The Beginning of Us
Brandy Jeffus Corona
The Beginning of Us
Copyright © 2014 by Brandy Jeffus Corona
This novel is entirely a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictionally. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or person, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
http://brandyjeffuscorona.webs.com/
Edited by: Robyn M. Pierce
www.Robynmpierce.com
Cover art & design by: Stephanie White of Steph’s Cover Design
http://www.stephscoverdesign.com/
“Love doesn't quit, it just gets hard sometimes. If it were easy, it wouldn't mean as much.”
-J. M.
Dedicated to my husband, love you mostest.
Prologue
March 1, 2030
Her face remained a blank canvas. Her world went deaf and the quiet was a welcome reprieve. She could see him standing in front of her, his face red with frustration, his brows permanently furrowed. She knew that he was angry with her. She had pushed him to the brink and he was retaliating against her bitch fest.
This is what it's come down to, she thought. Fight, fight, get along. Hate, hate, love.
Teegan Donney could feel the tears welling up, threatening to flow from her eyes. Finally, Jaxon's screaming ceased and now he simply stared at her. He took a deep, shuddering breath.
"It's always something with you. Always nag, nag, nag. Nothing's ever good enough. I'm done, Teegan. I don't need this." Jax's voice was normal now. His voice hinted at how tired, winded, and worn down he'd become.
"I know," Teegan answered, her voice barely above a whisper. They locked eyes, the husband and wife of 9 years. His were an icy blue-gray, hers a soft light brown.
"I used to be so happy, so nice, Jax. Before you met me, and even when we first met. I wasn't always this mean spirited witch I am today. I don't know... I don't know how I've gone so downhill." She took a deep breath and relaxed her shoulders that had been hunched up for so long. Her neck felt so stiff, her lower back aching with a dull pain. The stress these fights brought were not only emotionally draining, but physiologically harmful as well.
"Same goes for you too, Jaxon. You were different back then too. It's almost as if we –"
"Bring out the worst in each other." Jax finished his wife's sad statement in a quiet whisper. Both of their bodies slumped a little.
It was quiet for a long time. The silence allowed them both to search their own thoughts.
"I wish I knew you back then, Teegan." Jaxon finally spoke with regret heavy laden in his voice.
"Ditto."
He cleared his throat and announced, "I'm going out. I'll stay in the guest room." He grabbed his leather jacket from the chair and walked to the doorway. Teegan didn’t make a move. She felt the last thread between them breaking.
"It's… it's over, huh?" she whispered, as Jaxon took his keys off the hook by the door. She glanced up at her husband's weary face. He looked as if he had aged a decade in the last hour.
I do this to him. I bring him down, just like he does to me.
He nodded his head and left.
Teegan sat at their dining room table for what seemed like hours, days; an eternity. Her head was mush, a dull pounding took place in her right temple making it even worse. She felt completely empty and alone.
Suddenly, she was very grateful that Josie was at her mom's for the weekend. The poor little girl had heard her fair share of arguments the last few months. She was glad she was spared this last emotional one.
Teegan felt a bubble of anger forming in her chest. It sprang up until she felt nauseated and she could taste the bile filling her mouth.
This is such bullshit. Nine years wasted. Down the damn drain.
She swallowed hard and picked up a framed picture from the counter. It was one of their engagement pictures, taken so many years ago. Her heart literally felt like it was physically breaking in two as she looked at the picture. They were kissing and the photographer had had Teegan hold a sign off to the side. It read: 'He stole my heart, so I'm stealing his last name.' You could see the smile on Jax's face as he was kissing her, eyes decorated with the slight crow's feet that formed whenever he smiled big. They both looked happy. They look so in love.
Her hand shook hard, and she threw the frame across the room while sobs escaped her mouth. Her chest burned, and her heart raced. Dropping to the floor, she buried her head in her hands.
What went so wrong? Why didn't I stop this? Please let me go back and fix it.
Chapter One
Teegan – March 2014
Something is definitely wrong. Really wrong, I thought the moment I opened my eyes. I looked around, feeling groggy and hung over.
The first thing I noticed was my body felt weird. Weird, as in good, for once. The back pain I’d become accustomed to was missing. My neck wasn't stiff. Everything was more agile, lighter even. I sat up and kept looking around. What I saw nearly made me pass out.
I was alone in my room. At my parents' house.
Posters of my one time favorite boy band decorated the wall. The old dresser that Mom’s dad, my Poppa, had built was lined against one wall and littered with the usual teenage girl paraphernalia. Make-up, nail polish, and girl magazines cluttered the top of the dresser. In the desk chair sat my backpack, the hot pink one I adored my junior year.
My heart was jackhammering in my chest, threatening to burst. What the hell was going on now?
"What the hell is going on?" I whispered the question aloud to make myself feel better. Feeling like an idiot, I put up my hands to my face and felt around. I touched my nose, my cheeks, forehead and ears. My skin was so firm, everything so taunt and thinner. My cheeks weren't puffy like they'd been yesterday.
I climbed out of bed and walked to the closet. Back in the day, there was a mirror hanging on the inside of the door. This would be my first true test. To see if I had completely lost my mind. Time seemed to slow as I took a deep breath and turned the door knob.
“Oh my God.” My seventeen-year-old reflection stared back at me. It was me, but the old me. Me from sixteen years ago. My teenage self that had waist-length, honey colored hair. It hadn't been that length since before Josie was born. In a fit of pregnancy hormone fueled rage, I chopped it all off during the hottest month of the year.
And I was skinny. My hips, they were tiny! My bust was perky, the rounded cleavage showing from the blue camisole I was wearing. There was a stretch of skin between the camisole top and the pajama bottoms I had where I could see that my abs were back. I’d gained them from playing volleyball so many years ago.
I felt dizzy, all sense leaving me. I leaned against the mirror for support. My nose touched the smooth, cold glass and I stared at myself close up. Gone were the wrinkles that had sprouted right after my 30th birthday. My face was thinner, everything more angular. It wasn't the chubbier version that had grown during my pregnancy with Josie and refused to leave after her birth.
I was flawless.
Hot tears rolled down my cheeks. “What's going on?” I asked my reflection.
Again, no answer given.
“Teegan! You're gonna be late! Get your butt in gear!” My mother's voice broke my trance. I stepped away from my reflection and hurriedly picked a pair of denims and a turquoise T-shirt with a big yellow sunflower in the middle of it.
I bent down to grab my favorite pink Converse sne
akers by my bed. A smile formed despite my bewildered feeling. They’d been my favorite shoes in the world. In the middle of college, they had finally given out and I was in such a funk. I hated shopping, especially shoe shopping.
Suddenly, a forgotten memory from our years at the University of Texas came to me.
"Why are you so butt hurt over your shoes?" Jaxon asked, plopping down on my dorm bed.
"Because those were my fave. And I'm not butt hurt. I just hate shoe shopping. It's a major pain in the ass," I’d answered, sitting on my bean bag, mindlessly flipping through a Cosmo magazine.
"Yeah, buying new shoes does suck." Jax replied nonchalantly. I felt him staring and looked up at him.
"What? Quit staring at me stalker!" I picked a sock off the floor and hurled it at him. He caught it and smiled.
"You're so cute. You know that right?"
"Of course I am!" I replied, rolling my eyes. I tilted my head and stuck out my tongue. This caused Jaxon to smile bigger. He held his arms out and pouted his full heart shaped lips.
"Huggie, please?"
I got up from the bean bag and rolled my eyes again, "You know, one day I'm going to video you saying that and show it to all your friends. Bet they'll give you hell for saying Huggie."
I lowered myself onto the bed and put my head on his chest. His arms wrapped around me tight. He nuzzled his nose into my hair and breathed deep. He always told me I smelled like strawberries.
We lay quietly like that for half an hour. I was close to dozing off when he asked, "You want me to buy you another pair of pink ones?" I smiled and nodded and he replied, "Alright baby girl, anything for you."
"Teegan Marie, get down here!" Mom’s angry voice snapped me out of the reverie.
I finished tying my shoes, grabbed my backpack and hauled ass downstairs. I skidded to a halt outside the kitchen. What the heck was I doing? I was going through the motions of a routine I had over a decade ago.
"I'm dreaming. It was all just a dream. I'm in a deep sleep and I'll wake up soon," I whispered to myself. This dream was different though; it was so real, so lifelike, unlike any dream I'd ever experienced before. I straightened my shoulders and walked into the kitchen.
And nearly passed out once more.
My breath caught in my lungs. My parents were sitting at the table eating their breakfast. They looked so much younger than what I was used to.
And this was the first time I had seen my daddy in three years.
He's still alive. My dad is right here in front of me.
Losing my dad had been the hardest thing I’d ever had to endure. It left me heartbroken, depressed and lost. Hot tears welled in my eyes. My chest tightened and I did the first thing my gut told me to do. Even if it was a dream, I wanted to hug him. And so I did.
I wrapped my arms around Daddy and hugged him hard. Tears fell onto his shoulder as I stood there stooped over.
"Teegan, honey, what's wrong?" his voice was laced with concern and fear. He had always been a soft-spoken man, and whenever he did speak, I always felt safe and secure. And loved.
“Dear God, I’ve missed your voice so much.” I whispered. Daddy pulled me away and searched my face.
“Teegan, are you all right? What's the matter?”
I couldn't talk. Words would not form in my brain or come out of my mouth so I just pulled him close and hugged him some more. The faint scent of Old Spice consumed me and I shook my head. When he died, Mom had given me the half empty bottle that he had been using at the time. And it sat on my vanity ever since.
“Teeg, honey. You're starting to worry me. Is everything okay?” Daddy asked. I heard his heartbeat speed up and I took a deep breath.
"Hey Teegan, you have to eat baby. We're all about to leave, okay, honey?" Mom said softly, coming behind my dad so she could look at me. I let go and wiped my eyes. Without a word I took a step and collapsed in my chair.
Both sets of eyes were on me and I gave a timid smile, “I had a horrible dream. It really felt real to me. And I just woke up upset. I'm sorry.” I took a drink of orange juice and prayed my heart would stop beating so fast. I felt jittery and lightheaded.
"Oh well, alright then. Nothing is wrong with more affection. It was just a dream darlin'. Nothing can hurt your old man,” he gave me a broad grin and stood up. “Go ahead and eat what you can. Mom's got to take you to school; your car is still in the shop.” He leaned down and kissed the top of my head. "Love you, kiddo. Have a good day at school."
"Love you too, Daddy," the tightness in my chest returned and I concentrated on breathing. Didn't need a second crying episode in less than 20 minutes.
In the car, Mom talked about her agenda for the day. I sat there quietly, staring out the window. A thousand thoughts streamed through my head so fast, I couldn't grasp them and form a solid idea. I realized the car was silent and my mom was looking at me.
"Huh? What? I'm sorry I wasn't listening." By that time she pulled up in front of a school I did not recognize. "Hey, where are we? What school is this?" I looked at Mom, whose head was tilted and her eyebrows furrowed.
"Teegan, what's wrong? Do you need to miss today and take a break? You seem so out of it."
Everything was too real. Each scene too crisp, too detailed, more so than any dream I had in my life.
I attempted to smile and leaned in to kiss mom's cheek, “No I'm fine, Mama. I'll see you later. I love you.”
The schoolhouse was a tall, four-story brick building. The courtyard out front was beautifully landscaped with lush, dark green St. Augustine grass and strong, tall oak trees. Benches were spread out and students lounged in them, waiting for the bell to ring.
The sign that stood to the left of the double-door entrance read, "Ridgecrest High, Home of the Bears."
I stopped in my tracks. While it didn't seem visually familiar, I knew the name all too well. This was Jax's school in his hometown of Seabrook, Texas. Why the heck was I dreaming of his high school?
I continued walking and entered the school through its double doors. Loud voices, laughter, teachers chiding students to move along, and lockers slamming bombarded me all at once.
I froze in the entryway, and realized that automatically I was going through these motions, but was completely lost in this foreign school. Realizations like that don't occur in dreams and fear swept over me.
Where do I go?
I turned and was about to head out the door when I heard my name.
"Teegan! Over here!" A skinny, pale redhead waved me over.. I took a deep breath and headed toward her. The girl, who I’d refer to as Red until I discovered her name, smiled and adjusted her purple framed glasses as I came closer. She was dressed in a dark green bedazzled tunic and black leggings. She was cute, in a cool nerd sort of way.
"Hey girl, were you about to skip just now?" she asked me in a hushed whisper.
Who are you?
I looked desperately around for a sign of her name while I shook my head, "No, I thought I dropped something outside."
Red smiled and nodded. She turned around and started to walk away. It took two seconds for me to realize that I should follow her, so I did. The hallway clock read 8:10. It smelled like a mixture of perfume and cologne. All the background noise was annoying, people were so loud, a dull thud started at my temples.
"I hope we have a sub again like we did Friday. I really don't feel like seeing Mrs. Golding and getting a bunch of work on a Monday," Red stated. I glanced over to the book she was holding to see if her name was doodled anywhere on the book cover.
"That would be ideal," I concurred. I said a quiet prayer of thanks for finding out at least one teacher's name. Soon, I would find out the subject. Red stopped abruptly and peeked inside room 108. She let out a delighted squeal.
"God loves me! Mrs. G isn't here today. This is going to be a glorious Monday after all!" Red smiled big and went inside the room. Awkwardly, I smiled in response and followed her.
However, I froze right inside the doorw
ay, my heart beating rapidly. Chills ran down my spine and goosebumps prickled my skin.
The boy sitting in the second row, towards the far side of the room caught my attention right away.
Teenage Jaxon.
Chapter Two
Teegan
I grabbed onto Red, my breath trapped in my chest. He sat there talking to another guy, his dark brown-colored hair longer than I've seen it in years. He made a move to sweep it out of his eyes. They crinkled as he laughed and I felt the pit of my stomach grow warm.
"Oh my God, he's so cute." I whispered.
Red turned sharply to me and gave me a quizzical look. "Who, Jax? Girl, since when did your impression change?" Her question knocked me back into reality. I just shrugged, mainly because I had no answer, I had no idea what my previous opinion had been.
I followed Red to his side of the room and my heart thundered. She was going to walk right by him! I tried to stare straight ahead, but I ended up glancing his way. Everything became slow motion, straight out of a movie, as I began to walk past him and at that precise moment he looked up at me and smiled.
"Hey Teegan," he said with a nod of his head and a slight smile, then turned his attention back to his friend.
He was oblivious to the fact that those two simple words nearly made me lightheaded. I took a deep breath, muttered an unintelligible response and kept walking. What was going on?
Red took a seat on the row Jaxon was sitting so I sat beside her in the next row. I had a totally clear view of him.
Dizziness took hold and I put my head down on my desk.
"Tee, what's wrong honey?" I heard Red whisper. I just sat there stunned,
What the hell was going on? That question had become my motto since waking up. I concentrated on my breathing and slowly raised my head. Red was staring at me, wide-eyed, and all I could offer her was a meek smile as I sat upright.
"I'm fine. Just hungry." I explained. Nodding, she brought her book bag up in her lap and went to dig through it and producing a granola bar. She gently tossed it to me and smiled apologetically.
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