by J. L. Weil
“Bri,” he growled. “Let’s just focus on figuring out why granny dearest is suddenly interested in you. We can deal with…other stuff later.”
It was a start, and far better than not seeing him at all. “Does that mean you’ll be back in school on Monday, and you’re talking to me again?”
He laid his dark head back and stared at the ceiling. “I guess Monday is as good as any.”
A sprinkle of hope trickled within me. I would be able to see him every day again. There was nothing right now I wanted more than time with him, however I got it.
He swallowed hard. “Have you seen him?”
Then my exhilaration came crashing down. I stared at my hands. “Yeah. He’s been helping me learn to control my magic.”
It was extremely difficult for him to hear. Lines of strain pulsed at the sides of his temples. “Is it working?” he asked, the words sounding forced.
I sighed. “Some. I was able to move an object from across the room.” I tucked my legs up against my chest.
He ran the back of his knuckles down my check, and his eyes grew sad. I couldn’t stop the shiver or the drop in my heart. “It really should be me.” He pushed off the bed, and I was helpless to do anything.
I watched him walk out the door. I squeezed my eyes shut and swore.
He might be right. Maybe I was making a huge mistake with Lukas. I wasn’t sure of anything anymore. Who was right? Who was wrong? Who to trust? I felt like my head was going to fall off.
So much for talking to him. I’d spent most of our short time together with my tongue down his throat. Not that I was complaining, it had been glorious. The problem was I didn’t know if and when it would happen again.
And I so wanted it to happen again.
Chapter 14
I HAD MY HEAD PROPPED on my hands, daydreaming about nothing in particular, when I heard the door to the shop chime. Smoothing my red turtleneck, I slapped on a smile and glanced up. A sprinkle of magic danced along my skin, announcing my guest was a witch. I was getting better at recognizing the feeling. The warm greeting I had on my lips never made it out. My smile lessened as I stared at eyes green like rolling plains.
Lukas.
This was unexpected. What was he doing here, at the shop nonetheless?
He sauntered leisurely across the shop until he stood in front of me with a saucy grin. It wasn’t nearly as lethal as Gavin’s, but still effective. He was apparently really fond of college T-shirts. This one was gray and stretched across his wide chest. I would have to be dead to not appreciate his hotness.
“Hey.” My voice gave away my surprise. I wasn’t going to lie; I was shocked to see him, but I had this coming. I’d been sort of avoiding him all weekend, and now looking at him, I was guilt-ridden. Apparently, he found another way to catch me after I dodged all his calls and texts.
Sometimes I could be such a shitty friend. Procrastination should be my middle name. It was mostly the practicing that I had been eluding, not Lukas.
Well, maybe Lukas a little.
“I hadn’t heard from you. I hope it’s okay that I just popped in?” There was such a sincere and boyish charm to him.
I smiled. “Of course. I’m sorry I didn’t return your calls. I’ve been super busy.” I cringed inside. What a lame excuse.
His hip leaned against the counter, bringing our faces closer. “Busy with Gavin?”
Did I detect a hint of jealousy? Hmm. I wasn’t entirely sure I liked his implication. Or that he in fact was spot on. Was I that readable? “Maybe.”
He raised one of those emerald eyes at me. God, he was like a walking lie detector, and I stunk at evasion.
I stepped back putting space between us. “Fine. I had to talk to him, okay? I needed to make him understand,” I defended, sounding slightly desperate.
“And how did that go?” he asked with a tint of sarcasm, as if he already knew the answer. It put me on the defense.
I crossed my arms over my chest and tried to suppress the pout I could feel coming on. “Just fine, if you must know.”
“Liar.” He smirked.
Grrr. He could be so infuriating. And perceptive. This time I gave him a full-out pout. “Why is my life so complicated?” I mumbled, mostly to myself.
Walking around the glass counter, he closed the distance between us. He trailed a finger under my chin, causing a tiny spark. “Because you skipped practice.”
I rolled my eyes. Practice. Ugh.
I ignored the fluttering in my chest. He was right. I hadn’t been making an effort. It was time to change that, especially after my new heritage discovery. His close proximity was sending out the wrong signals. I wanted to be friends, and I needed to start lying down the ground rules. “You’re right,” I conceded and retreated a step.
He took a step forward, putting us back at square one. “You free after work?” He cornered me with his muscular body.
I had to stop avoiding this…magic. And it would give me the chance to tell him I just wanted to be friends. Nothing romantic. So I heard myself say, “Yeah, why not?”
He grinned like sunshine. It was startling and potent. I swallowed, trying not to get caught up in his smile. “Don’t sound so enthusiastic. You know how to make a guy feel special.”
“Whatever.” I playfully pushed at his chest. He didn’t budge. “You know what I meant. I’m not exactly a pro at this magic jazz.” I lowered my voice over the last bit. I could never be too careful, especially with my aunt lingering in the back room.
And what perfect timing, as my aunt strolled through the workroom area into the shop. Lukas and I both turned our heads at the squeaking hinges. We were pretty close, our bodies almost brushing. His arm shot out to steady me as I practically gave myself whiplash at my aunt’s sudden appearance.
There was inquisitiveness in her eyes as she assessed the situation. Oh boy, I was going to be answering a parade of questions after Lukas left. Running a hand through my dark hair, I cast my eyes to my feet. Lukas casually stepped aside and flashed my aunt a dimpled grin worthy of an award.
He turned the charm on, and had my aunt laughing like a schoolgirl. She liked him, but was confused by what was going on between the two of us. Numerous times I caught her glance volleying between Lukas and me as she tried to figure out our relationship. The ease Lukas and I had together was apparent. Obviously that felt odd to my aunt, considering she’d never even heard of Lukas. It was clear we knew each other on a personal level.
Lukas bumped my hip with his, pulling me out of my own lost thoughts. “I’ll see you later?” he asked.
My aunt raised a brow. Peachy. I nodded and watched him walk out the door.
She waited a whole two seconds before pouncing like a cat. “I guess I’m not the only one who has been keeping secrets,” she said. I had that coming, I really did. “I take it that was the other guy.”
Oh man, if she only knew that half of it. I shrugged. “It’s no big deal.”
Smooth. Real smooth. There was no way in hell she was going to buy a line like that. Not after the way she saw us together. It had been evident we knew each other on more than just a friendly basis. Not that I blamed her. I didn’t even believe it wasn’t a big deal.
“That…” she indicated to the door. “Was definitely a big deal. Does Gavin know about Lukas?”
The dreaded question. “Yes,” I replied, like it should have been obvious they knew about each other.
“And is he okay with it?”
Did she have to ask all the questions I didn’t want to answer? I leaned an elbow on the counter, drawing circles into the glass. “Define okay.”
“Brianna,” she scolded in a stern voice.
I hated that voice. It meant that I’d done something wrong. Immediately, I felt like I had let her down in some way. It was a horrid feeling. She was the one person I never wanted to disappoint. I dropped my head onto my arms. “I’m so confused,” I admitted in a small, weak voice.
She ran her fingers dow
n my hair. “When did this happen?”
I sighed into the cool glass, steaming it up with my breath. “Just recently. A few weeks.” This was partly true, if you discount all the dreams. Then suddenly boom…two guys. “I don’t know what to do.” At this point, I wasn’t above whining.
“You’ve got yourself in quite the quandary. I can’t tell you who to choose, if that is what you are asking. That is entirely up to you.”
She wasn’t being much help here. Was it too much to ask her to make such a decision for me? I was really desperate to get my life back to simpler days, with simpler problems.
Her fingers continued to stroke my hair offering me comfort. “I’m not sure I am cool with you seeing a college guy. And I am for sure not cool with you dating two guys.”
I groaned, lifting my head. “First, I am not seeing Lukas. At least not in the way you think. We’re…friends. And second, he is only a year older than me. I will be in college next year,” I reminded her, assuming college was still on the agenda. It all depended on this whole witch thing, and if I made it through high school. “Third, technically I am not dating either of them.” But a huge part of me wanted to—desperately, but which one? I was pretty sure I already knew the answer. I had known all along.
If my aunt knew about my after school curriculum, it would send her to an early grave. My senior year had been eventful. What other kinds of trouble could I possibly get myself into?
“Hmm,” she said, totally sounding unconvinced. “If you say so.”
Who could fault her? I was hardly that persuasive. But that was the end of the discussion, for now. I was sure I wouldn’t be hearing the last of it.
After my shift, I left my aunt at the shop to close. That gave Lukas and me at least an hour to get some magic mojo in. Joy. I needed to get my game face on.
Even in the dark twilight sky, Lukas was like a ray of sunshine. He was leaning against my house as I pulled into the driveway. I killed my headlights, cut the engine, and sat there staring at his majestic dimples. My heart warmed. It was a slow, languid feeling, not like the thunderstruck stuff I got when I was with Gavin. This was gentle, soft, safe.
Our hour together went much smoother and faster than our previous practice. I’d gotten the hang of moving things, including the family room couch. No object too large or small, too heavy or too light.
Turned out, Lukas was a pretty darn good teacher. Or maybe it was that he understood how my magic worked. He claimed our energy was similar, and I couldn’t deny his logic. There was something different in the air when we used magic together. I shuddered to think what we could do if I actually knew how to be a real witch.
In all honesty, I was kind of anxious to test out the bounds of power. When I was with Lukas, there was a call inside me, begging me to answer.
“That was awesome!” I totally sounded like a geek, but there weren’t any words I could come up with to describe the feelings of wielding magic. It was spectacular. I felt amazing, a rush of exhilaration that lit me up from the inside.
Lukas’s eyes were bright and brimming with vigor. I could tell that his power was at the surface, ready to come out and play. He wanted to use magic with me. “You did amazing.”
Suddenly he was a whole lot closer than he had been a second ago. I hadn’t even seen him move. My cheeks were flushed from concentration, and my eyes mirrored the glow of magic. They shimmered like the aurora borealis on a cool autumn night. Splendid.
His hand slid across my back, curving around my waist. I held my breath for what I knew was to come. My mouth opened, but no words came out. A retreat should have been on the tip of my tongue, but there was just the need to lose myself, to go with this feeling of being on top of the world. Untouchable.
And maybe a little bit of anticipation.
Could the boy next door make my world burn like Gavin? Make me forget the loneliness and sadness? It was for all the wrong reasons, yet it still happened. Again. This time there was no dream as an alibi.
I closed my eyes, and Lukas whispered my name. His lips brushed lightly over mine at first, gentle, testing my response. With the slightest pressure at my waist, he inched me closer. I placed my hands on his arms, and his lips swept over mine, deepening the kiss. My fingers tightened on his muscles, overwhelmed by the elation. He kissed like his lips were born for kissing.
Yet, I kept waiting on the edge of his breathless kisses, waiting for anything but emptiness and restlessness. No matter how much I wanted to wash away the sadness, anger, and hurt, this wasn’t the way to go about it. I was not only using Lukas, I was hurting myself more.
I broke our lips apart, and I stared up at his clouded, dark green eyes. He was breathing heavily, studying me. There hadn’t been anything wrong with the kiss. Sure, it lacked the wow factor, but I could blame that on Gavin. The rest was all me. I was turning everything into a gigantic mess, making one bad decision after another, just so I could feel better. It was wrong, pathetic, and not me.
Guilt poured through me.
I had a funny way of attempting to make things better with Gavin. Kissing Lukas wasn’t going to win me trust points, and I was leading Lukas on, both things I didn’t want to do.
My heart hadn’t been into the kiss, for one good reason.
I was hung up on Gavin. I was more than hung up—I was a goner, head-over-heels crazy about him. My heart had been lost to him the day I smacked into him while ditching school.
Lukas read the string of emotions galloping through my eyes. I didn’t want to hurt Lukas any more than I had wanted to hurt Gavin.
Slowly he tucked a strand of loose hair behind my ear. “I’ll call you later?” He left the question dangling in the air between us.
I nodded, head still swirling with recriminations and revelations.
Chapter 15
THANKSGIVING DINNER.
The holiday wasn’t going to be dull, that’s for sure. Not only was my aunt bringing the new guy, she had also insisted that I invite Lukas. Once she found he was going to be spending the holiday alone, she had pressed me relentlessly, until even I felt guilt-ridden.
So here I was, preparing for a very awkward evening.
How do I even get myself into these situations?
Lukas and I had talked a little since the kiss, but never about the kiss itself. I was much better at ignoring things than I was at lying. Still, seeing him face-to-face for the first time since was going to be…challenging.
This past week at school had been short due to the holiday, so I still had seen very little of Gavin, to my heart’s dismay. I’d been hoping to find time to talk, but the measly fifty minutes during chemistry didn’t allow for deep conversations. I missed him terribly, and really wanted to get things back to how they’d been, instead of this indecisive insanity I was always feeling.
As it turned out, my relationship with Gavin was in limbo. I wasn’t sure what steps were necessary to repair the damage I’d caused. Not only did I need a guidebook on witchcraft, I also needed one on boys.
Blow drying my soaking-wet hair, I sat in front of my mirror, wrestling with the tangles. My stomach was twisted in loops. This thing must be more serious with the new guy than I realized, for my aunt to have him over for Thanksgiving dinner. I wasn’t entirely sure how I felt about it. Might sound selfish, and I am sure it was, but I was used to having Aunt Clara all to myself. I found that sharing her with a guy didn’t exactly sit well in my belly. Not that I didn’t like him. He seemed nice enough, and he made her happy. That should have been adequate.
I threw on a pair of jeans and a glitzy black sweater, only applying a light coat of makeup. I wasn’t really feeling the holiday spirit. My phone buzzed on the vanity as I finished my mascara. Unlocking the screen, it was a text from Sophie, wishing me a happy Thanksgiving.
I don’t know why, but it made me sad. I guess thoughts of Gavin were never far from my mind. My fingers punched over the keys as I sent her a quick text back wishing her the same, and then shook the depre
ssing thoughts from my head. This wasn’t the time to be ungrateful.
Heading down the stairs, I heard my aunt whistling cheerfully in the kitchen. The holidays were one of the few days we were both at home, with no school and no duties to the shop. I treasured the holidays, even if this one felt a little funky.
She was at the sink, her caramel hair in a messy bun with a stylish apron tied at her waist. Well, as hip as an apron could be. She had the silly, spacey look of someone on the brink of love. I had that same look not too long ago. Still did whenever I saw Gavin. She seasoned the turkey unaware she had an audience. My heart warmed inside, seeing that lovely glow of happiness shine on her beautiful face.
Quietly, I stepped beside her and hopped up on the counter. “Hey. You need any help?”
She grinned, the dreamy look clearing from her eyes. “Sure, I would love some help. Think you can handle the table?”
Thousands of memories bombarded me. I rolled my eyes. “Please. It’s only been my job since I was five.” I jumped to the floor.
“Brianna?” she called my name before I stepped out of the room.
I spun around. “Yeah?”
“I know you said you were okay with having Chad over for dinner, but are you really…okay with it? This is your home too, and I don’t want you to ever feel uncomfortable or put out.”
I gave the biggest, best, most reassuring smile I could. Whether she would say it or not, I knew this evening was important to her—a monstrous step. I even believed the invitation to Lukas had been her small way of trying to make me more comfortable, so to speak, regardless, she hit way off mark. It wasn’t her fault I’d screwed things up so badly. “Of course it is. This is going to be the best Thanksgiving. Just wait and see.”
She beamed at me, satisfied that I was truly cool with it. Something told me that this would be a memorable holiday.
My aunt was all about visual appeal. It was just as important that the table be beautifully decorated as it was for the food to be scrumptious. Spreading a glittery gold tablecloth on our dining room table, I put my mind to setting the places. Each seat had a deep cherry placemat with cream-colored china and a gold-rimmed glass goblet. I still wasn’t sure why we needed so many forks, spoons, and knives. Why couldn’t I use the same fork for my salad and dinner? I wasn’t much for fancy, but it appeased my aunt. I should be thankful she didn’t insist I wear a dress. That would have been a battle.
