Walking into the bar, Payton waved in greeting at Rita and then ran in back to change. Tonight was going to be busy. It was Friday and a local high school team had a big game on. Many of the regular patrons were fans, and they were bound to cause a huge scene later that night, no matter what the end score was. It was good for business, but it was going to be a crazy night.
“How are you, Sweetie?” Rita looked over at her as she poured a beer from the tap.
“Good. I feel a lot better.” Payton climbed behind the bar and grabbed an apron.
“Your head’s not swimming anymore?”
“Nope. I snap back quick.”
Rita laughed. “Good skill to have.”
The first part of Payton’s shift was spent standing around, stocking the beer case, and cleaning random things that hadn’t seen the light of day for years. Everyone was still ramping up for the game, and wouldn’t be coming in until at least half time.
“You ready for tonight?” Rita asked. “Last time a local team had a game this big, someone drank so much they puked all over the bar.”
Payton looked up from her cutting board. “Seriously?”
“It was disgusting. I had to replace the wood because the damn stomach acid ate through the varnish. Could still smell it a week later.”
Payton swallowed against the sick feeling that rose in her throat at just the thought. “So how do we handle it if everyone goes crazy?”
“Reach under the beer case.”
Payton shot Rita a look, but then ducked down and reached her hand in as far as she could. Her hand brushed over cool metal and she tugged at it, pulling out a metal box from under the counter. Rita nodded and Payton opened the box, finding a Smith & Wesson 500. “You really went all out, didn’t you? You couldn’t have gone for a .22 or something?”
Rita laughed. “There’s a shotgun in the safe, too, but that’s for me.”
“You ever had to use one of these?”
“Pointed it at someone, yes. Never had to pull the trigger.” Rita grinned. “The first bit there usually does the trick.”
Payton nodded, staring down at the gun before closing the box and hastily stowing it back away.
“Should’ve shown you earlier.”
“Honestly, I’m kind of glad you didn’t. But it’s good to know it’s there now.” By the time Payton stood back up, the first wave of washed-up jocks was sauntering in. Each person ordered two shots of whiskey and a pint. They commandeered a table near the front so they could watch the game on the TV Rita had set up for the occasion. They were quickly followed by another group, this time local college kids, and then more. Most of the space at the bar was full and Payton could barely think with all the drink orders. She kept a tight a rein on her light as best she could, but every time she paused to draw breath, it felt like a hundred invisible little spikes were jostling for space in her brain. She closed her eyes to try to shut them all out.
“You, hey you!” So much for that. “Get me a beer, Sweetheart.”
As she ducked down to grab a glass, a shiver ran down the back of Payton’s neck, so strong she jolted and nearly bashed her head on the underside of the bar. The feeling only intensified as she took the man’s money and rang up the sale without saying a word. Her eyes flew over the crowd, but nobody stood out among the former players, old timers, and soccer moms out for a night on the town. She could try to sense out whoever was hiding out there in the bar with her light, but with such a large crowd, would she ever be able to find her way back into her own head?
“I’ll be back in a minute,” she called to Rita, who barely had time to wave at her, and then ran off to the bathroom. Slamming the door behind her, Payton quickly cleared the stalls before locking the main door. The room was dimly lit, but it was enough for her to see the wild look in her eyes. Her eyes reflected back in the mirror were wide and her hand trembled slightly as she turned on the tap. She splashed her face with cool water and took a deep breath.
Get yourself under control.
If this was real, if there was really someone out there, then her head had to be clear. Otherwise, all her work and training would be for nothing. Her luck would run out eventually and she needed to stay calm and remember exactly what she needed to do.
She sat down on the small folding chair in the corner and closed her eyes, envisioning the people in the bar. She could keep a little more distance locked away in there, but there were so many voices. It would be hard to draw out the right one. This was going to take time, only she had no idea how much she had. Had they noticed she’d left the bar yet? Whoever it was could bang down the door at any moment. Who was she kidding with the slide bolt across the door? She was vulnerable wherever she was, and in the emotional mess she was in, she wouldn’t be able to fight back. Could she even get back behind the bar and get her hands on Rita’s secret? Who knew if it even worked on these guys. They’d seemed like her—flesh and blood—but after the last month, Payton wasn’t taking anything for granted.
The sounds from the TV in the other room pounded through her, and the cheers were like a knife running across her throat, chilling her whole body. This had to stop. Her eyes snapped open and her power pushed hard at the edges of her consciousness. Payton took another deep breath, closed her eyes again, and let it out.
There was one man with his whole body clenched, waiting for that touchdown. Another girl was sitting next to her boyfriend at a table, wondering why his eyes kept wandering over to Rita. Payton jumped from head to head, again and again until she was nearly exhausted. There were simple things, drinks and football, relationship troubles, even financial woes, but nothing dangerous.
Just how far could this thing go? Payton let her light stretch farther, past the bar and the gravel lot, focusing on people standing out on the street. There was a young woman watching the streetlight ahead of her, trying to keep her pit bull from running away. A man stood on the corner, pulling his hoodie tight around him against the sea breeze. His girlfriend had flown back to work at the Asia facility that morning, but he was stuck here babysitting their newest addition. How much longer was he going to be on kiddie watch? It had been weeks since she’d put out and—
Payton quickly backed out of his mind before he started imagining anything in more detail. She couldn’t sense anyone else. It was late and most of the local foot traffic had either already landed in the bar or gone home. What the hell had she sensed, then? Cole had told her that he’d sometimes had flashbacks hit him out of nowhere, sometimes even without a trigger. Was she just having a panic attack? Maybe the girls at the juice bar earlier that day had freaked her out more than she’d realized.
Payton pulled her light back inside herself and opened her eyes, holding her breath just in case, but all that looked back at her were the same four walls of the tiny bathroom. God, this was so stupid. She just needed to calm down and let the rest of the night pass her by without freaking out.
She splashed another handful of water on her face and then walked back out to the bar and flung herself right into her work, pouring drink after drink, counting change, and taking tips. She refused to even look back to the spot over in the corner still tingling in her mind. Still, her hands trembled when she passed every drink over the bar and she couldn’t stop her eyes jerking over to the door every couple of minutes. More than once she swore she saw Emily, Keila, or both in the crowd, but when whoever it was turned around, she found herself staring at a stranger. Every time she went out onto the floor to clean up plates and glasses, people would bump against her and the noise levels in her head rose again.
Maybe this stand and fight was a stupid idea. She could run out the door right now, hop on a plane and never come back.
Rita looked over at her, mouthing something at her over the bar, but Payton couldn’t take it in. When Payton didn’t respond, Rita walked out from behind the bar, waving off her waiting customer, grabbed Payton’s elbow, and dragged her off to the side.
“You need to get out of here?�
��
“Yeah. I’m a little tired.”
Rita looked her up and down. “Ahuh.”
“I’m okay, just tired.”
“Well, it’s only midnight. We’re open for awhile yet.”
“Really?” Payton collapsed on a stool. Crap, she’d left it too late. Even if she could get out of there unnoticed, flights wouldn’t start back up again for hours.
“I can see you freaking out, you know. Is it the noise?”
“No. I just—I guess, maybe. It’s just too damn crowded in here.”
“Okay. Go outside, take a breather.”
Go outside, where no one in here will hear you scream.
“Umm, I think I’ll just sit here for a second. Get my bearings. I’ll be okay.”
“Alright, if you say so.” Rita shot her a don’t-believe-you-for-a-second look and then waded back to the bar, picking up trash and glasses off tables as she passed. Fortunately, the game had ended, but the relative quiet was quickly overtaken with a loud country song from the jukebox. Payton pressed her fingertips to her temples. The bar still wasn’t safe, and her head felt like every eye in the place was drilling into the back of her skull. An ache that burned through her brain started and then grew quickly, overtaking every thought she had.
“Uh, do you have anything I can take for a headache, Rita?”
“Sure.” Rita’s thumb jerked sideways. “Ibuprofen, near the sink in the back.”
“Thanks.” She walked back and swallowed four dry.
Coming back out to the bar, her eyes locked on Cole sitting at the bar, smiling at her. When the fuck had he gotten there? Payton smiled back, but then quickly smothered it. Just seeing him sitting there made her feel safer than she had the rest of the night, but she wasn’t sure if she liked that. If she was ever going to make it, she needed to be able to protect herself. A few kisses and one hot night weren’t going to keep her safe the next time her mystery stalker came calling.
Still, he’d come to see her at work, wanting to spend time with her outside of their morning coffee or after-class smoothies. He hadn’t done that since she’d taken a little dive through his dreams and then royally screwed everything up. Had he forgiven her, if he had ever known? Cole met her eyes and smiled again and a small burst of excitement ran through her, dropping her anxiety levels and the pain in her head.
How did I get so lucky?
“What are you doing here?” She walked over and gave him a hug.
He smiled and ran his finger over her chin. “I just wanted to see you, and make sure everything was okay.”
“She’s been having a panic attack all night,” Rita interjected, walking by her with a stack of cups in her hand.
“Really?” Cole turned back to Payton. “Why?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I’ve just been a little bit jumpy.”
“You want me to stay here with you for the rest of the shift?” His eyes were brimming with concern, and when he pulled her in closer, Payton’s racing heart calmed. She could feel his beating through his shirt and it felt as if hers slowed to match his.
Damn him.
“Yeah. That’d be nice.”
“I can handle things here now, Payton,” Rita yelled from across the room, “if you wanna head out early.” She waggled her eyebrows and Payton couldn’t help but laugh, despite the pounding still rampant in her head.
She hesitated. The hidden eyes were still boring into her head, and she’d give anything to get out of there early. Anything except to go somewhere alone with the guy who was too good-looking and just too damn nice for his own good and hers. She glanced around the bar again and her whole body nearly shook with a shiver too real to be anything but evil. That was it. She’d rather go with Officer Sexy and end up having amazing sex she’d probably regret in the morning. At least then she’d still be alive.
“Alright.”
“Come on.” Cole took her hand. “I’ll walk you back home.”
San Diego didn’t go to bed early. When they walked out the door, there were still cars going by and people walking down the street. Her eyes darted back and forth down the block and Cole wrapped an arm around her shoulder. “What’s wrong, Payton?”
She stopped before she reached the sidewalk. “That’s the problem. I don’t know.”
He stayed quiet, took her hand, and walked her across the street. Then he kept to her right so that she was farther from the road than he was. They walked quietly, and even though their hands were touching, Payton could feel a distance still between them. No doubt Cole thought she was suffering from the same flashbacks that he did, but she still wasn’t convinced. She didn’t know how to start talking about that entire story, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to, at least not with the fire that was still burning in her head.
A semi truck stopped at the light ahead, its brakes squealing and making Payton jump. Cole pulled her in further and tucked his arm around her waist. “Payton. . . .”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
He held her tight against his body and kept walking, crossing the intersection slowly so that she could keep up with him. When they stepped back onto the sidewalk, he paused, looking like he wanted to say something, but then just kept walking. They reached the end of the street and he veered left toward the beach, where they could cut across to her apartment.
“Something’s up,” Cole said when they stepped onto the sand. “You’ve never been like this before. Not this bad.”
“I’m just jumpy,” Payton dismissed him.
Cole sighed and kept walking. His eyes didn’t stray from her and Payton kept her focus out on the water. She hoped it would calm her nerves. Damn it, he was still right there, and she didn’t deserve it. He was so gentle with her, and right fucking there, but she just couldn’t open up to him. What would he think when he found out the truth about her? He’d never want to talk to her again, for a start. Cole had served his time already with crazies, and he’d run as fast as he could if he knew what was swirling through her head.
They walked up the beach to her apartment and lingered out front on the steps.
“Do you want to come up?” Despite everything, deep down she wasn’t nearly ready to let him go. Not yet.
“I don’t know,” he sighed and shoved his hands in his jeans pockets.
“Alright.” She reached up to give him a kiss but he turned his head and his lips grazed her cheek.
“I’m sorry, Payton. I really am.”
Payton’s heart panged. Was she imagining things or was Cole already pulled back from her, before anything had even started? “I’ll see you in class tomorrow?”
He nodded before turning and walking away.
Payton ran up the stairs, aching not just from the pain in her head. What had happened between them? She lay down on the bed, her thoughts lost as she tried to wrap her head around everything. His showing up at the bar was unusual enough, but then he’d been so quiet, so withdrawn. The Cole she’d gotten to know had been making progress, smiling more, but tonight it was as if he’d gone right back to being that man she’d seen that first day, sitting on the beach, staring out into nothing.
She frowned. Why had he rejected her offer to come up? If there was one thing she was sure of, it was that the sex between them had been smoking hot. She smiled at the memory. That was one area they had down. Had she really fucked things up so much that he’d turn down sex?
Her heart and mind flip-flopped again. Everything was just so damn confusing! She wasn’t sure if he’d believed her excuses about just having a bad night. Was that why he’d pulled away? Even if he didn’t reject her outright, having him involved in what was really going on was just one more thing to worry about. Still, alone in her quiet apartment, she could almost feel the evil creeping over her again. Even tonight, she’d felt safer having Cole around. When he was gone, she felt vulnerable, colder. She shivered again, pulling the light quilt on the bed tightly around her shoulders.
If she asked him t
o stay, then she’d have to open up, tell him the truth, and just hope he didn’t abandon her. Another shiver ran through her, this one right to her core. The moon slid behind a cloud and her entire apartment dropped into darkness.
Fuck. She couldn’t do this anymore. She had to tell him.
She just had no idea how.
19
Cole set his alarm for seven a.m. so he’d have time to get a run in before heading to the gym early enough to see Payton before class. He hadn’t counted on his neighbor, who decided that six was the perfect time to blast metal from his surround-sound system. He threw a pillow over his head, but there was no way he was going to get any more sleep. He gave up and started up the shower in an attempt to wash away the grit still in his eyes from the night before.
Payton. Things had been bad between them last night, even worse than the awkwardness of the morning after, when he’d skipped class to see his shrink. He’d given her a chance to open up, to come clean and tell him what was going on, but she hadn’t said a thing. He tried to understand, but even if he could explain away her reluctance, he still didn’t like it. Then again, from the little she had shared, Cole didn’t think she’d ever had someone stand up for her in her life, anyone who’d stuck around when life got hard.
He wasn’t going anywhere. He’d gone to the bar because he needed to make sure she was okay. And so for now he’d just keep doing that, until she got it through her head that he wasn’t going to abandon her. And if whoever was stalking her came at her in the meantime? He’d had years of combat training. He could fire pretty much any weapon and hit his mark, and knew a couple of ways to kill with nothing but his hands. He could handle it, even if Payton didn’t think so.
So why had he left her alone after he’d walked her home? She was safe enough once she got inside, right? Still, he didn’t like the sensation running through his gut at the thought of her alone all night. If only she’d open up to him, damn it. Cole had spent nearly a year hiding away from the world, but he was finally starting to see things clearly again. How could he help Payton if she wasn’t prepared to take the same leap of faith?
Payton (Dreamcatchers Romantic Suspense Series Book 3) Page 13
