No doubt that was like a knife in his gut now! Just as clearly, he was trying to decide whether his honor required that he keep a promise made under completely different circumstances.
Well, he was right in one respect! Things had certainly changed a great deal! Class rank no longer applied to any of them when they’d broken from the society it had sprung from. He was Tariq’s equal, not his social inferior.
He considered that angrily for several moments and realized that, regardless of social standing, he still didn’t feel like Tariq’s equal.
Because he wasn’t. Tariq could kill him inside of five minutes if it came down to a deadly contest. He would’ve liked to believe that wasn’t so, but he knew better. If Tariq had let himself grow soft once he took his place on the lower council—maybe—but he hadn’t and Koryn doubted it would’ve made a hell of a lot of difference even if he had.
It wasn’t as if he had no idea of how to defend himself. A certain amount of fight training was required of everyone—whatever their station or life goals. He hadn’t particularly relished getting his face, or his ribs, kicked in, however, and he spent most of his time in his lab. Barring the occasional verbal battles, he hadn’t actually had a lot of opportunities to use any of the training he’d had.
Tariq, on the other hand, had been in training or in battle much of his life.
It occurred to him rather forcefully that it might be time to brush up on his battle skills. He and Tariq had already come to blows over Emerald twice and he had a bad feeling that there might be more battles ahead.
Unless he bowed out.
It didn’t take more than a second to realize he wasn’t going to. Reason might triumph over pretty much any other obstacle, but he couldn’t give Emerald up without a fight. He didn’t think he could’ve if she’d told him she didn’t care about him. He sure as hell couldn’t when she’d made it clear she did.
He might not have any other choice but to continue to share her with Tariq as they’d begun, but he couldn’t give her up completely.
By the time he’d finished inventorying the contents of the sick bay, he’d decided that love might just have tainted his reasoning abilities. He and Tariq had been best friends for much of their lives. However possessive Tariq was of Emerald or unpredictable his temper where she was concerned, he didn’t think it was going to come down to a battle to the death and since beating him to a pulp wasn’t going to change Emerald’s mind and Tariq had to know that, there would be no point to it.
Except, possibly, satisfaction for Tariq.
It couldn’t hurt to brush up on his self-defense techniques, he decided, since defending himself was all he had any likelihood of accomplishing. Tariq wasn’t just far more skilled than he was. He outweighed him by a good fifty pounds—of rock solid muscle.
Tariq convinced him that reasoning, at least, was completely sound when he met up with him in the galley in search of food. He hadn’t bothered to dress, proof, if he’d needed it, that Tariq fully intended to head directly back to Emerald as soon as he’d found food.
Tariq looked him over and scowled. “We won’t be needing the birth control.”
Koryn’s lips tightened. “I’d deduced that.”
Tariq narrowed his eyes. “And before you trot down to sick bay to collect a scanner, I’ll tell you straight out—if you come near her with a gods damned scanner I’ll shove it so far up your ass you’ll play hell ever finding it again.”
Anger flashed through Koryn, potent enough that he had to wrestle with the urge to punch Tariq in the face. “I guess that means you disposed of your word of honor along with everything else you left behind on Niribu,” he growled.
Tariq flushed, balling his hands into fists. He looked so furious for several moments, Koryn tensed to duck and mentally reviewed the ship behind him in case he needed to find an escape route quickly. “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that,” he said after a long moment. “If you were anybody else, you’d be spitting out your teeth right now.”
Koryn fought another round with his temper. “She’ll only be fertile three days.”
Tariq looked more murderous at the reminder. “True,” he finally responded tightly. “She’ll probably want to rest a while after that.”
The taunt almost provoked Koryn into tossing aside all sense of self-preservation. He wasn’t certain it wouldn’t have except that even as he tensed to spring, he saw that Emerald had come to the door of the cabin and was watching the two of them.
“You said you understood,” she said, drawing Tariq’s attention.
He didn’t recall saying anything of the sort! In point of fact, he knew fucking well he hadn’t! Emerald had distracted him by embracing him and telling him she loved him and he’d kissed her and lost what little brain function he had left.
“Go back to bed, baby,” Tariq growled.
She met his gaze for a long moment and then flicked a look at Koryn before returning her attention to Tariq. Folding her arms under her bare breasts, she leaned against the door frame. “I didn’t like it when the two of you decided to share me as if what I wanted didn’t matter—which it didn’t—to either of you. I was nothing but a possession. I fell in love with both of you because, despite your arrogance, despite the things you did, despite your complete disregard for my rights as a human being to make my own decisions, I realized that, in your own way, you were trying to protect me … because, I thought, I actually did matter to both of you. I’m not your possession. I’m not a thing. I’m a person and I would love to be your woman—to both of you. Because I love both of you. It worked before. It can still work, but you’ll both have to get past the belief that your wants and needs are more important than mine and that I only exist to be your possession.
“You can still hold me against my will. I’m well aware of that, but you’re going have to decide whether you want to own me and not have me, or have me and not own me. I don’t know—maybe it would help to consider how you would treat an Anunnaki woman?”
Tariq scowled at the empty doorway when she turned away. When the door closed, he flicked a look at Koryn to see what he thought about Emerald’s announcement. It made him feel better to see that Koryn was as outraged as he was.
“If she had a clue of how a woman of the Anunnaki would behave she wouldn’t have made that suggestion!” Koryn muttered after a moment.
Tariq frowned. “She has a point,” he said slowly.
“If she did, she would already have cut your throat and mine, too!” Koryn retorted.
“I didn’t mean that literally,” Tariq said dryly.
Koryn glared at him. “Even figuratively. Setting aside the fact that she’s about half the size of an Anunnaki, does she seem like any Anunnaki woman you’ve ever met?”
“She isn’t Anunnaki,” Tariq said. “Of course she doesn’t behave like our women. Her society was completely different.”
“Exactly my point! An Anunnaki of what rank? Because it seemed to me that she was suggesting a woman of our class and no man in his right mind would chose a concubine of the same class. There would be constant bickering over who outranked whom in the connection and whose decision was final!”
“Gods, Koryn! You confuse the hell out of me, and I don’t need the gods damned headache!”
“You’re confused? I’m fucking confused! What the hell did she mean?”
“She wants to be considered an equal partner. Love her and she will return it. Try to possess her and you will lose it.”
Tariq and Koryn both turned to look at Aeon when he spoke. Koryn couldn’t help but notice that Tariq didn’t look nearly as outraged as he felt when they exchanged a glance. It wasn’t bad enough Emerald had decided to rebel? Now the fucking androids felt like it was perfectly alright to stick their damned noses in where they weren’t welcome? “I don’t believe I addressed that question to you,” he responded coldly.
Tariq shrugged. “I think he put it fairly succinctly, though.” He studied Koryn for a long mome
nt. “I’m still breeding her, though, gods damn it! You can damned well wait until I’m done to scan her.”
Koryn took instant exception to the tone. Fortunately, before he could voice his objections it occurred to him that Tariq had acknowledged their previous agreement and he decided to leave well enough alone. In any case, Tariq distracted him in the next moment.
“We need to divide the cooking.”
He blinked at him in disbelief. “I can’t cook.”
“Well, you need to learn!”
“Exactly how the hell am I supposed to do that out here in the middle of nowhere? There aren’t any instructors!”
“I will prepare this meal and instruct you as I cook,” Aeon offered.
Koryn had to fight the urge to throttle the bastard. “You’re an instructor droid?”
Aeon bowed his head. “I was not given that task, no. I have been assigned as a guard unit. However, I was programmed to perform in whatever capacity needed.”
Even the gods damned androids knew every damned thing they might need to know about surviving, Koryn thought angrily, wondering abruptly if he should have focused his entire studies on the sciences. It hadn’t occurred to him that he would ever need other skills, however.
“You need to get used to not referring to them as androids,” Tariq said evenly. “We owe them our lives. We owe them for saving Emerald when we couldn’t.”
Koryn wrestled with the urge to inform Tariq that he hadn’t had any part in the arrangements and that, therefore, he wasn’t obligated to anything Tariq had promised. He tamped the urge after a moment. As much as he resented Tariq’s arrogant assumption that he was still in a position to order everyone around, he was grateful and it was a meager repayment for what they’d risked. “True,” he said finally. “And I suppose it’s never too soon to get into the habit.”
Tariq nodded and glanced at Aeon. “Bring me and Emerald a tray when the food’s done.”
Koryn glared at his back indignantly as he strode down the corridor once more. “Maybe you need to adjust your attitude a little yourself?” he pointed out tightly.
Tariq halted and turned to look back at them, frowning. After a moment, his brow cleared. “Please?”
Aeon bowed. “I am always honored to serve you, Lord Tariq.”
Rolling his eyes, Koryn stalked to one of the lounges and sprawled on it.
“It will be far easier to learn, I believe, if you watch,” Aeon pointed out.
Koryn sent the android a startled look and then glared at him, but he got up and followed him into the galley, watching him carefully as he selected the ingredients.
“What are you going to prepare?”
“Roast beef with potatoes, carrots, and peas.”
Koryn’s interest instantly peaked. “Great! I’m starving and I haven’t had anything like that in … I’m damned if I remember. Since I left Niribu the first time. I wonder why Lady Selena didn’t just stock the ship with space rations? It would’ve been more convenient.”
“Her servants have said that she prefers the luxury of freshly prepared food to the convenience of her servants,” Aeon responded neutrally.
“Well, I prefer fresh food, too, but it doesn’t keep nearly as well.”
“There are space rations in the hold. She had no idea how long our voyage might be.”
Koryn frowned. “She risked a lot to help us. I hope to hell she’s going to be alright.”
“She loves Lord Tariq. She thought the risk was worth it. In any case, her servants rebelled and stole the ship and left her bound and gagged. It will be reported as a theft and they will be reported as rebels. I’m confident she thought of everything … and she has a great deal of political influence. Beyond that, I killed Mylor, who would’ve been her greatest danger.”
“You killed him for Lady Selena?” Koryn asked, surprised.
“I killed him for Lord Tariq and for his lady,” Aeon said. “Lady Selena’s servants would have killed him if I hadn’t. He was dead either way.”
“Our lady,” Koryn growled.
Aeon sent him a long look, but he merely bowed. “I killed him for Lord Tariq and Lady Emerald because she is also his lady. Also because he destroyed the child and Lord Tariq could not avenge the death of his child himself.”
Koryn felt his appetite vanish at the reminder, but his interest was fairly caught once Aeon began to prepare the meal. “This is a bit like working in the lab, actually. I don’t suppose the measurements need to be quite as precise.”
Aeon shrugged. “It will not blow up if the measurements are not precise, but it may taste like hell.”
“Yes, well failed experiments are always a disappointment.”
“Particularly if it is one you intended to eat.”
Chapter Eighteen
Emerald studied Tariq’s sleeping face, enjoying the rare opportunity to examine him to her heart’s content. Despite their own advances in slowing the aging process over the past several decades, she still found it hard to accept that either Tariq or Koryn were as old as they’d implied. They appeared much the same age as she was.
Then again, they’d ‘resurrected’ her, and her age was as deceptive as theirs. She’d been twenty eight when she’d fought her last battle, however, and she supposed they must have brought her to that age physically when they’d regenerated her. She didn’t see that she looked any differently in the mirror than she remembered.
She’d always found it disconcerting when they called her child, although oddly enough, when they’d ceased and begun to call her baby that had pleased her, because it ‘felt’ like a term of affection. She still thought it was … and she still had some doubts about the way felt about her.
She shouldn’t have. They’d risked death to protect her—a horrible death if she could rely on Mylor’s gloating and she thought she could trust the bastard in that if nothing else. She couldn’t imagine that they would have if they hadn’t loved her.
And yet … could she really trust that they looked upon death the same way she did? As the ultimate sacrifice?
Beyond that, did they even have the ability to feel love as she perceived love? She thought that was the main source of her anxiety, that their society hadn’t prepared them to perceive love in the same way. They both still thought of her as something they could own rather than a person. She wasn’t certain they would ever be able to really see her in any other light, regardless of what she saw as efforts on their part to do so. She didn’t think it was because she was a woman. From things she’d heard and seen in her brief stay on Niribu, it wasn’t any more uncommon for women to hold positions of power and wealth than men ... but those were women of the Anunnaki. She was human and she had a feeling that was a preconception they would never really overcome.
And maybe, in many ways, the Anunnaki were superior and they were justified in thinking they were.
It made her wonder how women had coped with their roles as inferiors for so many generations on Earth when even women of the same class as their husbands were still considered beneath them simply because they were born women.
She shrugged the thought off. She didn’t think it would be any great hardship to deal with—annoying—but not insurmountable simply because she didn’t feel inferior. She also didn’t have a problem allowing them, mostly Tariq, to believe he was the ‘boss’ and his word was final. There were always ways around that and she didn’t particularly care if she had to work around it.
“Now what’s running through that mind, I wonder?” Tariq murmured in a husky voice still laced with sleep, startling her.
She smiled when she focused on his face again and saw the curve of his lips. “I was just thinking that you’re a beautiful man,” she said teasingly.
His face darkened. He stretched and curled his arms around her, dragging her closer. “Insatiable wench!”
Emerald chuckled. “I’m sated. My eyeballs are floating.”
Tariq uttered a snorting laugh. “You’re fortunate your skull
’s intact. I had a hell of a backup that first time around.”
Emerald felt her belly clench at the reminder of his stint imprison, but she was more than willing to do her utmost to erase those terrifying weeks from her mind. Lifting a hand, she stroked his hard cheek. “As horrible as everything was, I’m glad it turned out like it did. If your plan had succeeded I would never have seen you again and I don’t think I could’ve borne that.”
Several emotions chased across his features. “I never wanted to send you away. You know that, don’t you?”
Emerald nodded, tilting her head to brush her face along his. “I know. You wanted to protect your baby. I understand.”
She heard him swallow. “I wasn’t thinking about the baby when I made the arrangements.”
Emerald felt her heart skip several beats. “You weren’t?”
“I ….” He hesitated for a long moment. “I care about you, Em. I know it might not seem like it to you, but I’m trying … to adjust.”
Emerald closed her eyes, relishing the words even though it wasn’t quite what she’d hoped to hear. “Maybe I should tie you up and torment you for hours on end with the most exquisite pleasure imaginable?” she said teasingly after a moment.
He drew back to study her face, but he relaxed when he saw she was teasing. “Believe it or not, that was every bit as tortuous to me,” he said dryly.
She sent him a skeptical look.
“I see you don’t. You wouldn’t look so doubtful if you had any idea how much I wanted you or how long I waited.”
She was inclined to be pleased about that admission and began to think, once she’d thought back over it, that maybe she hadn’t considered it from his viewpoint at all. As beleaguered as she’d been, she’d been keenly aware of his arousal. She doubted anything he’d done to her would’ve been nearly as exciting if she hadn’t sensed that it affected him as much as it did her.
“You can at least concede I wasn’t unmoved,” he said dryly.
Deep Penetration; Alien Breeders I Page 29
