If I let him leave, would I ever be able to get him back?
Wasn’t having him back in my life what I had been longing for since he walked out on me?
On leaden feet, I pushed my way through the crowd of gyrating bodies, ducking as arms flew out as part of the dance. I burst out of the ballroom into the hotel corridor. Looking left and right, I wasn’t sure which way he had gone.
Lifting up the hem of my floor length dress, I raced to the left hoping it was the right way. I rounded the corner and spotted him making his way to the valet stand across the lobby. Kicking off my shoes, I sprinted through the lobby, knocking into unsuspecting patrons and weaving around bags of luggage.
“Ben!” I called out just as he was handing his ticket over. “Wait!”
He said something to the valet, who nodded and stepped back. Ben pocketed his ticket and faced in my direction. He looked at me with a perplexed expression that gave nothing else away.
I skidded to a halt in front of him, out of breath and oblivious to what I was going to say.
When I finally caught my breath, I admitted something to him that scared the living shit out of me. “I knew it was you the first time I saw you in Philadelphia.”
“What was me?” he asked with a confused expression on his face.
“That you were the one,” I whispered feeling vulnerable and raw in that moment.
“Really? I thought you said I was a pig that night?” he teased and I relaxed a little.
“You were—which was a disappointment—but I meant the next day. You were on your knees in front of me and as soon as our eyes met, I just had this feeling of... of...”
“Completeness?” he offered.
“Yes. It was the most profound yet scariest thing I ever felt. After Scott screwed me over, I swore I would never get involved with someone who acted like you did the night before so I refused to admit what I was feeling was real. I tried to stay away from you, but every time I tried to put that wall up between us, you found a way to draw me out of it.”
“So why did you leave me after what happened in the bathroom? Even you couldn’t deny that we had amazing chemistry together. That wasn’t a fluke.”
God I really hated talking about all this. Saying it out loud made me seem so foolish and stupid.
“I only went back with Scott to stay away from you. I knew you’d come after me and he just seemed like the safer choice. Those few weeks we were back together all I could do was think about you. That’s why he ended up going back to his wife, because I wouldn’t... you know...” I whispered.
He cracked a smile at my choice of words but thankfully let it go. “And the other day? When you kicked me out?”
I shook my head and placed my hand on his arm, wishing I had more contact with him at that moment. Admitting everything inside of me wasn’t easy and I longed for his support.
“I didn’t kick you out.”
“You did. You took me outside and—” I placed my finger over his lip to stop him.
“I took you outside to explain to you that Scott was there to apologize. He had showed up right before you got there. I was in the middle of changing and told him to wait downstairs while I finished. When I heard you, I came downstairs even though I hadn’t finished dressing.”
“But he was all disheveled.”
“He showed up that way. He had just found out his wife was pregnant with a daughter. He realized he had to become a better man for her. I was actually a little surprised, but I owed it to him and myself to hear him out. I didn’t want you punching him before I could.”
“Why didn’t you just say all this before?” His face was hard and he looked pissed at me.
“I was going to and then you started assuming and it was all ‘hello pot meet kettle’ so I let you just keep on doing it.” I shrugged and apologized. “I’m sorry. I know it was childish.”
“I don’t know what to say,” he muttered.
“Say you won’t leave. That you’ll give me another chance,” I pleaded
“Why should I? You put me through the ringer, Clarissa. I don’t like not knowing where I stand with someone and then finding out where I think I stand is completely wrong.”
“It was right. I was just too afraid to tell you.”
He sighed and gave me an uncertain look. I supposed I deserved that considering the way I acted before. I knew right then that it was a go big or go home moment for us. So I took a deep, fortifying breath and decided to go big.
“I love you, Ben. You can’t walk away from me because neither of us are ever going to find something better than what we have when we’re together.”
His face broke out into a wide smile and before I knew it, I was in his arms and his tongue glided against mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on tight as he made love to my mouth. Happy tears stung my eyes when he pulled back to look up at me.
“I love you too, sweetheart. From the bottom of my soul.”
I laughed and kissed him again. When we broke apart, I realized we had an audience.
“Will you take me home?” I asked him.
He tightened his hold on me and pulled me closer. With our foreheads touching he whispered with a ferocity I had never heard from him before, “Anything for you.”
And I knew he meant that without a doubt.
What can I say? I’m a lucky girl. The luckiest. Because it isn’t every day a sweet, loving man like Ben Harris hands you the world. So when he does, make sure you grab it with both hands and never let it go.
EPILOGUE
Ben
I was going to puke with all the nerves buzzing around inside me. It wasn’t that I was afraid of what I was about to do. It was that I was afraid it wasn’t going to be perfect. It needed to be perfect. This story would get retold over and over after today and I didn’t want to be known as the prince charming gone bad.
“Dinner was delicious.” Rissa set her napkin down and took a sip of her wine.
“Thanks,” I mumbled absentmindedly.
“Are you okay? You’ve been acting weirder than normal tonight.” She gave me a scrutinizing look that had beads of sweat forming on my forehead.
“I’m not weird,” I informed her.
“Right. Sorry, I forgot.” She shook her head with a small smile. “Seriously. What has you all sweaty and fidgety?”
“Why don’t we have dessert?” I asked instead of answering her. Well I guess I answered in a roundabout way seeing as how dessert was what had me acting this way.
“Why don’t you answer me?” She raised a suspicious eyebrow my way that almost had me caving.
“It must have been something I ate earlier.” I stood up and walked into the kitchen, desperate to get away from her enquiring mind.
“Meredith was showing me paint samples today for the twins’ bedroom. Her theme is two peas in a pod. Everything in the catalogs was so damn cute,” Rissa called out from the dining room table.
“Oh yeah?” I chimed in and then only half-listened as she went on describing everything in detail.
I guess you could say Tanner and Meredith surprised the shit out of everyone when they eloped in Vegas and announced she was pregnant with twins. We were all happy for them. They were a perfect fit together after all and Tanner seemed to be settling into impending fatherhood with surprising ease. I think he was more excited for their arrival than even Meredith.
Although my mother had a lock on being the most excited. Her house was already baby proofed with a nursery set up in Tanner’s old bedroom. She said mine and Rissa’s kids could go in my old room. I hated to tell her, but she would have to wait a while for that one.
A few minutes later I came back from the kitchen carrying the tray of chocolate covered strawberries. Rissa squealed when she saw them and grabbed the tray from me.
“You can only have one,” she told me after counting them.
“I think I’ll have two,” I countered.
“No. There’s five here and you know I
don’t do uneven numbers.” She stuck her lip out in an adorable little pout.
“Fine. But you have to feed me then.”
“Okay.”
“While sitting in my lap.” I pat my lap and gave her a lascivious grin.
“You don’t need to ask me twice.” She rounded the table and parked her sweet tush in my lap. Her fingers picked up a plump strawberry and brought it to my lips. I took a bite and let the crispiness wash over my tongue.
Rissa slammed her mouth on mine and tasted me. Pulling back she wiped the corners of her mouth. “That tastes good on you. Now it’s my turn.”
I fed the other strawberries to her as she sat in my lap. She sipped the champagne I had poured us earlier and let out a contented sigh.
“This was a great anniversary. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” I kissed her lips quickly and pulled the package from my pants pocket. She had to be wondering when she was going to get her gift. She gave me mine earlier, and it was so hard to only thank her and not reciprocate, but that would have ruined everything I had planned.
“This is for you.” I set the jewelry box on the table and her eyes darted to mine. I saw the question in them. We had been together for two years today and I had yet to ask the question. “Open it,” I encouraged her.
Her hands shook as she picked up the velvet box. As she slowly opened it, I held my breath.
Inside sat two conversation hearts. The first said I love you. The second said Marry me.
It had taken a lot of boxes of candy on Valentine’s Day to find the two I wanted, but I hadn’t stopped until I had two perfectly printed hearts.
“Oh my God,” she whispered. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she looked from the box to me.
“Will you do me the honor of spending the rest of your life with me?”
“Yes!” she exclaimed, throwing her arms around me and giving me a hard kiss.
My breath left me in a whoosh at her pronouncement. I reached back into my pocket to pull out her two carat cushion cut ring. The same one I knew she wanted thanks to Meredith. Rissa held out her hand and I slid the metallic symbol of my undying devotion to her on her finger.
It was the perfect night and to this day the conversation hearts sit in a glass box on her dresser.
*****
I walked through the event hall with long, determined strides. I needed to find Rissa. It had been two days since I saw her. Two very long days.
I spotted Meredith’s banner towards the back of the room and I made a beeline for it. Various women tried to stop me on my way but I was focused and brushed them off with an ease I had mastered over the last four years helping Meredith and Cassandra out at signings.
As soon as Clarissa came into sight, I scooped her up from where she sat and kissed her long and hard. Catcalls went on around us, but I didn’t care. I missed her and now that she was with me everything seemed right in the world again.
“I missed you,” I groaned in her ear as her hands ran enticingly up and down my back.
“Me too.”
“I slept with your pillow last night. I spooned it pretending it was you,” I admitted.
“That has to be one of the sweetest things you’ve ever told me.” Her lip quivered, and I wanted to kick myself for making her cry.
“Sorry, sweetheart.” I wiped a stray tear that leaked out of the corner of her eye with my thumb.
“Show him your shirt,” Meredith hollered from behind us.
I went to step back to see what she was talking about, but Rissa’s arms tightened around me.
“I thought you were going to be here earlier,” she started to explain.
“I know. My flight was delayed due to an electrical storm.”
“Well see, I wouldn’t have put it on earlier and let everyone else see it if I had known.”
“I don’t understand what you’re getting at. Just show me,” I said impatiently.
This time when I pulled away she let me.
“For real?” I asked when I got a good look at her shirt.
“For real,” she confirmed with a shaky smile.
“We’re having a boy!” I shouted at the top of my lungs causing everyone in the room to turn and stare at us. I looked down at Rissa and exclaimed, “A son!”
“A son,” she concurred.
“I love you so much,” I said over and over again as I kissed Rissa’s sweet face. I’d never be able to thank her enough for being the perfect woman, partner, lover, and friend a man could ever know. She continued to show me every day how perfect life can be and I would never take that for granted.
“I knew you’d like it,” Meredith chimed in close enough now that she didn’t need to scream.
“What’s not to like?” I glanced back down at Rissa’s baby bump and ran my hands over the three words written there...
Future man candy.
The End
Acknowledgements
With each book, I feel like my acknowledgements just don’t do justice to the amount of love and support I receive from people as I pursue my dreams. Reaching for the stars isn’t easy. It’s scary and nerve-wracking. It’s stress and late night sessions with my laptop where I want to pull my hair out. Without strong people at my back, I’d never be able to achieve all I have. So, even though my thank you’s are brief, please know that I am forever grateful for you—even when I don’t say it enough!
Thank you to my husband, Dave, for listening to me and putting up with my idiosyncrasies. You are my better half—no doubt about it. Unless I want to strangle you of course. Then it’s most definitely your fault, not mine!
Thank you to my family for all their love and support. You guys give me that push I need to continue sometimes. Love you guys!
A special thank you to my beta readers: Melissa Saneholtz, Debi Barnes, Jennie Wurtz, Bianca Smith, Miranda Sue Johnson, and Sammy Campos. I can never say enough wonderful things about you ladies!
An I-love-you-from-the-bottom-of-my-heart shout out for Miranda Sue Johnson. You are the piece I didn’t know was missing. It’s scary how alike we think, but that just makes us more fabulous!
To the Naughty Girls & Jewels – Forever and always keep your minds in the gutter!
Last, but certainly not least, thank you to the bloggers who support me. There are too many of you to mention, but know I will never take for granted the hard work you do for authors and I am deeply appreciative for your generosity.
And to all the fans out there—you guys make all these crazy hours and stressful deadlines worth it! XOXO
About the Author
Jessica is the author of the Love Square & Concierge series. She grew up in Central New York, where she currently lives with her husband and three dogs. Her days are spent as a Security Analyst at an IT consulting company. In her free time, she enjoys reading books and developing ideas for her own stories. Writing is her secret passion that she's been fostering since elementary school, when she wrote her first book about a puppy. It has always been a dream of hers to be able to share her stories with the world.
Other Books by Jessica:
Love Square Series
Love Square
His Ever After
Their Merry Little Christmas
Bound in Blue
Concierge Series
Love, Your Concierge
Forever Your Concierge
Standalone Titles
Urban Love Prophecy
The Taste of Mr. Davenport (Erotic Novella)
Man Candy
Connect with Jessica Online:
Web - www.jessicaingro.com
Email - [email protected]
Facebook - www.facebook.com/jessicaingrobooks
Pinterest - www.pinterest.com/jessicaingro
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