Finally

by R. L. Mathewson

  “She did the same thing when Grandma Bea started getting sick. She was terrified of losing her. I used to have to sneak into her room at night and hold her because nothing else worked. She’d cry until even that was too much and then she’d simply lay in my arms trembling. She’s terrified of losing the people that she loves and do you know why?”

  Grinding his jaw, Devin shook his head once, not sure that he wanted to hear this.

  “Do you know what happened to her mother?” Ben asked, tossing the rag in the trash as Devin stood there feeling sick to his stomach.

  “She doesn’t know,” Devin said.

  “She doesn’t remember, which is for the best.” Ben said, sighing heavily as he rubbed the back of his neck.

  “What happened to her mother?” Devin asked.

  “She tried to kill Charlie,” Ben said, shaking his head in disgust as all the air in Devin’s lungs left him in a rush.

  “Holy shit…” T.J. said, looking like he was going to be sick.

  “She doesn’t remember that though. The only thing that she remembers in the generic tale that social services told her, that her mother abandoned her on her grandfather’s front step. What they never told her was what her mother got sick of having to deal with a small child and tried to get rid of her,” Ben said, shrugging it off.

  “What happened to her mother?” Devin found himself asking because he honestly wasn’t sure that he would be able to handle hearing what her mother did to her.

  “No fucking clue and it doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is that Charlie deserves better than to be treated as an afterthought,” Ben said, getting back to the matter at hand.

  “I don’t treat her like an afterthought,” Devin bit out.

  “No? Then what would you call the way that you’re treating her? You didn’t think that she had the right to know that she was never going to have a child of her own? Are you fucking kidding me? This is Charlie we’re talking about here. Do you have any fucking idea what she’s gone through? Do you have any idea what it means to belong to someone? What it would mean to Charlie to have a child? To be a part of someone like that? Because I’m going to tell you right now, that if you had any fucking idea what that would mean to her then you never would have fucked around with her head,” Ben said, shaking his head in disgust.

  “I love her,” Devin said hollowly even as Ben’s words hit and when they did…

  He’d fucked up.

  “She deserves to be happy,” Ben said as Devin’s phone rang.

  Biting back a curse, Devin answered his phone only to shove it back in his pocket less than a minute later and move his ass.

  “What’s wrong?” T.J. yelled after him.

  “Something happened to Dustin at school,” Devin said, rushing into his office and noticed that Charlie still hadn’t come in as he grabbed his keys and ran for the door.

  He was in his truck a minute later and five minutes after that he was throwing his truck in park and racing inside the school. Before the front door had a chance to close behind him, he heard it.

  “I want my mommy!” came the hysterical scream that had him frowning as he made his way to the front desk, because that sounded like Dustin only…

  He’d never heard his son scream like that before.

  “I want my mommy!” came the scream again, drawing his attention to the right only to find Dustin sitting on the floor with his back against the wall, one of his hands over his ears and his eyes squeezed shut tightly as he continued to scream, “I want my mommy!” while Abbi sat next to him, crying as she held onto his other hand.

  “Oh, thank god, you’re here,” Mrs. Haskins said, looking relieved when she spotted him.

  “What happened?” Devin asked, walking around the front desk and headed towards his children.

  “We don’t know. The children were making Mother’s Day gifts and their teacher was trying to do something nice for them. She brought in something special for them to make for you and he got upset,” she explained, wringing her hands together as Dustin continued to scream.

  “I-I want my mommy!” Dustin got out around a sob.

  “That’s because they have a mother,” Devin said, feeling his heart break for his children as he knelt down in front of them.

  When Abbi saw him, she released her brother’s hand and threw herself in Devin’s arms. He wrapped one arm around her as he reached for his son, but Dustin wasn’t having it.

  “I just want my mommy,” Dustin said as his small body trembled. “I have a mommy. Tell them that I have a mommy…please!”

  Swallowing hard, Devin said, “You have a mommy.”

  “I just want my m-mommy,” Dustin said, crying as someone reached past him and-

  “I’m right here,” Charlie said, pulling Dustin into her arms.

  “Mommy,” Dustin mumbled, crying harder as his small arms wrapped around her and held on tight.

  “Shhh, I’m right here,” Charlie said as she carefully stood up with Dustin in her arms. “Everything’s going to be okay,” she promised Dustin as Devin stood up, adjusting Abbi in his arms as he watched Charlie walk away for the second time that day and realized just how badly he’d fucked everything up.

  He also realized that he needed to do something about it.

  Chapter 42

  “I need fluffiness in my life, mommy,” Abbi said, making Charlie’s lips twitch despite the fact that all she wanted to do was curl up into a ball and cry.

  “You have fluffiness in your life,” Charlie said with a pointed look at the small kitten trying to attack her feet beneath the blanket and the bunny currently snuggled in her arms, eating a carrot.

  “I need more,” Abbi said, nodding solemnly as Bradford, whom Charlie would like to point out she’d only jokingly suggested calling Bradford when they got him, jumped onto the couch near Abbi’s feet and curled up, looking appropriately pitiful as he waited for someone to give him another treat.

  “I tell you what,” Charlie said, pausing to kiss Dustin’s cheek as he continued to sleep, “if you can be good and super quiet so that your brother can take a nap, I will seriously consider asking your daddy if we can go to the zoo this weekend.”

  “The zoo with the small petting area or the one where you can walk with the deer?” Abbi asked with a calculating look in her eye that let Charlie know that she was probably already making plans to try to steal a deer, again.

  “The one with the deer enclosure, of course,” Charlie said, somewhat offended that her baby girl would think that she would settle for anything less than the best level of fluffiness.

  Nodding, Abbi said, “That might be acceptable.”

  “And if you are super good and let me get some work done while your brother naps, I might order Blackjack’s pizza for dinner,” she said, unable to help but smile when Abbi said, “I’ll be super good.”

  “Okay, we have a deal then,” Charlie said, pointing to her apartment. “I’m going to leave the door open in case you need anything.”

  “When’s Daddy getting home?” Abbi asked, absently petting her bunny while Charlie forced a smile on her face.

  “Probably after dinner, sweetie. He had to run back to his shop and finish a project,” she said, repeating what Devin told them after he’d dropped them off.

  “Okay,” Abbi said, shifting her attention back to the movie that she was watching as Charlie ran her fingers through Dustin’s hair one last time before she forced herself to walk into her apartment.

  She told herself that she had absolutely no reason to be upset, especially not after today when the kids had called her mommy, which meant more to her than anything in this world. She loved them and that was more than enough, Charlie told herself as she grabbed her camera off her bed and headed to the office and-

  “I’m sorry,” came the unexpected words that drew her attention to find Devin sitting at her desk, waiting for her with a bouquet of white roses in his arms.

  “There’s nothing to apologize
for,” Charlie said, forcing the words out that she hoped would end this conversation as she walked out of her office and headed for the kitchen, deciding that this would be the perfect time to clean her camera.

  “Then why do you look like you’re about to cry?” came the strained question a moment later as she laid her camera on the kitchen island and grabbed her kit out of the bottom cabinet.

  “Just leave it alone, Devin, okay? I’m fine,” Charlie promised him as she tried to remove the lens, but her damn hands wouldn’t stop shaking.

  “I’m not,” he said tightly as he laid the flowers on the kitchen island in front of her.

  Slowly exhaling, Charlie closed her eyes and said, “Please,” because she wasn’t sure that she could handle this right now.

  “Baby, look at me,” Devin said, but she didn’t want to look at him, not right now when she was struggling not to lose it.

  “Look,” she said, licking her lips as she grabbed hold of the kitchen island as she struggled not to cry, “I love you, Devin and I can accept the fact that I am never going to have any children, but I can’t do this right now. I just need some time to accept this, okay?”

  “When I made that promise-” Devin started to explain, but she didn’t want to hear about that damn promise right now.

  “Devin, please don’t,” Charlie said, so close to losing it right now.

  “When I made that promise I never planned on breaking it,” Devin said, ignoring her plea and continued. “I just wanted to be there for my children and to be able to take care of them. I didn’t want to do anything that would make it harder for them. The only problem is that I never expected that I would want to spend the rest of my life with someone and what my promise would mean for you.”

  “You don’t have to explain,” Charlie said, because she already knew why he’d made that promise and as much as she hated it…

  She couldn’t hate him for it.

  “Yes, I do, Charlie. If I had known that you would walk into my life one day and completely fucking destroy it, I would have done so many things differently. I never would have made that promise and I sure as hell never would have wasted the last five years trying to keep it. When I made that promise I didn’t consider what it would mean for you because I never expected to find the love of my life.”

  “Please stop explaining, Devin,” Charlie said, opening her eyes as she pushed away from the kitchen island. “You don’t have to explain anything. I know why you did what you did, and I get it, but I just need time to accept it, okay?” Charlie said, heading for the door.

  “Charlie, wait,” Devin said as she grabbed her bag, deciding that she’d pick up the pizza instead of having it delivered to give herself some time to clear her head.

  “Charlie, please wait,” Devin said as she headed for the door.

  “I’ll be right back,” she said, opening the door and-

  “Charlie, please!” he said, gasping in pain, making her frown as she turned around to find Devin, who was looking really pale, holding onto the kitchen island as he struggled to stand up.

  “What the hell happened?” she said, dropping her bag on the floor and rushed over to help him.

  Shaking his head, Devin continued to gasp in pain as she stood there, struggling not to freak out but it was really difficult to do with him muttering, “Please kill me,” as he dropped to his knees.

  “Okay,” she said, nodding like an idiot because she had no idea what was going on. Licking her lips, she dropped to her knees, looking for something that would explain why Devin was now dropping onto his side with another muttered, “Kill me,” as he curled up into the fetal position.

  “I’m really going to need you to tell me what happened, Devin,” Charlie said, giving up on trying to figure out what was wrong and rushed back over to her bag to grab her phone only to frown when he said, “Four months.”

  “What’s four months, Devin?” she asked, trying to figure out who she was supposed to call.

  There was a gasp of pain and then, he said, “Until I can give you a baby,” making her frown as she glanced back over to find him in the fetal position, cupping himself, and making her frown as she replayed his words in her head and when she did…

  “Oh, my god, Devin! What the hell did you do?” she asked, dropping her phone on her bag and rushed over to the freezer.

  “B-begged my cousin to call in a f-favor,” he said, only to end that with another pained gasp as Charlie grabbed the bucket of ice out of the freezer and quickly made an ice pack for him.

  “I don’t understand,” Charlie said, rushing over to him and moved to place the ice pack on him only to decide that it would probably be better if he did it.

  “Two weeks to heal, four months before I can give you a baby,” Devin managed to get out as he rolled over onto his back and shoved the ice pack down the front of his pants as he slowly exhaled.

  “Better?” Charlie asked, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth.

  “Not even a little bit,” he said, shaking his head as he pressed his hands over his face.

  “You were only gone for four hours, Devin. How did this happen?” Charlie asked, rushing to the bathroom to grab the Advil.

  “Only took two hours to reverse the vasectomy. Pain meds started wearing off a little sooner than I thought they would,” he said when she walked back into the room.

  “Devin, I-”

  “I’m going to give you a baby,” he said firmly as she grabbed a bottle of water off her nightstand before rushing back over to join him on the floor.

  “I don’t understand why you’d do something like this,” Charlie said, dumping a couple of Advil in her hands only to cringe in sympathy when he grabbed the pills out of her hand and shoved them in his mouth, swallowing them dry.

  “Because I love you,” he said, rolling onto his side with a mumbled, “That’s better,” only to roll back onto his back a few seconds later with, “No it’s not.”

  “And I love you, Devin, but you didn’t need to do this,” she said, hating to see him in this much pain.

  “We’re going to get married and have another child,” Devin said firmly as he took her hand in his.

  “Devin, I-”

  “We’re also going to make it official. I emailed my cousin Garrett and he’s drawing up the adoption papers,” he said, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze.

  “Really?” Charlie said, feeling her lips pull up into a watery smile.

  “Really,” Devin said, using his hold on her hand, he pulled her closer so that he could reach up and cup her face in his hands.

  “Are you sure?” she asked, placing her hand over his as she searched his expression, trying to make sure that this was what he really wanted.

  “Absolutely,” Devin said, pulling her closer so that he could kiss her, slowly brushing his lips against hers.

  “How many?” she asked, making him chuckle.

  “I think we could handle two more, maybe three,” he said, making her smile.

  “Yeah?” she said, absently as she slowly lost herself in that kiss.

  “Mmmhmm,” Devin said, running his hands down her back. “Just as long as you’re finally mine.”

  Chapter 43

  Two Weeks and Five Days Later…

  That was it.

  He wanted a divorce, Devin decided as he sat there, seething as he was forced to watch his wife cuddling his children and pets while he was stuck on the other end of the couch, alone. As he sat there, absently running his thumb over the underside of the black wedding band that he now proudly wore on his finger, one thing became painfully clear.

  His wife was trying to kill him.

  For the past nineteen days, she’d kept her naughty little hands off him and it was fucking killing him. At first, he’d appreciated it and even foolishly believed that she was doing it because she loved him, but then the doctor cleared him to return to regular activities and…

  Nothing.

  Not one fucking kiss, caress, or touc
h to put him out of his fucking misery. The most he got was a kiss on his cheek and a quick hug seconds before he was forced to watch her give his children double the kisses that he got. Then again, that probably shouldn’t surprise him given what happened on their wedding night…

  Since he’d been somewhat incapacitated at the time, he’d been forced to ask for help to pull it off. He’d considered waiting until he was healed before they got married, but he didn’t want to take any chances that she’d change her mind. So, he did what every self-respecting Bradford had done before him.

  He’d kidnapped his bride.

  Okay, so kidnapping might be a bit of an exaggeration since what he really did was tell her that they were taking the kids to the movies with Ben and T.J.’s help and then simply drove to New Hampshire while pretending that he didn’t hear her mumbling something about a secondary location. Once they were in New Hampshire, he’d shamelessly used the twins to lure her out of the car and into the courthouse and once he had her where he wanted her…

  She’d told him that she wasn’t sure that she could marry him because she just wasn’t feeling worshipped enough to find the energy to make it down the aisle.

  That was followed by him agreeing that she should feel properly worshipped on her wedding day before locking her in a storage closet until she agreed to marry him. That led to him leaving her in there until she admitted that she loved and adored him and couldn’t wait to marry him. Once she’d convinced him that she couldn’t wait to marry him, he’d released her so that he could make her the happiest woman alive.

  He’d ignored her glares while the Justice of the Peace married them and focused on the night ahead. The doctor hadn’t cleared him, but he’d decided not to let that stop him. He’d planned on spending the night showing his wife just how much he loved her only to discover that his wife had made other plans, plans that ended with him sleeping alone while his wife and children cuddled on the other hotel bed, watching Disney movies all night while he’d laid there, seething.