by Amelia Grace
As the orange rays of the sun peeped out from the east and danced into my room, I escaped from my bed, dressed in my pink bloom long beach sarong dress and headed to the beach for a change of scenery – the fresh salty air, the blue calming water and the rhythmic swoosh as the waves washed ashore – these would soothe my soul, I was sure of it.
The day was glorious, cloudless, peaceful.
But I was greeted by an overcrowded car park and people everywhere. So much for my private living connection to the Earth elements!
I decided to go and see what the major commotion was about. Then I saw them. The guys in their bodysuits that hugged their muscular frame like a glove, and the racing bikes that looked like they were built from the future.
A loud hooter infiltrated the atmosphere. I looked towards the ocean and saw a large group of swimmers trying to exert their dominance in the water. At first, they were crowded up as if they were a pack of sardines, then as they continued to swim, the strong swimmers took the lead, out and around the orange floating buoy, then back into the beach, where they ran to the bike transition area, put on their bike helmets and then began the cycling leg of the triathlon.
It was then that I saw him. Nic was up with the leaders, coming fourth. His face was dogged with determination.
I watched as he mounted his racing bike and unleashed his strength and power on the pedals to push the bike to the limits. I looked around me, my mind a blur with so many people abuzz with excitement at the event.
So this was a triathlon, Nic’s professional sport. What attracted him to it? Why did he enjoy it?
I strolled through the sporting venue, and caught a glimpse of a large screen that televised the cycling. Nic was spectacular, his athletic body perfection. I drew in a sharp breath.
Nic what are you doing to me?
Then all of a sudden, the crowd rose to their feet and walked quickly to the bike transition area again. The competitors dismounted their bikes, roughly placing the bikes in the racks, removed their helmets, shoved their sports shoes on and ran off at a very fast pace.
Nic, you are beautiful…..I could easily fall in love with you…..
As soon as the last elite competitor had left on the run, the crowd returned to the big screen to watch the competitors duel out the final leg of the triathlon.
After 30 minutes, the crowd rose to their feet and walked to the finish line of the race. Within five minutes the leaders were in view – three of them, pushing themselves to the limit, pain evident on their faces.
As they entered the final one hundred metres, one of the three accelerated, digging deep for the final burst of energy to get him over the line. It was Nic with his white cap and dark sunglasses. The crowd screamed his name, encouraging him on, clapping and cheering, pushing him first over the finish line. Nic slowed his sprint to a slow jog, as he crossed the finish line first and then stopped and turned around to welcome his fellow competitors, shaking their hands in congratulations as they completed the course.
As Nic walked through to the cool down area, to rehydrate, girls screamed at his presence and asked for his autograph, which he happily complied with.
Aah Nic, pure eye candy for the adoring girls….
Then after a while, as he was still walking around, he and the other athletes unzipped their triathlon bodysuits, and rolled them down to their waists, exposing their sculptured upper torso and rippling stomach muscles down to their hips. Nic’s muscles were well built and defined, as were the other athletes. Now, I fully understood why they were called elite athletes, their bodies were at peak condition. They were like gods of sport.
Nic turned around to grab some more water when he hesitated, and then looked to his right side, at me. Our eyes locked for a millisecond, enough for me to be filled with ecstasy momentarily. He looked to the ground and smiled shyly to himself, then jogged over to me.
He was about to stop next to me when the event organizers pulled him aside for interviews and photographs. Nic looked back at me and gave me a hand signal telling me to wait for him. I watched on while he was the centre of attention at the race meet, my heart telling me to stay, my head telling me to leave.
As soon as the media session was complete, he returned to me. He brushed my long wavy hair over my shoulder and lightly ran his hand down my arm.
“Cate hi! I’m so happy that you are here,” he said smiling at me.
I nodded my head at him, still unsure why I stayed. “Congratulations on your win Nic……so….awesome.”
“Cate, walk with me. I’m going to shower and get changed. I want you to stay – if you’d like to. It’s a beautiful day here at the beach,” he said, hope in his voice.
I looked into his eyes, and took a deep breath, then nodded my head.
What are you doing to me Nic? I really shouldn’y be here with you…
“I’d like that very much- thank-you ,” I responded gently.
He looked at me, dropped his head forward and smiled. He was very pleased, that much was obvious.
He turned and started to walk casually through the crowd. I wanted to walk beside him, but there were far too many people to walk side by side. I found myself trailing him, sometimes losing sight of him.
He stopped and turned around and waited for me, smiling. Then he looked to my hand and gently took it in his and walked with me close beside him.
His hand was masculine and strong, yet he held my hand with tenderness. As we walked, we talked, and I took every opportunity to look at his beautiful body. My heart was beating erratically.
Then he left me to shower, and I lost sight of him. Perhaps that was a good thing. Now I could listen to my head without my heart shouting loudly at me. I sat under a shady tree and sighed. As I closed my eyes a tear fell to the grass.
Ben…
My deep thoughts were abruptly interrupted by the announcement of the presentation. I stood back and watched. As Nic stood up on the podium, a loud cheer broke out. He was looking refreshed, and wore a body hugging collared sports shirt and black sports shorts. He looked an imposing figure with his athletic build, and a quiet confidence oozed from him. Nic bowed his head, and then, looked to the sky and pointed up to the heavens.
Nic, perhaps you are too perfect. I come with a wounded heart. I am far from perfect……
As the presentations finally wound up, the crowds closed in on the competitors, and I lost sight of Nic. It was a good thing I had decided. I am not the right girl for him.
I walked to the beach and sat on the pure white sand, and looked out over the Pacific Ocean, finally able to find my connection to the Earth before I returned home alone.
I closed my eyes and deeply breathed in the sea air, the sound of the waves washing onto the shore calming me. It was time to leave. I opened my eyes and Nic was there, in front of me, smiling shyly.
“Hey,” Nic said.
I smiled back at him, and then he sat beside me and looked out over the ocean too. His presence made me nervous.
“I’m about to head back home Nic,” I said, hoping to leave sooner rather than later. My heart was aching for Ben.
“Do you have to go?” Nic asked. “Let’s do lunch….if you’d like?” said Nic apprehensively.
I looked out over the water, considering his proposal of lunch. My heart was filled with sadness. I wanted Ben. But he was gone.
“Yes, okay. That would be nice thanks Nic,” I responded, feeling like I was about to betray the love of my life.
We both stood. Nic walked closely next to me, giving me his full attention, making me feel self-conscious.
“Nic…I feel so…..unworthy of being here with you. Here you are, this super fit, well known athlete, and here I am, insignificant me, sharing a conversation with you, and about to have lunch with you,” I expressed shaking my head and looking at him.
He frowned and looked at the sand.
“If that’s what you feel Cate, then, you don’t see yourself very well at all. You are far from what you hav
e just expressed to me. I consider myself extremely fortunate to be in your company,” Nic articulated, looking deeply into my eyes.
I pulled my eyes away from his intensity, and focused on the sand.
Nic…what are you doing to me?
After a short stroll down the beach we came to a quaint beach house café, situated over the shore and into the water. Nic and I sat out on the shaded deck facing the ocean. I sat opposite Nic. I had chosen to sit there on purpose. I wanted to be able to look at his chiseled face, and into his beautiful blue eyes. His hair was gorgeous. I loved the way his dark brown wavy hair flowed over his head, but was cut short at the back, and how occasionally wavy strands of hair fell over his face. Then I looked into his eyes, his eyes looking directly into mine. I felt dizzy, and so I looked down at the menu. I could feel him watching me, and then I felt him brush a tendril of my blonde curly hair off my face, my heart skipping a beat.
The waiter appeared at the table, and took our orders, and left politely. Nic looked out over the ocean. I kept my eyes on him, admiring his appearance. He was beautiful.
Then he looked at me with his deep blue eyes, and looked down and smiled. I drew in a short sharp breath.
“Nic, how long will you be able to continue being a professional athlete for…I mean, the body does wear out right?” I asked.
“Definitely. You’re right about that. I am supposed to be getting a rub down and a massage right now, and an icebath. After every race, the team doctors and physios like us to be attended to, to prevent as many injuries as possible. Today, I managed to wiggle my way out of the massage. But I do have to report in much later for attention. I can’t get out of it totally. And Cate, I also have a degree up my sleeve for when my body wears down. I studied, and passed with honours, sports medicine studies,” Nic explained.
“Awesome,” I replied.
“And so Cate, what is it that you do for a job, no wait, for you it would be a career. What do you do?” Nic asked inquisitively.
“I’m an interior decorator. I started up my own company when I finished Uni. It’s very successful, not just because of me, but because of the wonderful people that I employ there,” I replied.
“So I’m assuming that you will be doing the interiors of your house,” continued Nic.
“Absolutely, I’ll choose all of the colours, but I’ll have someone paint for me, and I know the best haunts for furniture – I’ve had lots of experience!” I smiled.
Nic smiled back at me and moved his hand towards mine. But before he could touch me, the food arrived at our table. Relief flooded my body as the waiter left.
“Cate, can I ask a favour of you?”
“What’s that?” I asked, puzzled.
“Can I get a lift home with you? I abandoned my team and in turn missed my seat on the bus that we travelled in. So theoretically, I have no way to get home. You are my only prospect of returning home,” Nic said, looking at me with hope all over his face.
“Sure, but there is one condition,” I smiled.
“Which is?“asked Nic, unsure of what the condition was going to be.
“You have to drive!” I informed.
“Condition met!” said Nic, smiling.
After an hour together in the car, we arrived at Nic’s house, where he lived with his parents.
“Cate, come in for five minutes with me. I want you to meet my dog. He’s a lunatic, but very nice!” said Nic.
I looked at Nic and nodded and smiled.
We entered the house. It was old but homely, and many happy memories had been shared here. I could tell because of the photos which adorned the house.
Nic led me to the large kitchen. His parents were there.
“Mum, Dad, I’d like you to meet Cate. She was the reason that our team won the Hey Hey It’s Saturday Tournament again this year. She is an awesome statue partner,” Nic said smiling at me.
“Well, Cate. It’s nice to meet you, and, welcome to our home,” Nic’s mom said warmly, eyeing me over, making me nervous.
“Come on Cate, come and meet Dudley, my Irish Wolfhound. Be warned though, he may jump up on you, or chase you. He usually does that to my friends! Oh, and he is a little on the looney side, but he is adorable,” said Nic with obvious affection in his voice.
I followed Nic out onto the back covered wide verandah. As soon as Dudley saw Nic, he came bounding over excitedly to him, forcing interaction between the two of them.
“Dudley is gorgeous Nic, he has stolen my heart already!” I said as I patted Dudley. Then I heard Nic’s mum’s voice.
“Cate, dear, would you like to stay for a cup of tea? Have you got time Nic?” asked Nic’s mom, wanting her son’s approval of the invitation.
Nic looked at his watch, and nodded.
“I have about forty-five minutes before I have to get out to the physio mom. It’s up to Cate though if she can stay for a little while longer though,” Nic said wisely.
“I’d like to stay for a cup of tea, thank-you Mrs Walker,” I replied.
We sat at an outdoor setting. I felt very welcome in his home, although I knew that the invitation for a cup of tea was actually going to be the spanish inquisition. They were planning either to get to know me nicely, or planning on steering me away from Nic. I didn’t know which one it was going to be.
There were the standard questions like where do you live? What do you do? Did you go to university? And then came the curly questions. I knew that they were fishing for something.
“Cate, have you ever lived with anyone?”
“No, I have lived alone in the house that my Grandy left to me, but I have never shacked up with anyone,” I replied.
“How many boyfriends have you had in the past?”
Nic’s mum was really forward in asking her questions.
“I had a couple at high school, and then one at the end of Uni. He was my boyfriend up until about six months ago, when I called it quits because his job was taking over his life, and there was no room left for me anymore.”
“How was the sex with him Cate?” asked Nic’s mum plainly, not blinking an eyelid. I was completely bowled over by the question, shocked, but remained calm on the outside.
“Mum!” complained Nic, embarrassed by his mum’s question.
“No, it’s okay Nic…..We weren’t intimate in that way. I have promised myself to stay celibate until my wedding night. I believe that your body should only be shared in union in holy matrimony, with the man that you are deeply in love with,” I answered gently, but with conviction.
“Ah Nic, she’s just like you! Cate, he’s the same. I keep telling him that sex is the best thing ever, but no! He wants to save himself for his wife! You two are crazy!!!” commented Nic’s mom.
At that comment, laughter broke out around the table. Nic’s mom looked at me and I smiled.
The forty-five minutes went quickly, I thanked Nic’s mum and dad for the afternoon tea and said goodbye, and then Nic walked me to my car.
He leaned on my car beside the driver’s door with his head down, and then he looked up at me.
“I do apologise for my mum’s inquisition. She was very personal. I’ve never known her to be that way before,” Nic said showing his embarrassment.
“Nic, your mum loves you very much. I can see that. I have nothing to hide, and I don’t mind answering any type of question. I’m very good at handling myself,” I said looking into his eyes, “And, I love your dog – he’s adorable!” I smiled.
Nic smiled and looked down again.
“Ah, it’s time for me to go to physio. Thanks for surprising me at the triathlon Cate – you made my day!“
“You’re very welcome Nic Walker – although, your last name does not suit! “ I said smiling as I got into my car.
I wound down the window, “Have fun at physio!” and then I slowly drove off.
* * *
Immediately upon entering my parent’s house, I ran upstairs and lay on my bed, my mind confused.
&
nbsp; What was I doing? Nic was awesome, but he was not Ben.
Ben ……I choked back my tears, and whispered his name, wishing that he would suddenly appear and wrap his comforting arms around me. But I knew that he wouldn’t. I grabbed the photo of him and held it to my heart. How will I ever let him go? I drifted off into a disturbingly fractured sleep that seemed to have no end.
I sat bolt upright by the shrill of my cell phone. I picked it up, dazed, but did not recognize who the caller was.
“Hello, Cate speaking.”
“Cate, it’s me Nic. I’ve finished physio, and I was wondering if you’d like to catch a movie with me tonight. I’ve got a really busy training schedule this week, and I won’t be able to see you for a while – which could be a bad thing because you split with your last boyfriend because of that reason and I’m waffling aren’t I – yeek that can’t be good,” said Nic.
“No, waffling is good, and I’d like to see a movie with you Nic. What time, and where will I meet you?” I asked, confused about my feelings for him.
“Well, actually, I’m parked at the front of your house….”
I looked outside my window. He was standing there looking up at me.
“Then come in Nic, and wait while I get ready. You can talk to my parents. I have to disappoint you though, they won’t be as forthcoming as your mum was this afternoon,” I said as I walked out the front door and down to greet Nic at the front gate.
I grabbed his hand and took him inside to introduce him to my parents, and then I left him alone with them while I quickly got changed.
Three sets of eyes focused on me as I came bouncing back into the room, smiling at Nic.
“Mum, Dad, we’re off to the movies. I’ll see you later,” I said enthusiastically.
Inside the dark movie theatre, I had trouble concentrating on the content of the movie with Nic sitting so closely to me. I really wanted Nic to hold my hand, but then I did not. I wanted to try to move forward with a relationship with him, but then I did not. I was so confused about my mixed up emotions.
And then I felt him entwine his fingers in mine. Guilt raced through my veins.
