by Edie Claire
He felt a spurt of horror. Was everything that had happened between him and Mei Lin just a set up? Had she known who he was all along, sought him out, grilled him for information? He grabbed her arms and set her firmly away from him again.
“Please don’t look at me like that,” she pleaded.
Could she read his mind, too? “You knew who I was!” he accused. “Did somebody hire you to find me?”
She shook her head in obvious disbelief. “Of course not! You’re the one who showed up randomly on my doorstep, remember?” she proclaimed, her gorgeous round cheeks flaring with indignation. “I had no idea you were connected to Stanley in any way until yesterday at the beach… when you started talking about your dad!”
The beach, his ailing brain repeated. Ah, yes. The beach. He had enjoyed the beach. And he had talked about his dad. But only because she had asked him questions!
“None of us would be the wiser in this whole insane situation if it weren’t for that silly gray bear cub!” she exclaimed, not giving up. “Don’t you see how it happened? Stanley went ape when I told him what I’d seen — he started spouting off all these fond memories of camping trips and bedtime stories… Imagine my surprise when you started telling me the same ones!”
Thane felt very odd. He didn’t want to believe the worst of Mei Lin, but then again… he did want to. Because if she was a nutcase or some clever operative either one, he could forget all her nonsense and go back to his normal life. But if she was genuine, if she was telling the truth…
No. She couldn’t be.
“I didn’t think too much of the similarities between the bear stories,” she continued, her words flowing rapidly. “I mean, that could have been a coincidence. But when you said that your father was a surgeon, it all seemed a bit much. As soon as you left with Dave, I got online and searched for an article on the kidnapping, and then I saw the name: Stanley Buchanan. I went straight out to Stanley ‘Smith’s’ cabin and confronted him, and he didn’t even bother denying it!”
Thane’s grip on normalcy was loosening. He was falling into the abyss. He remembered exactly what had happened on the beach — it was only yesterday. Your dad… she had asked him as they paused to pick berries. You said he was a surgeon? A sudden breeze had tousled her dark hair, buffeting her pretty face. She had been looking at him with a queer expression. A puzzled, slightly freaked-out expression.
Dear God. She didn’t know, did she? Not before then. He’d left her shortly after that, and he hadn’t come back until evening. There’s a lot I want to tell you, she’d told him just after their siblings invaded. But I’m afraid it’ll have to wait… It’s my patient up in the cabin. We have some unfinished business I need to tend to…
His body felt cold. It all fit, dammit. Every last bit of it. Mei Lin wasn’t lying.
But if she was telling the truth, that would mean… He stiffened. No. All it meant was that some man claiming to be Stanley Buchanan was living in a cabin in Gustavus.
“Are you all right?” Mei Lin whispered anxiously, moving closer. “Please tell me you’re okay. I really am sorry to have to tell you like this. It’s just that… we don’t have much time. He didn’t want you or Jason to know because he thinks you’ll hate him, even though he really did do it to keep you both safe. He isn’t a perfect man, Thane, but he loves you. He loves both of you very much. When he was delirious, his boys were the first thing on his mind.”
Thane couldn’t think clearly. Her words penetrated in fits and starts. He got that she bought this man’s story hook, line, and sinker, but he didn’t have to. He wasn’t going to.
We don’t have much time, she was saying. About that much, she was probably right. He lifted his head and scanned the green, soggy forest through the dashes of water falling from the sky. Somewhere in this vast sea of vegetation, a man was out in the rain without a coat. He was ill and exhausted. He might even be dying. Whoever the hell he was, Mei Lin cared about him. That was enough. For now.
“You do believe me,” she said softly, almost begging. “Don’t you?”
“I believe you,” he said easily. You’ve just been had, that’s all. He threw his arm around her shoulders and gave her a friendly squeeze. “Let’s keep looking.”
***
Mei Lin felt like crying again. But after the last jag, her reserves were empty. Thane didn’t believe her. His perfunctory, dismissive hug had confirmed it. He wasn’t angry, so he must not think she was lying. More likely, he thought she was delusional. Never mind the illogic of that scenario. She supposed that under the circumstances, it was the easiest thing for him to believe. But it wouldn’t save his father’s life.
“Stanley won’t respond to me,” she repeated. “He’s mad at me for betraying his confidence. Besides which, he still wants to die. There are only two people in this world who have the power to convince him that his sons would want to know him, that they won’t hate him, that there could be some purpose for his future. You need to call out to him, Thane. You and Jason, not me.”
He stared at her with a vacant expression. The damnable rain kept coming. It was lighter now, but enough had already fallen to soak through Stanley’s clothes.
“You have his eyes, Thane,” she said, her sense of desperation increasing. “I noticed that first thing, long before any of the rest of it came out. You don’t look much like him otherwise, but I nearly did a double take when I saw Jason. He looks so much like your dad. Or at least, what I imagine Stanley looked like when he was younger.”
Thane did not respond. But it was obvious that her words disturbed him. He must have seen enough pictures of his father to be aware of the family resemblances. She kept talking. “He said that his grandfather had seen a glacier bear in Yakutat. He mentioned having cousins up there. Someone named Uncle Regis, maybe?”
Thane’s eyes widened. How she wished she could remember more details! “He talked about how much he loved taking the two of you out on bear quests. He said he would tell stories where the boys looking for the bear were brothers, one with brown hair and one blond. I assume Jason was blond when he was little, right?”
Thane still didn’t answer. His face had gone white.
“One story was about the boys hiding their food in a tree, but I can’t remember anything else. He only talked about having sons when he was overexcited or feverish. Otherwise, he denied it. Adamantly. When I mentioned to him what he had said while he was delirious, he got frightened. He’s spent the last twenty years pretending to be somebody else to protect his family. He couldn’t tell the truth to anyone. He believed that a man named Tony Russo wanted him dead and wouldn’t hesitate to use his family to flush him out. The criminals were skeptical that Stanley had died in the raid. They even sent some men to his funeral, to see if any of the family’s reactions seemed insincere—”
“Stop!” Thane thundered, his face now suffused with red. He stared at her for a long moment, his eyes wild and unseeing, before his shoulders slumped and his gaze fell away. “Please, Mei Lin. Just stop,” he said in a hoarse whisper. “Okay?”
Mei Lin stopped. She wanted to touch him, but she didn’t think it was a good idea. The poor man was reeling. What he probably needed most at this particular moment was some space.
She stepped away. Her heart pounded in her chest; raindrops pattered onto her hood. She moved to the mile marker, then looked around for a stick. Once she’d found a suitable tool, she looked from the red stake to a recognizable tree stump in the distance and drew a mental line between the two. Then she began to move along it, using her stick to part the underbrush. Any place large enough to hide a huddled man was suspect. “Stanley!” she called out. “It’s Mei Lin. Will you answer me? Please?”
She had not been searching long before she realized that Thane had joined her. He had a stick of his own and was moving along a parallel path. “Stanley!” he called out suddenly, making her jump. His voice was tremulous, uncertain. She didn’t speak to him, but kept on with her work.
�
��Stanley Buchanan!” he called again, this time with an edge of frustrated anger. “Are you out here? Can you hear me?”
She paused to listen for any response. All she heard was the thudding of the rain.
On Thane’s next shout, his voice broke a little. And so did Mei Lin’s heart.
“Dad?”
Chapter 28
Mei Lin continued to poke her stick into anything she couldn’t see through — dense bushes, leafy plants, the dark caverns formed by fallen trees and their broken, moss-covered appendages. She could see no sign of Stanley or any other human. What bothered her more was that she could hear nothing, either.
As unsure as she was whether Stanley would respond to her calls, she’d been certain that a direct plea from either of his sons would undo him. If only he was conscious, his physical weakness should render him even more vulnerable to his emotions. Only a man of stone could fail to be moved by the pain-filled longing in Thane’s voice — even if it was eclipsed, much of the time, by a more obvious frustrated anger.
No, she told herself miserably, Stanley couldn’t possibly be ignoring his son’s cries. He was either unconscious, incapable of responding, or both. He was already weak when he left home; by now he would be dehydrated and exhausted as well. Throw in a little recurrent fever and the man was a walking recipe for light-headedness, dizziness, and mental confusion. Even without a relapse of infection, he could have weakened himself to the point of passing out. And if the worst were true — if his infection had never completely cleared and was spreading through his bloodstream — he might once again be flirting with potentially fatal septic shock.
Was he confused and disoriented from the illness when he’d left his jacket in the kayak? Or was that the deliberate act of a man hell-bent on dying by exposure? Mei Lin didn’t know. She wasn’t even sure which was worse. All she knew was that they had to find him.
A man’s voice in the distance startled her into silence. But her hopeful elation was short-lived. The voice that called to them from up the trail was far too hale and hearty to have come from Stanley, even if it did bear a clear resemblance in timbre.
“It’s Jason,” Thane announced. He turned and carefully backtracked toward the trail, and Mei Lin did the same. Within a few moments they reached the mile marker and met up with both their siblings and a younger male ranger.
Ri stepped up to Mei Lin and enfolded her sister in a hug. Ri said nothing, which was typical, but Mei Lin had only to look at the supportive, empathetic expression in her sister’s dark eyes to know that the other search party had found nothing. While the men compared notes, Mei Lin stood silently and listened, paying particular attention to how Thane acted with Jason. She had no idea whether he would share his newfound knowledge with his younger brother. If he didn’t, should she? She didn’t know Jason well enough to guess how he would react.
“Dave says the state troopers have been notified and the volunteer search and rescue in Gustavus is on the way,” Jason told her.
Mei Lin nodded without speaking. She appreciated Jason’s helpfulness today more than she could say. He barely knew her and Stanley meant nothing to him — yet just like Thane he’d immediately offered to help, tossing aside his personal plans without complaint.
“They bringing dogs?” Thane asked.
“We hope so,” the young ranger answered. He looked barely out of college, but had a definite air of confidence about him. “The dogs are in high demand this time of year, but we’ll get them here as soon as we can.”
Neither of the brothers made any response to that, and Mei Lin’s minimal sense of relief disintegrated. Dogs, like everyone and everything else, could only be brought into Gustavus by boat or plane.
Stanley had only so much time.
Her eyes grew blurry with tears again and she swore internally, determined to keep herself in check. Emotional outbursts weren’t going to help the situation. Only physical effort could do that. As the others discussed how to plot out a search grid, she returned to the imaginary line she’d started on earlier and got back to work.
She had only just reached her previous stopping point when a subtle, but distinctive sound drew her attention. It was a slapping, drumming, sort of sound. The sort of sound that would usually make her fear attack by some unseen but rapidly approaching animal. But this sound came with a clear note of deja vu, and instead of being frightened, her heavy heart leapt. She stood on tiptoe and lifted her chin. She couldn’t see the trail itself from where she stood; anything beneath shoulder height was hidden by the underbrush. But she could see the heads of the others also turning toward the sound. Seconds later the tops of some of the bushes between her and the trail began to rustle. Then, like a torpedo, a smallish form burst out of the greenery, knocking both leaves and small branches askew in its eagerness to reach her.
“Kibbe!” she cried, dropping her stick and attempting to embrace the squiggling, sycophantic little canine. “How did you get out here? And how did you find me?” The answer to her second question was obvious. He was a dog, wasn’t he? He had followed her scent.
Loud voices from the trail soon answered the first question. Jesse had brought him after receiving a call from Dave. Kibbe was no trained tracker, Jesse explained to the others, but hell — what dog couldn’t catch up with its own master?
Mei Lin hurried over to the others with the excited mutt at her heels.
“I didn’t even know he had a dog,” Thane exclaimed, his voice brighter. “But I’m glad Dave thought of it!”
The optimism in his voice buoyed Mei Lin’s spirits more than she could say. “Won’t the rain make it harder?” she asked, even as she remembered how easily the dog had tracked her just now.
“Nah,” Thane answered, bending down to greet the dog himself. “A little bit of wetness actually refreshes a scent. Brings it out. As long as we don’t get torrents, this little guy should be able to smell just fine.”
Mei Lin smiled. The rain had been constant, but at least it was mostly light. “Well, let’s do it!”
None of them needed to do anything. Kibbe was already sniffing in earnest, his tail wagging frantically as his nose surveyed the ground all around the mile marker.
“Stanley probably spent some time right here,” Thane said thoughtfully, watching the dog. “Before he decided which direction to head.”
Mei Lin held her breath. Kibbe was milling about like an ant, seemingly without purpose or direction. He kept seeming to find something and moving forward quickly, only to stop and turn sharply or backtrack altogether.
“See that? He knows his master was here,” Jesse said confidently. “Come on, boy. You can do it. Which way did he go?”
Kibbe began to strut a straight line north up the trail. “Oh no,” Mei Lin worried. “He isn’t tracing Stanley backwards to the kayak, is he?”
“Let’s see,” Thane answered as they followed a few paces behind the dog. When Kibbe stopped short to examine a clump of devil’s club on the forest side of the trail, all the humans paused and held their breaths.
Then, without warning, the dog plunged headlong into the brush. His lithe brown body disappeared from view almost immediately, leaving a rustling of the leaves above him as the only sign of his passing. Thankfully, that alone was enough for them to see that he was moving quickly, pushing deeper into the damp, thick forest.
Thane hastened after him, and Mei Lin followed.
***
Thane kept his gaze on the stirring vegetation, uncharacteristically heedless of where he stepped. He was trying hard to stay focused, but his head was all over the damn place. Mei Lin wasn’t crazy; he knew that now. Her story was wildly unbelievable, but then so was any other explanation for the situation. In fact, every one he’d conjured up so far made even less sense.
He didn’t die.
That concept had taken root now, and as it festered in his psyche it created an intolerable mixture of elation and horror.
He had a wife and children… he didn’t want t
o put them in any kind of danger…
Thane could understand that much. He wanted to believe that it was love and concern for him and Jason — neat and tidy — that had prompted this miserable travesty. But he didn’t really believe that. Life was never that simple. Thane had a mother, too, didn’t he? Stanley had had a wife. But what kind of marriage? How many mornings, when they’d still lived in the Seattle apartment, had Thane awakened to find his father snoring on the couch? How many times, after they moved to the house in the suburbs, had he wondered how long a marriage could last when the parties had separate bedrooms?
What part had his mother played in this insane drama? Had she been hoodwinked along with the rest of them?
A familiar image loomed up in his memory, bringing with it the usual pang. His mother, dressed in a plain black shirt and pants, crying buckets as she stood by her husband’s grave. Her mascara was grossly smeared, making her look like some freakish circus clown. She was no one Thane even knew. She was not his mother, and whatever she was crying about, it wasn’t his father.
They even sent some men to the funeral…
A wave of queasiness engulfed him. She knew then, didn’t she? Of course she did. She must have known everything… all along.
A short, sharp bark commanded his attention. Leaves rustled ten feet or so in front of him, but he could see nothing.
She knew. All the niggling questions that had plagued him since he was a boy — that giant cloud of uncertainty and confusion — all of it twisted up and funneled down into one cool, hard line of reasoning. She knew that Stanley was still alive. Yet she had wanted Thane and Jason to forget him. She had wanted to erase the man — permanently — from all of their lives. Even after the boys had grown up, when they could have understood the truth, she had continued to lie to them. She was still lying to them!
The dog whimpered. Thane moved closer to the sound. His face felt hot; something pounded inside his skull. His dad was just ahead. He really was. Right there under those jiggling ferns.
