“Sure. But I have to warn you, I haven’t played in a while. Not to mention, I don’t know a lot of your songs,” I admit.
“You’re talented, Grant. You’ll catch the beat fast. Just get here as quickly as you can. We’re supposed to be on in ten.” He hangs up the phone but not before I hear some screaming in the background.
By the time I arrive at the bar, Sadie is massaging Brady’s shoulders on stage, while Trey and Dex sit next to them, patiently waiting for me. I don’t see Jessa anywhere. I can’t help but wonder how she’s taking the news, whether she’s at home crying or worse, following him on tour. Making my way over to the stage, I sidestep through the crowd who gives me a once-over, clearly confused by my presence.
“Awesome! Thanks, man.” Trey pushes off the stage and holds his hand out.
“You’re welcome. I just hope I play alright,” I say, shaking his hand. Trey and I couldn’t be more opposite. His tattooed and pierced body with a black tank top and baggy jeans is completely different than my usual khakis and polo. Tonight I wore jeans and a t-shirt to attempt to look less preppy. Regardless, Trey has always been welcoming and friendly to me.
“Oh, you’ll do just fine. Brady has nothing but good things to say about your playing,” he says, and I quirk my lip up and look over at Brady, who laughs. He would brag about my skills because he was my teacher, along with his dad.
“Believe me, he can play,” Brady clasps my shoulder, leading us up on stage.
“I don’t know, Brady. I’m rusty as hell,” I confess.
“You’ll be fine. I wrote most of the songs so you know them already. I’ll give you the heads up on chords,” he says, hooking up my guitar to the amplifier. I guess I don’t have a choice now. “And Grant?” I look up from tuning my strings. “Thank you. What’s that, a million paybacks I owe you?” he asks, his voice full of gratitude.
“You don’t owe me anything. Glad I could help,” I say and smile at him, he grins back. If someone would’ve told me six months ago that I’d share a stage with Brady Carsen, I would’ve laughed them out of the room. But I’m thankful to have him back in my life. It actually makes me feel like I have family again, since he’s always been like a brother to me.
Brady takes the microphone from the stand and winks down at Sadie, who remains in the round booth to the right. She’s alone, and I wonder if Jessa is usually by her side during The Invisibles’ gigs. Sadie smiles brightly up at Brady and then turns to me, giving me a thumbs up. Brady turns my way with a reassuring smirk, and then I hear Trey hit his drumsticks together to establish the beat behind me and my stomach drops.
I follow Dex’s chords until I find the correct mixtures. Brady backs up from the stage and whispers specific instructions to me. Before I realize it, I’ve found the groove. I know I’m not as good as Rob, but I’m pulling it off as best I can. After two songs, I remember how much I love playing music. How you can lose yourself and empty your mind from all the shit that consumes it on a daily basis?
The smile on my face probably looks cheesy as hell, but I haven’t enjoyed myself this much in a long time. Sweat pours off me and my grey t-shirt now appears black, but I can’t stop moving and jumping with the music. A twinge of disappointment hits me when Brady tells everyone it’s the last song.
I glance up from my guitar at the dark crowd below us and see her blonde head among all of the people. When she lands next to Sadie in the booth, Sadie immediately reaches over and hugs Jessa. I can’t tell if she’s been crying from up here, but I do notice the look of surprise when Sadie points to me up on the stage. Nodding my head her way, I quickly put my eyes back on the guitar, now eager to finish this last song and get down to her.
After the guys and I put away the equipment in Dex’s truck, they all change their shirts and I realize in my rush that I forgot one. I walk back inside the bar, astonished to find that Jessa already ordered a beer for me.
“Thanks,” I say, scooting in next to her.
“You’re sweaty,” she says, plucking at my shirt that’s currently stuck to my body. I’m surprised to see no trace of puffy or red eyes.
“I forgot a shirt to change into,” I apologize and scoot away.
“No need to do that, I’m used to it,” she jokes.
All the guys come over and everyone partakes in beers and shots, except for Brady, who has his usual water, and Sadie, who has a vodka tonic.
“Sorry, Jessa,” Dex says with clear sympathy.
“Well, it is what it is.” She seems completely casual about it, and I’m pissed that they’re going to try the long-distance thing. As though Rob would keep his hands to himself during three months of concerts and girls hanging all over him.
“He’s a fucking asshole,” Trey exclaims. “How could he leave us like that? A couple hours before the show and he says ‘see ya… ya’…asshole.” I don’t know Trey very well, but the anger coming from him seems foreign to his usual relaxed demeanor.
“It was a shitty thing to do,” Brady agrees and shrugs his shoulders.
“Shitty? It’s an asshole move. Please, tell me you are kicking him out,” Trey says, continuing his anti-Rob rant.
“I’m not going to leave him homeless,” Brady says.
“You should. What a fucking asshole.” Trey tips his head back, consuming his shot before leaving the table. My eyes follow him to a redhead at the bar giving him fuck-me eyes. He swoops her up and carries her into the dark hallway of the bar. I wish I had his balls. He takes what he wants and gives a shit about consequences.
“I guess we know where Trey stands on the issue,” Sadie jokes.
“Hey, let’s get out of here. I want to go over and see Jacks at the diner,” Brady says and stands up to help Sadie out. “Do you guys want to come?”
“No thanks, man. I see a brunette over there I wouldn’t mind having under me tonight. You guys have fun.” Dex walks away with a wave.
“What about you two?” Brady asks me and Jessa.
“I have to get out of this shirt first,” I say. “I’ll meet you there.” I scoot out of the round booth and to my surprise, Jessa follows.
“I’ll go with Grant. We’ll meet you there,” she tells them, and Sadie gives her a knowing smile.
“Sounds good.” Brady leads Sadie out of Aces and to the car, and I place my hand on the small of Jessa’s back, letting her go first.
We head out to the street and get in my beat-up truck. I’m embarrassed to have her in such a piece of shit, but what choice do I have?
“Sorry for the car,” I apologize, but she shrugs her shoulders like it doesn’t matter.
“If it has a radio and gets you where you need to go, that’s all that matters, right?” she says and starts fiddling with the radio.
“Are you really okay with him leaving?” I ask, not for myself but for her.
“I guess. I didn’t really have a choice. It’s not like he asked me or anything,” she reveals. “Not that I would have kept him from the opportunity.” She turns up the volume, signaling to me that she doesn’t want to talk about it. The rest of the car ride is quiet except for the radio.
I cringe when we get to my fraternity house. It’s obvious that an impromptu party has formed, probably because the bars are starting to close for the night. Cars line the streets and people are milling around the front. Jessa shifts uncomfortably in her seat when she notices it.
“Let’s go,” I tell her, getting out of the car. I grab her hand, weaving her through the groups of people. Numerous ‘Grant’, ‘What’s up, Grant?’ get called our way, but I just give a wave, not stopping to talk. When we finally arrive at my door, I ask her if she wants to come in, but she says she’ll wait outside.
“Okay, it won’t take long,” I say, walking into my room. I pull a t-shirt out of the drawer and then scramble into the bathroom to put more deodorant on before dressing in the cleanly laundered shirt. While I’m in there, I decide to quickly brush my teeth and run water through my hair before throwing a bal
l cap on backwards.
I’m about to open my bedroom door when I hear a prissy voice say, “You’re waiting on Grant?”
“Yes,” Jessa says, sounding unconcerned.
“Why would he bring you here?” she continues, and I know I should open the door and reveal myself, but I’m curious how Jessa will handle it.
“Maybe because I suck his dick.” Jessa’s voice is devoid of emotion, and I have to hold in my laughter.
“I’m sorry, what did you say?” the girl’s voice asks. There’s only one reason someone asks to have something repeated during a confrontation, when they can’t think of a comeback.
“I know, sometimes all that hairspray just fogs the brain, right?” Jessa sarcastically responds. “Come a little closer then.” There’s a pause and I assume she’s waiting for the girl to walk toward her. “I said, ‘I suck his dick’,” Jessa repeats herself.
“You’re disgusting.” I hear the clicking of heels across the old wooden floors of the hallway.
“Oh yeah, one more thing princess,” Jessa starts talking again. “I swallow too,” she calls out to her.
I don’t hear the girl respond so I open the door. Jessa looks at me and I can’t hide my humored expression. She knows immediately that I overheard her.
“Don’t get any ideas, Bishop. I just had to get my point across,” she jokes.
“Aw man. Here I was going to pull you into my room and make you prove it. Just like every other girl, you’re just a tease. Saying you like to suck dick, when in reality you say that to get us to go down on you,” I tease her.
She leans toward me, so close that our lips are only millimeters apart and whispers, “Believe me, Grant, I’m far from a tease.” She turns around and walks down the hallway.
I casually adjust myself and stare at her sweet ass, while I follow her down the hall.
We get out of the house without any more confrontations. Not that there weren’t looks and appraisals from many of my ‘friends’, but at least no one opened their mouth. If they had, I’m not sure I would have had much self-control.
By the time we make it to the diner, Jacks is sitting down in a booth with Sadie and Brady. Jessa leads the way to them and I notice an older gentleman at the counter, eating a slice of pie and drinking coffee. I disregard him at first, but then I notice the dagger tattoo on his forearm and I abruptly stop. Standing in the middle of the diner, I glare at the back of his head. It’s him.
“You coming, man?” Brady calls out from the booth.
My feet feel like they are trapped in quicksand. All those feelings from five years ago wash over me and I sink further into the ground. I hear them calling my name, but I can’t move. Then the jackass turns around and stares at me. I’m sure I look different, older and bigger, but I see the recognition cross his face. He knows exactly who I am.
Pulling out his wallet, he leaves a few bills on the counter before walking around me and out the door. I don’t turn around to make sure he leaves, but I don’t walk over to the table either. I just stand there staring at the seat he was occupying. The man whose actions changed the course of my life.
“Grant,” Jessa’s soft voice says. When I look down, I see her hand on my forearm.
“Sorry.” I shake my head back and forth, trying to come back to reality.
“Did you know him?” she asks, her voice still tentative.
“No, I didn’t know him,” I say. It’s the truth. I didn’t know him before it happened, and I really only know one thing about him. He’s a selfish bastard.
“Come on. I’m sure you’re hungry after playing.” She puts her arm through mine and leads me to the table.
I don’t miss Brady’s look. I never knew if he heard the rumors around school, but based on the expression on his face, I’m guessing he did.
“You did an awesome job tonight, man,” Brady says, playfully hitting my shoulder. “I have a proposition for you,” he says.
“What’s that?” I ask, acting as though I am perusing the menu.
“Play with us for the rest of the year. We aren’t going to continue The Invisibles after graduation anyway.” Brady leans back in the booth, extending his arm around Sadie and she cuddles up into his side. They are the most annoyingly affectionate couple I know.
“I don’t know. I have so much on my plate,” I admit.
“You get Rob’s share. It’s not a ton of money, but it will probably bring in more than what Barbells pays you.” He nudges me a little more.
“I can’t leave Chuck. He’s invested too much in me,” I say, although, I have to admit it’s tempting.
“You were really good tonight. Did you enjoy yourself?” Jessa asks me.
“I did,” I confirm and close the menu in order to give this conversation my undivided attention.
“It seemed like it,” she says.
“Yeah, you looked hot up there,” Sadie chimes in, and I give her a doubtful look.
“Let’s not get carried away, baby,” Brady tells her, pulling her closer.
“No worries, I only have eyes for one Invisible.” She giggles and kisses his cheek.
“Technically, I’m not an Invisible,” I add.
“It’s up to you, Grant. You’re the best I know, and you already know most of the songs. I know that with a couple practices, you’ll be up to speed. Hell, you helped me write some of the parts,” Brady continues, trying to influence me.
“You should really consider it. I wish I would’ve taken pictures of you up there. It’s the happiest I’ve ever seen you,” Jessa says.
“You’ve only known me a couple months, Jessa.” I lean back, straightening my arms out and pushing against the back of the booth.
“She’s right, Grant, and I’ve known you a little longer,” Sadie adds.
“I’ve known you the longest, and even though we’ve had our differences, I haven’t seen that smile for years,” Brady says. “Come on, man. Just like old times.” He extends his hand out for me to shake on it.
I contemplate the decision. It’ll be tough to add another activity, but they’re right, I had way too much fun out there not to do it. “Alright, I’m in,” I agree and shake Brady’s hand.
“We’re going to have so much fun, man, just wait.” Brady’s ecstatic and it rubs off on me.
Jackie aka “Jacks” comes over to the table and takes our order. Brady orders for both him and Sadie. I order my cheeseburger and fries with a Coke. When it comes around to Jessa, she says, “I’ll have a chocolate sundae with whip cream and extra nuts.” We all bust out laughing.
“What? I like my desserts. I might steal a couple fries though,” she says and chuckles, looking my way. All I can think is that I’m happy to give her more than my fries.
We finish our meals and Brady asks me to come by tomorrow to practice. Since I don’t have to work at Barbells until Monday, I accept. The anxiousness flowing through me at the prospect of playing again both surprises and pleases me at the same time.
Brady and I split the bill and all four of us walk outside. “Do you want me to drive you home?” I whisper to Jessa.
“I would hate for you to go out of your way. I might as well go with them, since we’re going to the same place,” she says, pointing to Sadie and Brady ahead of us.
“Right.” I shove my hands in my pockets and follow them.
“Thanks for the meal. Sorry that I stole more than a couple fries,” she laughs. A couple is an understatement. First she poured vinegar all over them and then doused them with salt. On top of that, she polished off the rest of them. I could care less, but it scares me how natural it felt to put my plate between us and share with her.
“No problem.” I shrug my shoulders, trying to appear indifferent.
“Well, I guess I should get going,” she says as she slowly starts walking backward toward Brady’s car.
“See you, Jessa,” I say.
“Bye, Grant.” She grins at me and turns around to climb into the backseat of Brady’s Camar
o.
I get into my truck and drive back to the fraternity house. For the first time in the last hour, I allow myself to think about Lizzy. She and Jessa couldn’t be more different. I wonder if that dagger-tattooed man wouldn’t have ruined us, what our future would have been or if we would have had one at all.
Jessa
I want nothing more than to be in that truck with Grant as I watch him pull out of the parking lot. If I would have had to guess which car was his, it definitely wouldn’t have been the beat-up truck. It doesn’t fit him at all. I saw the embarrassment in his eyes when he opened the door for me to get in. Although the inside is clean and kept up, the outside needs some serious cosmetic work. The funny thing is, seeing he isn’t completely perfect only makes me want him more.
As I watch Brady extend his hand over the center console and place it in Sadie’s, a pang of jealousy hits me. I so desperately want that. If I’m being honest, my relationship with Rob was just a distraction from what I really crave. He wasn’t the best for me, and that’s why it’s probably better he never met my dad. I imagine my dad might have kicked him out of the house.
And although I have no proof, I sometimes wonder if he strayed. The fact that I never truly cared to find out should’ve told me something. Bottom line though is that Rob isn’t what I want for my future; he was just a stepping stone on my road to reinvention.
We pull up to the house and I’m back to wishing Grant was dropping me off. I think about the possibility that he would’ve kissed me. But then his words ring in my head, and I know I have to be done with Rob before I go to him.
All three of us walk in the back door just as some blonde is leaving. She doesn’t seem happy, and I only need one guess as to where she came from.
“Hey, date over so soon?” I kid Trey, who’s sitting at the table eating a sandwich and drinking a beer.
“They’re not dates, Jdoll,” he smiles up to me.
“Do you think you’ll ever just pick one?” Sadie asks, grabbing a water bottle and taking a seat at the table.
Let Me In (The Invisibles #2) Page 6
