternity. I consider dropping casually by her house. We’re friends. Her kids know me. I can hang out and do whatever normal people do during the weekends.
I imagine taking them out to dinner. We can play family, and I am the average dad who happens to cuss a little too much. The twins think my foul mouth is funny. Candy does too. They understand me. I bet they won't mind at all if I drop by.
Instead, I visit my father. Seeing him won’t open a can of damn worms like going to Candy’s house would. She’ll think I’m her boyfriend when I’m not sure what the hell we are anymore.
Balthazar is in his comfy chair. Gladys the Cat sits on his lap. The TV is on as usual, and he’s watching something on the Discovery Channel. I check the kitchen to make sure it’s well stocked. His aide Lizzy Anne doesn’t work on the weekends unless it’s an emergency. She left a note on the fridge, so Balthazar knows what food she made for him to eat at each meal.
On the counter, his medicine is in three containers. Each is labeled with large letters. I doubt Balthazar needs shit dumbed down to this level, but Lizzy Anne doesn’t want him dying on her off days. Or she doesn’t want him calling her when she’s at home and ruining her weekends.
I sit in the spare chair and ask how he’s doing. Balthazar only shrugs and pets his cat. He’s like a bitchy teenager these days. He grumbles, shrugs, rolls his eyes, and gives me shit constantly. I wonder if this is typical behavior for old people or if Balthazar is just using his last years on the planet to give people a hard time.
“Has Candy been coming by?” I ask when he ignores me to watch his show.
“Every day. She and Lizzy Anne don’t like each other.”
“How do you figure?”
“Lizzy Anne said she doesn’t like Candy, and Candy flipped off Lizzy Anne when she thought no one was looking. I was looking, though. I’m always looking.”
“I’m not paying her to like Lizzy Anne. I’m paying her to check on you.”
“She does.”
Balthazar doesn’t say anything else, and I watch the show with him for a few minutes.
“What do you think of Candy?”
“She’s a looker.”
“Anything else?”
“She’s taller than Lizzy Anne.”
Rolling my eyes, I sigh loudly so he’ll pay fucking attention.
“I’m dating Candy.” I say and then pause to wonder if hotel fucks count as dating. “We’re seeing each other, so I wanted to know what you thought of her.”
“I suspected you’d sleep with her.”
“Why’s that?”
“I told you. She’s a looker.”
I nod and consider leaving. Rather than give up on this father and son bullshitting session, I try again.
“She has two kids.”
“Oh, you don’t want any of that. I’ve seen on TV what happens when mothers and kids get new men around,” Dad says with a knowing nod. “Never goes well.”
“It’s a package deal. If I want Candy, I have to deal with her kids.”
“Good luck then. Won’t end well. I’ve seen it on TV.”
“Not everything on TV is real.”
“Enough of it is.”
I think about Candy and immediately crave her touch. I want to hear her voice, see her smile, and taste her body. She’s got me feeling like a fucking fool inside.
“Even if she and I don’t stay together, I think she’d be a good candidate for giving me an heir.”
Balthazar gives me a side glance. “What do you want one for?”
“Don’t you want a grandchild?”
“No. Your mother wanted one. I don’t like children. They steal and never flush.”
Frowning at him, I ignore his dig at me for waiting too long to have kids.
“I never stole from you, and I always flushed.”
“Yes, but you were a weird kid. Most kids steal and never flush.”
“Candy’s kids are well behaved.”
“That’s what they want you to think,” he says conspiratorially.
Frustrated, I stand up. “I don’t know why I came here for advice.”
“You don’t want advice. I gave you some, and you got your panties in a bunch. You want an ass pat. I’m too old to pat your ass, Gussie.”
“Well, all right then. This was a good talk.”
“Don’t pout just because I don’t see why you’d want an heir. You don’t like kids, and yours won’t live up to your expectations.”
“I worked hard to make my money,” I say, wanting someone to agree with me since I’m always right. “I want to leave my businesses to someone.”
“Like I said, your kid won’t live up to your expectations. You’ll want it to be like you, but no one is like you. “
I think back to my childhood and suspect Balthazar’s correct about me being outside the norm. At ten, I started a lemonade stand with a neighbor girl. We made okay money, but I decided our profits were taking a hit from the competition down the street. My solution was to threaten the other kids into shutting down their stand. Once they folded, my business doubled its profits.
I’d never considered that kind of thing was weird. My business partner did eventually quit, saying I wasn’t any fun.
Even if I was strange and my kid turned out normal, I didn’t see an alternative to having an heir.
“I’d rather burn my businesses to the ground than have the government take my shit when I die.”
“Then burn them. Of course, you probably won’t know when you’re going to die. Few people do.”
Irritated by his rational yet annoying responses, I walk to the door. “Have a good night. I’ll come by in a few days.”
“Good to see you.”
Balthazar is already focused on the TV before I open the door. He has no time for me anymore. He was a decent father when I was growing up. Even when I got taller than him and looked like another man, Balthazar Hayes did right by me. More likely he was doing right by the woman he loved. Once Mom died, he stopped pretending as much. He once told me “an old man doesn’t have time for lies.”
Balthazar isn’t wrong about why I came. I did want him to pat my ass and say life was about easy choices. I could have Candy and deal with her kids and still be me. I might even have a kid of my own and leave my empire to someone I trusted. I could have everything I wanted without any downsides.
Yeah, talk about an unearned ass pat.
TWENTY SIX - CANDY
I can’t stop thinking of Hayes. Why did we have to fuck on a Friday, so I’m forced to go an entire weekend without seeing him? The tenderness between my legs is a welcome reminder during those two days. I also notice big purple hickeys on my breasts. Hayes left his mark on me, but my desire to see him is about more than fucking.
I miss him and wonder what he’s doing. I saw him at his most vulnerable, and now I don’t want to look away.
I take the kids to the movies on Saturday. The entire time out, I keep hoping to run into Hayes. Or even just see him on the road. A single glimpse will sate my desperate need for him.
By Monday morning, I’m chewing on my nails in anticipation. Cricket notices me tapping my foot while we wait for our turn to drop off at school. She shakes her head.
“We’re not that bad.”
“It’s not you. I have to pee.”
Chipper frowns at me. “Girls are weird.”
“They really are,” Cricket replies.
They laugh at their comments until it’s time to climb out of the car. I watch them walk inside and then haul ass to the office. When I see Hayes’s truck in the parking lot, I cry for joy.
I hurry across the parking lot. After slipping on the gravel and nearly falling on my ass, I get to the front door and find the front office empty. Hayes is in the back, reading something on his laptop.
“Good morning,” I say with too much enthusiasm.
Hayes narrows his eyes. “Hello.”
I wait for him to show some sign that he missed me over the weekend. Hayes frowns and then returns to reading. I don’t storm out of his office. My retreat is more like moping.
We’re pathetic. Both him and me. Him for being an insensitive dickhead even if I already knew he was an insensitive dickhead and shouldn’t be shocked when he behaves like an insensitive dickhead. Me for, well, expecting him to be anything more than an insensitive dickhead. Ugh, what in the hell is my problem that I raced into the office as if he’d be waiting with open arms?
Sulking at my desk with a fresh cup of coffee, I give myself a pep talk. I have two great kids. I live in a nice house in a nice town and have a nice job with an insensitive dickhead for a boss who also happens to be super hot and lenient about my need to surf the internet for hours a day. Yes, I’m living the fucking dream, and there’s no reason to be upset about anything ever. Cheer up, Candy!
By the time Hayes appears from his office, I’m wearing a fake, happy smile and thinking fake, happy thoughts.
“Hello, boss.”
“Hello, employee,” Hayes says, leaning against the wall near my desk. “How are you feeling?”
“Fine. How are you?”
“My dick was tender over the weekend. I think you might have bounced too hard on it.”
“I regret nothing.”
Hayes smiles in an amazing way that ruins any progress I made with my internal pep talk.
“Are you hungry?” he asks.
“Not really. I had something to eat with the kids.”
“Wrong answer. Let’s go.”
I stand up too quickly and nearly knock into him. Realizing he planned to plant a kiss on me before our near collision, I grab his shirt and tug him back toward me.
“I felt you inside me all weekend,” I admit, completely pissing away the pep talk.
Hayes hesitates, but I don’t care.
“You’re so sexy when you play hard to get,” I say, lifting my lips.
Unable to deny me, Hayes kisses me just like I’ve craved. His lips are angry as if two days without mine have enraged them. I wrap him in my arms, and his kiss softens. Deepens too, and I love how he nearly devours me.
“We need to get to the hotel and fuck,” he says, pulling away his lips.
“I thought you were hungry.”
Hayes hands my jacket to me and frowns. “I’ll eat you. Let’s go.”
Excited, and a little terrified, to find out how Hayes’s version of going down on me will play out, I hurry to the truck. He drives like a man on a mission while I try to relax in preparation for the intense fucking I know awaits me.
We arrive at the hotel where Hayes already has a room waiting. I don’t know if he always has a room or if he plans ahead, but I’m not asking. The wrong answer might put me in a bad mood, and I’m looking forward to a few hours alone with Hayes after a long weekend without him.
Once the door shuts, Hayes kisses me hungrily. He tugs at my clothes and his own. When they don’t relent fast enough, he pulls his lips away.
“Strip.”
“You’re so bossy,” I tease, pulling off my shirt and sliding down my jeans.
I barely remove my bra before he’s buck naked in front of me and sporting the kind of boner that would make a lesser woman shriek in terror.
“You’re too slow,” he grunts, wrapping an arm around my waist and carrying me to the bed where he yanks off my panties and tosses them to parts unknown.
I try to prepare for his frenzied lips between my legs and fail. His beard tickles my inner thighs while his mouth latches onto my damp flesh. I cry out in both surprise and pain when he sucks at the still tender area. What his lips lack in tenderness, his long tongue makes up for with penetration. I’ve never been fucked by a man’s mouth before, but I must say I approve. I come too quickly and lose out on a longer tongue fucking.
Hayes’s dick is leaking something fierce, and I doubt he’ll last more than ten thrusts. I’m wrong again.
He attempts to press gently through my swollen lips, but his erection has a mind of its own and enters me in one fast thrust. His hips take over and bang against mine wildly. He’s ready to come. I know he is, but he doesn’t for nearly ten minutes. I stare up at him, admiring the unhinged expression of a man lost in lust. He’s fucking me so hard and deep that I have to hold onto him to keep from smashing my head on the headboard.
Once I get the hang of his rough rhythm, I play with the thick hair on his muscled chest. My fingers feel the groan rumbling in his chest as his orgasm grows. He literally growls as the first wave of cum fills me. Gritting his teeth to keep from howling, Hayes is gorgeous as he pumps everything he has into my waiting body. I never think of coming myself. I only want to witness him give into all of his pent-up desire. An unleashed Hayes is a truly remarkable sight.
Giving our bodies a short break, Hayes relaxes next to me. He slides his index finger between my lips, and I suck at it instinctually. Popping it from my mouth, he uses it to follow the curves of my breasts.
“Can I ask you something really personal?” I ask, taking advantage of his good mood.
“No.”
“Is Balthazar your real father?”
Hayes gives me a dark frown. “What does it matter?”
“I’ll take tha
t as a no.”
After a minute of silence, Hayes loses his frown. “I only know rumors.”
“I like rumors.”
Still playing with my nipple, he tugs at the hard flesh until it hardens even more.
“Balthazar was a long haul truck driver before I was born. He’d leave Mom for days, even weeks at a time. Apparently, she had an affair. She might have had many of them. Balthazar likely had his own. I don’t want to know about their sex lives, but the rumor is my bio father is an electrician in Common Bend.”
“Have you ever wanted to meet him?”
“I checked up on him, yeah. He had a family and was retired like Balthazar. I considered contacting him, but I didn’t have anything to say. I’d only wanted to find him because Mom hinted I shouldn’t. Once I did, I lost interest in the rest of it.”
“Why would she only hint not to find him?”
“Because she knew straight out telling me not to would only ensure I’d find him.”
“Oh, so you were always a pain in the ass.”
“Since I was sucking my thumb in the womb,” he says, leaning down to suck at my nipple.
I enjoy his attention and fall silent while he goes from sucking to nibbling and then back. When he switches out his lips for fingers, I concentrate long enough to ask another question.
“Does this guy have kids besides you?”
“Yeah.”
“Aren’t you a little interested in having siblings?”
“I considered that too, but they’re not the kind of family I’m interested in having around. They’d want me to loan them money or come to their kids’ birthday parties. I’d be the rich relative they invited to all kinds of stupid shit because they figured I’d just send a gift instead. I don’t need that crap from strangers. I have plenty of employees and acquaintances in White Horse that invite me to crap I won’t go to.”
“That reminds me. I sent a get well gift to Velma Chase from the call center. She called to thank you for your generosity.”
“I wasn’t too generous, was I?” he asks, frowning.
“You were just generous enough to make her feel special, but not so much that she thought you wanted to bang her.”
Junkyard Dog Page 12
