by Anna Sugden
“Anyway, Lee doesn’t dictate my wardrobe now.”
“He may not handpick your outfits, but he’s still influencing the way you dress. You’ve gone to the opposite extreme. Other than your shoes, there’s not a high-end label in sight. The styles are fine, but the colors are boring.”
“Thanks a lot.”
“I’m not being mean,” her sister said gently. “I just think you could find something that’s more you. Don’t you miss wearing designer clothes?”
“Of course,” she admitted reluctantly.
“You sound like you’re confessing to a terrible crime. Who doesn’t like wearing nice things?” Tracy grinned. “With matching shoes, naturally.”
Maggie’s answering smile faded. “But it’s a slippery slope.”
It would be so easy to slide into that life again. First the clothes, then the glamorous parties and events. But the price to be paid was one she couldn’t afford.
“One step at a time. Let’s change some outfits before we start worrying about the red carpet and the paparazzi. I’ll help you keep your feet on the ground.”
It would be nice to spread her wings a little, fashionwise. Maybe simply wearing what she liked would be enough that the rest of that seductive lifestyle wouldn’t call to her. “I could give it a try.”
“Great. You can start by ditching anything beige, gray or brown. Try flowers, polka dots, stripes—anything but plain. What about those pretty summer dresses you brought with you?”
“I thought they’d be too casual, but if you’re sure they’re okay, I’ll wear them. They’ll definitely be more comfortable in this heat. Speaking of which—” Maggie checked her watch “—I’m meeting Jake at Mimi’s office in an hour for another trawl through the listings.”
“I bet he’ll find those dresses more attractive, too.”
“I won’t dress to impress Jake.” Maggie frowned. “Worrying about his reaction is no different to worrying about Lee’s.”
“All right. Point made.” Tracy held her hands up in mock surrender. “Then wear it to impress yourself. Now shoo and get changed. That’s an order.”
“Yes, boss.”
Maggie had to admit, half an hour later, the cheerful, pink flowers all over her cotton summer dress made her feel brighter, putting a spring in her step as she headed next door to say goodbye to Emily.
Though her daughter was more interested in the fort she was building with Amy, she stopped long enough to pass comment on what Maggie was wearing.
“You look really pretty, Mummy.” She hugged Maggie, then dashed off.
It warmed her heart to see Emily back to her normal, sunny self. Walking to her car, Maggie marveled at how easily her daughter had adjusted to her new life. Time for her to take a page from Emily’s book—get on with living her life, her way.
She just had to work out what her way was.
When she arrived at Mimi’s office, Jake was leaning against his SUV, talking on his cell. Maggie waved cheerfully.
Her smile faded as he scowled, then shook his head sharply. Her heart pinched, even as she told herself this wasn’t the past. Jake wouldn’t take his anger out on her. She ignored the tiny voice inside that reminded her of his behavior at the house with the fishpond.
“Damn it. I don’t have time for this.” Smack!
Maggie tried not to flinch as he slammed his palm against the side of his SUV. She tried to tamp down the flutters of panic in her stomach as she backed away slowly, inching toward the door of Mimi’s office building.
“I said no.” Smack!
She froze, her pulse skittering. Memories of that last night with Lee flashed through her mind. The past merged with the present.
Jake paced. Her eyes followed his angry movements, watching for the first sign that his ire had switched to her.
He turned and stepped toward her. Fury blazed in his ice-blue eyes. He said nothing, but his clenched fist was message enough.
CHAPTER FOUR
“I DON’T care how much money Adam owed you, I won’t let you cash in on his death.”
Jake’s grip on his cell phone tightened as he pounded his other fist on his thigh. Nick’s plan disgusted him.
“Come on, man,” Adam’s former roommate whined. “Fans pay crazy money on eBay for hockey memorabilia. His stuff is just lying around the apartment in boxes.”
“Give it all to charity, like the Stewarts wanted.”
“That was only a suggestion. Adam’s parents said I could do what I wanted with it.”
“I don’t think an online yard sale was what they had in mind.” Jake pinched the bridge of his nose, trying not to lose what little remained of his temper. “If you don’t want to take the boxes with you to L.A., have them sent to me.”
“So you can keep all the money for yourself.”
“No, damn it. I’ve told you, I don’t want any part of your sick scheme.”
“Your loss. I only offered you a chance to get in on the deal because I felt sorry for you.”
There was no reasoning with the guy. Though Jake hated to resort to threats, he knew it was the only language Nick would understand. “You touch anything in those boxes and I’ll tell the Hawks and the Kings what you’re doing.”
“You wouldn’t dare.” Despite the bravado in Nick’s voice, there was an underlying thread of nervousness. “Besides, they wouldn’t believe you. Not when I tell them you’re having a breakdown because of your guilt over Adam’s death.”
The malicious jab stole Jake’s breath as effectively as if Nick had speared him in the gut with his stick. He rode the pain for a few moments, then used it to fuel his determination. No way he’d let Nick auction off Adam’s memory for a few lousy bucks.
“I’m warning you, if you try to sell even one item, I will personally see to it your career is over. You won’t even be able to ride a bus in the minors.”
Nick’s laugh had a desperate ring. “You don’t have that kind of influence.”
“You’d be surprised how quickly I could spread the word. Guys get mad when they think someone is taking advantage. Do you really want to be the target of their anger?”
Jake’s words hung menacingly in the air.
Nick swore. “Fine. You want his stuff so badly, you come and collect it. You’ve got one week. After that, everything goes in the nearest Dumpster.”
The last thing Jake wanted was to have to deal with Adam’s things. He didn’t need to be reminded that he was a pale shadow of the man his friend had been. He sure as hell didn’t need to be reminded of how he’d let Adam down.
It had been bad enough living in Chicago, surrounded by memories of coming up from the minors together, being drafted together, winning and losing together. Since he’d moved home, he’d finally begun to come to terms with what had happened. Not a day passed that he didn’t remember and regret, but he’d managed some semblance of peace.
Nick’s demand had shattered that fragile peace and ripped open still-raw wounds.
Jake had no choice. He owed Adam that much. “You make damn sure everything is still there—every last sock, button and scrap of paper. Screw with me and you’ll regret it.”
He hung up and jammed his cell into the front pocket of his jeans, then smacked the flat of his hand against his M-Class.
Damn Nick. Jake had never understood why Nick and Adam had been so close. Adam was a good, honest, hardworking guy. Nick took shortcuts, looked for the easy way. This was a new low.
Jake scrubbed his hand over his jaw and tried to calm his anger.
A flutter of pink reminded him Maggie was here. He forced himself to shove the problem to the back of his mind—he didn’t want to spoil the afternoon.
The thought of huddling around Mimi’s computer, the warmth of Maggie’s soft skin so close, was enough to make
his pulse pound with frustration of a different kind.
Where would the buttons be today? His groin tightened as he recalled yesterday’s Chinese-style gray dress. The knotted silk buttons had started at the base of her throat and trailed their way across her left breast. Enough!
He turned toward Maggie.
What the hell...?
She stood by the door to the building, staring at him, her hand across her mouth. Her ashen skin made her brown eyes look even darker.
She looked scared.
Confused, he stepped toward her.
He halted abruptly when she pressed herself against the door.
“Maggie?”
Her lips trembled, even as her chin tilted defiantly.
What was her problem? Like a slow-mo replay, he reviewed the past few minutes—his anger, his threats, his actions—then swore silently, as he realized Maggie was scared.
Of him.
She probably believed that clichéd crap about hockey players being violent because they played a physical game. Sure, he’d fought off the ice in the past, but only because some knucklehead had thrown a punch to prove how tough he was. Jake hadn’t fought in anger since he was a kid. And he’d never, ever, hit a woman.
Maggie wouldn’t know that. He had to put her at ease. Slowly, he raised his hands, palm out, to show he meant no harm.
“Are you okay?” He kept his voice calm and low.
She stilled, nodding sharply. Her dark brown eyes never left him.
Perhaps he should explain. “That was a former teammate on the Blackhawks—Nick. He used to share an apartment with Adam. I guess you know I was injured in a car accident?”
She nodded again, watching him warily.
“My friend Adam...it was Adam’s car. He was driving. He lost control and—” he coughed to clear the lump in his throat “—was killed.”
The bald statement left a bitter taste, but Maggie didn’t need to know about Adam’s weird behavior on that drive. His trembling fingers on the gearshift, the sweat beading on his forehead. How he’d veered between moods as wildly as he’d swerved between lanes.
She also didn’t need to know Jake had deliberately ignored the signs Adam was troubled because he’d cared more about getting to the party than finding out what was wrong.
Maggie’s expression softened slightly. The sadness in her eyes hardened his emotions. Jake didn’t want, or deserve, her sympathy.
He stepped closer. Her body remained tense but she didn’t flinch.
“Nick’s been traded to L.A.” He quickly explained the bastard’s demands to Maggie. “With house-hunting and training camp about to start, the timing sucks. But I have to rescue Adam’s stuff.”
Maggie’s shoulders had loosened a little as she’d listened to him. When he was done, she said quietly, “May I make a suggestion?”
Damn, the way she bit her lip like that said she was still nervous about him. “Sure.”
“I could arrange for a packer to go in and collect Adam’s boxes, then have them delivered when you find a house.” Her voice grew stronger. “It’ll save you the trip.”
Adam’s things would be safely out of Nick’s reach and he wouldn’t have to deal with them until he was ready. A huge weight lifted off his shoulders.
He smiled. “You’re a lifesaver. Thanks, Maggie.”
“All part of the service.” She reached in her bag for her ever-present pad. “If you write down the necessary information, I’ll sort it out.”
Jake was returning her pad when Mimi pushed through the door.
“There you are. Come in out of this heat.”
“Be right there.” Maggie slipped the pad into her purse and joined the real-estate agent.
As he followed her to Mimi’s office, Maggie’s stiff body language reminded him of what had happened earlier, her fearful reaction to his anger. His mind began to whir with images of other incidents—her jittery behavior at their first meeting, her defensiveness when he’d challenged her, the way she’d flinched when he’d touched her in that damn house with the fishpond. Were her reactions more than concern about an aggressive hockey player? Was something in her past coloring her judgment? Had someone treated her badly?
It made a strange kind of sense.
Fury surged within him at the thought of anyone mistreating her, but he tamped it down. That wouldn’t help either of them. He’d just have to be careful how he acted with her.
No sooner had the thought crossed his mind than guilt twisted Jake’s stomach.
Who was he kidding? He’d let Adam down, a guy he’d been friends with nearly all his life. What the hell made him think he could do better with a woman he’d known for a few weeks and whose past could involve problems more serious than the pressures of the NHL?
On the surface, Maggie appeared to be the perfect woman for him to date. But if he was right, what lay beneath made things a whole lot more complicated. Despite the sizzling attraction, complicated was a distraction he didn’t need.
More importantly, he wasn’t the right man for Maggie. She didn’t need a man she’d always doubt because of his career. A man whose emotions were still too raw, as his argument with Nick had shown. Maggie needed someone she could count on to be there for her. Not one who doubted himself.
“Are you ready, Jake?” Mimi’s voice cut through the tumult inside him.
Realizing he still stood in the doorway, he cleared his head, then went to sit in a chair in front of Mimi’s computer.
Maggie kept her distance, leaning against the desk instead of sitting beside him, as she usually did. A new tension hummed in the air between them.
“What have you got?” he asked.
“There are two new properties.” Mimi clicked on the local listings. “The split-level is nice, but nothing special. I think you’ll like the other one, though.”
She was right about the first house. He leaned forward to check out the second. His pulse quickened at the picture of the elegant Victorian. Jake hoped the on-screen details weren’t exaggerated. From the wraparound porch and the dark green shutters to the white picket fence and the large yard full of old trees, this house was everything he’d hoped for.
This one felt right.
Before he could stop himself, he looked up to see what Maggie thought. Their eyes locked. His heart stuttered. Excitement zinged through his veins.
Then the hesitance in her gaze registered, making his body stiffen.
Deliberately, he turned away.
“Looks great, Mimi.” He grinned at the agent. “I have a real good feeling about this one. I want to go and see it ASAP. When can you fix something up?”
“I’ll make an appointment for tomorrow morning. Is that okay?”
“Sure. Thanks.”
“Tomorrow morning’s good for me, too.” Maggie leaned over to direct his attention to the large den.
Heat rushed through him as her scent teased his nostrils. Sparks shot up his arm where her fingertips brushed him.
Damn it. He had to get out of here.
He pushed back the chair and stood. “Are we done?”
Both women looked startled by his abrupt tone.
“Uh, yes.” Mimi sent a questioning look at Maggie, who nodded.
Jake’s goodbye skated the edges of politeness. He didn’t draw a steady breath until he pulled into his parents’ drive.
Turning off the ignition, he slumped in his seat. Back to square one. Well, maybe square one and a half—the house did look perfect. That, and hockey, was enough for now.
Finding the perfect woman would just have to wait.
* * *
BY THE TIME Maggie pulled into Tracy’s driveway, she was drained and weary.
The afternoon’s emotional roller coaster had left her as
wrung out as a damp dishcloth. The throb over her left eye warned of a looming tension headache. She rested her head on the steering wheel, trying to summon up the energy to get out of the car and go into the house.
If she’d needed any more reasons for why Jake Badoletti was wrong for her, the incident at Mimi’s office had provided plenty.
She wasn’t a fool. She knew Jake wasn’t Lee. There was something about him, his character and his values, that set him apart from her ex. She’d barely known him a week, had hardly scratched the surface of who he was, yet the differences were clearly visible.
Sadly, the similarities were clearly visible, too. His quick temper when things didn’t go his way, the sudden switches from charming to furious to cold indifference and back again.
Patterns of behavior that, this time, she wouldn’t...couldn’t ignore.
Tap, tap.
She jerked upright. Emily stood next to the car.
Maggie opened the car door and gave her daughter a tired smile.
“You’re too old to have a nap, Mummy.” As usual, Emily looked like she’d been through the wars. A bandage on one knee and mud stains on her shorts.
“You’re never too old to need a nap.” Maggie plucked a leaf out of one loose braid. “When you get to be as old as me, you’ll look forward to an afternoon snooze.”
“I don’t want to be that old, ever.” Emily grinned. “I want to show you the fort Amy and me made.”
Maggie allowed her daughter to pull her out of the car. If only they could bottle Emily’s energy—her ancient body could use the boost. She massaged her aching temple, then plastered a cheery expression on her face.
Emily wasn’t fooled. “Are you all right, Mummy?” Her wide-eyed gaze swept Maggie from head to toe. “Did that Mr. Bad Boy hurt you?”
Her shaky words drove a dagger into Maggie’s heart. “No one hurt me. I had a busy afternoon and probably did too much in this horrid heat.”
Concern furrowed Emily’s brow, making her look older than her years.
Maggie damned herself for not having had the courage to leave her marriage sooner. For not realizing the emotional damage Lee had done to their daughter. Though he hadn’t laid a hand on his daughter until that final night, she’d borne witness to too much. Maggie would never let that kind of ugliness touch Emily’s life again.
