The Year of Living Shamelessly

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The Year of Living Shamelessly Page 18

by Susanna Carr


  Just when she thought she couldn’t take much more, she came violently. She lurched forward, the handcuffs tightening against her wrists as she arched wildly from the bed. The climax tore through her, stealing her strength, squeezing her last breath, until she collapsed on the mattress, bewildered and exhausted.

  She was dimly aware of Ryder crawling above her, his body barely touching hers. She stared at him, in a daze, as he reached for her cuffs. Katie heard the rasp of the Velcro and her arms dropped on the mattress above her head. They felt heavy and not quite a part of her.

  Ryder reached for one of her arms and roughly massaged her from her elbow to her fingers. She groaned and winced. The pin-pricks of sensations stung as she regained circulation.

  “You shouldn’t have been in these cuffs this long,” Ryder lectured her gruffly as he reached for the other arm.

  “Next time don’t argue with me for so long,” she said lazily and her head lolled to one side.

  “I mean it, Katie. You are too new to bondage to stay in these cuffs for long periods of time.”

  “I’m lucky to have such an expert taking care of me,” she said with a cheeky grin. Her smile disappeared when she saw the guilty look on Ryder’s face. She knew from past experience that his expression meant trouble. “What’s wrong?”

  He absently rubbed her arms hard enough to make her wince. “We need to talk,” he said, as if he had just made up his mind.

  Katie’s stomach gave a painful twist. She didn’t think she could cope with any more of Ryder’s surprises. But nothing could be worse than his announcement that he was leaving, right? “Well, don’t keep me in suspense,” she said, trying to offer a nonchalant smile.

  “I don’t know where you got this idea about me. Well, there were the old rumors, but it’s not who I am today.”

  Katie gave an impatient sigh. “Ryder, just spill it.”

  He looked directly into her eyes. “I’m not deep into the bondage lifestyle.”

  She blinked and stared at him as his words packed a punch straight to her chest. “Excuse me?”

  “I don’t need to tie women up every time to enjoy sex. I don’t know where you got the idea that I did.” Ryder’s mouth slanted into a devilish smile. “Not that I’m complaining.”

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  “You are a rat bastard!” She grabbed the pillow from under her head. Her arms were still weak and stinging, but that didn’t stop her from hitting Ryder squarely on his chest. “What do you mean, you aren’t into bondage?”

  “I have fun with it, and there was a time I was seriously into it, but it isn’t something I need to do.” He shrugged his large shoulders. “I like variety.”

  She couldn’t believe it! Katie hit him again with the pillow and it glanced off his shoulder. “How did you know about the club?” She thwacked him again, this time on the side of his head. “And you had a blindfold!”

  He grabbed the pillow and tossed it on the floor. He leaned in, his hips grinding into hers, until Katie was lying on her back and her hands were on either side of her face. “Bondage was something I experimented with years ago.”

  She didn’t care how long it had been for him. That didn’t change one important fact. “I let you blindfold me!” She couldn’t believe she had been through all of that when it wasn’t necessary. She was outraged. She was embarrassed.

  “It’s not something to be upset about. I—”

  “Don’t get upset?” Spoken like a guy. “I don’t think you get it. I tied myself to your bed.”

  His dark eyes twinkled and she knew he was remembering the moment he walked in and saw her gift-wrapped just for him. “I got to admit, that was pretty hot.”

  She grabbed the collar of his sweatshirt, pulled him down until his crooked nose bumped against the tip of hers. Katie glared at him. “You wanted me to call you Master.”

  He ducked his head and a red flush streaked his cheekbones. “I know, I know. I went too far. I don’t know what got into me. It was like the role took over.” He glanced back at her. “But I knew you would never call me that.”

  She hadn’t been so sure. There had been too many close calls when she would have said anything to find the ultimate satisfaction with Ryder. She hoped he would never find out the truth or his arrogance would have no bounds.

  “I don’t believe this.” She let go of his sweatshirt and tried to push him away, but he was too strong and heavy. “All this time I was worried that I wanted a guy who was sexually incompatible.”

  “Believe me, that is no longer something to worry about,” he said huskily as he sat up and caressed her arms, each stroke leisurely and possessive.

  She swatted his hands away, not willing to forgive him quickly. “Why didn’t you correct my assumption?”

  He rubbed the back of his neck, clearly uncomfortable to admit the truth. “I thought it would ward you off. How was I supposed to know it would make you more interested?”

  Now she was the one blushing. The kinky side of Ryder had fascinated her. She pointed at him, jabbing her finger into his chest with each word. “You owe me.”

  “Hey, it’s not a complete lie.” Ryder grabbed her hand and brought it up to his mouth. He brushed his lips along her knuckles before turning her hand over and placing a kiss at the center of her palm. “I like a little kink. Who doesn’t?”

  She curled her hand and tried to pull away from his grip. “You are not getting off that easy.”

  “I know,” Ryder admitted with another charming smile. “But what made you think I was heavy into bondage? My past isn’t that well known.”

  “It’s known to your ex-girlfriends.” They knew he had some experience, but they also must have known that he wasn’t deep into the lifestyle. When Hilary had started asking around, she’d failed to take into account that Tatum, Sasha, Jessica and Emily were all friends with one another. Low-down and dirty friends.

  Katie’s eyes narrowed into angry slits. They must have purposely told Hilary stories to make Katie run in the other direction. They had played her well, but they made the tactical error of thinking she was too much of a good girl to go after someone as kinky as Ryder. “I’m going to kill them,” she said in a vicious growl.

  “Why?” Ryder asked as he captured her wrists and pinned them down on either side of her head. “You had fun.”

  Okay, yes, she had. She had enjoyed some experiences more than others. But even more than that, she discovered some things about herself, both good and bad. But that wasn’t the point!

  “I don’t care,” she insisted as she attempted to wiggle out of his grasp with no success. “I’m going to get even with you all. One by one. Starting with you!”

  Amusement gleamed in his eyes and he indicated her predicament with the tilt of his head. “How do you plan to do that?” he purred, wrapping his large fingers around her wrists.

  Good question. She probably looked ridiculous making these bold claims while Ryder was straddling her and pinning her arms down, and after he had claimed her so intimately. “Just watch your back, Ryder. I’ll make my move when you least expect it.”

  Her intimidating words had the opposite effect, as Ryder started to chuckle. Katie knew she was a fool in love, because as much as his reaction irritated her, her heart gave a funny little flip as she watched him laugh.

  “I’ll tell you what,” Ryder said as he released her wrists. “I’ll let you tie me up.”

  “Say what?” She sat up abruptly, her head clipping Ryder’s chin.

  “Just once,” he said as he rubbed his hand over his jawline. “Then we’ll call it even.”

  Katie maneuvered into a kneeling position. “That doesn’t quite balance the scales,” she complained. This guy had her jumping through hoops, wearing fetish clothes in public, and visiting bondage clubs. She deserved more than one time.

  His smile disappeared. “I’m not making this offer lightly.”

  Katie knew that. Allowing her to take control and letting her have her revenge wh
ile he was tied up took courage. Especially for someone like Ryder, who was always in total command of his surroundings. She hoped he wouldn’t regret it.

  “Have you ever been tied up before?” she asked.

  “No, you’ll be the first.” He curled his finger under her chin and lifted her face to look directly into her eyes. “But I trust you.”

  She knew it, but the words meant a lot to her. “Don’t think that’s going to make me go easy on you,” she teased, trying to lighten the mood that had grown suddenly serious.

  “So, how about it, Katie?” He waggled his eyebrows, making her laugh. “Are you going to tie me up?”

  “Now?” Her X-rated fantasy bloomed in full Technicolor before her eyes. She could easily imagine him tied to the bed, spread eagled and aroused, calling out her name as she rode him hard.

  “Now,” he confirmed, the wicked glint in his eyes making her shiver with anticipation.

  She ran her tongue along the edge of her teeth. She could do this. She could be the confident, sensual, powerful woman of her dreams. This was going to be fun. “Take off your shirt.”

  His eyebrow went up. “Are you giving me orders?”

  “Yes, I am. Do you have a problem with that? You had your chance to be dominant—now it’s my turn.”

  “I wasn’t pretending.”

  She didn’t doubt it. Ryder had that kind of personality. He had a commanding presence and often managed to take over without anyone realizing it. But he was going to find out that she could also take control in the bedroom.

  Katie reached for his sweatshirt and pulled it over Ryder’s head with his assistance. Once he tossed the shirt over his shoulder, Katie ran her hands along the planes and indentations of his chest. She moved closer and laved her tongue against his flat brown nipples while exploring his washboard abs with her hands.

  Katie bit down on his nipple and smiled when Ryder lurched. When she licked his nipple, Ryder grabbed the back of her head, threading his fingers through her long black hair. She had a feeling Ryder was not going to submit easily.

  She released his nipple and looked up at his face. The desire glittering in his eyes heightened her excitement. She felt naughty and she wanted to test her limits and push her luck. “Ryder,” she said sweetly, “you haven’t earned the right to touch me.”

  His jaw dropped open before a reluctant smile tugged at his mouth. “So, you’re going to play it that way.”

  “It’s only fair,” she told him as she reached down and rubbed his hard cock through his jeans. She cupped him and gave a hard squeeze. Ryder inhaled sharply, the air hissing through his clenched teeth. “Let go of my hair,” she said.

  There was a pause as he wrestled against his natural inclination. She could see the internal battle shining from his dark eyes. She gave her hand a little twist and Ryder flinched.

  “Surrendering isn’t easy,” she said knowingly. “Now you know how I felt.”

  Ryder slowly untangled his hand from her hair, taking his sweet time about it. He let it be known that he was humoring her. He didn’t see her as a force to be reckoned with. At least, not yet. Maybe she should bind his hands before continuing. Ryder was so much stronger and more experienced that he could take control from her if she wasn’t careful.

  “Lie down,” she told him, knowing that she had to make her request firmly but sweetly. If she barked at him like a drill sergeant, he would quit on the spot. Katie placed her hands on his shoulders and guided him down. When he was sprawled onto the mattress she straddled his hips. Ryder placed his hands on her legs and caressed her thighs.

  “Hands above your head,” she ordered, hoping he would listen. Silently, he did as she asked, but his eyes still twinkled. Here she was trying to be tough and Ryder found it entertaining. How amusing would it be when he was tied to the bed, vulnerable and trusting her?

  She leaned over him to cuff his wrists. Her breasts dangled en ticingly over his mouth. She dipped her spine a little more than necessary to tease him. Ryder tilted his head and playfully closed his lips over her laced-covered curves.

  Katie tried to focus on her task, making sure the cuffs were extra snug. It was difficult when Ryder was teasing her breasts with his mouth. When she completed the job, her nipples were tight and red, her nightie wet and transparent.

  “Take off your gown,” Ryder said in a husky voice.

  “No.” She shook her head slowly, even though the nightie no longer served as a shield. “You don’t give the orders. Just for that I will not take off my clothes.”

  His eyes flashed with annoyance, but his jaw was set when he recognized those words. To her surprise, he didn’t complain. He had known what he was getting into when he made this offer, but obviously he hadn’t expected it would be this difficult.

  Katie crawled down his body, placing random kisses on his body as she went. She allowed her long hair to drag along Ryder’s chest and loved the feel of his muscles twitching beneath her.

  She removed Ryder’s belt before she slowly unzipped his jeans. She shoved the denim and underwear down his hips. Katie had planned to strip him bare, but at the last moment she decided to stop midway. With his clothes bunched at his knees, it restricted his movements. She wanted to heighten his sense of being trapped.

  Kneeling at his side, Katie ignored Ryder’s questioning look as she left his jeans dangling on his legs and focused her attention on his cock. She cupped his length with both hands and felt the tremor sweep through him.

  Katie gripped him hard and pulled up, one hand after the other. She did it again and again, listening to Ryder’s deep, uneven breaths. Just when he got used to the rhythm, Katie gave her tight fist a twist.

  Ryder’s hips vaulted from the mattress as his growl echoed in the bedroom. Was it wrong to enjoy having Ryder beneath her, unable to stop her from doing everything and anything she wanted? When lust and power mixed in her blood, it was a heady combination.

  She knelt down and covered the tip of his cock with her wet mouth. The growl transformed into a low moan. Ryder’s lean hips rocked as she bumped his cock with her hands while swirling her tongue along the rounded trip.

  Katie hummed with pleasure as she licked him. He tasted of hot, aroused male. She wanted more and drew him deep in her mouth. She continued to pump him with one hand as she fondled his balls with the other.

  “Katie,” Ryder said with a hint of warning in his voice, “if you keep doing that, this will end before it starts.”

  Katie reluctantly released him, his cock sliding from her mouth with a pop. It was thick and erect, curving toward his flat stomach. As much as she wanted to tease Ryder, she wanted this fantasy to last as long as possible.

  She turned to face Ryder, noticing the rigid expression as he tried to hold on to his slipping control. She licked her lips and watched the ruddy color suffuse his face. “Tell me you have condoms,” she said.

  One of his eyebrows lifted. “After all the planning you did to get in here, you didn’t remember condoms?”

  “Ryder.” He had better have condoms or they were going to be in for some very torturous moments.

  Ryder grinned when he saw the flash of concern on her face. “In the drawer.” He angled his head toward the bedside table.

  Katie got off the bed and opened the drawer.“No toys?” she teased as she pulled a foil pouch from the box. “Not even a blindfold?”

  “You have my blindfold,” he reminded her.

  “I wish I had brought it here,” she said as she opened the foil and removed the condom.

  He shook his head. “You would never have gotten it on me.”

  “Oh, I’m sure I could have convinced you,” she said as she returned to the bed, giving a little naughty sway to her step.

  “You couldn’t even bribe me to do it.”

  Katie smiled as she straddled him again. She’d let him think that, but she knew differently. Ryder wouldn’t have thought he’d let her tie him to his bed, and look at where he was now. She was beginnin
g to understand just how much power and influence she had over Ryder.

  But as she rolled the condom on his cock with such agonizing slowness that Ryder bucked and thrust his lean hips, Katie realized she shouldn’t do anything to abuse her power. She wanted to test their boundaries, but she didn’t want to cause a rift in their relationship. She wanted this kind of closeness, and she wanted moments like these when he would demonstrate his trust in her—even if she only had a couple more days to do it.

 

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