by M. Sembera
“Well, this is it,” I chirped before sharing, “There are three bedrooms down the hall and two bathrooms. There’s no garage but there’s a shed in the back and oh, the back yard is nice too.”
Smiling at me, he said, “Your house.”
Smiling back, I said, “My home.”
The two of us stood there glancing around, not really knowing what to say.
Breaking the silence, Jackson asked, “Do you need help?” I made a face at him as he started to laugh, clarifying, “With moving and stuff.”
“Oh, um, well I had to buy a lot and it’s being delivered. There’s Sophia’s stuff but I don’t really have anything that’s actually mine except clothes,” I said.
Nodding, he offered, “What about your yard? Do you need someone to keep it up.”
“Is this your way of making up with me?” I asked.
Shrugging he smiled wide, his smile, the one that warmed my heart.
Taking a deep breath, I admitted, “I don’t like not being friends with you.”
Nodding, he replaced his smile with a concerned expression before questioning, “How have you been?”
“Okay,” I said before he repeated, “How have you been?”
With a heavy sigh, I replied, “It was rough for a while but I think it’s better now and it’s almost over so… How about you?”
“I’m good Ren,” he answered.
Giving him a little smile, I said, “I’m glad,” before informing, “I better get going.”
Unable to think of anything else to say without bring up things we had no business discussing, I locked up my house and we headed back to my car.
At the institution, I was a little surprised to find Dr. Chepelli waiting for me. We walked out to the little outdoor area where I saw Ms. Herterand sitting on a bench. I hugged her before sitting down next to her. Dr. Chepelli stood facing me as Ms. Herterand started the conversation.
“Francis isn’t pleased with me at the moment,” she shared before saying, “He seems to think I am fragile.”
Looking up at Dr. Chepelli for a moment, I turned my focus back to her.
Ms. Herterand gave me a little smile before informing, “Francis has informed me, The Office is under new leadership. Now, before you say anything, I know what you are doing. And I intend to help.”
Glancing back up at Dr. Chepelli, I shook my head at Ms. Herterand, saying, “I appreciate that but I think Dr. Chepelli’s right.”
“Rennillia, you may be the head of The Office, but you are not going to tell me what I am capable of doing,” she stated.
There was a fire in her eyes that compelled me to blurt, “Yes ma’am.”
“Now that we have that settled,” she all but cheered before offering, “Let me explain a few things, then we can figure out a way that suits both our needs.” Smiling, I nodded before she shared, “I have mentioned before the difficulty I had after Charles died. The day before I was committed, Erin paid me a visit. She raised all kinds of hell over Mason and I’s conversation. I am aware most people and even she feels she is responsible for my actions after that. Truly Erin is not someone that affects me, either way. The woman who came after though, she did. You see Rennillia, I knew every man that put The Office together. In the beginning, I argued with Mason over it. I warned him about Salvador but Mason could not see past who he was. Regardless, I made every effort to keep my son away from it. When the woman showed up she knew things. She said she knew me. She called me pathetic and said that everything bad that had happened was my fault. Then she said, ‘That type of thing could drive someone insane, being responsible for so much, with so little knowledge. You do know what will happen with your son now don’t you? And all because you simply would not obey the rules. Such a sad reality’.”
“Ms. Herterand,” I stopped her finding it hard to believe. Shaking my head, I asked, “It was Ramsden’s wife Angelina?”
Giving a nod, she replied, “She was right you know. It was a sad reality. When you do things based on only what you want, other people get hurt. On the other hand, I have a feeling you are giving my son what he wants, allowing yourself to be hurt.”
Angry enough to head over to the Ramsden’s with a baseball bat, I thought of a more productive way to give Angelina some payback.
Pulling my thoughts together, I recalled different things about Angelina. The one thing that seemed most important to her was her husband’s success. If she thought she had jeopardized that in some way that just might drive her insane.
Standing up, I looked between Ms. Herterand and Dr. Chepelli as I questioned, “How do ya’ll feel about attending an event?” before sharing, “It’s going to be big.”
Dr. Chepelli pursed his lips and sighed, relenting to Ms. Herterand’s will, against his reservations as Ms. Herterand flashed a devious smile.
After going over plans to include Ms. Herterand at Hert’s going away party, I headed back to the house. On the way, I needed to make a stop. Parking in front the little china shop, I sat in my car staring at the narrow pathway between the two buildings. I wasn’t afraid of HIM anymore and knowing what HIS uncle had done to HIM on top of everything else I already knew, made me feel… Conflicted.
Startled when my passenger door opened, I snapped, “Why do you always pop up out of nowhere?”
“Why are you sitting outside my shop?” HE questioned, sliding into the passenger seat.
Glaring at HIM, I replied, “Technically, I’m sitting outside the china shop.”
“What do you want Ren?” he asked starting to appear agitated.
Taking a deep breath, I questioned, “Are you still willing to help?”
Narrowing HIS eyes at me, HE repeated, “What do you want?”
“Next Friday I will be meeting with your uncle. I’m supposed to be handing you over to him but since I’m not really going to do that, I’m asking you before he orders you to come with me,” I answered.
Staring at me HE waited a while before saying, “One condition.”
I scowled knowing whatever it was would make me uncomfortable.
“I’ve had a few since you left. It’s not the same,” HE stated.
Disgusted, I snapped, “Sorry no one’s as stupid as me.”
Visibly angry, HE growled, “You miss me. Admit it.”
I didn’t have a chance to admit or deny anything.
The passage door flew open and HE was yanked out of my car and onto the concrete. Thinking ‘how in the hell’, I couldn’t believe this was happening. Hert shot me a nasty look before crouching over HIM. After all my planning and being careful, I only had two weeks left and this was happening. It couldn’t be good.
Jumping out of my car, I rushed over to them, fussing, “Stop it you’re making a scene.”
Hert was instantly in my face, yelling, “You shut up, I’ll deal with you in a minute.”
On HIS feet now, HE taunted Hert, saying, “What’s the matter Herterand? Upset she came to me? Again.”
“Shut up!” I shouted at HIM, knowing HE was intentionally making it worse. Grabbing Hert’s arm as he turned back to HIM, I assured, “Just wait a second, let me explain.”
Jerking away from me, Hert griped, “Get your damn hands off me,” before he grabbed my arms leaning down to my face, informing, “I should have listened to Mr. Ramsden to begin with, you deceitful…” until we were pulled apart.
It only took a second to realize The Brothers had joined us.
Feeling Ignacio’s arms around my shoulders, I saw Fiore holding Hert’s arms behind his back.
HE took a few steps towards us before stating, “She came to me.” Then, in a low tone HE said, “I am always willing to accommodate you Ren.”
Ignacio’s voice came from behind me, warning, “Henley, get to your shop before my brother lets Mr. Herterand go and I look the other way on both their behalves.”
HE gave Hert a little ‘told you so smirk’ before turning and walking away. Hurt by the comment Hert had made, even though, he d
idn’t know what Ramsden did to me, I wiggled free from Ignacio and walked right up and slapped him in the face. Hert jerked slightly as Fiore pulled him back and secured him on his knees.
“I apologize, Mr. Herterand, at the moment HE is protected,” Ignacio stated before informing, “My brother will let you go now.”
In one swift movement, Hert was on his feet and Fiore was at his side.
Straightening his tie, Hert took a step towards me, stating, “I can’t believe I trusted you.”
“You can trust me. I don’t know what it looked like but…”
His jaw clenched and he snapped, “It looked like exactly what it was. You sneaking off to see HIM. What did you miss more? HIM beating your ass or bragging about all the things you let him do to you? Your father was right about you, you’re nothing but a whore.”
Embarrassed by what he said and hurt because he meant it, I blurted, “Hert!” wishing he would just listen to me.
Ignacio stepped to my side, saying, “Mr. Herterand, we will not tolerate you disrespecting her in our presence.”
Even Fiore appeared offended at Hert’s manner of speaking to me as he scowled at him.
Glaring at Ignacio, Hert stated, “Take a walk then. She is my wife.”
Suddenly angry, I assured, “I may be your wife but you, Mr. Herterand, are my employee. And I would advise you to be careful who you listen to because I could easily say my father was right about you.”
Hert expression softened as he questioned, “Why were you here with HIM?”
“HE gave me some information, that’s all. Hert, HE was offered up as a trade, as much as I hate HIM I can’t let that happen and you know why,” I explained.
Hert appeared unhappy but I could tell he understood what I was saying as he stated, “I will see you at the house,” then looking at The Brothers, he asked, “Is compensation required?”
Ignacio replied, “No sir, we are well provided for,” before informing, “We need a word with Mrs. Herterand and will insure her return to your house.”
Giving a quick nod, Hert walked to his car before he got in and drove away.
Standing in between The Brothers, I felt like a little kid. Hert pretty much called me out in front of them and no matter what I had to say after that, the fact that he had revealed something that was so private made it hard to look at them.
Fiore walked past me, saying, “Mrs. Herterand,” as he headed to their car.
Clearing his throat first, Ignacio asked, “Would you like me to drive you home?”
“You needed a word with me?” I questioned, still staring at the ground.
“Have you finished your conversation with HIM?” he asked.
Nodding, I walked toward my car, saying, “Yea, I was done.”
Following me to my car, he asked, “I believe a conversation between us is necessary. May I drive?”
Without answering, I changed my direction and slid into the passenger side.
I stared out the window throughout the entire ride to The Brothers house. When we arrived Fiore met us on the porch.
“Mrs. Herterand,” Fiore greeted before saying, “Men like Henley do not deserve protection, you should know that,” then stepped off of the porch and walked to their car.
Nodding after he stepped away, I agreed but what was I supposed to do? I never thought I would have a conscience when it came to HIM but I did.
“Step inside,” Ignacio stated, opening their front door for me.
I stepped in first then followed him as he walked to the kitchen. Rounding the corner after him, I saw the note I stuck under his pie stuck to the fridge by a small black magnet.
When he noticed me staring at it, Ignacio pulled it off, saying, “Fiore trying to be funny,” before setting it on the counter.
Still having trouble making eye contact with him I looked away, saying, “Oh yea?”
Opening the refrigerator, he pulled out a container of orange juice. Placing it on the counter, he lifted a glass from the cabinet and filled it with juice. After handing me the glass, he set the orange juice back into the fridge.
After taking a few sips, I set the glass down and started to walk out of the kitchen.
Ignacio stepped right in my way and questioned, “Do you think I’m bothered by what Mr. Herterand said?”
Shrugging, I focused on the floor as I replied, “I don’t know.”
“Look at me,” he stated hooking his finger around my chin and tilting my head up.
Unable to comply, I took a step back sharing, “My relationship with HIM was everything I swore I would never be. You said I was nothing like her but I was just like her except my father never laid a hand on her. The worse it got the better I felt. I was everything my father said I was and I did whatever HE wanted me too.”
“Mr. Herterand knows this?” he asked with irritation in his voice.
Turning, I leaned against the counter, looking at my fingers as I twisted them in front of myself.
“Everyone knows,” I mumbled.
“I didn’t,” he said before I snapped, “Well now you do,” as I took off out of the kitchen.
Catching me before I could get away, Ignacio questioned, “Does he know?” Confused I looked up at him as he asked, “Your mick, does he know?”
Nodding, I answered, “Yes.” Then narrowing my eyes, I snapped, “And don’t call him that. His name is Jackson and he’s not mine either.”
“Why are you offended?” he questioned.
Giving him a bad look, I asked, “How would you like it if someone referred to you as that guinea over there?”
Appearing irritated, Ignacio stated, “Depends on who they are. I was referring to calling him yours.”
Growing agitated, even though I wasn’t quite sure why, I griped, “Why are you talking to me? We aren’t friends.”
After staring for a moment a slight scowl was replaced by a solemn expression as he replied, “My apologies.”
Throwing my hands in the air, I shouted, “Why can’t you be normal for five minutes?” Without giving him an opportunity to answer, I informed, “You know what? I wanted us to be friends but all I got was ‘have a good day Mrs. Herterand’.”
“I hope you do have a good day,” he stated tipping me right over the edge.
Furious I growled a loud, ‘aughrrr’ and stomped out of The Brothers house.
Chapter 17
Mrs. Thomas wasn’t back when I arrived at her house. After sticking a note in the Thomas’ door, I drove down to my house. I stood in my living room for a while before I decided to stretch out on the floor. Laying there staring at the ceiling, I couldn’t help the over powering urge to question everything I was doing and why I was doing it.
Slowly sitting up when I heard a knock at the door, I took a breath and prepared myself to see Sophia.
“Why are you here?” I asked, seeing Jackson standing there instead.
“My mom’s not back yet and I saw your car,” he replied, appearing slightly disappointed.
With a heavy sigh, I said, “Sorry, I just want to be by myself right now.”
“You okay?” he asked, sounding concerned.
Making a face, I snapped, “Am I ever?” I could tell he wasn’t going to leave and since I didn’t have the energy to argue, I griped, “Fine, come in but I’m lying on the floor feeling sorry for myself so if you just have to, you can stand there and watch me.”
Shaking his head at me, he walked in.
As promised, I laid back down on the floor. I watched him sit against the wall before I fixed my eyes on the ceiling again.
“You know,” he started before informing, “I’m right here.”
Rolling my eyes, I assured, “I know, I can see you.”
There was a long pause before Jackson asked, “What if I promise I can keep us in perspective?”
I don’t know if it was the ‘us’ in his question or the fact that he had promised the same thing before but I lost it.
Quickly sitting up, I g
riped, “Alright Jacks,” before sharing, “I went and saw HIM today. Hert showed up and then so did The Brothers.” When Jackson only looked at me, with compassion, I gave in. Softening my tone, I said, “I thought I had a handle on everything. The situation, Hert, Henley even you.” His look of compassion turned to concern as I continued saying, “I don’t know what Hert thought I was doing but he was so angry. Right in front of The Brothers he told me my father was right about me.”
“Ren that’s not true,” he assured before I argued, “That’s what I’ve been thinking about. It is true.” My eyes felt watery as I shared, “I left HIM because of Sophia but that’s the only reason I left. Today reminded me of that.”
Jackson started to disagree when I shook my head, saying, “I wasn’t happy with HIM but I belonged there ya know. If it weren’t for Sophia, I would still be there with HIM.” Feeling the burn of tears in my eyes, I shared, “I love her so much. I just… All of this is for her. What if she grows up and finds out what I’m really like?”
“What do you think you’re like?” he asked almost at a whisper.
Finding it hard to keep from taking deep breaths between every few words, I replied, “Everything is a mess because…because of me. My father hated me… I ruined his wife…All he wanted was for me to behave…Why couldn’t I just obey…I can’t do this anymore… I can’t keep pretending…” With tears streaming down my face, I choked out, “I just… want it all… to go away,” before I couldn’t catch my breath.
No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t take a deep enough breath and I started to panic.
Feeling Jackson’s arms around me caused my chest to ache even more. Shaking my head, I couldn’t get away from him. He was holding on so tight and I was so sad, my mind started to shift. I relaxed for a moment causing him to loosen his hold enough for me to look up at him. When I did, Jackson cleared his throat and started to let go. I scooted closer as he tried to pull away.
Persistent, I continued until he was all the way against the wall again, asking, “What are you doing?”
