by Addison Fox
“I told you I was fine. It’s my mistake and I’ll clean it up. The last thing you needed was me making a clumsy mess tonight. This place is hopping.”
“It’s no big deal. We break glasses all the time.”
“It was stupid.”
“Really, Roman. It’s no problem.”
“Damn it, Avery! I’ll take care of it. First the damn knee the other day and now this. Quit coddling me.”
“I’m not—” She broke off, and he didn’t need the full range of his vision to see she was hurt.
He gentled his voice. “Just give me a minute. That’s all.”
• • •
She’d given him more than a few minutes after the incident with the glasses. In fact, Avery had steered clear all night, talking to him only when she needed to give him an order or ask for his help to snag something from the supply closet.
The last of their patrons had left fifteen minutes before and the large lobby was eerily silent, broken only by the sound of clinking glasses. Roman turned away from busing his last table to see Avery wiping down the bar.
“I’m sorry about before.”
She shrugged, her strokes over the bar long and even. “It’s nothing.”
He set his last tray of glasses on the still dirty end before coming around the backside to finish cleaning them up. “I was embarrassed and you were only trying to be nice.”
His gaze alighted on the empty bottle they’d shared earlier. Avery had rinsed it and stowed it on a small shelf near the bar. It touched him—the idea that she would hang on to it—and the urge to tell her about his vision hit him so hard the words were nearly out of his mouth before he pulled them back.
His coach didn’t even know the depth of the problem.
He had to keep this one to himself.
“Busy night.”
“Your mom does a good business.”
“You certainly seem to have something to do with that.” Roman flipped open the door to the dishwasher and started loading what was left of the glasses.
“I enjoy it. The whole trip to Ireland wasn’t about just going somewhere. I like hospitality. Seeing people enjoy themselves and knowing I had a hand in that.”
“You’re good at it and you always have been. People raved about the prom the year you were the committee chair. And you did single-handedly coordinate travel for all of Sloan and Walker’s guests.”
“People like when things run smoothly. I’ve had a lot of years to practice thinking several steps ahead.”
Roman put the last glass in and closed the door of the dishwasher and turned toward her. He knew she spoke of her mother and, just like his bad eye, he wanted to talk to her about it.
Wanted to understand what she went through.
“I made a mess of it the other morning, but I am sorry for your mom’s passing. And all that came before it.”
He waited for her angry reaction and was pleased when a smile softened her face instead. “Thank you.”
“I’m also sorry for the inappropriate things I said to you last night. After.” The words felt stale on his tongue but he kept going, unwilling to shortchange her from the apology she deserved. “You’re a beautiful, amazing woman and I want you to have a full and happy life. I had no right to ask you about the intimate details of it.”
Roman’s words echoed in her ear and she was touched. Although she didn’t want to repeat herself, she had no other answer than “Thank you.”
He picked up another rag and finished wiping off his end. “Do you want to talk about it? Your mom, I mean.”
“There’s not a whole lot to say. You know her background. What she was like.”
“She loved you.”
Avery thought about the long years of living with Alicia Marks. A woman who could smile with the quickest of ease, yet who never managed to get rid of the disappointment that lay banked behind her eyes.
“That’s probably the only thing that made it bearable.”
“I think it’s hard. When our loved ones can’t be who we need them to be.”
“Who’s wrong in that case? Us or them?”
He walked around the bar and took one of the high barstools, a fresh glass of club soda in hand. “I think it’s less about right or wrong and more a matter of acceptance.”
Avery glanced down at the rag in her hand and the top of the familiar, scarred wooden bar. She’d cleaned it so many times over the years she knew every seam and divot. She looked up and caught his gaze, unwilling to say what she needed to facing the bar.
“That was the hardest part.”
“Watching her unable to change?”
“No.” Avery swallowed hard. “Not being able to get over you. All I could think was that I was repeating her mistakes. Making the same choices, unwilling to move on after the grief of losing a relationship.”
“It’s not the same.”
She shook her head. “No, it’s actually quite similar.”
“No, Ave, it’s not. I didn’t leave you pregnant and alone. And I certainly kept up with you. Your father was never a part of your life and he wasn’t a partner to your mother. They didn’t have what we had.”
“It doesn’t change the fact that you’ve been gone a long time.”
She saw the frustration cross his face in harsh lines and tried to defuse the situation.
“It’s not meant as an insult, Roman. I know what we had was a powerful thing, especially at the age we had it. But it doesn’t change the fact that it has haunted me.”
“It’s haunted me, too.”
Her gaze was drawn to his large hands where they were splayed on the countertop, and she marveled at how the tips of his fingers pressed into the wood. “You got the adventure.”
“I know I did. It doesn’t change the fact that I missed you terribly.” His fingers moved into a light tap on the bar and she guessed he didn’t even realize he made the gesture. “It took me over a year to be with anyone.”
A sharp spear of pain lit up her abdomen at his words. “What?”
“Years ago. When I went to New York. It was over a year before I slept with anyone.”
“Oh.”
Although the image of him sleeping with anyone was uncomfortable, the knowledge that he didn’t simply leap into bed with the first available rink bunny was touching.
“I meant what I said yesterday. I’m not a man-whore athlete. And I haven’t been with that many women. Haven’t wanted to be, either. But that first relationship was tough.”
“We grew up and went in different directions.”
“We did. And even though we did, I just thought you should know that.”
“Thank you.”
“Hat trick.” He glanced up from his drink and there was a smile in his eyes. “That’s the third time you said ‘thank you.’”
She smiled in return at the sweet little memory his words evoked. They’d teased each other as kids whenever one of them said something three times. “So it is.”
“So speaking of adventures. How was Ireland?”
The image of misty mornings and rolling green hills immediately filled her mind’s eye and she returned his smile with a broad one of her own.
“Take whatever magnificent image you have in mind about Ireland and fine-tune it. Do you have it?” When he nodded, she added, “Now understand you’re still only about halfway to right. It’s a glorious place.”
“You loved it.”
“I did.”
“And the woman who changed places with you?”
“Lena.”
Roman nodded. “I didn’t think my mom would be as open to her as she was, but she couldn’t stop singing her praises. I know she hopes Lena will come back for a visit.”
“She and her brother are fantastic. Her brother owns the hotel I went to.”
“Is that Declan? He of the sexy voice every woman in Indigo’s been talking about?”
She shot him a dark look as she tossed the wet rag into the small hamper they kept i
n a corner of the bar. “Do you really want to go there again, Caveman?”
“Not really.”
“Then suffice it to say Declan O’Mara has many wonderful qualities. But King of my Heart isn’t one of them.”
“Poor bastard.”
Avery came around the bar, unwilling to mar the lovely glow hovering between them. Rather than risk their conversation turning sour, she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek instead before leaving for the night.
“Damn straight.”
If she felt the heat of his cheek on her lips long after she’d returned to her room, she decided it was a fair exchange for the joy to be found in a quiet conversation with one of her oldest friends.
Chapter Twelve
“Are you really going to get your asses kicked by a girl?” Avery hollered over her shoulder, one of her most favorite insults. She usually saved it for mile four of their run, but the team was dragging and she pulled it out after their third lap around town.
“We’re keeping up, Miz Avery!” one of the boys hollered as he extended his legs to pass by her.
Tasty waved at them from his shop as they all passed, and she saw him shake his head as the boys tumbled past her like a pack of oversized puppies.
“You’re quite the slave driver.” Roman whispered it as he paced alongside her.
“They love it.”
“They also love your very fine ass and runway legs. Which is no doubt the reason why they run behind you.”
She turned to him, her mouth hanging open. “That’s not true.”
“It’s completely true. I heard Mike whisper it to Scott.”
“That dog.”
“Oh, cut the kid a break. He’s as smitten with you as his older brother.”
“You know about that?”
“Everyone knows about it. Half of Alaska knows about it. They talk about it in the bars down in Anchorage. Just how smitten Ronnie the bartender is for Avery the hot hotel proprietor.”
“You’re a jerk.” She pushed him, satisfied when the shove was enough to break up his steady, even pace.
He shrugged and lifted his hands out to the side. “I’m honest.”
“Besides, how would you know the gossip in town?”
“Ronnie’s been in love with you since he was a kid.”
Avery recalled a conversation she’d had the previous winter with Grier and Jess. “Yeah, well, he won’t make a move because of you.”
“What do I have to do with it?”
“You tell me. The way I hear it, you’ve put the fear of God in him.”
“I did no such thing.”
Avery caught the way he averted his eyes when he said that last bit and she pushed harder. “What did you say to him?”
“Nothing. I haven’t even seen the guy since I’ve been home.”
“Roman Andrew Forsyth. At any time in the past, have you said or implied anything to Ronnie?”
Roman kept his gaze straight ahead as they moved into the fourth mile of their run. “I might have suggested to him on a visit home a few years ago that he seemed awfully fond of his hands.”
“And?”
“And nothing. He works with his hands, making all those drinks, flipping beer caps off, that sort of thing.”
“What the hell have you been learning in New York? You’re like Tony Soprano or something!”
He shrugged but still wouldn’t meet her eyes. “It was nothing.”
“It wasn’t your place.”
“Look, I saved you a hassle.”
“How so?”
He did turn at this, his height advantage causing her to have to look up to meet his gaze. “If he really wanted you, a few comments from me shouldn’t have deterred him.”
Then Roman ran off, hollering at the boys to speed it up as they raced toward the finish at the entrance to town.
As she followed behind, Avery couldn’t completely fault him for his logic.
• • •
Roman shouted out orders like a drill sergeant. Most of the boys were in pairs around the gym at the Indigo Blue and he sent the last few off to their positions.
“Charlie. Greg. Get over there and spot Steven.” Roman pointed to the free weights. “Mike and Stink, go take the rowing machines.”
Avery shook her head as she put her hands on her hips. “Stink really needs a new nickname.”
“Have you smelled the kid?” Roman whispered as everyone took their places.
“I thought you were immune to hockey funk?”
Roman eyed her after he was satisfied each of the boys was doing his reps properly. “There’s funk and then there’s funk. He’s got the latter.”
“I’ll talk to his mother. I think he just needs some new gear. The grandmothers make an annual donation to the team scholarship fund. Maybe we can get him fixed up with some new stuff.”
Roman filed away the news of his grandmother’s generosity—not a surprise, but something he’d like to remember to thank her for all the same—and focused back on the boys.
“They’ve got a lot of talent.”
“They do. What they need is a coach who’ll stay put for the long haul.”
Roman had been thinking that very thing. “I do know a guy. I have no idea if he’d even consider taking the job, but he is worth talking to.”
“Who is it?”
“A guy I played with early in my career. He got out after an injury. Moved down to the minors for a few years and then has bummed around from coaching job to coaching job. He’s good, just a little restless, and the minors aren’t always the most dependable. Teams get relocated or local towns lose interest after the novelty wears off.”
“Restless is going to be a hard sell. The town wants someone to come and make a commitment.”
“He’ll at least commit to an entire season, unlike the last guy. Besides, that’s a bit of a shortsighted expectation, don’t you think? I mean, this is a hard life here. A good life, but a hard one. No one knows how they’ll handle it until they actually live here.”
Roman knew he didn’t have a full right to criticize every little thing happening in Indigo, but he did have a right to an opinion.
“Fair point. It’s not for everyone.” She cracked a broad smile. “I still say Sloan and Grier are in for a big surprise when the glow of sex wears off and they realize they’re smack in the middle of nowhere.”
“You don’t think they can handle it?”
She grew more serious, the question obviously one she’d thought of herself as well. “No, it’s not a matter of handling it or not. But I do think they’re going to have an adjustment all the same.”
“They probably will. I had one in reverse going to New York.”
“Really?”
“Hell, yeah. Here I was, in the middle of one of the largest cities in the world. I was a nobody on the team, getting my butt kicked on an hourly basis, and I was scared sh—spitless.” He caught himself just in time and censored his language in the event the boys were paying more attention than he gave them credit for. “And I missed my home.”
“Well, it figures.” She moved up into his personal space.
“What does?”
Her skin was still flushed from the run through town and her cheeks had a pink vitality to them that tugged at his insides. She was so close he could see the dark ring of blue that rimmed the edge of her dark irises.
“Maybe if you were getting laid you’d have enjoyed yourself a bit more.”
And maybe he should have faced the kids alone today, he realized with a start.
Spending the morning with a teasing, sweaty, happy-go-lucky Avery was wreaking havoc with his libido. Add to it the embarrassment of potentially being caught—the thin workout shorts he wore would do nothing to hide a raging hard-on—and he cursed himself a million times the fool.
Before he could curse himself any further, a shout from the corner pulled him from the moment and he headed for the fight brewing in front of the weight rack. Stink was surrounde
d by two boys and it didn’t take much to figure out who was the instigator.
Roman had had his eye on the two kids on the team with the weakest skills. Both had been overly aggressive with the hitting while on drills the day before, and he had a suspicion that if there were holes in the team’s camaraderie, it came from them.
The two of them had Stink against the rack of weights and a clearly menacing aura had descended over the interaction.
“Problem, gentlemen?”
“Stink over here is bothering the rest of us.”
Roman glanced quickly at the boy but didn’t react to the statement. A misplaced word and the kid would have it even harder. “How so, Will? I put him on the rowing machine to work his cardio for a bit. I haven’t called for a rotation yet.”
“He stinks, Coach.” Will’s partner, Zach, wasn’t quite as hot under the collar.
Working to keep it light, Roman offered up what he thought of as his Hollywood smile. “For the record, you all stink. It’s called a workout for a reason.”
The room had quieted and he got a good round of guffaws at that one.
“Not like this.”
So Zach was the mouthpiece. Dropping his hands to his hips, Roman took a few steps forward, leveraging all of the menace six foot four inches could provide. “If you’re not enjoying yourselves, then maybe you should leave practice early.”
“But it’s him, Coach.” Will added a shoulder shove at Stink for good measure.
The move was enough to pull a clearly agitated Stink into the fight and bedlam broke out immediately. The force of Stink’s movements and Zach’s block had them tumbling away from the rack of weights, into Roman.
He stumbled backward, his footing off as he jammed his leg against one of the machines. He lost his balance, his own arms waving to right himself when he heard Avery’s soft cry as he fell into her.
A few of the other boys ran up, pulling Will and Stink away from each other, but in the midst of the melee, Roman wasn’t able to move off Avery all that quickly.
“Avery. Are you all right?”
“Damn it, but you’re heavy.”
“Well, yeah. I didn’t even know you were behind me.” He dragged himself off her, rolling back over to grab her hand to pull her to a sitting position. As he did, he immediately caught sight of the red splotch next to her eye.
