Ron was beginning to lose his cool. “No!” he said. “That's not—I'm not—Emmy give me that!”
Emmy didn't want to give up the box. “No!” she said. “It's mine! Mine and Jodie's and Marcy's.”
“How can that be?” Hanna asked. “Is it a ring or not?”
Ron finally got the box away from Emmy who immediately began to scream at him. “Give that back! It's my earring!”
“Earring?” Kara asked. She felt totally confused and despite her burst of apprehension at the thought of an engagement ring, completely crestfallen.
“I'm sorry,” Ron said to her. Emmy was still angrily trying to get the little box back from him. “I didn't intend to give this to you—damn!"
Ron looked down to find his niece biting him viciously on the leg.
“Jesus, Emmy! What the hell are you doing?”
“Emmy!” her mother snapped. “No biting!”
Emmy burst into tears. “But I want my earring!”
Ron was looking increasingly flustered. His fair skin flushed a dark red and his normally cool demeanor looked ready to burst into a tantrum of his own as he tried to keep his niece from biting him again. Emmy's parents didn't move from their seats. They weren't even forcefully telling Emmy to stop.
Kara decided to intervene before things got even worse. She sat down on the floor beside Emmy and pulled the little girl into her lap. Emmy resisted, of course, but Kara was a lot stronger. “Would you like a new pair of earrings?” Kara asked her. “Ron and I got you those pretty princess dolls, but your birthday is coming up in January. Would you like us to get you a nice pair of earrings then?”
“I want them now!” Emmy shouted.
Fortunately, Kara had a grip on the little girl's forearms from when she pulled the child into her lap or Emmy might have hit her.
Ron seemed to pull himself together, because he sat down beside Kara and tried to help. “I'm sorry, Emmy, but I didn't get you earrings for Christmas. I got these for Kara.”
“But there are three rings!” Emmy protested. “Kara only has two ears!”
“Three?” Kara asked, surprised by the number.
“Uh-huh,” Emmy agreed. She emphasized her point by vigorously nodding her head. “One for Jodie, one for Marcy, and one for me!"
“Three?” Hanna asked.
Kitten suddenly laughed. It was a nasty sound—proving that on some level she was enjoying this situation. “Oh, Ron,” she said. “You are a bad boy, aren't you? And Kara, I'm impressed. I didn't think you had this in you.”
Kara had absolutely no idea what she was talking about, but Ron clearly did. The flush in his face grew significantly darker.
Suddenly Kitten's daughter, Marcie, laughed as well. “Oh, I get it,” she said. “Emmy these definitely aren't for us. Sorry Uncle Ron!”
“Did you know about this, too?” Anne asked, latching on the chance to pass some of the blame for this fiasco onto Kitten's child. “Honestly, you older girls should be keeping Emmy out of trouble, not pushing her into it.”
“Can't blame this one on me, Aunt Anne,” Marcie insisted. She was still chuckling. Not a bad girl—not bitter like her mother—but definitely a teaser who enjoyed a good joke.
Unfortunately, Kara still didn't understand the punch line.
“I want—” Emmy began.
“Oh, Emmy be quiet!” Hanna snapped.
The girl stopped talking for a moment.
“Ron,” his mother continued. “If there is another present to be given, you should do so now. This unfortunate disruption has gone on quite long enough.”
Whatever the gift was, Kara was quite certain she didn't want to receive it now in front of everyone. “I thought we agreed we weren't going to give each other our presents until tomorrow morning,” she reminded Ron.
Ron squirmed with increasing discomfort. “This isn't so much a Christmas present as an anniversary gift,” he explained. “I've been waiting for the right time to give it to you, and frankly, this isn't the mood or the atmosphere I had in mind.” He stuck the box in his pocket.
“I want my present!” Emmy screamed.
Anne finally got up and went to her daughter while she glared at Ron. “Ron, stop teasing her!” she said. “She's only a child.”
“Me?” Ron responded. “What did I do? I sure as hell didn't send her to go through my coat pockets searching for more presents.”
Kitten smirked, clearly enjoying the fact that Ron was now on the spot with their sister. “I guess this is what happens when you buy something sexy for your girlfriend,” she said. “Come on, let's see them.”
From the way Ron's eyes were darting around, Kara could clearly see that he didn't want to do that. What could he have gotten her?
“Look, Kara and I are planning to exchange in private, and I'm not going to give it to her here.”
He got down on one knee in front of Emmy. “And as for you, if you want to, we can go to the store this weekend and pick out any set of earrings you want to buy.”
Unfortunately, Emmy was in full tantrum mode—a situation exasperated by the excitement of the day and her being up past her bedtime. “I want them now!” she shouted before aiming a vicious little kick at Ron. If this had been Kara's niece or nephew carrying on this way, her sister would have given them a swat on the rear end by now, but Ron's family milled around looking uncertain about how to handle the situation—more damage attributable to Dr. Spock.
Ron fended his niece off for a few moments until her mother finally pulled the little girl away.
“Ron, can't you just give her the damn earrings and buy Kara another gift?” Hanna asked. Her exasperation was plainly evident. Christmas had obviously been ruined for her.
Ron got angrily back to his feet. “No, I can't!” he said firmly.
“But she's having a meltdown!” Hanna snapped at him. “Give them to her to calm her down! Kara doesn't need more jewelry anyway!”
Kara pulled back in on herself, surprised that somehow Hanna had found a way to twist this around and make it her fault.
Ron was already defending her. “Now don't try and make this about Kara!” His voice rose to match his mother's volume. “She didn't ask Emmy to go searching though my pockets either. She didn't even know she was getting a present tonight!”
“Don't you raise your voice to me!” Hanna shouted back.
Emmy picked up on the rising tempers and began to scream louder herself. “I want my present!”
Ron threw his hands up in disgust. “Oh, this is impossible!” He stormed across the room, trying to walk away from the fight. “Come on, Kara!” he ordered. “Let's find our coats and get out of here!”
Hanna strode angrily after him. “Don't you walk away from me when I'm talking to you! And don't you even think of leaving! We're all going to midnight Mass together this evening!”
Kara looked about her, stunned at the explosion. Emmy was still having her tantrum, but compared to what Hanna and Ron were doing, it now looked mild by comparison. Anne tried to quiet her daughter. Most of the rest of Ron's family were looking around with looks of confusion on their faces—the sort of dazed expressions that survivors often have right after an accident.
“Merry effing Christmas,” Kitten said.
* * * *
[Back to Table of Contents]
* * *
Chapter Eight
Ron stayed silent in the car, still fuming after the fight with his mother. His hands were clenched on the steering wheel, knuckles white from the force of his grip. “That woman!” he muttered. His face had flushed red with anger and his expression was disturbingly similar to that of the woman he'd just been arguing with.
Kara decided to attempt to distract him from his troubles. “Have you noticed it's begun snowing?”
“Yes, I've—” Ron began to snap but he got control of himself and bit off his remark before he could finish it.
When he spoke again, it was in a much milder but still agitated tone. “Sorry ab
out that. I'm not angry with you. And yes, I've noticed it's snowing.”
Delicate white flakes flitted through the beams of the headlights and plastered themselves on the windshield of the car. There weren't really enough of them to qualify as a full-fledged snow. It was more like a heavy flurry.
“Brings back memories, doesn't it?” Kara said, still trying to distract Ron from his mother and restore his good mood.
Ron tried to smile for her. “Yes, it does,” he said. “The day that changed our lives.” He reached out and patted her on her knee. “For the better, I hope you'll agree.”
Kara covered Ron's pale hand with her own darker one. “I certainly think so,” she agreed. She squeezed his hand beneath hers, hoping he'd find the gesture reassuring.
Ron's mind, however, was still on his argument with his mother. “I can't believe she actually expected me to give your present to Emmy. I mean, I know Anne's daughter is spoiled, but really!"
The present was something Kara still wanted to explore—not because she was anxious to receive it but because there wasn't supposed to be one tonight and she still didn't understand Kitten and Marcie's comments about it. “What is this gift anyway?” Kara asked. “We agreed not to exchange today, remember? It's not fair for you to give me something when I didn't get something for you.”
Ron shrugged. He kept his eyes on the road, which made sense since he was driving, but the fact that he didn't even glance at her made his answer sound defensive to Kara. “It's not really a Christmas present,” Ron said. “It's just a little something to celebrate meeting you a year ago today.”
Kara felt like Ron was playing lawyer with her. Yes they had technically agreed to wait to exchange only their Christmas presents until tomorrow morning, but that was because Kara hadn't realized there would be other presents to exchange. She felt guilty that she hadn't thought of getting Ron an anniversary gift as well. She wasn't cheap, but Ron was more comfortable spending money than she was. She wasn't certain, but she thought he made considerably more than she did and of course it didn't hurt that his parents were clearly in the habit of giving him large financial gifts as well.
“And it's not a ring?” she clarified. The question surprised her even as it drew a sly appraising glance from Ron. She already knew it wasn't a ring. She'd been relieved it hadn't been a ring, hadn't she? So why was she asking him about it now?
“It's not the sort of ring you put on your finger,” Ron told her. “Were you looking for the other sort of ring?”
His voice had a decidedly odd edge to it. Was he teasing her?
“No, of course not,” Kara said. “We haven't been dating long enough to get engaged.” Except that they'd been dating for a year as of today and lots of people got engaged within a year. If twelve months weren't enough, then what was the magic number Kara was looking for?
“Because if you want one,” Ron continued as he turned a corner that took them past that sledding hill again, “we should talk about it. You're the one who got all nervous when I moved in with you. You're the one who's freaking out because we're spending so much time together.”
Now that made Kara mad. “I am not freaking out because we're spending so much time together!” she told him. Really, the idea was completely ridiculous. “I'm freaking out because you're changing! All you want is sex these days! A relationship is a lot more than sex!”
Ron abruptly pulled his Jeep over to the side of the road as he had earlier on their way to his parents’ house. He did it so quickly that Kara expected him to start shouting at her or do something over the top like order her out of the car, but when he twisted in the driver's seat to speak to her, his voice was firmly under control. He didn't really seem angry, just incredibly earnest. “I do want to have sex with you!” he told her. “Every day, every hour, every time I see you, every time I hear your voice or smell your perfume I want to pull you down on the floor and lock my lips on yours while my hands roam over your beautiful body. That doesn't mean I don't enjoy all the other things—lying in bed together while you tell me about your day, holding hands while we stroll through the mall, flipping the burgers on the grill while you work with your flowers or reading you a passage from the newspaper while you cook us breakfast. I'm in love with you and I want everything about you all the time!”
He reached out and touched the underside of Kara's chin with the tip of his finger, making certain she was looking directly at him. “That includes your body, Kara. I'm not ever going to stop wanting your body. A year ago, our physical attraction is what brought us together, and it was a loss of physical attraction that broke you up with that asshole, Bobby. We promised each other—I don't remember the exact words anymore—but we promised each other sex, sex, and more sex because we knew then that the physical relationship is just as important as the emotional one. When your lover stops wanting you it kills the soul—destroys your self-esteem—and breeds intense unhappiness. So if you're telling me you don't want me anymore, we need to talk about that and figure out what to do. Maybe we should try counseling. Maybe we should...”
Ron's voice trailed off and Kara suddenly realized he'd almost said maybe we should break up. She didn't want to break up with him! As frustrated as she'd been with him since he moved in with her, she definitely was not ready to break up.
She took a deep breath and tried to focus her thoughts, then folded her hands around his. “Ron, I don't want to stop having sex with you. I think we both know that I really—” She broke off for a moment as a shudder of remembered climaxes worked its way up her body. “That I really enjoy making love to you. But maybe the balance has become a little skewed. Everything shouldn't be about sex. And now that we're living together it seems to me that we-”
She hesitated a moment trying to think of a nice way to say this, but sometimes being a little crude really was the best way to make a point. “Now that we're living together it seems that fucking is most of what we do. We don't really talk that much anymore—not like we used to.”
Ron took a deep breath. For a moment he reminded Kara of a racehorse, all jumpy and filled with nervous energy while he waited for the gunshot which would start the race. It was as if he wanted to leap in and tell her she was wrong, but instead was forcing himself to think about what she had said.
“Maybe we don't talk as much as we used to,” Ron admitted. “We did a lot of that talking on the phone because we couldn't get together. But it just doesn't seem like wanting you all the time should be a bad thing. It doesn't seem to me like this is the real problem.”
Wanting her wasn't a bad thing, Kara was willing to concede, but she didn't tell Ron this. Instead she focused on the last thing he had said. “And what do you think the real problem is?”
Ron didn't answer her. Instead he put the car back into gear and started down the road again. The snow continued to fall—light compared to the storms of last year, but it was early yet. They were only supposed to get one to three inches, but Kara didn't really trust the weather forecasts anymore. It must be nice to have a job where you can be wrong all the time and no one holds you accountable for it. “What do you think the real problem is?” Kara repeated.
Ron glanced over at her, taking his eyes from the road for longer than Kara was truly comfortable with. His expression was deadly serious with no hint of a teasing lightness in his gaze. “I don't know for sure,” he said, “but I think that in part it's a control issue.”
Kara started to protest but Ron cut her off. “No, listen to me! You can tell me I'm wrong when I'm done.” He braked suddenly and cut hard on the steering wheel to avoid hitting a car he had drifted toward as he argued. “You lived by yourself for a very long time. You're used to having total control over your own space and now you don't have it anymore. I bet it bothered you to have my stuff start showing up in your house while we were dating, but now that it's permanent, you're losing your patience with me. Everything I do irritates you these days.”
He broke off as if the subject matter was so painfu
l that he couldn't complete his thoughts.
For her part, Kara felt astounded to learn that Ron was even thinking these things. “You don't irritate me, Ron.”
“Yes, I do!” Ron insisted. “But it's worse than that. I think you're sorry I moved in with you. I kind of forced the issue this summer and stupidly announced it before we could talk it over. So let's face it, moving in together was really my decision—not our decision like it should have been. And you understandably resent that. But it's worse than that, too. You don't like the invasion of your personal space. How many times have you complained that you don't have enough room in your closets anymore? You didn't like my X-Box being hooked up to your main television so I had to set up a TV in the guest room for it. You-”
“That's enough!” Kara snapped. She was starting to get angry now. What a perfect way to spend Christmas Eve and their one-year anniversary—fighting in the car after a miserable evening at his parents’ house. “I am not—”
Ron just kept on talking. “And I think that's the root of your problem with us having sex all the time, too. When we were dating, you were in control of when we got together, which meant you decided when we could have sex. Now that we live with each other, I have a lot more control over when I can take you in my arms and there's something you just don't like about that.”
“That is not true!” Kara shouted at him. “I am not some controlling bitch!"
“Then what the hell do you think the problem is?” Ron shouted back.
“Maybe you're just too damn randy all the time and you don't know what a real relationship is about!” Kara yelled back.
“You're not the first woman I ever dated!” Ron snapped.
Kara felt a stab of pain in her heart. Ron rarely mentioned past girlfriends and the fact that he would bring one up now while they were fighting seemed particularly cruel to her. “If that's what you want, why don't you go date one again?” Even as the words left her mouth she felt a shock of horror. Had she really just said that? What the hell was wrong with her tonight? What the hell was wrong with both of them?
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