by Vivian Wood
“Hmm,” she says, her brow puckering. “Hey, have you had any luck with the sperm donors’ binder?”
I flap my hand. “Ugh, no. I’ve narrowed it to like… the whole list.”
She grins at that. “So selective!”
“You want to hear something crazy?”
“Always.”
“I almost asked him to be a 1 night stand, just to see if… you know… he wanted to help me speed up the process a little?” I cringe as I say it.
Olive’s mouth forms a perfect O. It takes a second before she can speak.
“Wait, you were just going to like… use him for his sperm?”
“Well, yeah. The fact that he was hotter than fire didn’t hurt, either.”
“Omigod, really? That’s completely amazing. I hope you got his number.”
I feel the heat rising in my cheeks. Milo jumps up on the counter again, and I pick him up, stroking his soft fur.
“Actually, yeah. I did.”
Olive looks at me with a considering expression.
“Are you thinking about dating him?” she asks.
“Oh my god, no. He seems like a total player. I don’t have that kind of time. Especially not if I’m going to go ahead with the sperm donor thing…”
A mischievous smile curls her lips. “So like… why don’t you just skip the dating part and ask him if he wants to bang?”
“You mean… like to procreate?” I ask.
“Yeah, why not? You could tell him, or not.” She pauses. “It’s just a suggestion.”
I roll my eyes. Milo wriggles to be let out of my arms, so I put him down. “I would have to tell the father of my baby that I was trying to get knocked up. It’s only the decent thing to do, Olive.”
She shrugs. “If you think so.”
“I’d have to, I think. Like personally, for me. But like… how do you even bring that up? ‘Hey, Mr. Sexy Man, is it cool if we don’t use protection? I’m trying to get pregnant’.”
Olive cackles. “I’d just get him a little buzzed and lay all my cards on the table. It would probably help if you dressed sexy…”
“Ugh, I don’t know. He will probably hear the word baby and get the fuck out of there.”
Olive looks speculative. “Show me a picture of him?”
I shake my head. “I don’t have one.”
“Do you know his name?”
“Yeah, Jett James.”
“That sounds familiar. Hmmm…” She whips out her phone and types something, scrolling through a few pages. “Wait… is this him?”
She turns the phone screen toward me, and Jett is splashed across it.
“Yep, that’s him,” I say.
“Dude! He’s fucking hot! And he was a baseball player, that’s why his name sounds familiar. Oooh, I bet he’s got great genes!”
I sigh. “Olive…”
“Seriously, is he taller than you? It says that he’s 6’3.”
“Well, yeah… a lot taller…”
She sits up straight, as if a decision has been made.
“Okay, give me your phone.”
I give her side eye. “What for?”
“You are totally making a date with this guy. If nothing else, you can bang it out and never see him again.”
“Oh, I don’t know…”
“Seriously? Phone, now,” she demands.
I make an exasperated noise, then head into my bedroom to retrieve my phone. There’s a message from Jett already waiting when I pick up the phone.
I think we should go out sometime soon. For our relationship. ;)
Followed by, PS you looked fucking amazing in that skirt last night.
I blush so hard, I’m sure that my cheeks are aflame. I carry my phone into the kitchen.
“He texted me,” I say, offering Olive the phone.
She reads his texts, and lets out a whoop of joy. “Yes! You’re totally going out with him, one hundred percent.”
After a second of thinking, she texts him a single word.
Tonight?
I want to punch her for hitting send without my okay, but the three little dots appear, indicating that he’s writing back.
“I can’t believe you did that,” I say.
“You’re welcome,” Olive says, clearly proud of herself.
When he texts back, I almost jump out of my skin.
Not today. But I’m free the day after tomorrow. Sometime after 8. Will that do, princess?
I pull the phone away from Olive, worrying my lip. He’s already calling me pet names? I can’t decide if that’s hot or just too much.
“Seriously? This super hot guy is guaranteeing that he’s going to show up and give you his gift. Just say yes!” she practically shouts. When I still haven’t made up my mind a few seconds later, she grabs my phone.
I’ll be there, Daddy.
