* * * *
Hunter and I sat on the couch later that night. It felt so natural.
“One time Keith came in to find we had totally destroyed the kitchen. I had been so determined to make the perfect cake for him for his birthday.”
I recalled the mess Griffin and I had created. Hunter didn’t say a word during the story, but he held my hand. I looked over at him and saw contentment in his eyes. His thumb brushed against mine. My stomach fluttered.
“I am glad you had him.”
Hunter turned to me but he seemed farther away than he had all night. I wondered about his parents. Why would Damien claim him as an adoptive son? What about his real parents? Hunter looked at me with a new heat.
He moved forward and pressed his hand against my chest. I was wearing a low cut top and his palm rested against the skin above my heart. His heat caused it to come alive. My nerves tingled. I breathed hard. I swallowed, moving my glance from his heart only to wandered back up.
“It is strange, it’s like I can feel your sorrow here,” he looked down to my heart, then back up. “And yet I feel like you’re so far away.”
I swallowed hard. We didn’t speak for the rest of the night. We stayed in each other’s company until my yawns were impossible to ignore. Hunter walked me to the guest room. I thought for sure he was going to kiss me like he had before. I wanted him to. Instead he pressed his lips against my cheek and bid me a goodnight.
I woke up the next morning thinking about all the stupid, silly little things that he did for me. The small details that were wiggling their way into my heart. He was quietly considerate. The first day that I was there, he made sure to leave out the TV controllers for me in the order I needed to use them. He was out training with the twins. The third day I was there alone, Jen unexpectedly showed up, at Hunter’s request, I was sure.
There were times when he left me alone and I was tempted to go into his room and snoop around. I wanted his trust more than anything. I wouldn’t risk the growing trust we had by snooping in his room.
Each night we would continue our dinners. I would tell him more about different adventures I went on when I was a kid. I managed to pull out some stories from him, but he still seemed hesitant. He had yet to make a repeat performance of his mega-watt smile. And I had yet to hear him laugh.
My new mission. Make him laugh.
While I was still trying to get a laugh from him, I found it a worthy endeavor in itself. I managed to get a few more smiles. Still not like the one from before, though. I wasn’t sure if that was a fluke…
But it was finally the full moon. I wanted to ask if he would still be willing to take me on a run with him.
I was also trying to work up the courage to ask if I could see him in his wolf form. Not like shifting was strange to me, but I had never seen him in wolf form.
I was strangely eager. My wolf was on the edge.
“So it’s the full moon…”
I waited for Hunter to pick up the cue. He wasn’t a huge talker. I’d be a liar if I didn’t say that didn’t somewhat peeve me. I liked to talk, and I wanted him to interact with me. To share with me. I knew that everyone expressed themselves differently, but I still wanted to have more than one-word responses from him.
“Yes,” he answered with his eyebrows raised.
My nose scrunched up on its own.
“You’re annoyed with me,” Hunter observed.
“Yes,” I answered, trying to play his game. But I was seconds from splitting at the seams to continue. I think he knew it too, because a smug look spread across his face. I let out a mock growl and continued forward.
“You said a while back that maybe you would take me running with you on the full moon. I am feeling all twitchy. Do you think we could still do that?”
It felt so strange saying that I felt antsy for a run. Normally I didn’t like running. It really wasn’t on the list of things I liked to do. Not even on the fake list of things I liked to do.
“We can.”
I think my wolf wanted to howl with delight. I felt a sense of relief. The rest of the day Hunter stayed near the house. I felt like there was something the matter with him. I could tell by his posture he was more on edge than he had been since we first arrived.
“Hunter?”
I found him outside sitting on the small porch built off the front of the house. His eyes were shut and his jaw clenched, making the muscle dance. His eyes opened and I recognized the glint of the wolf.
“Mate.”
His voice deepened.
“What’s wrong?” I whispered moving closer, feeling an undeniable need to touch him.
I moved on instinct. He needed this. When my hand made contact with his skin, all this warmth flooded into me. I felt my body wanting to draw closer. I looked into his eyes and wasn’t sure if I was looking at wolf or if I was looking at Hunter.
I didn’t care, everything in me screamed for him. To be closer. To press my lips against his. I remembered our passionate kiss in Damien’s house. It was the last time we had been so intimate and I missed it. I missed the feel of him, the press of his body, the closeness we had shared.
“Nothing.”
Hunter looked away from me. I wanted to push him, but I trusted he would tell me when he was ready. Evening was drawing near and I was getting nervous. We sat outside for a while longer until I couldn’t take it. I stood up and started pacing. I was passing Hunter for probably the tenth time when he grabbed my hand.
“I’ll keep you safe.”
I looked down at him, my eyebrows furrowed. I didn’t understand why he said that. I wasn’t nervous that someone in his pack would attack me. I was restless. I had this jittery feeling through my whole body. I could feel adrenaline surge.
“Come, we need to change.”
Hunter pulled me back into the house. He led me back to my room and left me alone there. I looked down at my jeans. Right, can’t run in jeans.
Run.
A sense of bliss slipped over me. That is what I wanted. What I needed. I could hear my wolf now. She was the one causing my jitters. She wanted out. She needed the forest and to run with her mate. I was elated for a moment.
I sat down on my bed looking at my hands. Even if I knew I was half-human, I knew my chances of shifting were slim. There were other half wolves, half humans out there but they were rare, and it was even rarer to see them shift. But it was what I wanted tonight. I wanted to run with Hunter as a wolf, not as…this.
I could feel my wolf, but she was trapped. She would never have freedom. The freedom we both craved. And not only for her, but for Hunter too. His wolf would always only have half a mate. I would never be what they needed.
“We can feel her,” Hunter voice brought me from my thoughts.
I looked up at him. He was wearing loose gym shorts and a gray t-shirt. I was starting to feel ashamed. I knew I couldn’t control my heritage but it felt wrong that he was dragged into this life with me. Hunter placed his hand on my cheek, and I leaned into his touch.
“The creator has a sick sense of humor.”
Hunter started searching me as he spoke.
“To pair me and you together. Me, more wolf than man, and you more human than wolf. I want to believe that the creator knew we would find our missing part in each other. Peace we need. Someday I hope you find that peace within me. And I hope one day you will realize I will care for you as you are.”
Hunter leaned in close and brushed his lips against mine. It wasn’t a moment of unadulterated passion, it was a simple gesture. One that meant more to me than he could have imagined. His gentleness caused me to move forward a little. I needed to touch him, just as he needed me. I let my hand drag across his scruff, and shivered in delight at the light groan that slipped from him. He pulled away before we could get carried away and looked at me.
“I will protect you.”
With that Hunter left and I finished getting dressed. I thought about what he said. It soured my stomach
knowing that I was lying to him. That I would be lying to him for the rest of my life.
I wasn’t sure I could do that.
****
Hunter and I walked to the pack meeting, with him practically on top of me. He was rarely ever more than five inches from me, which I appreciated. It made me feel safe. But we still hadn’t done the ritual. We weren’t mated-mated.
And wolves were so much closer to the surface on full moons.
Damien watched us as we came into the clearing, and I noticed the subtle smile spreading across his lips. For some reason I didn’t like the look in his eye. It was too calculated. I wanted to know what he was thinking. My view of him was cut off when Jude came up to us.
“Are you running with us tonight, Colette?” Jude asked.
“I’m running with her. We’ll not be running the same trail as the pack, though,” Hunter answered and moved just a fraction closer.
I could feel the heat of his body on my chilled skin. The night wasn’t quite cold, but it was getting chillier. I had decided to wear my old soccer shorts and an old shirt.
I wasn’t dressed to impress, I was dressed to run. I was wearing tennis shoes but I knew that I would take them off as soon as we started. I wanted to feel the earth beneath my feet. I couldn’t shake the need to feel it all around me. I knew it was her. I knew it was my wolf.
She wanted out.
Jude turned his sharp gaze back to me. Jude pressed his lips together. I wasn’t sure what he wanted. He practically bullied me into coming here in the first place.
I didn’t trust Jude. I wanted to resolve my feelings– to tell him, really. But I noticed the only person Hunter was close to was Jude. As if sensing my need for a friend, Jen appeared.
Jen took me into a hug, carrying me a few steps in her embrace. I knew it was intentional, so that we would be only a few feet from Hunter and Jude. If we weren’t quiet they would definitely hear us. But they were distracted by their own discussion.
“You came! So you are going to run with the pack? Can you shift? I didn’t think you could,” Jen asked.
She sounded worried at the last part in particular. I looked away from her. Would she hate me, too, if she knew what I really was? I wasn’t just half human, half were, but my other half might be actively stopping my wolf from fully emerging?
“Um, Hunter and I are going to run on a different trail together. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to shift,” I said.
I looked away from her, my eyes catching Hunter’s. His yellow eyes glowed in the night. I shivered under his scrutiny. It was a mixture of desire and wildness. An untamable heat shot right through my body like an electrified wire.
He looked at me and I felt powerful. I shouldn’t feel bad that I couldn’t shift. If this powerful wolf could look at me with untamed desire, and respect, I felt like nothing could touch me. I might not be able to shift, but I wasn’t helpless either. I still had better reflexes, senses, and overall I was stronger and faster than a human. I didn’t have to use magic to enhance any of my abilities because they came to me naturally. I was getting more excited to go on this run with Hunter, not just because of my wolf, but also because I wanted to run with him.
Damien called the pack’s attention and Jen left me to stand with her brothers. I looked for their parents but didn’t see them. I had met the happier, older couple a few times but I didn’t spot them in the crowd. I was about ask Hunter what was going on when he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me to the edges of the forming mass of weres.
Damien was the first to shift, he was a huge brown wolf, his coat a little shaggy. They were growing in their winter coats already. His eyes were yellow in his wolf form. I shivered violently. He was powerful. But something else in me stirred.
The second part of me demanded to be heard about his careful watch over me. Fear slipped into my blood, chilling it. The more I tried to ignore it, the harder it became to turn away. I didn’t like the uneasiness it made me feel. My glance kept darting as if I was waiting for something to come out of the woods and attack. I shouldn’t be afraid, I was safe. I was with my kind.
The wolves around me started to strip out of their clothing, unbashful about their nudity. When they started to shift the energy they released bled off into my skin and calmed my rising fear. Their shifts were flawless and fluid. The pack was a mixture of browns, light grays, and some red coated wolves. The twins and Jen were the only blonde wolves in the pack.
Damien turned and howled. The energy that was running through the pack was addictive. It flowed over my skin. It energized me to run with Hunter. I turned to him; he watched the pack, looking bored.
I suspected to see a longing, or even anger that he couldn’t join them. Then he looked over at me. He was sporting that contented smile of his that made my knees go a little weak.
I smiled back and we turned. I took off my shoes while Hunter watched me with one raised eyebrow. I gave him a huge smile and took off leaving him behind. I knew the lead wouldn’t last.
Hunter caught up with me and I noticed his feet, too, were bare. Though the ground wasn’t completely clear, it was obvious the trail was used frequently. Hunter and I kept good pace, not that we were running to get exercise. We were running for fun.
Farther into our run, I went off course. Hunter growled in my direction and I would reappear. When I disappeared too long, he came after me. I rustled some leaves, only to duck behind a thicket in the opposite direction, hoping to fake Hunter out, if only for a second. I waited as I watched him approach my trap. I moved as quietly as I could from behind him and slapped his ass.
I quickly fled. I couldn’t hear him coming after me. I was laughing too hard, anyways, to hear much of anything. But I was swept off my feet. I had my eyes shut the entire time. Suddenly I could feel a firm surface. It was supple, warm, and smooth. I opened my eyes to see Hunter underneath me.
“Ahh, my plan worked,” I joked.
“What was that?” he asked, watching me with a hint of mischief in his eyes.
“Got you beneath me.”
We paused a moment, letting those words hang. I started laughing, but it didn’t last long. He rolled us so I was under him.
“Now it’s my plan that worked!”
I looked at him under my lashes and felt a blush burn to the surface of my skin and then rush throughout my body.
“Oh yeah? What plan?” I whispered. I wanted to goad him.
“I got you beneath me,” he answered moving a little closer to me.
I met him half way, but he stopped suddenly. His eyes flashed. I knew I was no longer with a man, but a wolf. Hunter pulled in a long breath through his nose and anger filled his gaze. His jaw twitched.
“What’s a matter?” I asked trying to be quiet. I listened carefully.
“Warlock,” Hunter growled, his voice already so distorted that I wasn’t sure I was hearing him right. But my body reacted to his words reflexively. Icy fear ran through my blood, paralyzing any movements I might have made. I couldn’t seem to breathe properly. I looked to Hunter, wishing that he would tell me it something, anything else. New fears arose with old ones.
Before he could say another word, an explosion tore through the night. It came from the left, which was the direction the pack was headed on their run. Hunter turned to me then back at where his pack and the warlock would be.
“Go, you have to go help them,” I said. They needed him more than I did. I knew what I had to do. I wouldn’t be able to fight the warlocks, and I wasn’t stupid enough to think that I could. I would have to try to make it back to the house. But Hunter’s pack needed him more than I did right now.
Hunter looked at me for a moment and I could see that he was torn. He could no doubt smell the fear that was pouring off of me. We didn’t have time for him to worry about me though.
“Go, Hunter!”
He sprang into action, climbing off me and pulling me to my feet at once.
“Run as fast as you can to Dami
en’s house. Don’t stop. Don’t give up.”
I swallowed hard. My heart raced, and I knew that I needed to get back to the house. I needed to get as far from that monster out there as possible.
But even as that thought occurred, I realized that tonight running through the woods with Hunter had been the happiest I ever been. I didn’t want to lose this. I didn’t want to lose him. I didn’t want to be half witch, and if I could, I would destroy that half of myself. For a chance with him I would. If he I saw one glimmer of hatred in him toward that part of me, I vowed I would destroy that evil inside me.
I was about to run off full speed, but Hunter swung me around.
Hunter pulled me up for a wild kiss. I could feel desperation in his movements. He was scared for me, I wasn’t sure if he was scared for himself, but my fear was evident. He knew my past, he knew this would just bring up those memories. When he pulled away he pressed his forehead to mine.
“I will be back. I won’t leave you,” he whispered.
Before I could answer he was bolting off and shifting mid-run. He was so quick through the undergrowth that I couldn’t even make out his color in the night. Or see which direction he was going. I started to run back to the house.
I remained quiet as I went. Small explosions broke the night. Dark magic. I could hear the growls of the other wolves, then it was quiet. I felt uneasy moving at my pace, but instinct told me to be quiet. I skulked in the shadows as silently as I could.
I heard a branch snap. My head swiveled immediately looking for the source. My pounding heart would give me away. It pounded in my ears. I could hear nothing else. I closed my eyes and breathed in twice before scenting the air.
Two new scents. Two I had never come across before. One smelled like mildew, it was unpleasant, and smelled earthy. I tried to wait to hear them move again, but I heard nothing. I went to leave my hiding place behind a copse of trees when I sensed someone behind me. Before I could move the binding spell wrapped around me.
Hexed Hearts Page 19
