Jackson nodded and looked at me.
“He is one lucky wolf.”
“No, he really isn’t,” I answered feeling the hole in my heart grow. Jackson gave me a questioning look, but didn’t ask further. I felt the pain of last night and the pain of the knowledge of what was to come.
“What happened to Vance?”
“He tried to break into your room last night, so one of my wolves took care of him. I’m sorry that this happened. I don’t understand. Battle rights were outlawed decades ago, he had no claim over you, no matter if he fought or not,” Jackson growled. Battle rights were ancient history for most packs. I wondered why Vance thought he could still abide by them.
I didn’t ask. All I knew was that I was safe, and that was the most important thing. One of Jackson’s wolves came in and whispered in his ear. It was too quiet for me to hear.
Jackson lifted one eyebrow as the wolf shrugged his shoulder and walked out. When Jackson’s eyes met mine I felt dread return.
“Seems there are almost two full packs trying to break into my territory. Lupen and Lowe,” he watched me closely. I looked out the only window in the room as if I could see them rushing the grounds. I bit my lip, taking care not to bite the side that had a cut.
“Two lucky bastards then,” he said questioning.
“No, just a complicated past. Would you be willing to do me one more favor?” I couldn’t take my eyes off the forest bordering the grounds. My heart was going faster as if matching the pace of someone else. A longing to not ask, lingered. How easy it would be just to run to him. And how selfish.
“Anything. But before you ask, have you really thought this through? When night falls I promise I will not be a man on a mission. Right now my pack needs me. I will be the Alpha I need to be because that’s who I am. When night falls I will just be a wolf without a mate.”
I understood he’d be mourning, I would be too.
“I’m sure.”
****
Jackson gave me a three day head start. I had asked for a couple days, but I wasn’t even sure he would give me that. I packed up some clothes. Jackson offered me some money and I took Aradia’s diaries and Grimores. Part of me wanted to do the same as Jackson. Wanted to burn them. Instead I kept them. But a sick part of me wanted to know more about her. Either way they tucked inside my backpack with my clothes. I headed out on the first bus out of there.
I had to leave. I could feel him getting closer. Fear kept me from staying. I told Jackson I would wait until the morning but I needed all the time I could get.
I was doing what was best for all of us.
Griffin was holding onto me and I would never be his to hold again. And Hunter…
Hunter might never come to truly love me if he knew. Part of me was fighting against this decision. My wolf called out for him. I felt her pain, and leaving would be the hardest thing I had to do. And Griff? I knew if I didn’t take Hunter as my mate, I would only be a burden to him. I couldn’t do that someone I loved like a brother. I had my time with them and I was thankful for every moment. But Hunter didn’t want to be an Alpha and that is the future I saw for him if he stayed with me. I didn’t think that Damien would give up.
There was more to it though. I had accepted who I was. I didn’t want to hide half of myself. And I couldn’t stand him hating that half anymore.
And Griffin simply wasn’t mine to have. I was okay with that. I had fallen out of love with Griff those many months ago, when Hunter and I had first met and I realized that I had a place and that place wasn’t with Griff. Having felt that, I couldn’t put him in a position where he couldn’t be fully devoted to his own mate. Griff was loyal to a fault and I feared what he would sacrifice for me. I loved him too much to hurt him like that.
****
I did it. I found a wolf that is willing mate with me. I couldn’t be more excited. I had thought this day would never come, but this is a small sacrifice to pay for the reward I will reap. The curse we have been working to fulfill these long centuries will come to fruition in twenty-one short years.
The wolf is handsome, in that rugged way. His face is clean-shaven, unlike the others. His hair is a lighter brown then my own. His boyish charm adds to the youthfulness of his face. Goddess help me, he has dimples. I feel like a school girl once again, looking into those shining blue eyes. He is a wolf though. If I was taught anything, it’s that wolves are beneath us. Slaves to our desires and our will.
His name is Dominic. I refuse to fall in love with this man. I’m no fool. I know how the mate-bond works. I am witch, after all. In the end, he’ll only leave me. It saddens me that I’ll have to kill him once I am impregnated. It is for the best though. I can’t have him coming after the child once it is born. I must cultivate its mind so that it would know its place in the world. Under my command, and above all else, in favor of the witches and warlocks.
Next, I will force this mating.
The bus jostled and rattled me out of the pages of her diary. I needed a small break from her words.
I looked outside the window. It was funny how different the weather was only a few states over. It had been a rough couple of days in Montana. I had been living on the bus. I didn’t know any packs out this way. I figured I would be safe in this area. Next I would be to find a job and lay low. I knew that I would have to try to find a job that would be willing to pay under the table, which meant it would be a minimum wage job, if that. I would have to start building a new life for myself.
I turned my attention back to the pages of the dairy. I was filled with disgust but I couldn’t put it down. This, as much as I hated it, was part of my past. I had to know it. I have to undo the damage my mother has caused in whatever way I can.
I fear that I might have fallen in love with Dominic. He has a strange sense of humor, but his love for me is never ending. I try to remind myself that I am using him, that eventually he would find his mate and he leave me. I knew these things yet … I have fallen for him. He has shown me the love that was absent all my life. My mother has always told me that our cause was more important than anything. That it is bigger than her, bigger than me. She tried to find out the secret that would fulfill the ritual. But the Emery line kept it secret for such a long time. It makes no matter, now we know. It’s a pity that my mother had complications after my birth. She told me it was common in our family. Something magically happens that dries us up after our first child. It was our curse.
I don’t know why, but this has always been the case since the original curse. I think the Goddess is punishing us. But none of that matters anymore. I want Dominic. I wanted the life with him that he painted for us.
I will give up on the curse in order to have a life with him.
I am pregnant. I am thrilled to tell Dominic, I hope he is as excited as I am. This is a joyous day. This child of mine will know love and happiness. Nic and I will provide the best that we can for our baby girl. I know she is a girl. I cannot wait to see my little Aradia for the first time.
Dominic has betrayed me. Granted I lied to him from day one. I told him my name was Colette, and I even told him I was a light witch. I trusted him and he betrayed me. He broken into my diary and knows everything now. I have to remind myself of his betrayal, every moment. He is threatening to leave. I am in my last trimester now. How am I supposed to raise this child without him? How could he do this to me? I understand finally what my mother meant. Wolves cannot be trusted. They must be controlled, not loved. I will leave here as soon as the child is born. My child and I will leave this place and never return. My heart has grown cold, and my hatred is thriving. No amount of pretty words will save him. I will destroy Dominic. I will destroy them all.
I gave birth to my child. She was a girl as I predicted. It was a difficult birth, as I expected and I needed some time to recover after. That’s when that rat-bastard stole my child. I must get her back. The spell is useless without her. All that matters now is the spell. I need her blood. I will kill
Dominic for all that he has done, and the threat that he poses to my cause. These are my new goals. Soon, I will save my child, and together we will rise up and succeed in the good work my line started all those years ago.
I had to stop. Would the next entry be of my father’s murder? I wanted to feel sympathy for Aradia. She had lost a lot. I was torn between my parents. I knew neither intimately, I only knew them from the pages and stories. The Aradia from the mansion was not the mother I would have ever imagined. She felt distant to me even now. Maybe the love she once had for my father was enough to turn her back to good, but the heartbreak was returned her to that dark path. I was scared of what I would read.
I puffed my cheeks out and let out the air slowly. I leaned my head against the window. Aradia had been driven to the point of insanity because of the actions of my father. And he had felt betrayed by her lying to him for the time they were together. I didn’t think that either were right or wrong, but I couldn’t fault Aradia for falling in love.
I looked down at the Grimoire in my lap. I wondered if the answers that I needed to help the wolves and witches. Then again if this book ever ended up in the wrong hands who knows what havoc it could cause. I knew that I should burn the book, destroy it and be done with it. But it was also the only part that I had of my parents. I held it a close.
Chapter 31 — You Can Run, But You Can’t Hide
Three months had passed. With a bit of luck. Being able to sense Hunter, I managed give him the slip once. He was getting closer to town, but with help from a spell I had learned, I was keeping tabs on him. I managed to get a bus out of town and started another trip to nowhere. I couldn’t believe he came after me. I thought that he would have found out about me by now. That he wouldn’t want to do anything with me. I had been in this city for almost two months and there were no signs of him. I worked at a small diner that mostly catered to truck drivers and a few mill workers. The owner was an older man.
I had arrived by waking in his house, terrified. He had found me ragged and homeless travelling on the side of the road. He comforted me with stories of his own daughter, who passed away a season earlier in a drunk driving accident. He was a widower, and older. He owned a diner and offered me a job and a place to stay.
I was grateful that not only did he offer me a job but let me stay in the apartment above the diner for a discounted price. I didn’t want to live a life struggling to get by on my own all the time. I squeezed my eyes shut. Pain tore through my heart. I was wiping down a table when the bell jingled. The diner wasn’t large; it had a couple booths and tables, with bar seating. It was the dead of winter and we were near closing. I didn’t even look up thinking that it was one of the regulars coming to get take out. The owner had left me to finish closing since there was a blizzard due. It wasn’t until I caught his scent, the scent that I could never forget, that I knew I was wrong.
My head snapped up. I looked at the snow covered stranger. His eyes were hidden behind sunglasses and his hair was covered by a hat. His nostrils flared, and his hands opened and closed. His spine straightened before he moved.
He strode forward determined, knowing exactly what he was coming for. He wrapped me up in his arms and swooped down in a crushing kiss. My eyes shut against the sweet assault. With him this close I couldn’t resist him, nor could I resist the wants of my wolf, of my own heart.
“Long time, Colette,” Hunter whispered against my lips, giving us the closeness we needed.
“What are you doing here, Hunter? I did this to protect you.” I answered my voice breathless. I pressed my hand against his cheek but I didn’t look at him. I couldn’t. Not yet.
“I’m not letting you go without a fight, Colette.”
“I didn’t ask you to fight for me.”
“You never have to ask. I told you that I’m yours, and you told me that you were mine.”
“Hunter…” I looked up at him. I pushed his sunglasses off so I could really see him.
“I know why you are running. I would have done anything to save you from what you had to go through. I would never have asked you to kill your own mother for me.”
I stepped back, but he didn’t let me go far.
“How did…”
“Jackson told me what happened. I know you, Colette.” He cupped my cheeks gently and searched my eyes. “My sweet, selfless, Colette. I don’t think I could ever thank you for everything you did to protect me. Would you allow me to protect you?”
I didn’t know what to say to Hunter. There were tears in my eyes just thinking about how he apologized in his own way. That he understood everything. That he didn’t look at me with hatred. I knew the moment I grabbed his hand and started leading him upstairs I probably shouldn’t. He couldn’t know everything.
Still, I couldn’t stop.
I lead him silently upstairs. He leaned down and pressed small kisses against my neck as I unlocked the small, one bedroom apartment. I tilted my neck and opened myself to him.
We slipped inside. I tore off his clothes. I had been cold for months, only Hunter could give me the warmth that I sought. The comfort that he gave me, and sense of home.
Hunter watched me in his quiet way. We didn’t speak. I swallowed hard as I tentatively lifted my arms up. I felt nervous, which seemed silly, because we had done this before. It felt different this time though. My heart was racing. My palms felt clammy.
Hunter started to unzip my skirt. I unbuttoned my shirt. His hands slipped between the fabric of my skirt and touched my skin. His was rough, but his touch gentle. The effect had me feeling all fluttery. I barely held onto control.
His hands brushed over my ass as he pushed my skirt of my work uniform down. I trembled at his touch. Once it got past my mid thighs, it dropped. Without thinking I stepped out of the now useless circle of fabric. Next to follow was my shirt. My breath caught in my lungs when he touched me there, on my breast, over my heart. The fire of passion burned more brightly. He tweaked my nipple. I gasped. I shut my eyes against the sensation. Once his hands roamed down my ribs to my hips did I open them again.
I tugged at the bottom of his shirt, loosening it, my hands touching his skin. I started to lift his shirt, and with Hunter’s help it came off. I ran my hands down his biceps, watching as the skin pebbled under my touch. I held his hands in mine.
Our kisses became more feverish. His lips moved across my now swollen lips to my cheek. I was left trying to breathe. I couldn’t get close enough to him. His hand wrapped around the back of my neck, tangling in my hair. And the other tugged my hips impossibly close. His beard caused friction against my cheek, all the way to the crook between my jaw and ear.
I turned my head so that I was hidden in his neck and gave him the same treatment. A desperation took over me. With Hunter’s help my legs were now around him. I had jumped while he pushed his arm under my ass, lifting me.
We never broke away from each other’s lips, which had found each other again. Hunter strode forward, placing one knee on the bed. He leaned over me, pressing my back into the bed. How did I survive so long without him?
I unbuttoned his pants, I unwrapped my legs so that I could push his jeans down. He was wearing black boxer briefs. Lust filled me with need for him, needed all of him bare to me. With Hunter’s help the briefs were gone seconds after his jeans.
My wolf was moving closer to the surface. And then I looked in his eyes. This wasn’t Hunter, the wolf, needing to feel his mate. It was Hunter the man who needed me. I reached around and unclasped my bra letting it fall and slide off the bed. He moved his hands under the edge of my underwear, his warm hands pulled them down my legs, letting his fingers trail against the length of my legs.
I was panting for breath when his lips left mine and started down my neck. They dragged against my skin. He slid down my neck with his mouth, gently tonguing, sending thrills through me as my hands clutched in his hair. Hunter nibbled on my collar bone, extracting a moan. This was what I needed.
Him.
<
br /> My hands trailed their way from his biceps down to his solid ass. Hunter moved between my legs and I urged him forward. He lined up his manhood with my desire. I could feel his velvety hardness so close. My heat spilled from me. Hungry. And then he paused. I looked up to him, confused. He was a mixture of joy, hunger and need. And then he slammed into me, fulfilling my lust.
My eyes rolled into the back of my head as my body arched forward, trying to take more. It had been so very long since I had been with him, but my body was needy for his size. My body expanded around him.
I swallowed hard. The feeling of him inside of me was perfect. I had never felt as complete as I did then.
I wrapped my legs around him, locking my ankles to keep him close. He was pressed small kisses to my breasts while he moved inside of me. Finally he took a nipple between his lips. I groaned when he found that sensitive tip, and sucked hard.
“Hunter…” I whispered. My body was tingling, everything felt like it was on fire. I was ready to explode.
“I love you, Colette,” he pushed forward once more, sending waves of pleasure through me. I came violently with him still inside me. At the same time, he covered my mouth with his, his kiss swallowing my scream of pleasure. He followed moments after. I watched as he came.
Hunter rolled us so that he was lying next to me. That was when I noticed the dark circles under his eyes, and the disarray of his beard. It wasn’t as clean-kept as he been keeping it before. I brushed a piece of hair out of his face. He looked exhausted, but at peace.
He was so vulnerable now, so open to me. I didn’t want to cry and ruin this moment for us, but I knew this might be it for us. This might be our last time.
“I love you too.”
I shouldn’t have told him that. It was the truth, but the truth would sooner destroy us than it would save us.
****
We slept close together that night. I didn’t think anything could keep us apart. I didn’t want to leave his side, not even for a moment. His arm wrapped around my waist. Things had changed drastically in the month I was kidnapped, and I had grown more accustomed to early morning training. So I wasn’t expecting Hunter to be awake when I began to stir. My muscles twitched. If I stayed, I was scared of what he would come to realize. What I still had yet to tell him, but I never wanted to. It was time for me to start to disappear again. Instead I felt his arm tighten.
Hexed Hearts Page 35
