It couldn’t be wrong when it felt so right, and even if it was wrong to be kissing her dead husband’s brother, the sensations were so incredibly wonderful, she didn’t care. She didn’t want to go beyond kisses, she told herself, but she couldn’t bear for them to end either.
She broke away from his mouth and trailed her lips down his neck. She traced his jaw with her tongue and then was kissing him again. She devoured his mouth like a starving woman, giving into her own wants and needs. His strong hands cupped her breasts, kneading the aching nipples. Her wrap had fallen to the ground, allowing his agile fingers to slip under the thin straps of her dress and tug the bodice down. He dropped to his knees and took her breasts in his mouth, giving them equal time and attention. She threaded her fingers through his hair, holding his head, and thought she would die from pleasure.
Exquisite erotic feelings coursed through her body. How could she have forgotten how good a man’s mouth could feel? But she was pretty sure it wouldn’t feel this incredible if that mouth didn’t belong to this particular man.
She opened her eyes, looking down at his tousled sandy hair, and pulled his head back up to hers. With her eyes wide open, she kissed him slowly, sweetly, deeply. This man had reawakened her as a woman. She didn’t know what she would do when he left, but until that moment arrived she intended to give him everything she had.
“Ryan. Let’s go inside.”
He stood up slowly, leaving her eye level with his belt buckle. Even in the moonlight she could see the strength of his arousal.
She stood up also, cupping him as she did so. Her mouth grazed his. “I want you.”
“Are you sure about this?”
She gave a throaty laugh. “Oh, yes. I’m sure.”
His hands skimmed her breasts. “You are so beautiful, Leila, and I want you more than anything.”
“Why do I sense there’s a ‘but’ coming?”
“But I came here to do the right thing. Help you and Callie. Not romance my brother’s wife. Nick is probably rolling over in his grave right now. He’d skin me alive if he knew I was touching you like this.”
His palms were still cupping her breasts, his thumbs running lightly over her nipples. He hadn’t moved his hands away, and if he was waiting for her to remove them, he’d be waiting a long time.
“Forget Nick. I’m sure he’d rather it be you than some stranger.” She didn’t want to think about Nick right now. She didn’t want to think, period.
“Shit. I shouldn’t be doing this.” He grabbed her shoulders, pulling her to him. His mouth ravished hers, then he pulled back enough to straighten her dress and cover her again. She stared at him in disappointment, but he shook his head as he guided her inside. “I don’t think I have the strength to walk away from you, even if you asked me to.”
She touched his cheek. “Let me go check on Callie, and if she’s still fast asleep I’ll meet you in your bedroom.”
“Don’t be long,” he whispered.
She tiptoed into Callie’s room. She could hear the girl’s heavy breathing, so she slipped back out and entered Ryan’s room. His back was to her as he turned down the bed.
“I’m all yours.”
He turned swiftly and pulled her into his arms. They fell onto the bed, bodies pressed close as they kissed and kissed.
Leila was on a roller coaster ride of emotions, highs and lows, thrills and fears. It had been so long and she was so needy. Was she doing the right thing? Should she stop this before it went any further? What if their feelings for each other showed? What would her daughter think? Or her mother? And after loving him, how would she ever let him go?
With one hand he unzipped her dress, then began easing it off her. Eagerly she helped, sliding the dress down over her hips, pulling her panties off with it.
He groaned. “God, you are so beautiful. You don’t mind if I taste every inch of you, do you? I think I need to do that.”
“Uh—no.” Her breath hitched in her throat. “But you have to be naked too.” She undid the rest of the buttons on his shirt, and he struggled out of it, tossing it on the floor. Her nimble fingers unzipped his fly and his manhood was released.
He was bigger than she expected, and smooth and silky.
“Ryan.” She bit his shoulder. “God. I want you.”
He got rid of his pants and turned his attention back to her. He spread her legs and tucked his head between them, licking her sweetly. She arched her back and bit her lip to stop her cries of pleasure.
“Yes, yes,” she whispered.
He licked harder and faster, while his hands played with her nipples. Leila held on to the headboard as ripples of explosion spread like shock waves through her body.
When he lifted his head, she urged him up her body and kissed him longingly. “Please, no more. Let me bring you some pleasure.”
She pushed him onto his back and took him into her mouth, running her tongue up and down the hard, slick shaft, flicking lightly over the head. She didn’t stop when he moaned her name.
Finally, he pulled her body on top of his. He entered her and she gasped. She had been more than ready, but the shock of his cock filling her was so much better than she’d believed it could be.
She rocked against him, and their eyes never left each other.
Whatever happened after tonight was worth this moment. For this one night only, she was going to love this man.
And she did.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Callie woke up the next morning with her mother next to her in the queen size bed. She had never shared a bedroom with her mom before and now she watched her sleep. She looked exhausted, and Callie wondered what time she had come to bed.
Had she stayed up late and watched TV with Uncle Ryan? They seemed to like each other, and if she could have any wish in the world, besides a new kidney, it would be to keep Ryan in their lives. He was going to be a living part of her—didn’t he get that? But maybe it wasn’t the same for him, because she was on the receiving end and he was on the giving end. She yawned. It was useless thinking about it, because even if she did feel this special bond, it wouldn’t make any difference. He owned a business in Australia, a fantastic cruise boat, and took all these interesting people out to the reefs and taught them to scuba dive. With such a glamorous life, why would he care about a dumb sick girl like her? He hadn’t even known she existed until about a month ago and was only doing this for his brother’s sake. Once the transplant was completed, his obligation would be done.
Unless he fell in love with her mother. Then he would want to stick around.
Callie smiled and began to hum. Her mother’s eyes cracked open.
“What time is it?” she whispered.
Callie checked the bedside clock. “It’s eight. Boy, you never sleep this late. What did you do last night? Stay up and watch old movies?”
Callie watched with interest as a definite blush spread over her mother’s cheeks. “No. We stayed up for a while, but I had trouble sleeping. Something kept me awake.”
“You’re not worried about me, are you? Not this weekend. We promised Ryan that we’d put our worries on hold.”
“I’m more excited than worried. Actually, I can’t remember being this happy in years.” Her mother yawned and stretched, and then sprang out of bed. “I’m going to take a quick shower. We’ll probably go out for breakfast and then go down to the beach for a few hours.”
“Sounds good. I think I hear Uncle Ryan in the kitchen. Maybe he and I can go get some breakfast stuff while you’re showering.”
“Good idea. Go ask.”
Callie slipped out of bed, grabbed her bathrobe, and went to find her uncle.
He was rummaging around the kitchen just as she had thought.
“You hungry?” she asked with a bright smile. “Mom’s showering and I thought maybe you and I could go pick up some food or something. I mean, if you like.”
“I like. I like a lot.” He grinned and rumpled her hair. “Go dress
and then we’ll do a grocery run.”
As they drove to the nearest store, Callie noticed her uncle was quite chatty. Grinning a lot too. He hadn’t been like that the few times he’d taken her to school. Then he’d been grumpy, and she’d figured he wasn’t a morning person, just like her. Maybe it was because they were here at a beautiful beach, like he was used to, and not in boring old Princeton driving some dumb kid to school.
“You seem in a good mood.” She looked at him suspiciously. “You planning something special?”
“How about we go sailing today?”
“Wow! You mean it? That would be ultra cool.”
He laughed. “I was hoping you wouldn’t mind.”
“Mind? Are you nuts? I’m going to love it.”
“Good. That’s settled then.” He parked in front of the grocery store. “So tell me. What do you and your mom like for breakfast?”
“Mom doesn’t eat much. She’s always too busy. We usually just have cereal and fruit in the morning. Bacon and eggs on the weekend.”
“Well, it’s the weekend, so I say we do it up right.”
They walked through the aisles, and Ryan filled the basket with eggs, Canadian bacon, English muffins, and a package of Hollandaise sauce.
“Ever had eggs Benedict?” he asked.
“Mom used to make it for special occasions. Christmas, birthdays. We haven’t had it since Dad died.”
“Well, it’s time you did. This weekend is a special occasion and we’re celebrating with eggs Benedict.”
* * *
After Ryan made their delicious breakfast, he and Callie left to go sailing. Leila dropped her book and towel on a beach chair and went for a walk.
It had been years since she’d been in the Hamptons, years since she had enjoyed a walk on the beach. There were so many things she hadn’t done since Nick’s death, preferring to keep them as memories, rather than to do those activities without him. Had she been unfair to Callie by breaking with their traditions? And when was the last time she and Callie had gone away together, or taken an actual vacation?
Of course, they both had grieved that first year. And she had had to go back to graduate school to get her doctorate, so she could teach at the college level. There had been little time for holidays, and no money to spare.
Unconsciously, she began walking faster, as if to leave the past behind. Memories were best sealed away. Oh, she could take out good ones every now and then, but dwelling on the past was too painful and pointless. Fact was—the five years since her husband’s death had been a nightmare.
That first year it had been hard enough just to get up in the morning, to put one foot ahead of the other, to take care of her daughter, when all she’d wanted was to climb into a hole and die. Then Callie got sick, and her father died, and if she’d known that if she had one more tragedy in her life, she would go mad.
Leila picked up her pace, breaking into a sweat.
Nick had been the best thing that had ever happened to her. He’d been handsome, charming, bright, and successful, and had made her feel as though she were extraordinary too. She’d always wondered why he had fallen in love with her when he could have had his choice of beautiful, successful women.
What would he think of her today? Would he understand her need to sleep with Ryan? Her heart was racing and she felt almost physically sick, but she didn’t slow her pace.
She was not in love with Ryan. She loved him, but not the way she’d loved Nick. Nick had been her heart. As for Ryan… Of course he physically excited her. He was a walking orgasm, for heaven’s sake. The man was sexy as sin, and she could only imagine how he’d been in his wild youth. Girls would have thrown themselves at him, and she was pretty sure they still did.
She understood her physical attraction, but when she was with him her emotions were a wild tangle. Of course, gratitude played an important role, but she’d never sleep with a man simply because she felt indebted to him. Hell, if that were the case, she would have slept with half the men she worked with, who had been so supportive since Callie had fallen ill. No, her feelings for Ryan were more complicated. She wanted him physically, and he filled an aching need in her heart. She would miss him tremendously when he left, but she could deal with that. She was getting used to living in the moment and not dreaming of a future.
* * *
Leila was sitting in a beach chair reading a book, and trying to ignore her rumbling tummy, when Ryan and Callie suddenly appeared.
“Mom!” Callie called, waving madly.
Leila shaded her eyes, smiling and waving at the twosome. Ryan was carrying a brown bag that she hoped was filled with food. It was two o’clock, after all. He plunked it down on her tummy, with a wink and a smile.
“Lobster rolls,” he said proudly.
“You read my mind.” She picked up the bag and sat up. She was in a black one-piece bathing suit today. After all the things they’d done to each other the night before, she’d felt a need for modesty.
“Hi honey,” she said to Callie. “Did you have fun?”
“It was awesome. Uncle Ryan had to hoist the sails and do all the work. I wasn’t strong enough.” She shrugged. “Still, it was so nice being out on the ocean again. I can’t believe how I missed it.”
“You must be exhausted. Come sit down.”
Callie sank into the lounge chair beside Leila’s, while Ryan plopped down on the sand.
“We stopped at a roadside lobster shack and got three rolls,” he said. “Hope you waited.”
“I did.” Her eyes didn’t quite meet his. “Thanks.”
He opened the bag and pulled one out. “I’m starved. Dig in.”
He passed the bag around, and both she and Callie took one. Leila removed the plastic wrap and sank her teeth into the soft roll, loaded with fresh lobster. “Ahhhh, this is so good,” she said, sighing in ecstasy.
Callie bit into hers. “Mmmm. This is yum. Is it better than kangaroo stew, Uncle Ryan?”
“Only slightly.” He picked up a piece of lobster that had fallen on Leila’s bare thigh. “Yummy is right. And you deserve it for being such a trooper out there today.” He explained to Leila, “We had some pretty strong wind at times, but she held the rudder and kept the boat on track. Good little sailor you’ve got here.”
Callie beamed. “Good teacher is more like it. First Dad, and now you.”
“We’ll have to do it again next summer when you come to visit me,” he said, looking deliberately at Leila.
She felt a familiar rush of heat and quickly dropped her gaze to her lobster roll. She simply couldn’t look at Ryan. He was shirtless, and the sight of his tanned chest, his long, slender thighs revealed by his khaki shorts, had her thinking all kinds of improper thoughts.
They were flying home in a few hours, and though she would be sorry to leave, they had to get back for school in the morning. Maybe once Callie was asleep, she and Ryan could prolong the weekend a little.
“You will come, won’t you?” he said with a teasing smile, as if he had read her mind.
“I’m sure I will… I mean, we will,” she said, and blushed.
“Good. I’m going to hold you fast…to that promise.” He winked, and Leila wished he would keep this sexual banter to a minimum. She didn’t want Callie catching on.
“Mom? Is he flirting with you?”
Leila forced herself to laugh. “No, don’t be silly. We’re too old for that kind of stuff.”
“One is never too old for a little harmless flirting, isn’t that right, Callie?”
She shrugged. “I dunno.” She wiggled her toes and giggled. “I wish Anton would flirt with me.”
“Who the hell is Anton?” Ryan asked, suddenly sounding very fatherly.
“He’s the new French boy in her school,” Leila said. “He was in summer school with her. All the girls think he’s hot.”
“Stay away from French boys,” Ryan said, looking unhappy. “And you’re too young to date.”
“Says
who?” Callie looked at her mom for affirmation. “You don’t think so, do you? I mean, if he asked me to a movie or something, you wouldn’t say no.” She adjusted her sunglasses. “Not that he would ask me right now, looking the way I do. But when I’m better.”
“When you’re better, I would say yes to Anton,” Leila said, grinning at Ryan.
“As long as she doesn’t say yes to Anton,” he mumbled.
Callie laughed. “No worries about that.” She wrinkled her nose at him. “I’m going to take a vow of chastity. At least until I’m sixteen.”
“Okay, enough talk about that,” he said loudly. “What are we going to do for the rest of the afternoon?”
“I’m gonna take a nap,” Callie said, getting up to leave. “I’m pooped from all that exercise. Sailing’s hard work.”
“Yup, it is.” He took the chair that Callie had vacated. “Go rest, young lady. We’ll need to leave here around four. I don’t want to be flying in the dark.”
“Okay,” Callie said as she walked away. “Have fun you two.”
Ryan looked at her. “Shall we have fun?”
“Uh—how do you mean?”
He laughed. “Well, I have a few ideas, but they may have to wait until dark.” He ran a hand lightly down her thigh. “Unless you have a better solution.”
“I don’t, and I wish you’d stop touching me like that.” She pushed his hand away and frowned.
“Oh, really?” He cocked an eyebrow. “And why would that be? Because it’s getting you hot and bothered?”
She had to laugh. “You really are impossible, and yes, if you want to know the truth. It is, and it’s not practical.”
“Why do you always have to be practical?”
“Because someone has to be.”
“I thought you were the romantic one.”
“That too.”
He looked at her. “I’d like to kiss you right now.”
“In public? No, I don’t think so.”
“Just a little one?” He inched closer and touched her mouth with his. “There. That wasn’t too bad, was it?”
“No, not too bad.” She licked her lips and gazed into his eyes.
ESCAPE INTO ROMANCE- 4 Book Bundle Page 16
