by Umm Zakiyyah
Veronica nodded, still unable to contain her wide smile as she turned forward and murmured a prayer to Allah. She prayed that Inaya’s speech would be an inspiration to all present and an opportunity for others to learn about Islam in a positive light. “O Allah,” she whispered, “even if only from seeing one of Your servants covered in hijab.”
“…and on behalf of Future Hope Baptist Church,” Mrs. Ford said, eliciting a rumbling of chatter and commotion from the press occupying the first rows and the repositioning of the men and women behind the video cameras, “I introduce to you this year’s recipient of both the Distinguished Student Award and the Future Hope Scholarship…Inaya Donald.”
There was a roar of applause, and some of the audience stood, amongst them the teachers at the Islamic weekend school and the friends of Amal and Veronica. Veronica and Anisa also stood for the standing ovation and there were hoots and cheers, inciting in Veronica a sense of pride that made her feel as if her chest would burst.
Tears stung Veronica’s eyes as Mrs. Ford looked to her right, the side of the stage where Inaya would emerge to take her place before the podium.
When Inaya emerged, Veronica was momentarily distracted by the gasps of surprise she heard around her, and her heart raced, sensing something was wrong. Then she lifted her gaze toward the stage to see what was causing the confusion…
***
Inaya made it a point to avoid Mrs. Ford’s gaze as she took confident strides toward the podium. But she knew that the faculty advisor to BOSS would be staring at her dumbfounded…because before this moment Mrs. Ford had had no idea that Inaya was Muslim.
“Then they can see for themselves who’s really superior.”
These were the words that ignited in Inaya a flame of spiritual pride and determination that inspired her to stand before the entire school—and perhaps the world—wearing the very clothes she had tucked away in shame just hours before.
Tears stung her eyes as the audience quieted and she stood behind the podium on stage. Inaya blinked to keep the tears from spilling forth, and she drew in a deep breath in preparation for the speech she had spent so much time preparing.
In that brief moment before she spoke her first words, Inaya was overwhelmed with a longing for her mother. She wished she hadn’t been so selfish in ensuring that Veronica would know nothing of tonight’s program.
I’m proud to be Muslim, Inaya’s heart cried, her lips creased in the beginning of a smile as she lifted her gaze to the auditorium filled with people, and I invite you to share in this love of Allah—in this world and in the Hereafter.
If there was anything that Inaya wanted to show her mother right then, it was this moment. Despite all Veronica’s bickering and lecturing, and Inaya’s outbursts of frustration—and their collective anxiety and tearful prayers, Inaya was a distinguished student offering future hope to the world, only because Veronica was her mother.
For all the annoyance Inaya felt with Veronica’s rigidity, the only stubbornness that Inaya knew could never change was her mother’s overpowering love for her.
Yes, her mother deserved to be there tonight, Inaya thought sadly as she cleared her throat and straightened the notecards in her hands. She whispered a silent prayer to Allah that He would somehow make her mother witness the power of this moment, even if only from a YouTube video or on the local morning news.
Maybe Veronica and Inaya could clip the article from a newspaper and frame it on their walls—and forever hold it close to their hearts.
I love you, Mommy, Inaya’s heart cried. And may Allah love you too. Because after Allah, it is only because of you that I am standing here being honored tonight.
Chapter 24
Another Reward
There was a roar of applause as Inaya stepped away from the podium. As she walked backstage again, she ignored Mrs. Ford, whose expression of scorn was so pronounced that Inaya could almost taste the woman’s disgust.
Inaya halted her steps to pick up her backpack, and she slung it over her shoulder before she continued walking to the exit door backstage. As the door closed behind her, she descended the steps of the empty hall that led to the main auditorium.
Inaya pulled open the auditorium door, and the noise level rose, and she suddenly found herself swarmed by reporters, administrators and friends.
“It appears there was a misunderstanding,” a news anchor said, speaking into a video camera. “Earlier reports suggested that the school reserved its most distinguished award and scholarship for only Christian students. But as we saw tonight, both of these awards were given to Inaya Donald, a Muslim girl who we’re told enrolled in the school earlier this year after living in Saudi Arabia…”
***
Inaya squealed when she saw her mother and Sister Anisa approaching her from the crowd. Laughing, Inaya wedged her way through the swarms of people until she was in front of her mother. Inaya threw her arms around Veronica, and they held each other in a warm embrace.
“How did you find out?” Inaya said after they released each other, Inaya still holding her mother’s hands. Inaya was smiling so widely that her cheeks hurt. She was grateful that her mother and Sister Anisa were not wearing their face veils.
Veronica smiled. “Sister Amal called to congratulate me.”
Inaya laughed and nodded. “I should’ve thought of that.”
“Hey, superstar!”
Inaya turned to find Nasra approaching her with her arms outstretched. Inaya accepted the hug, and when Nasra released her, Inaya saw Sister Amal smiling at her from behind Nasra.
“We’re so proud of you, Inaya,” Amal said. “Really, it was such a blessing to be here tonight.”
***
After chatting with her mother, some friends, and administrators, Inaya rode with Kayla back to Chris’s house.
“Did you hear what happened?” Kayla said as she drove down the highway in the darkness. She glanced at Inaya.
Inaya creased her forehead and looked at her cousin. “No.” She shook her head. “What?”
Kayla smirked. “Lyrica’s pissed off at you.”
Inaya contorted her face in confusion. “Lyrica?”
“Yeah, because you ruined her lawsuit.”
“What?”
Kayla smirked and shook her head. “You showed up in hijab.”
Inaya shook her head, confused. “But she knew all along that I was Muslim.”
“Yeah, but Mrs. Ford didn’t.” Kayla raised an eyebrow. “And neither did Lyrica’s parents.”
Inaya was quiet momentarily. “She told her parents I was Christian?”
“Let’s just call it the sin of omission.” Kayla grinned. “I think she just decided not to tell them you weren’t.”
“And how is that my fault?”
“Well, to win the lawsuit, they have to prove the school favors Christians,” Kayla said. “How can they do that now that the world just saw an obvious Muslim take both awards? And from a church-funded scholarship too.” Kayla shook her head, smiling. “If anything, this shows how open-minded the school and church are.”
Inaya grunted. “I wouldn’t call them open-minded. At least not if Mrs. Ford has anything to do with it.”
“I second that,” Kayla said, humor in her tone. “But come next week, I think even Mrs. Ford is going to be thanking you.”
“Yeah right. I’ll be lucky if she doesn’t crucify me,” Inaya said, grunting laughter. “No pun intended.”
Kayla laughed. “Well, between me and you, I overhead some of the administration talking about suspending her.”
Inaya’s eyes widened as she looked at Kayla. “Are you serious?”
“Well, I think the term was ‘mandatory leave of absence.’”
“Wow. So they know what she’s been doing?”
“Who knows?” Kayla shrugged. “They may have known all along and just turned a blind eye.” She huffed. “Like schools usually do. But now with all the media attention and threats of litigation, it forces them
to at least look like they care.”
“This is all one big mess,” Inaya said with a sigh.
“Not really,” Kayla said. “I think it’s all for the best.” She chuckled. “Who would’ve known that your last-minute decision to throw on a hijab would solve everything for everyone?”
Inaya was silent momentarily. “Except for Lyrica.”
Kayla waved her hand dismissively. “She needs to get over herself if you ask me.”
Inaya stared at Kayla. “I would’ve never expected you to say that.”
Kayla shrugged. “She’s my best friend, but that doesn’t mean I agree with everything she does.”
Kayla was silent momentarily. “Okay,” Kayla said with a sigh, “I do think Mrs. Ford deserved the lawsuit though. But not the whole school. Lyrica could’ve solved her complaints internally if she really felt she was being wronged.”
Inaya looked out the window beside her. “Maybe.”
“Life is life,” Kayla said with a shrug. “My parents say there are some things you just have to live with. You can’t fight the world every time things don’t go your way.”
“You sound like my mom,” Inaya said, rolling her eyes, a reflective smile on her face. “She always says you have to learn to live with people’s imperfections. ‘There’s only one fight worth fighting every time,’” Inaya mocked with a smirk. “‘And that’s the one against your own imperfections.’”
Kayla nodded thoughtfully. “Well, she’s right.”
Chapter 25
A New Beginning
“Surprise!”
Inaya brought a hand to her mouth, and her eyes grew large as she walked through the front door of her father’s house.
Chris, Dana, and Kayla’s parents (Anthony and his wife) stood in front of Inaya with their arms outstretched in welcome. A large banner that read “Congratulations!” hung on a side wall decorated by colorful streamers and balloons.
“Oh my God,” Inaya said as she stepped inside, laughter in her voice. Kayla grinned as she closed the door behind them. “When did you guys plan this?” Inaya said, shaking her head.
“While you were busy planning how to keep the honor’s program secret,” Chris said as he walked toward Inaya and drew her into a hug, brushing her forehead with a kiss.
“Sorry about that,” Inaya said, her voice subdued as a smile lingered on her face.
“No worries.” Chris waved his hand. “I was a teenager once, believe it or not, so I know how it feels.”
“We’re proud of you,” Dana said, appearing at Chris’s side and squeezing Inaya’s hand. “We really look forward to watching the YouTube video.”
“YouTube?” Anthony said from behind them, humor in his tone. “I’m looking forward to the Oprah interview.”
They all laughed.
“Why don’t we get something to eat?” Dana asked, rubbing her hands together and heading for the kitchen.
***
The doorbell rang while Inaya sat on the couch laughing at something her father had said. Kayla and Anthony sat on either side of her while Chris and Dana stood in front of them. They had all finished eating a half hour before.
“I’ll get it,” Dana said, a smile still on her face as she walked to the door.
“Sorry I’m late.”
Inaya looked up to find Raymond approaching the couch, a grin on his face and a wrapped gift in hand.
Inaya stopped laughing, a half smile frozen on her face as she met his gaze. Her heart skipped a beat, and for a moment she forgot about how she had given up hope of anything beyond friendship.
“As-salaamu’alaikum,” Raymond greeted as he handed Inaya the gift box.
“Wa’alaiku-mus-salaam,” Inaya replied, averting her gaze, a hesitant grin on her face.
“What?” Kayla said, prompting Inaya and Raymond to look toward her. “You too?”
Raymond smiled and nodded. “Yep,” he said, an embarrassed expression on his face. “I’m Muslim now.”
“No way!” Kayla laughed.
“Oh can we please avoid the topic of religion for once?” Dana said good-naturedly. “I don’t want Chris to get started.”
Chris grinned playfully at his fiancée. “Well, you can’t avoid the topic of your soul forever, sweetheart.”
“Here we go again.” Dana rolled her eyes, a smirk on her face. “I focus on my soul every Sunday. Today’s Friday.”
“Life is short,” Raymond said with a chuckle. “Now’s as good a time as any.”
“How’s Lyrica?” Dana wore a pleasant smile as she looked at Raymond, purposefully changing the subject.
“She’s good,” Raymond said. There was an awkward silence, and Inaya felt uncomfortable.
“Hey, boss,” Raymond said looking at Inaya, a smile on his face, “are you up for a quick walk?” He nodded his head toward the door.
Inaya’s heart raced, but she maintained her composure. “Sure,” she said, shrugging.
“Must be a really special gift,” Kayla teased.
“It is,” Raymond said, smiling at Kayla as he glanced over his shoulder.
Inaya followed Raymond outside and closed the door behind them. “We can sit here,” Raymond said, pointing to the porch steps.
“That was a quick walk,” Inaya said jokingly.
Raymond chuckled as he sat on the second step, Inaya following suit, sitting a comfortable distance from him.
“It was just an excuse to steal you for a second,” he said.
Inaya smiled to herself, but she didn’t say anything. They sat without speaking for some time.
“So I guess Lyrica isn’t the best student of religion, huh?” Raymond said, humor in his tone.
Inaya’s heart constricted at the mention of Lyrica, but she maintained a smile. “Actually, I’m not such a good teacher.”
“I think you are.”
Inaya drew in a deep breath as the familiar anxiety returned. So many people expected so much of her. Sometimes she wished people could just see her as the normal human being she was. Why did Raymond imagine she could help him maintain his relationship with Lyrica, of all things? Didn’t he see that Inaya had feelings of her own?
Inaya grunted. “Well, I doubt Lyrica thinks so.”
Raymond shrugged. “So what? That doesn’t mean she’s right.”
Inaya started to respond but realized what she wanted to say was better left unspoken.
Yes, Raymond was right. Just because Lyrica thought negatively of Inaya didn’t mean it was true. But it did mean that Inaya had failed Raymond in what meant the most to him.
And that meant that Inaya had failed in what meant the most to her.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t help,” Inaya said quietly.
Raymond drew in a deep breath and leaned back slightly. He was silent for some time. “I’m sorry too,” he said finally.
The sadness Inaya felt at these words was so overwhelming that she was glad she was sitting. She blinked back the moisture in her eyes and looked away, mortified that she was so affected by Raymond’s disappointment. What was wrong with her?
“I shouldn’t have put that burden on you,” he said regretfully. “I should’ve taken it on myself.” He drew in a deep breath. “Like I should’ve faced Mrs. Ford.”
“It’s okay,” Inaya said. “Allah is the best planner.”
Raymond nodded as his gaze grew distant. “I wish I had as much faith as you.”
Inaya sighed. There it was again. As flattering as his words were, Inaya didn’t like being put on a pedestal. She was full of faults like everyone else. She wasn’t perfect— which was why she couldn’t calm the desire she felt for Raymond right then.
“Raymond,” Inaya said finally, her voice exhausted, “I don’t have as much faith as you think. If I did, I wouldn’t have put on one face at home and another at school.”
He creased his forehead and glanced at her curiously. “What you do mean?”
Her eyes widened slightly as she met his gaze. “This,” s
he said, tugging on the cloth of her fuchsia khimaar. “Didn’t you notice I wasn’t wearing it to school?”
“Yes,” he said, his expression confused. “But that doesn’t change who you are on the inside.”
Inaya shook her head, realizing that Raymond would probably never understand. “Maybe,” she said with a sigh. “But it does show how weak I am on the inside.”
Raymond looked perplexed, but he shrugged. “I’m still learning a lot about Islam, so I’m sure you know more than I do. But I don’t see why it’s such a big deal. If anything, it shows how weak the school is. It’s obvious you felt forced to change your appearance.”
Inaya considered his words momentarily then glanced at him curiously. “What makes you say that?”
He drew his eyebrows together and met her gaze. “Am I wrong?”
Inaya looked away, her thoughts drifting to how difficult it had been to live a double life. But she had wanted to fit in at school; no one had forced her to feel that way.
“I don’t know,” she said finally.
They were quiet, and their gazes and thoughts became distant momentarily.
Raymond broke the silence and handed Inaya the wrapped gift. “Just a little something to say congratulations,” he said, a subdued smile on his face.
Inaya’s spirits lifted slightly as she accepted the gift, but a sense of sadness tugged at her heart. Why couldn’t she abandon her fairytale dreams? Would she ever get over her desire to one day marry Raymond?
Inaya held the box, unsure what to do. She was curious to see what was inside, but she didn’t want to offend Raymond by opening the gift in front of him.
“Open it,” he said, humor in his tone. “I want to see your reaction.”
Inaya glanced at him suspiciously, a smirk on her face. “Why?”
