Cheyenne sighed, and Jason saw the relief in her eyes. “You said you would keep what I tell you in confidence?”
“Absolutely.”
“Good. I appreciate that. How about things other than what I tell you?”
“I don’t understand.”
“Do you keep other stuff in confidence, too?”
Jason smiled a little, realizing now what she was referring to. “Yes, of course. No one will know you’re receiving spankings other than you, me, and Dan. I set it up with Dan so that everyone at work thinks I’m a new client and I’ve requested you do the artwork. He’s told everyone it’s a big, very involved project, so you’ll be working mostly on that project only, although you will be doing some other work, as well, and you’re going to work at home for the next four weeks, at least, so you can spread things out and work on it anytime you want.”
“Dan’s already arranged it?” she asked, surprised.
“Yes. Discretion is always very important to me, and I didn’t want anyone wondering what was going on or who I am. The actual plan was Dan’s, but he insists it will work fine, so just remember that when we go to the office, and act accordingly.”
She nodded in agreement. “Thanks.”
“For what?”
“For the cover-up for work. I was afraid everyone would know what was going on and I’d never be able to show my face there again.”
“That’s not the way I work, Cheyenne. I try to encourage people, not make them feel uneasy.”
He could tell she was thinking, and was quiet. “So if I tell you something, you won’t use it against me, really?”
Jason’s eyebrows furrowed together, trying to understand what she could be thinking of. “What do you mean by use it against you?” He watched her face closely. “If you tell me something you did that you know you shouldn’t have, something we’ve been working on, I’ll use it to give you a spanking, but other than that, I can’t think of anything you could consider using against you.”
“No, not like that,” she said. “You said you keep everything I say confidential?”
“Without exception,” he assured her, “unless you’re going to confess to me that you’re a serial killer or something like that,” he added, with a grin.
“No, no,” she replied. “I may be a bad person, but nothing like that—nothing illegal.”
“That’s good to know, but,” he suddenly got very serious, “you’re not a bad person, and I don’t want to hear you even suggest that you may be, ever again. Okay?”
She looked at him surprised. “How can you say I’m not a bad person? You’ve whaled on me three times today. I’m certainly no gem.”
“Stop right there,” he said, cutting her off. “I don’t want to hear one more negative word about yourself, young lady. You are a wonderful person, with a lot of good things going for you. You’re just having a little trouble getting control of some parts of your life right now.”
“Do you always sugarcoat things like that?”
“Are you always this hard on yourself?”
“I’m not being hard on myself; I’m just finally seeing me for what I really am, which is a real bit—”
“Watch it,” he warned. “Not only would that language not be allowed, but I just told you not to put yourself down.”
She looked at him, opened her mouth, shut it, looked away while obviously thinking, and looked at him again. “Can I say that word just once, please, without getting in trouble?”
“Why?” Jason was puzzled by her request.
“I want to tell you about one thing I’m feeling right now, what you said you want to know about, but I can’t without saying that word.”
Jason considered her request, then studied her momentarily before answering. “This one time you may use that one word, if you’re going to share with me some of what you’re feeling.”
“Thank you.” Then she sighed, thought a moment, he assumed collecting her thoughts before she began to speak. “You said anything I say will stay between you and me; right?” When he nodded she continued. “Good. What I’m feeling is ashamed and embarrassed. I fu—I screwed my life up, and I didn’t even realize it. Now I see it. When I first heard that Dan brought you in and why, I was angry. No, I was mad. I was da—I was really mad, and I wanted to tell him what he could do with his program. But then when he gave me the ultimatum, I had to think about it. Then you talked to me last night, being totally honest, which is what I needed and what I want, and I finally looked at my life for what it is. I’ve been a real bitch. I don’t know any other way you could describe it. I want what I want and I want it now. I’ve been a bitch to get along with, and you’re right about my language. It’s gotten steadily worse and I hadn’t even noticed it.”
“Don’t be too hard on yourself.”
“No, that’s the thing; I’m not being too hard on myself. I’m just finally being honest. I see me now for who I am, and I’m not impressed. I’m embarrassed. I’m embarrassed about the way I am, and I’m embarrassed that it got so bad that Dan set this up and I have to finish the program or be fired, and I’m embarrassed that I’m being, that you’re—you know.”
“You’re embarrassed that you’re getting your butt spanked every time you act like a bitch?” Jason had to smile at the shock on her face, but he continued. “If you’re ready to be honest and look at things as they really are, then isn’t that what’s happening? You’re getting your butt spanked every time you act like a bitch, aren’t you?” He watched her blush as she nodded her head. “I don’t much like that word and see no reason to have to use it on a regular basis, but what you mean by it is when you do things you know you shouldn’t do, where your own behavior embarrasses you. Every time you do something like that, you’re getting your butt spanked. If you’re ready to be honest about things, that’s good. In fact, that's real good. From now on, then, we’re going to be frank about it. No more hiding, being afraid to say the word. Every time you do or say something you know you shouldn’t, you’ll get spanked. To make sure you understand, what will I do if you have a temper tantrum and cuss someone out?”
Her face was as red as he’d seen it and she was shaking her head no, but he didn’t let up. “Cheyenne?” He knew she heard the warning in his voice. He waited a second and tried again. “Last chance. What will I do if you have a temper tantrum and cuss someone out?”
Jason watched her face, and could tell she was aware of what she had to say, and could see how hard it was for her. She didn't want to do it, and she was being stubborn, which was part of her problem. In his opinion, she needed to realize she sometimes had to do things she didn't want to do, and decided this was a good place to start. He didn't let up, but waited. Finally, she quietly said, “You’ll sp… sp… spank me.”
He took her in his arms and said, “That’s my girl.” Holding her, rubbing her back, he asked, “Now, why was that so hard for you?”
She was fighting hard to keep the tears at bay as she said, “Because it’s embarrassing.”
“What part is so embarrassing to you?”
“The fact that I need it. I’m an adult. The fact that I need to have someone actually spank me to get me to act like an adult is embarrassing.”
Jason was starting to understand more about this little beauty in his arms, and it was also becoming quite clear to him it was going to be very difficult to keep this on a professional level. “Cheyenne, don’t be embarrassed. Spanking is just the quickest way I’ve found to help people deal with their problems.”
“But it’s how you correct children, when they do childish things. I’m an adult, I shouldn’t need to be corrected like a child. I should be past that.”
“Nonsense,” he quickly said. “There was nothing childish about any of the spankings you got. The best way to change a habit or behavior is with consequences when you slip up. There are all sorts of consequences you can use, but I’ve found that spanking works better than anything else I’ve tried. Like I said, it’s q
uick, it’s over with, but it leaves an unpleasant reminder to watch your behavior. But there is nothing childish about my spankings.”
“No kidding,” she murmured.
He smiled, but continued. “It only works, though, if you want to change. You have now seen the need for change, which is a big step, and have agreed to accept help to achieve that, which is another big step. There should be absolutely nothing embarrassing about taking those steps. That’s something you should be proud about and something I'm definitely proud that you've been able to accomplish.”
Jason could tell Cheyenne was listening carefully to what he was telling her, and it was helping to relax her, and her anxieties. He also noted that the gentle hand rubbing her back and the strong arms wrapped around her were very soothing, as well. He made another mental note of that.
Jason steered them both toward safer activities. She made dinner while he made some notes, keeping an ear open for any sounds of temper tantrums in the making. They enjoyed dinner and shared the dishwashing chore, then went to watch a little television. Both were ready for some simple activity, and neither said too much.
As it grew later, he talked to her a little more, reiterating that he was proud of her. He was glad to see she was willing to talk to him a little now. Finally, though, he was ready to call it a day. “I think we’ve done enough for the first day, Cheyenne. We’ve made a great deal of progress. I’m not sure you can see it yet, but trust me, this was a very good day, although I’m not sure your bottom would agree.”
Glad to see her smile, along with her ever-present blush reappearing, he added, “I’ll be here at 8:20 or 8:25 tomorrow morning, and we’re going to the office to pick up some work for you to do here. It will be in Dan’s office, and everyone thinks we’re meeting with him about the project you’re working on at home for me, so remember that when you talk to anyone. Be sure you’re ready on time so we don’t have to start tomorrow off with a spanking, okay?”
“8:20, got it,” she said. “See you then.”
“Lock your door after I leave,” Jason reminded her as he left.
Cheyenne smiled as she watched him leave. That was the same thing he’d told her last night when he left. What was that all about, she wondered. Then she sat down on the couch as she went over the day in her mind. She thought about her spankings, and how terribly much they hurt and how she wanted them to end, but she also thought about how it felt to be in his arms afterward, and how much she didn’t want that to end.
She also wondered about her feelings for him. She was usually very skeptical of people she just met, so why did she feel so comfortable with him? She trusted him already, which was very unlike her. Probably because he was being honest with her about everything. The more she thought about him, the more she realized there were a lot of things she liked about him. She immediately told herself not to even think like that. She was sure he was just doing his job and had no feelings for her beyond that.
Jason was doing a great deal of thinking, as well, as he drove the short distance to his condo. He was just as confused about his feelings as she was about hers, but neither of them had any idea the other felt as they did. He let himself into the condo, took a shower, and went to bed, still deep in thought.
Chapter 4
Cheyenne’s alarm went off Wednesday morning at 7:00 a.m. She hit the snooze alarm, rolled over, and went back to sleep. In her half awake state, her mind wandered to Jason, and his muscular body and quick smile. Then she thought about how good it felt when he held her in his arms. She was dreaming of sitting on his lap, cradled in his arms, when her alarm went off again. She didn’t want that wonderful dream to end, so she reached over and hit the snooze button again.
Her dream drifted to the reason she was sitting on his lap, and just as her alarm went off she remembered the spankings. Then she remembered he was coming at 8:20 and warned her she better be ready, or else. She immediately jumped out of bed and hurried to take her shower. She wanted to avoid as many of his “or else” events as possible. They hurt.
Cheyenne hurried through her shower and got dressed quickly. She was just finishing her makeup when she heard her doorbell. She looked at the clock and smiled. 8:20 exactly. She hurried to the door and opened it, smiling at Jason.
Jason was glad she was ready, and returned her smile. “Good morning, Cheyenne,” he greeted.
“Good morning,” she said, motioning for him to come in. “Coffee?”
“No, thank you, I had breakfast,” he replied. “Have you eaten?”
“I don’t usually have anything other than coffee, and I’ve had a cup already. I’ll take a cup along to drink on the way.”
“You don’t eat breakfast?”
“Not usually, no.”
“Why not?”
“Who has time to fix breakfast and eat before they leave?”
His smile disappeared momentarily. “I do. Don’t you get hungry before lunch?”
“Not after a little while. You get used to it,” she assured him.
“But you do better at work if you eat breakfast. I’m sure you’ve heard those reports.”
“Yeah, but I’ve also had Dan chew my ass out enough times for being late that I don’t even try to eat anything first.”
Jason had a frown on his face quickly. “Watch your language, Cheyenne. I don’t want to start our day that way.” He saw the sudden anger in her eyes, and trying to avoid an outburst, reached over and gently rubbed her shoulders. To his relief, he watched the anger soften, then a smile slowly appeared on her face.
“Sorry, Jason, and thank you.” That earned her a big smile from Jason, which made her morning. “You really are trying to help, aren’t you?”
“I told you yesterday, Cheyenne, I’d rather guide you to success than guide you over my knee.” He smiled, enjoying the smile on her face now. That was a good start to his day. “Get your coffee and let’s go,” he told her. “I’ll drive.”
“I can drive.”
“No offense, but I’ve folded myself into your car already. I fit better in mine.”
She laughed a bit, remembering how cramped he was yesterday in her car. “You do have a point,” she admitted. She grabbed her purse and coffee and hurried out the door, checking to be sure the door was locked.
Jason helped her into his car, and as they went to her office they went over the story they were telling her coworkers. Once they had reviewed that, he tackled another subject. “Now, Cheyenne, I want to remind you of what I expect while we’re at your office today.”
“Okay,” she said, a bit concerned.
“I’m supposed to be a client with a big project, so I expect you to act accordingly.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, act as if you’re working with a big client. Be courteous to people, and watch your language. I’ll expect you to be nicer to Jenna while we’re waiting to see Dan.”
“Nicer to Jenna?”
“Dan’s secretary.”
Cheyenne looked confused. “I wasn’t rude to her.”
“Other than to tell her to tell Dan we were there, you ignored her.”
“I didn’t have anything else to say to her, and I wasn’t in a real good mood.”
“I understand that, but if you want to keep your job, you have to show Dan you can treat people with respect. Being short with her and then ignoring her is not treating her with respect.”
Jason parked his car and turned to look at Cheyenne. “Don’t get upset with me, but I’m trying to be fair to you here. Do we need to go over proper etiquette in the workplace?”
She narrowed her eyes as she looked at him, but didn’t say anything. She listened when he started speaking again. “I’ve assumed that you just haven’t been minding your manners at work, for whatever reason. I didn’t know if you don’t care for the people you work with, or if you get frustrated with some of the clients you’ve worked with, or what the problem was, but I assumed you knew what proper protocol is. Maybe what you need is
for us to sit down and have a long talk about what’s acceptable behavior, or how a professional should act. Dan and I are expecting you to act a certain way, and maybe I need to explain what that certain way consists of.”
“That would make me a pretty horrible person if I didn’t know what’s expected of me, wouldn’t it?”
Although she said that statement with a bit of an attitude, something about her eyes looked very vulnerable to Jason. He thought a moment before answering. “No, it wouldn’t, Cheyenne. In my mind, it would mean you’re a confused person who’s been trying to do the best you can, but it's kind of like feeling your way through a dark basement.”
She harrumphed, but Jason noticed she didn’t deny it. Feeling like he’d just made a huge breakthrough, he made a suggestion. “Cheyenne, I have an idea. We’ll talk about it when we get home, but in the meantime, let’s try to keep it quick in here. Let’s just go in, talk to Dan and get some work he wants you to work on, and we’ll leave. Be polite to people we run into. If they say hello, return their hello with a smile. Let me take the lead here, and watch and listen. We’ll talk more when we get home.”
Cheyenne looked at him, confused, but he quickly got out of the car, and before she knew it, he was at her side of the car, opening the door for her. She didn’t know what his idea was, but he sure seemed anxious to get back home, and that sounded good to her, as well. She was terrified she’d do or say the wrong thing in here and find herself in trouble with Jason again.
She stepped out of the car and allowed him to lead her to the door with a gentle hand on her back. She decided she’d let him lead as much as possible, and maybe she could get back home without getting into too much trouble.
He opened the door for her and she smiled at him and said, “Thank you.”
Cheyenne and Jason (Last Chance Program Book 1) Page 5
