by Claire Adams
I followed him inside, ready to listen and help any way that I could.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Cash
The Same Afternoon
I wanted to confront Hailey about what I’d seen as soon as she closed the front door behind us, but I walked into the living room and sat down on the armchair, which forced her to sit on the couch. I didn’t even want to touch her right now.
“I didn’t expect you home so early,” she said, speaking carefully as she pushed her glasses up her nose. “Where’s your truck?”
“Around back,” I replied in a clipped tone. I’d parked back there to surprise her after I noticed Buck and Lettie weren’t in the corral with the rest of the horses. I figured she and Eric were out riding and I could hide in the house until she came in. I hadn’t expected to see them all over each other right out in plain view of God and the mountains.
“What got you here an hour early?” she asked.
I shrugged. “There were seats on an earlier flight and I switched my ticket so I could get back soon.”
She nodded and then asked, “How was Colorado?”
“That part was fine. We had a good get-together with family from all over coming in to celebrate Uncle Rog’s life. People told stories about him that I’d never heard before. I’m glad I got the chance to go.” The more I talked about my uncle, the madder I got. I’d been away at a funeral, and she hadn’t wasted any time moving on to Eric. I hadn’t thought her capable of it before leaving for Colorado. Things sure had changed in the short time I’d been gone.
“That’s good, Cash.” Her lips twitched, but she didn’t quite smile. After an uncomfortable silence, she asked, “Did something else happen that upset you?”
I stared at her in disbelief. Did she really not know why I was mad? Or was she hoping that if she just played clueless, I wouldn’t mention how comfortable she’d seemed in my best friend’s arms?
“I’m not upset about the funeral. I am feeling good about that.”
Her face scrunched into a frown, her eyes clouding over in confusion. “Are you sure you’re okay? You don’t seem like yourself. What is wrong?”
I took a long time to answer, not quite sure what I wanted to say. I hadn’t liked the look of Eric kissing her out in the yard, but I didn’t know if I should even bring it up. Hailey was acting like nothing had happened. It sure didn’t look like nothing, and that kiss had really bothered me to see, especially considering Eric’s earlier feelings for Hailey. Obviously, those feelings hadn’t gone away.
“While I was away celebrating my uncle’s life, I just didn’t expect to come home and find you all over Eric.”
The careful, confused expression on her face evaporated in an instant, replaced by dark fury, her eyes narrowing. “The hug you saw? Is that what you’re talking about?”
“I saw a hell of a lot more than a hug. Y’all looked awfully comfortable with each other. Who knows how far it would’ve gone if I hadn’t interrupted.”
“Are you serious?” She was angry, but she looked surprised too. Maybe because she hadn’t expected me home quite yet. Or maybe because she didn’t think I’d noticed the way she laughed at every single one of Eric’s dumb jokes and how she looked at him all starry eyed sometimes. “You really think I’m actively pursuing another guy? And not just any guy, but your best friend?” I didn’t answer right away, so she added, “You’ve been gone for less than a week, Cash.”
“I only know what I saw.”
She shook her head, the look on her face getting harder, her eyes cooling to chips of blue ice as she stared me down. I half-expected her to launch out of her chair and start beating the hell out of me with her fists. I’d never seen anyone as pissed off as she looked right now. But her lips were pressed into an angry pink line as she breathed in and out, her eyes never leaving mine.
“I can’t believe I’m hearing this,” she said.
“Tell me you’ve never been attracted to Eric, not even a little,” I said, speaking in a low, controlled voice.
“How dare you speak to me like this,” she hissed, voice even lower than mine had been, and trembling steadily. Her eyes were glassy. “You have no right.” She flew to her feet, but not to attack me. She was headed in the other direction, towards the door. “I’m going back out on Buck for a while. I need to clear my head after listening to all the bullshit you just spouted. I don’t even want to see you until you pull your head out of the horse’s ass where it’s been since you got home.”
She stomped out, wiping angrily at the tears in her eyes, and slammed the door behind her, leaving me steaming on the couch. I thought about going after her, but I was just too pissed to sort through my thoughts. All I could see was her in Eric’s arms and his lips on her cheek. How far had things gone while I was in Colorado?
The phone rang before I could figure that out. I jumped to answer, expecting my parents, who were headed home today too after spending weeks at Uncle Rog’s place taking care of everything.
“Hello?”
“Hey, is everything alright?” It was Eric, which just pissed me off all over again.
“You got what you wanted,” I spat at him.
“What are you talking about?”
“Hailey’s done with me and ready to move on from what I saw when y’all came in from riding.”
“What?” he asked.
“Don’t act like you haven’t been trying to horn in where you don’t belong from the moment she first got here. I saw that hug. You had your hands and lips all over her. I can’t imagine what else was going on while I was gone.” I knew if I had him here in front of me, we’d be exchanging punches again, and over the same damned woman. It pissed me off to be this out of control, but just thinking of Eric with his hands all over Hailey made me see red.
He actually laughed at me, the sound squeezed free of any real humor. “The hug you saw when you were standing on the porch? Shit, Cash, that was her thanking me for being such a good friend to you and helping out on the farm for the last few days. Or do you mean the kiss? That was my way of thanking her for busting her ass while you were gone. I really put her to work. She could be a fine ranch hand now. Do you honestly think I was trying to get her into bed while you were out of town at your uncle’s funeral?”
I didn’t have an answer for that. Hearing it said plainly and out loud like that made it sound ridiculous.
“Nothing is going on between me and Hailey besides a friendship. Don’t fuck this up over you being a jealous asshole.” He made a disappointed sound. “I even told her the truth about me setting you up with a boarder without even asking you because I wanted to get you out of your comfort zone. Why would I tell her any of that unless I wanted y’all to be on the same page? And you should’ve heard the way she talked about you when you were gone. She was thinking of staying even longer than October. At least until you accused her of running around on you.”
I couldn’t even argue, because that was exactly what I’d done. I was too ashamed to admit to how harshly I’d spoken to her. She’d be well within her rights to never speak to me again.
“Where is she now? Packing her stuff and getting ready to leave your ass?”
“No,” I muttered. “She went out for a ride.”
“Go after her, then. Don’t ruin this chance. This girl is good for you.”
I felt like I really did have my head shoved up a horse’s ass, just like Hailey said. “I really messed this up. Maybe more than I can fix it.” He hadn’t seen the look on her face. She’d been surprised first, then hurt, then angry. I’d done all that, and all because I’d seen her hugging a man I’d trust with my own life.
“You won’t know that until you talk to her. Get off the phone and go.”
I hung up without another word and ran out of the house. Buck was gone, but Lettie was still standing next to the corral, tied to a post and wearing her saddle. I jumped on her back and got her going at a full gallop, searching for the woman I loved.
&
nbsp; Chapter Thirty-Four
Hailey
The Same Afternoon
“Good boy, Buck,” I said, steering the horse around a hole in the ground. Eric had warned me more than once that a horse could get hurt terribly if I allowed it to put its hoof in a hole while we were riding. A broken leg could be fatal. The last thing I wanted after such a shitty afternoon was for a horse to die due to my carelessness.
“You’re a very good boy,” I assured him. “Not like some other asshole boys I know.” I rubbed him along his strong neck, his coat velvety soft. We weren’t going very fast at all. I’d been crying at first, but my tears had dried up, and most of my anger had burned off. I just wanted to get away from the house. We drifted to a stop, Buck unsure of what to do without my instruction. Just being out here was helping, all this open sky and the view of the craggy mountains. You didn’t get any of this in New York City. I wondered if I should just plan on heading back there as soon as I could book a ticket. If I couldn’t get out of here until tomorrow morning, I could probably stay overnight at Eric’s. If he didn’t want the trouble that could cause him with Cash, there were hotels in town too. It wasn’t like I couldn’t afford a single night someplace.
I heard the sound of pounding hooves behind me and tensed up in the saddle. The closest neighbor was miles away. This had to be Cash. I didn’t know if I was ready to speak to him right now, but I did know I wasn’t a strong enough rider to beat him in a race. I was stuck here. Buck neighed in solidarity, shaking his head as we stood waiting.
He came up beside me, riding Eric’s favorite, Lettie, instead of his own. He looked stricken, like he’d just been through some terrible ordeal and was worse off for it. That took me by surprise, though I didn’t give him anything but a scathing expression and narrowed eyes when I looked over at him.
“I’m so sorry, Hailey,” he blurted, his features tragically contrite as he shook his head. “I don’t know what came over me. You didn’t deserve none of what I said. I can’t take it back, but I can apologize for it. I feel like a real asshole, and I understand if you want me to leave you alone right now. I just wanted you to know how sorry I am for how I acted.”
He wasn’t making excuses. He was just apologizing straight up. I liked that. I’d actually never had anyone apologize without trying to share the blame with me—oh, if you hadn’t gotten me so angry, etc.—or come up with excuses for why he was acting like a complete and total bastard. I had to respect how straightforward he was being. And I realized I wasn’t as angry as I’d been a few seconds earlier. His behavior had surprised me, as had the fire in my own belly, but I’d had time to calm down and so had he.
I hopped down off of Buck and sat down on a smooth, flat rock nearby that was warm from all the sunshine. I could feel the heat through my jeans. It was nice, being out here, in nature, breathing the fresh air and enjoying the view. When Cash jumped down off his horse and moved to stand in front of me, the view got even better.
“I don’t usually get that upset over nothing,” Cash explained. He hadn’t even had time to put on his cowboy hat, so he looked a little strange standing over me, with his flushed cheeks and the urgency in his eyes, more like the very young man he’d been not too long ago. “And I knew better than to let myself fall in love with you, but here we are, and I can’t stop the way I feel about you. I’ve never felt this strongly about anyone before in my life, and things’ve just gone haywire. Everything feels out of my control, and you know how much I love control.”
He looked so damned upset right now that I had to smile. I knew I’d turned his life upside down, but I didn’t think I’d made things this hard for him. I just couldn’t see anything neat and tidy without knocking it all down, could I, including Cash’s orderly insides? I decided to give him some slack.
“I understand that this isn’t what you’re used to. I’m a mess, and I brought that mess into your house too…” my voice trailed off as a realization hit me right in the stomach, so hard it knocked the air out of me. I blinked and couldn’t speak for a moment, just trying to process what he’d actually said as I struggled to breathe.
“You love me?” I whispered, and the words felt enormous in my mouth. “Is that what you just said?”
He nodded, looking even more worried at the admission.
A smile broke over my face as a warm, tingling sensation filled up my insides, the giddiness reaching all the way from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. I stomped my feet in the dirt, squealing a little like a woman in one of the romantic comedies I’d roll my eyes at and tell to calm the hell down.
“Cash, I love you too. I was so afraid to say it because we live our lives so far apart. I didn’t know if you felt the same way, and I didn’t want to rush things or make you feel uncomfortable by putting too much pressure on you.”
He beamed, all the uncertainty falling away from his face, leaving nothing but his easy charm.
“I was going to tell you tonight over dinner, but I decided to extend my trip for a while, at least until right before the Thanksgiving holiday. I just want to see how things develop between us.”
“I like the sound of that,” he said, still grinning.
“But I don’t know about the paying rent part of all this…”
He chuckled at that. “If you’re sleeping in my bed, I can’t very well charge you rent. That just don’t seem right.”
My body fully relaxed at the change in the air between us, all that tension in the past and the future opening up to us again, large enough that we could both walk into it together, at least for the time being.
“I really want to give us a chance to grow as a couple, to really—”
He held up his hand, shaking his head and silencing me. “Shush,” he whispered, and my face collapsed into a hard frown.
I opened my mouth to protest, insulted by the sudden change in his demeanor, and that was when I heard the rattling sound.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Cash
The Same Afternoon
Panic bloomed on Hailey’s face, and I was trying to keep her calm with the look in my eye, not even chancing a step closer to her because any movement was going to provoke the snake’s attack. The bastard was coiled right next to the rock where she was sitting. I didn’t know how to get her away from it without it going after her. Even my talking too loudly to her might set it off.
“Don’t move,” I mouthed to her, trying to hold her attention on me. If she looked at the snake, she might not be able to help herself from screaming or making a sudden movement.
She was shivering, and her left hand was only a few inches to where the rattler was coiled and shaking its tail. She snuck a look out of the corner of her eye, her entire body going rigid at how close she was to the rattlesnake. She started to slide it away, and the damned thing decided to strike, sinking its fangs right into the back of her left hand.
She shrieked, and the snake reared again. I jumped forward, grabbed her by the arm, and yanked her away before it could bite her again. A second time would be fatal.
“It bit me!” she wailed, her chest heaving with her short, frantic breaths. I had to grab her by the wrist to keep her from shaking her hand.
“Stop, Hailey,” I said in a firm voice that drew her attention. “You need to be calm right now. We have to get you back to the house and to the hospital.” I’d ridden out 15 minutes before I found her, and that was at a good clip. We might not be able to ride home that quickly. It all depended on how focused she could be through the pain.
We’d backed up out of striking distance of the snake while I’d been talking. The last thing we needed was for me to get bitten too. We’d both be done for at that point. If we didn’t hurry, Hailey might not make it.
“Get up on your horse.” I walked her to Buck, who stood patiently by while I helped Hailey onto his back. Her breathing was getting even shallower, and I didn’t like the panicked look in her eyes, like she might start screaming at any moment. “Breathe deep i
n and out. Keep your hand below your heart, and we’ll ride back as fast as we can, okay?”
She nodded but still looked ready to lose it. I followed her eyes to see the snake still coiled by the flat rock. I climbed onto Lettie and brought her around so she wouldn’t run across that damned snake and throw me to the ground in a blind panic.
“Get up, Buck,” I said, and slapped him gently on the rump to get him to come along with Lettie. Once the snake was behind us, Hailey seemed to breathe easier.
“My hand feels funny,” she said in a tiny voice I almost couldn’t hear over the hooves beating on the hardpacked dirt.
I had to keep her mind off the snakebite, at least until we got to the truck. I seized on an idea that wouldn’t be enjoyable for either of us, but it might help keep her focused on riding back to the ranch.
“You ever hear the song Home on the Range?” I asked.
She looked over at me, frowning lightly. “What?”
I just started to belt it out, which actually made her smile, even if she still seemed a little confused. My singing voice tended to have that effect on people, though.
“Home, home on the raaaaaaange!”
Now she was gasping with laughter, even with the pain in her hand and the alarm still not leaving her eyes all the way.
I sang the rest of the song, screaming it up to the clouds in my off-tune voice just to keep her laughing and riding along. We were only about five minutes away from the house, but I didn’t want to risk going any faster. She was getting really good at riding, but she wasn’t Eric. I couldn’t expect her to be able to keep up with me at a full gallop when she hadn’t even known how to ride a month ago. And the snakebite would cut into her concentration the longer she went without treatment.
After I finished with the song, we could see the house. “You know any funny stories, Hailey?”
