by Michelle Fox
She rubbed her eyes. "What time is it?"
"Late," he said. "I’m sorry, I just didn’t want to go home alone. Not tonight. And I hate the idea of you by yourself after everything that's happened. Can I come in?" He gave her his best puppy dog eyes, which made Midas growl at him again.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Charlotte shushed the dog and, grabbing him by the collar, she opened the front door wide. "Sure. Come on in." Earlier, she’d wanted to be alone, but now that Kane was in front of her, she felt the need for his company. Plus, there was ice cream. No matter how bad life got, ice cream was always good.
"You got spoons?" He held up his shopping bag, the cylinder shape of the pint containers visible through the blue plastic.
"Yeah. In the kitchen." She waved for him to follow her.
They sat at the small table to the side of the large kitchen. Charlotte put Midas in the laundry room again while Kane took the ice cream out of the bag and set it on the table.
"How are you doing?" Kane asked.
She shrugged as she dug through the silverware drawer looking for spoons. "Okay, I guess. I still can’t believe it all happened." She closed her eyes as a vision of the moment she’d taken someone’s life filled her mind. Then with a deep breath, she shoved the memory far away from her conscious mind. With some effort, she forced herself to stay in the present.
"It gets easier," Kane said as he pried the lids off the ice cream.
"Why? Have you killed someone?" She plopped in the seat across from Kane and handed him a spoon.
Kane sighed and poked at a pint of chocolate ice cream with his spoon. "Yeah. My first year as a cop."
She gave a sympathetic wince. "Did it suck as much as killing people because you’re a werewolf?"
"I don’t think it’s ever easy, no matter what the circumstances are. But you get past it. You figure it out and move on." He popped a spoonful of the chocolate ice cream in his mouth.
"What happened?" She pulled a pint of strawberry cheesecake toward her and stabbed it with her spoon. Finding it rock-hard, she set it aside and focused on Kane. Despite the fatigue shadowing his eyes, he was still handsome enough to make her heart speed up. She took a deep breath to steady herself. No matter what anyone said, they were just pack mates, right?
"My partner and I busted a gang member with a kilo of cocaine in his backpack. He was on a motorcycle, making a delivery from Chicago." Kane paused for a moment, a distant look in his eyes. "We missed his back-up piece and he started shooting at us."
Her eyes widened."Wow."
"More like ‘oh, shit.’" Kane chuckled. "Anyway, my partner was in front of me and the bullet would’ve hit him in the chest. I pulled my weapon and shot the guy first."
"You saved your partner’s life."
"I know. And you saved mine today."
She fidgeted in her seat, knowing he was correct, but still not feeling right about causing someone’s death. Picking up her spoon, she twirled it in the ice cream, slowly skimming thin layer off the top.
"It’s true, Charlotte." Kane reached out and covered her hand with his. "You can’t regret saving someone’s life. You were a hero today."
"I don’t want to be a hero," she said, her voice soft. "I want to be a librarian, damn it. I like books, not turning all fangy." Charlotte looked at him with sudden horror. "Do you think...are we going to get hairballs and stuff like that?" She gagged just thinking about it.
"No. I think that's more of a cat thing." He waved a hand. "We're more related to dogs, right?"
She slumped in her chair, struck by a new thought. Something worse than hairballs. Way worse. "Do you know what happens to dogs?"
Kane shook his head and gave her a questioning look.
"Their anal glands get all stopped up, and you have to take them to the vet and get them expressed." She wagged a finger at him. "They stick fingers up the dog's ass and squeeze," she pinched her fingers together, "to fix it. Midas goes in every couple of months so they can clear him out. It smells like rotting zombies."
Kane set his spoon aside and swallowed hard. "I...umm...I'm pretty sure that's not going to happen to us. Tao would've mentioned something about it by now if it was a problem."
"I hope you're right." She crossed her arms and worried her bottom lip. "How would we go to the vet for that anyway? Take turns shifting and playing each other's owner? Can you imagine?"
"We're not dogs, Char. We're werewolves and that's a whole different category." Kane's voice rang with certainty. "It'll be fine. And anyway, we can’t go back. This is who we are now." His mouth a determined line, he picked up his spoon and ate some more ice cream. Swallowing, he said, "You know, I replayed that traffic stop over and over again. It kept me up for months."
"How did you ever sleep again?"
Kane thought for a second, and then said, "I realized it was inevitable. At that moment, someone was going to die, and I made sure it wasn’t me or my partner. Obsessing about it wasn’t going to change anything." He shook his head. "And you’d better believe I practically strip searched suspects from that day on. My partner was the one who patted the guy down, but we both learned to be more thorough."
"That guy paid a hell of a price to teach you that lesson," she said, filling her spoon with more ice cream.
"Yeah, but he didn’t have to pull the gun. He had a choice, and he opted for murder." With a heavy sigh, he added, "The deaths that are going to bother me are those two men the hunter killed."
"It wasn't your fault," Charlotte said.
"Maybe not directly, but I left them there and, because of me, they died." He stared into his ice cream. "It's not a good feeling."
"Like you said, you can't go back. We both have to let it go, I guess. I'm just not sure how." She sighed and poked at the chocolate chip cookie dough with her spoon. Now that she'd stopped thinking about anal glands, her mind was full of the man she'd killed. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to block it out. It was a good thing Kane was there. As always, he made things better.
Kane took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Straightening up in his chair, he said, "I say tonight is the first step forward. Talking about it helps, I think. I feel better at least."
"Yeah, me too." She gave him a small smile and resumed eating her ice cream, forcing herself to think of nothing but eating it. "Sugar doesn't hurt, either."
Kane switched from chocolate to birthday cake ice cream. "Mmm. This is amazing. Have you had this?"
"No, not yet." She looked at the carton with interest.
He held the pint out to her and she took a scoop.
Swallowing, she said, "This tastes like a birthday party."
"Lots of icing," Kane said. "Mmmm. I love icing."
"Me, too."
Their spoons hit each other as they both went in for more. They laughed, and Kane's gaze caught hers, full of heat that made her flush.
Charlotte broke eye contact first and reached for the strawberry cheesecake ice cream. "Do you ever feel normal again after something like that? Or are you forever different?"
"It took a while, but I did move on. So you will get past this. Just try to focus forward, don’t let yourself get stuck in that moment. It was what it was. You can’t change it, and you shouldn’t let it change you. Go be a librarian if that’s what you want."
"And a werewolf." She shoved a huge spoonful of ice cream in her mouth, wishing it could numb the bitterness that welled up inside her when she thought of her future as a werewolf.
"It is what it is. I didn’t plan on spending my life howling at the moon, but here I am." He ran a hand through his hair. "Shit. I’ve lied at work to cover all our hairy asses. It’s crazy."
"I never thought about that." Charlotte gave him a sympathetic look.
"Yeah. I’m keeping secrets from everyone." He paused and his gazed settled on her. "Everyone but you."
"I'm honored, I guess."
"We’re in this together, you know? And," he cleared his throat, "I don
’t want to let you go."
"Meaning?"
He pushed his chair back and stood. Coming around to her side of the table, he pulled her up and against him. "I want to kiss you. I want your scent in my nose, and your body wrapped around me."
"You do?" She gave him a hard look. "What about all those girls in your phone?"
"They were from before I met you." He fished in his pants with one hand and pulled out his phone. Handing it over to her, he said, "See for yourself."
She went to contacts and scrolled through. The list of names had shrunk by more than half. "You deleted them?"
"Yeah." He took the phone from her. Angling the screen so she could see, he scrolled down to W and then to her name, Charlotte Wills. "And here’s where you are."
She peered at the phone screen. "Oh, wow. I don't know what to say. You did that for me?"
"I would do more than that, if you let me." He held her gaze for a second and she had to look away, unable to withstand the desire burning bright in his dark eyes. "I know you were mad about all those girls. But I met them only because I hadn't found you yet. If I'd met you first, your number would've been the only one in my phone."
Clearing his throat, he continued, "I gave you your own ring-tone, too." He tapped the screen and wolf howls filled the kitchen. There were two of them, going back and forth. "I heard about them online. They're from Yellowstone. They've been mates for over a decade and never leave each other's side. Her alpha was caught in a trap, and she not only fed him so he wouldn't starve, she went and found a park ranger to help. She saved his life. Just like you saved mine."
Charlotte’s breathing hitched. This was possibly the sweetest thing any guy had ever done for her. He'd really put some thought into it. Something she'd never seen from her ex, who treated her like she was a pizza he could order in whenever he felt like it. "Thank you, Kane," she whispered.
His hand cupped the side of her face and he dipped his head down until their eyes were even. "Talk is cheap. This is so much better." His lips descended on hers and fire raced from her mouth to sear the rest of her body. She’d always known Kane was hot, but his touch was like an open flame, dancing and licking over her as it burned.
"Oh, Kane," she breathed.
"Shh." He shushed her and then deepened their kiss. His tongue stroked hers, and his teeth nipped at her bottom lip, which he followed up with sucking the whole thing into his mouth. Charlotte’s knees went weak and she pressed into him, leaning into his strength.
After a moment, he pulled back, his breathing ragged, his eyes dark pools of seduction. "What do you think? Can I be part of your plan?"
Charlotte froze for a moment, considering his question. Her ex had never kissed her like that. She couldn’t even call what Kane did a kiss. It was more a brand, one that marked her as his. She could deny it all she wanted, but it wouldn't change the fact that deep down in the dark place where her wolf lived, she wanted him.
It might be a disaster. It was probably a bad idea, but that didn’t matter. They'd been through too much to not be together. Instinctively she knew they needed each other. It wasn't just about attraction, it was about healing and holding each other up until they could both stand on their own again.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Kane groaned as their kiss deepened. He cradled Charlotte in his arms, wanting to treasure the moment as much as the woman he enjoyed it with. Her scent filled his head until he was dizzy with it. His whole life, he'd been chasing the wrong idea of beauty, but with one bite, that had all changed, and while he wasn't a hundred percent sold on being a werewolf, finding Charlotte was a check in the pro column.
She filled his hands with her soft curves, her body yielding to his touch. His ears picked up the way her heart quickened when he reached down to squeeze her ass and grind his cock into her pelvis. That he had that kind of effect on her made him even harder.
He pulled at her shirt. "This. Off. Now."
Charlotte resisted. "You first." She yanked at the buttons on his shirt, growling softly when they wouldn't give way.
Annoyed, he swatted her hands away and ripped his shirt off with one quick jerk. Buttons clattered to the floor. He'd probably ruined his shirt, but he needed her now or he was going to lose his mind. She bit her lip at the sight of him, and then reached out to press a hand against his chest. "You're built like a body builder. How do you find the time to work out?"
He caught her hand and placed it at his groin. "I think of you. That's all the exercise I need." Crushing her against him, he drove his tongue into her mouth, doing everything in his power to lap up every last bit of her scent and swallow it inside him.
Coming up for air, he said, his voice low and ragged, "Get that shirt off before I rip it apart."
Charlotte's breathing hitched as they locked gazes. Her eyes were wide pools, deep enough to drown a man should he fall in. She did as he asked, her hands going to the shirt and lifting it over her head. Save for her lace panties, she was naked.
Kane just looked at her for a moment, reacquainting himself with her curves. The glimpse he'd had of her earlier had burned itself into his brain and he found his memory accurate. Her skin glowed, pale as cream, and her pink-tipped breasts were glorious. He would hold onto her wide hips as he took her, pulling her as close as he could.
"You're beautiful," he said, hefting one breast in his hand. "I wanted you the second you knocked me over. Did you know that?"
She shook her head, her eyes glazing as his thumb found her nipple and flicked it into prominence.
"It's like you knocked some sense into me and I saw you for the first time." He leaned down and sucked her nipple into his mouth, teasing its twin with his other hand.
"I-I didn't know." Her voice came out breathy as she responded to his touch. He could smell her desire in the air and knew a slick wetness waited for him between her legs. His pants were tight enough to split around his hardening cock.
"I'm glad your ex was an idiot," he said, his tone sharp. "Because you were meant for me." With that his hands went to her panties and he ripped them off in one swift movement. Nuzzling her neck, he carefully folded what was left of the lace and put it in his pocket. He'd never done anything like that before, but Charlotte was special and he knew he was going to want to remember their first time together.
***
Charlotte leaned into Kane, her mind whirling from both his touch and his words. When he moved in to kiss her again, she turned away.
"What is it, Char?" He'd been growling commands at her the last few minutes, but just then, his voice was quiet, tender even.
"I feel broken, Kane. What I am. What I've been through." Her voice caught and a tremor shook her body. Did monsters deserve love? Was that even what she was?
"You're not broken." He gave her a little shake and then lifted her chin up until her gaze met his. "Do you know what I see when I look at you?"
Mute, she shook her head.
"You're brave, loyal, and gorgeous. There's no one else I want to be with." He leaned down and nibbled her earlobe for a second before saying, "What we've become, who knows what will happen with that? But what we have? You and I? That's a good thing, and I'm not letting it go."
"Do you think that's true?" She wanted to believe him.
"Yes." Kane pulled her tight against him. "You're mine. And I'm yours, if you want me." He captured her lips with his then and kissed her until her lungs burned and her heart throbbed with need. When he let her breathe, he said, "Tell me you want me. Let me make you happy, Char."
"Yes," she sighed. She did want him. Needed him even. His touch felt right when everything else around her was wrong. It had been that way since she'd run into him that day on Glen Vine's Main Street. "I...just..." She trailed off.
"What? Tell me, and I'll make it happen." There was a deep fierceness in his voice that told her he meant every word.
"Just don't leave me, Kane. I don't think I could bear it." Her heart already threatened to break in two at
just the thought of being dumped again.
He shook his head. "Don't you know?"
"What?"
"Wolves mate for life. This isn't just one night, Char. I think it might be forever." He walked her back toward the kitchen counter and lifted her up. Kneeling down, he spread her knees. "I know your ex hurt you, but tonight, I'm going to make you forget he even breathed on this earth. It's my name that will fill your lips, and that's the only one that matters, you hear me?"
He nipped at her thighs, alternating between lips and teeth. She shivered and gasped as he neared the nexus between her thighs. Before he touched her, he lifted his head to say one last thing. "You're going to scream my name until it echoes in your soul. There will be no room for anyone else ever again."
With that, he thrust his tongue through her nether lips. Charlotte fought not to melt into a puddle of sexual ecstasy, but it was damn difficult with a man as hot and alpha as Kane between her legs. Forever would be awesome if it was full of Kane touching her like this.
He wanted her.
Not those other girls, the ones she knew he'd been with before, but her.
The pain she'd carried since her ex had dumped her evaporated. Kane was right, her ex hadn't been the one for her. He'd just been a stepping stone on the way to finding Mr. Right. She felt the truth of that in the pleasure Kane's tongue sent rippling through her.
Kane was who she was supposed to be with. Her nose had been trying to tell her all along, but she'd been too hurt to listen.
Kane flicked the sensitive bud at her core with his tongue and slipped his fingers inside her. Charlotte threw her head back as her hips writhed on the counter, not caring that she was covering the granite with her juices. She would clean it up later. After Kane was done fucking her senseless.
Reaching for his head, she held tight to his hair, urging him to go harder and faster. Her body pulsed and quivered as pleasure gained momentum. Before she knew it, she was keening and shuddering into Kane as an orgasm hit her so hard it left her stunned and barely able to breathe.
