Wendy didn’t look at him herself. She waited just an instant, hoping he would answer before she was forced to. But he didn’t utter a word. “Just a few days,” she said finally. “I have things I must do in Phoenix.”
Why hadn’t the man bought her a round-trip ticket?
She had to admit that by not setting a deadline for her return, Mack had been more generous than she had expected. More generous, probably, than Elinor and Samuel Burgess would have been. On the other hand, that very generosity could be used as blackmail, in a way. As long as she was cautious, made no waves, caused no trouble, she could stay for a while. But the slightest difficulty and Mack wouldn’t have to wait for the date on her ticket to arrive; he could have her on a plane in a matter of hours.
Don’t be silly, she told herself. He could do that anyway. And he would; Mack Burgess wouldn’t quibble about the cost of an airline ticket more or less, if that was the only price for getting rid of a young woman who suddenly became troublesome.
So why hadn’t he bought a return ticket?
Rory leaned out of her arms and grabbed for the pen in Mack’s shirt pocket. “Oh, you’re going for the expensive trinkets already, are you, sprout?” he teased, and when the baby babbled happily at him, he lifted her out of Wendy’s arms and nestled her comfortably against his chest.
“Now if that isn’t a sight,” Tessa murmured. She jumped up. “Come upstairs, Wendy. I’ve got a dress I’d like you to see. It’s a sample, because I can’t make up my mind about putting it into production, but I think...”
What was it Mack had said earlier, about not trying to predict what Tessa might do? Obviously clothes were at the center of the woman’s existence – and apparently for good reason – but shouldn’t she at least have wanted to hold the baby? If Elinor had been right...
Can’t you even make up your mind, Miller? Wendy asked herself irritably. Just a few minutes ago she’d been hoping Tessa didn’t want Rory, but now, when the woman took no particular interest in the baby, Wendy was reacting as if she’d been personally insulted.
By the time she came downstairs again, wearing Tessa’s creation – it really was a lovely thing, a softly styled shirt-dress in jade green, and Tessa had insisted on making it a Christmas gift – the family was gathered in the hallway, and the cars were at the door. Mack was zipping Rory into the pink snowsuit they’d bought this afternoon, and he had his hands full, as the baby had different ideas.
Tessa laughed at the picture, and then sobered. “You can’t mean you’re going to take her to church, Mack.”
“Why not? It’s a family tradition, and she’s a member of the family. And this is the children’s service, after all.”
“But it’s not intended for babies, surely. Why not let the nurses take care of her for a couple of hours? It’s what they’re trained for.”
Mack looked at Wendy, and his eyebrows lifted a millimeter. “I think the answer to the question you asked this afternoon is no,” he murmured.
Obviously he didn’t think Tessa was a candidate to be Rory’s mother; Wendy was so confused she didn’t know what to think.
The church was an enormous one, but the service was warm and personal, with all the children sitting on the altar carpet while the pastor retold the simple story of another, very special child. Rory didn’t grow impatient till the last quarter hour, but then she made no secret of her annoyance. After she’d been passed back and forth from Mack to Wendy a couple of times with no noticeable improvement in her mood, Mack leaned over to whisper, “Let’s just bundle her up and walk home.”
A long walk in the cold was very nearly the least inviting thing Wendy could think of, but with the holiday, it might be the only chance she had to talk to Mack. The way Tessa’s eyebrows lifted as if to say, I told you not to bring her, was the final confirmation.
It had started to snow again while they were in church, and huge lacy flakes drifted lazily down from a quiet sky. “A real Christmas snow,” Mack said as he arranged Rory over one shoulder and offered his other arm to Wendy.
The sidewalks were still clear, but the night sounds were muted. They might have been alone in a frozen world, but for an occasional distant voice calling “Merry Christmas,” and the faint sound of bells from a faraway church tower. Rory put her head down against Mack’s shoulder and was still.
Wendy tried to steel herself, but before she could do more than clear her throat a couple of times, Mack said, “You want to know why I didn’t buy you a round-trip ticket.”
“No. Well, yes, I do. But what I really want to know is what’s going to happen to Rory.” The heels of her shoes were beating out an agitated rhythm on the concrete. “I heard you tell your mother you were working on it – settling Rory’s future, I suppose. But if Tessa isn’t interested...”
“She’s not exactly the maternal sort,” he agreed. “Don’t get me wrong, I like Tessa a great deal.”
Wendy looked up at him with pain in her eyes. A huge snowflake had caught in his lashes; Wendy found herself wanting to brush it away. She clenched her hands together instead and bit her lip. She was in no position to issue orders, or to question his actions. If she kept this up, she was likely to find herself on the next plane to Phoenix, Christmas Eve or not.
But even if he became angry with her, Wendy couldn’t just let it rest, not with Rory’s future at stake. “Don’t you see, Mack? If Tessa and John don’t take her, we’re back to square one with the same problem. What’s going to happen to Rory?”
She thought for a long moment that he wasn’t going to answer at all. Then he said, very quietly, “I’m going to keep her myself. I’ll adopt her, and raise her as my own.”
Wendy’s eyes widened in momentary shock. The announcement made sense, of course; Mack was too attached to the baby not to have thought of it. And it wasn’t in his nature to ignore a child in need; he couldn’t turn his back on Rory. Still, as a solution to Rory’s problems, it wasn’t much of an improvement.
“That’s charming,” Wendy said. “But have you considered the practical problems of being a single parent? Believe me, I know what I’m talking about. What are you going to do when business takes you out of town? Pop the baby in your briefcase and carry her along? Or do you mean you’ll just hire nurses, too?”
“I don’t have to travel much anymore. At any rate, I don’t intend to be a single parent.”
Of course. That made perfect sense. If he was married, Rory would have the best of all worlds –a financial security, emotional stability, two parents to love and care for her.
Mack had found the ideal solution – the only solution – and Wendy told herself she ought to be adult enough to admit it and be happy for Rory.
But there was a knot in the bottom of her stomach, a just-short-of-sick feeling that made her head swim and her ears buzz. Who would that second parent be? Perhaps the woman with the syrupy voice who had left the message on his answering machine? Would she – could she – truly take Rory as her own child? No matter how much she cared about Mack, it would be a shock to find out at this stage that she was getting not only a husband but an instant family. And if she didn’t love Rory…
The fact that Wendy had taken an instant dislike to her voice had nothing to do with it. The woman might be perfectly nice.
The knot in her stomach clenched tighter, but finally she forced herself to nod. “Rory needs to be part of a real family.” She hardly recognized her own voice.
It was like tearing out a piece of her heart to finally relinquish the child she had cared for so deeply. And that was what she was doing; she wouldn’t even ask for the right to visit Rory now.
It would have been different if the child was to stay on with the Burgesses, for then there could have been a spot in her life for Wendy as a kind of surrogate mother. But with Mack’s solution, the child would have two parents and a stable family; it would be better to let her grow up unconfused by an extra person darting in and out of her life at random intervals.
Mack shifted the baby in his arms in order to unlock the gates. Rory whimpered sleepily and settled down once more as they strolled up the driveway.
The baby was perfectly content with him. She had been almost from the beginning, as if she had instinctively known she could trust this man to watch out for her. In a little time she would probably even forget Wendy, the funny lady with the silly cough.
“I ought to have thought of it myself,” Wendy said. Her voice was high and a little shrill. “The idea of... marriage, I mean.” Why should it be so difficult to say the word? Why should it hurt so badly? She had already begun the difficult process of giving Rory up.
“These are unusual circumstances,” he agreed soberly. “In the normal course of things, I don’t suppose you’d have given the idea of marrying me a moment’s consideration. But as it is... Well, I’m glad to have it settled.”
The pavement under Wendy’s feet slowly began to sink and twist like quicksand pulling her down.
She hadn’t heard the quiet purr of the long dark car which cruised up the driveway and idled to a stop right behind them. She didn’t even realize the car was there until Elinor spoke from the open window. “I couldn’t help hearing. It is settled, then?” she said sharply.
Wendy opened her mouth, but the only sound she could make was a feeble croak. Mack said nothing at all.
Elinor looked from one of them to the other, and whatever she saw in their faces seemed to satisfy her, for she turned to Wendy and held out both hands, heedless of their twisted shape and of the pain she would suffer in the embrace she invited. “Oh, my dear,” she said. “How wonderful it will be to have you as my daughter!”
CHAPTER SEVEN
Wendy would never understand how she made it up the steps to the front door. Her head was spinning so wildly that she could hardly see which direction to go. She had barely enough presence of mind to thank heaven that she wasn’t holding Rory right then – she’d have probably let the child slide right through her hands.
The etiquette rule she had learned in the past twenty-four hours about talking where staff might overhear went straight out the window. The butler held the door for them, and the moment she was inside, Wendy turned on Mack.
“Me?” she hissed. “You meant you wanted to marry me?”
“I don’t see why you’re so surprised. You said yourself getting married was an obvious answer.”
“That was before I realized you were talking about me!”
“It’s the only sensible solution I’ve found. My mother would not lightly give that child up to just anyone – but even she admits that you’ve got a very special place in Rory’s heart.” He studied her over the baby’s fur-covered head. “Besides, the whole thing was your idea, really.”
Wendy’s jaw dropped. “What in heaven’s name are you talking about?”
“You’re the one who first suggested I keep Rory myself, and you’ve spent the entire past week looking for ways to stay involved in her life.”
“That’s why you didn’t buy me a round-trip ticket?”
“Not exactly. I thought leaving the arrangements open would be sensible, since no one knew how Rory would react to all the changes. You must admit, however, that my solution is neater than yours. It’s a whole lot easier to move you to Chicago than the entire Burgess household to Phoenix.”
Wendy couldn’t deny that, and yet it was such a very efficient, businesslike conclusion that it left a sour taste in her mouth. “I’m not quite like the upstairs maid,” she said finally. “You can’t just hire me to fill a gap in your staff!”
His voice was perfectly level. “Nobody’s asking you to be a family retainer, Wendy.”
She felt a bit ashamed of herself. Elinor had greeted the news with all the bubbly enthusiasm any prospective daughter-in-law could wish, far more than the mild interest she might have felt at the hiring of a mere employee. Considering the circumstances, it was a better reception than Wendy would have dared hope for – if she’d ever given the possibility a moment’s consideration, which of course she hadn’t.
She sighed. She was going around in circles again. This entire idea was the wackiest thing she’d ever heard of. At least, thank heaven, the rest of the family hadn’t arrived in time to overhear; only Elinor and Samuel had been riding in the first car, so there was a little time.
As Wendy and Mack came in, two housemen had gone down the steps to help Elinor out of the car, and they were bringing the wheelchair up the ramp at the side of the entrance. The other car was already in sight, just down the driveway. In a couple of minutes, all the Burgesses would be gathered once more, and once the news was out, sober consideration would be impossible. The sooner a halt was called to this nonsense, the better.
“You’ll have to tell your parents...” Wendy stopped abruptly. Perhaps she shouldn’t burn bridges till she’d had a chance to look around for alternate routes. “Tell them that I’m thinking about it.” Her voice was unsteady. “And ask Elinor not to make any announcements till I’ve thought. Please, Mack.”
“I didn’t mean her to hear, you know.”
Wendy nodded. “I understand. If I thought you’d done that on purpose...” She wasn’t looking at Mack, but at the bundle in his arms. Rory was starting to stir and whimper fretfully. “She’s too warm, and it’s past her bedtime. I’ll take her up to the nursery.”
“Running away?” Mack asked softly.
She took the baby and unzipped the snowsuit. “Maybe I am. But don’t forget you’ve had a chance to think about this. I haven’t.”
“What’s to think about? It’s a partnership, for Rory’s sake. That’s all.”
She had climbed half a dozen steps when Mack called her name, and she turned to look down at him. He was standing in the curve of the stairway, one hand on the newel post. “You’re a good sport,” he said.
She looked down into his eyes for a long moment before she turned and started up the stairs. Her knees were shaking just a little, and she knew he stood there silently and watched her till she reached the upstairs hall.
Flowery words would have rung false; she knew that trying to pretend this was a romantic match would only make everyone uncomfortable. And yet – was it so silly to wish that there was something more he liked about her than just being a good sport?
But at least that compliment had come from his heart.
The nursery was dim and warm and quiet, an island of security. Not even the nurses were in evidence as she extracted Rory from the furry snowsuit, changed her diaper and dressed her in one of her old familiar sleepers. The child’s eyelids were already heavy, but Wendy rocked her for a little while anyway and sang to her.
If she accepted Mack’s offer... She couldn’t bring herself to call it a proposal, for it was really nothing of the sort. But whatever name they gave the arrangement was beside the point.
If Wendy agreed to his plan, she could spend the rest of her life with Rory. She could be the mother she had longed to be – and she could do so without depriving the child of anything else which was her right. Rory would have her grandparents, her name, her inheritance – and the security of two parents who loved her above all else. Even if her family wasn’t exactly like every other child’s, at least it would be close enough not to need explanation. Mack was absolutely correct; this was the best solution.
And yet, to marry a man she scarcely knew, to commit herself for a lifetime...
A partnership, he had called it. A partnership for Rory’s sake. Hardly a marriage at all, just a legal maneuver. If Wendy could reason it out that way, as Mack so obviously had...
It wasn’t as if she was in love with anyone. In the past few months, since Rory had moved into the center of her life, there hadn’t been time to date. She’d hardly had a spare moment to think about the gaps in her social life – except to laugh about the situation once in a while.
And even before that, in the years when she’d had only herself to think about, she’d never run across a man she couldn’t
live without. Certainly there had never been anyone for whom she would have given up Rory, and she didn’t expect there would ever be. It seemed logical that if there was a perfect man for her, she’d have found him before now. She was twenty-eight, after all.
So it wasn’t as if Mack was asking her to give up anything important by marrying him. Quite the contrary, really. She’d have the same joys and benefits as if she’d never made that telephone call – without the twin worries of financial hardship and single-parent exhaustion.
And yet...
She heard the sound of the dinner gong, faint and far away, and reluctantly she put Rory down in the lace-draped crib, turned on the intercom which would summon a nurse if the baby cried, and tiptoed to the door.
One of the nurses was just coming in. “Mrs. Burgess sent me up,” she said.
So Wendy could join her new family at dinner; that was obviously what Elinor was thinking. Wendy hoped that Mack had managed to speak to his mother before the rest of the family arrived. If he hadn’t...
Entering the drawing room was like facing a gauntlet, for all the Burgesses were already there waiting for her. But there was none of the curiosity she had half-expected and no questions, only friendly faces.
But Wendy’s perceptions seemed suddenly much sharper than usual. Colors were brighter, noises louder. Everything was larger than life. Earlier this evening she had been only a guest in this house, watching the action as if it were a play and she simply a spectator. Now she hovered at the edge of the curtain, trying to decide whether to take up the cue she had been given. And tomorrow...would she walk out on the stage, or leave the theater?
Mack stayed at a distance for most of the evening. He was not deliberately avoiding her, Wendy was certain. But the seating arrangement at the dining room table placed them almost as far apart as they could be, and after dinner he was absorbed in a conversation with John at the far end of the room, while she was talking to Tessa by the fire. Even without looking around for him, she knew where he was – she seemed to have developed radar.
The Only Solution Page 10
