Relaxing Emotional Tensions in Our Body
Many people find that their negative emotions subside a good deal when they send love to themselves and others with the help of their healing symbols. However, the final letting go of negative emotions usually happens through relaxing the physical tensions that go along with them. Every single negative feeling manifests in our physical body as tension. Once we have identified where these tensions are (see chapter 3) we simply and patiently have to relax them with every out breath. In that way, we can free ourselves from a lifetime of crippling emotions within a few weeks. By learning to relax the tensions of our negative emotions, we naturally arrive at the unconditional happiness that is the natural state of our being and that was there all along.
Therefore, after we have sent love to ourselves and others, we allow the light of our healing symbol to radiate into the part of our body that holds the tensions of our negative emotions. With every out breath, we relax these tensions just as if we were opening up a tight fist. We can help this process along by imagining that our emotional pain is like a tight flower bud that opens up into a beautiful flower with each exhalation.
Sometimes, we have to focus on relaxing our negative emotions over and over, because our habitual tensions may quickly return if we don't pay attention. It is important not to become discouraged by this dynamic. If we patiently relax all the physical tensions of our negative emotions, we will find that our painful feelings come back less frequently and with less strength. And eventually, they will stay away completely. In effect, doing this work is a way of retraining our body and mind to stay relaxed and happy. To my joy, virtually all my clients were able to decrease their negative emotions significantly and, if they kept at it, to dissolve them completely after a few days or weeks by using this approach.
In order to achieve these dramatic results, we need to become aware of even the tiniest amount of emotional tension and to relax immediately, before it can build up to a full-blown emotion. For example, one of my clients called her feelings of depression “her tsunami,” which implied that her depression came in waves. I told her that as soon as she felt “a tsunami” rolling in, she should relax her eyes and the top of her head, where she usually felt these negative feelings. After practicing in this way for two weeks, she was virtually symptom-free.
Sometimes, people feel their negative emotions in several parts of the body. For example, people may feel irritation in the stomach, jaw, and arms. As usual, we always start with the most painful emotion. Once we have relaxed that part of our body, we move to the next strongest emotion and dissolve all tensions, one after the other.
Ruby V
So far, Ruby had reduced her anxiety from 8 to 2 by slowing down her breathing and sending love to herself and her bullying colleague. I then asked her where in her body she felt the remaining anxiety; she said in her stomach. I instructed her to send the loving light of her healing symbol to her solar plexus and to see it opening up like a beautiful flower. It took about two minutes for her anxiety to disappear completely. This was a major breakthrough, because Ruby had been chronically anxious for years and had rarely experienced moments of inner peace—let alone at a time of conflict with a bullying colleague. I instructed her to carry on at home, to slow down her breathing, and to send love to herself, her colleague, and her father.
When Ruby returned to me two weeks later, she told me that she had sent love to her colleague and her father on a daily basis. To her joy, she felt a lot more confident and at peace with her father. To her even greater amazement, her colleague had become much friendlier toward her. Simultaneously, her anxiety decreased to almost 0. Interestingly, she suddenly had the courage to complain to her superiors and demand that this man be removed from her department. Her manager had long known that Ruby's colleague was a troublemaker, and her complaint was the last piece of evidence needed to take disciplinary action against him. Over the next few months, Ruby's situation at work improved dramatically, along with her self-esteem.
• • •
When we use higher-consciousness healing to remove pain from our body we work exactly in the same way. We assume that our pain is just a form of tension and we relax this tension as we allow the color of our healing symbol to penetrate the part of our body that feels painful.
Relaxing physical tension can also be used to dissolve chronic tiredness (the kind of tiredness that does not come from a lack of sleep). Most people think that they need more energy when they feel tired. This belief is incorrect, however. Chronic tiredness is a state of tension that suppresses our energy. Therefore, instead of trying to “build up” more energy, we simply need to relax the tensions that go along with our fatigue.
Ramona
Ramona had been diagnosed with chronic fatigue twenty years ago, and had been treated with numerous naturopathic remedies without much success. After she received her healing symbol, I showed her how to look for the tensions that produced the feeling of fatigue. At first, she was reluctant and insisted that her tiredness was “everywhere.” Once I guided her through her body, however, she could identify her tiredness as tension in her temples. Then I showed her how to relax these tensions with every out breath with the help of her healing symbol. In her mind's eye, she saw these tensions opening out like beautiful flowers over and over. Ramona's fatigue was particularly bad that day, but after five minutes of practicing higher-consciousness healing, it was virtually gone. To her surprise, she suddenly felt “quite normal.”
Overcoming Depression with a Smile
Smiling is beneficial for reducing all sorts of negative emotions, but it is particularly important for all emotions from the sadness category—depression, feeling low, or emotional hurt. By smiling, we help to jumpstart a positive feeling that will replace our sadness and depression.
It couldn't be easier. We just focus on the joyful quality of the light radiating from our healing symbol by putting a smile on our face. Then we allow this positive feeling to radiate through our being. We do not hang on to our sadness by wondering where it has gone, or whether it had something important to tell us. Instead, we remember that our true being is always happy and joyful, and that smiling simply reminds us of that fact. Simultaneously, we identify the physical tensions that go along with our feeling of depression and patiently relax these tensions with every out breath, as described above. Most people feel depressive feelings in their head, eyes, or chest area.
Working with our symbol and smiling also stops the negative self-talk that most people who suffer from depression repeat to themselves. Instead of telling ourselves that everything is hopeless and that we are doomed to fail, we put our mind on our symbol and a smile on our face. In that way, we can determinedly cut though any of our negative thoughts. It is not necessary to replace our negative thoughts with positive thoughts, because this can be very difficult and exhausting. We just keep our mind on our loving healing symbol and focus on a relaxed and joyful smile, and our depressive thoughts will have nowhere to manifest themselves. We may then find to our surprise that positive thoughts spontaneously enter our mind.
Harriet
Harriet suffered from lifelong depression that had no particular cause and seemed to be “free floating.” She also had many depressive thoughts: “I am failure” (she was successful in her career and had many friends) and “Nothing will ever change for the better” (she had overcome a serious illness and her relationship with her parents had vastly improved during the last ten years). Harriet realized that her negative thoughts were irrational, but because they popped into her head frequently, she thought they were somehow true. I told her that she had to get firm with her negative thoughts and that the light of her symbol was like a knife that could cut through these thoughts before they darkened her emotional landscape. I also showed her how to smile in order to jump-start a positive feeling and how to release the tensions in her chest that went along with her depression. Harriet practiced in this way and was able to reduce her depression dramati
cally within four weeks. As a result, she started to go to a drama group and joined a spiritual circle. This further improved her well-being, and her lifelong depression was soon a thing of the past.
Bringing It All Together
When we first work with a healing symbol, it is useful to spend some time on each part of the practice—visualizing the symbol, breathing correctly, creating bubbles of loving light for ourselves and others, relaxing emotional tensions, and smiling. But it will quickly become apparent which of these parts brings us the most relief. Then we can spend the most time on this aspect of the method. For example, some people find that sending love to themselves brings the most relief; others find that relaxing their negative emotion is the most liberating.
We can use our own inner guidance to decide on which part of the practice we want to focus most strongly. We can simply go with what feels best. Just make sure that love is part of your approach, because this is the core of higher-consciousness healing. With time, simply remembering your symbol will spontaneously evoke in you love, relaxation, and a joyful feeling.
Summary
See or sense your healing symbol in your spiritual heart in the middle of your chest.
While you breathe out, radiate the color of your healing symbol throughout your body and see yourself surrounded by a bubble of love. Love yourself, including all your weaknesses, by wishing yourself to be happy.
When you breathe in, just relax. Then exhale the positive qualities of the symbol again.
If other people are involved in your problem, envelope them within a bubble of loving joyful light as well. Wish the other person happiness and know that everyone who is happy immediately repents their wrongdoings and becomes very likeable.
If you harbor resentment toward your parents, always send love to them as well.
If you still feel negative emotions, relax the tensions that are associated with them.
If you feel anxious, combine higher-consciousness healing with the antianxiety breathing technique.
If you feel sad or depressed, put a smile on your face while you practice.
3
PRACTICING THE METHOD
Chapter 11
FORMAL AND INFORMAL PRACTICE
AFTER WE HAVE RECEIVED our healing symbol in relaxation, we work with it as described in the previous chapter in a formal practice for a minimum of two minutes, twice a day. We should also practice it informally every time our negative feelings come up. In order to achieve lasting results with higher-consciousness healing, we have to work with our healing symbol for at least two weeks.
Creating a Regular Formal Practice
For our formal practice, it is best to find a time when we have enough peace and quiet to concentrate fully on our healing symbol. Most people agree that it is always possible to squeeze four minutes into their daily routines, no matter how tight their schedules. The easiest way to create a new habit is to add it on to a habit that already exists. For example, we can practice immediately after getting up or right after we have cleaned our teeth. One of my clients always focuses on his symbol on the train to and from work. For most people, just trying to remember to practice their symbols does not work.
In order to achieve lasting results with higher-consciousness healing, we need to work with our healing symbol twice a day for two weeks—twentyeight times in all. If we forget to do the practice for a day or two, we can simply add those sessions on at the end of our two weeks. For example, if, on average, we forget half of our sessions, we work with our symbol for four weeks instead of two. All that matters is that we do not give up altogether.
Sometimes, people work with a symbol for a few days, and as soon as their problems improve, they stop. This is not advisable, because often the problem will return quickly. It is important always to complete at least a two-week period with each symbol. If our problem has not completely resolved itself within two weeks, we can carry on with the same symbol as long as we feel is necessary.
Using Our Symbol Informally
In addition to our formal practice, it is important to use our symbol every time our negative self-talk and painful feelings associated with our problem come up. This sounds more difficult than it is. We do not need to interrupt our activities or close our eyes in order to practice in daily life. It is enough if our symbol flickers through our mind every now and then, and if we can think vaguely of the bubbles of loving light surrounding ourselves and others. We can do this while having a conversation, while reading a book, or while working.
Many of my clients have commented on how easy and helpful it is to focus on their symbols in difficult situations instead of being overwhelmed by their negative thoughts and emotions. For example, one of my clients suffered from social phobia. Every time she had to confront a crowd of people, she concentrated on her symbol and slowed down her breathing. Doing this took her mind right off her anxiety and cut through her old negative habit. Within four weeks, her phobia almost disappeared, and she has needed to go back to her symbol only very rarely. Her example is typical.
The earlier we notice our negative feelings, the better, because it is a lot easier to cut through small emotions than through fully grown temper tantrums. There is no danger in suppressing our emotions with higher-consciousness healing. Instead, we genuinely transform and heal them by replacing them with the loving and healing light of our symbol. In that way, our problem is positively resolved.
Sometimes, people feel swamped by negative emotions and feel that they have to focus on their symbols all the time. Luckily for most people, these trying times quickly get better with a good night's sleep. During sleep, our symbol can move even more deeply into our unconscious mind and set things right at the root. In that way, virtually everyone finds that negative emotions lessen—abruptly or gradually—and eventually disappear altogether.
Stopping Negative Self-Talk
It is very important to notice any form of negative self-talk and to cut through it before it can develop into a painful emotion. We can do this by placing our mind on our healing symbol. In order to distinguish negative self-talk from healthy and constructive self-criticism, we can ask ourselves: Would I talk in this critical way to my most beloved friend? If the answer is no, then we shouldn't talk to ourselves in this negative way either. As a general rule, most depressed people suffer from negative self-talk, as do most anxious people. They all benefit from dropping this negative habit and sending love to themselves instead with the help of their healing symbols.
We don't have to try hard to think positively. Trying hard to think positively can quickly develop into a form of inner battle, in which our positive and negative voices fight with each other. All we have to do in higher-consciousness healing is replace our negative thought with a positive image of our healing symbol radiating with love. When we do this, positive thoughts often arise spontaneously. Obviously, these positive thoughts are there for us to retain and enjoy.
We don't have to try hard to think positively.
The more quickly we stop our negative thoughts, the more quickly we will be successful. For example, don't think: Oh, my legs are so ugly. Instead, stop yourself before this nasty thought has finished and quickly put your mind on your healing symbol. This will keep the negative thought from developing into a painful emotion. This is not hard to do, but I admit that, sometimes, it can be a bit tedious—like cleaning up our kitchen day in and day out. But the good news is that our “inner cleaning activities” will become less frequent the more we focus on our healing symbol instead of sliding back into our old emotional habits. It is certainly possible to retrain our mind, and after only a few days or weeks, our negative inner voices will give up.
We cannot really overdo higher-consciousness healing. Even if we focus on our healing symbol all day long, it can only be beneficial and we will never get any negative side effects.
Ruby VI
Ruby (whom you met in the previous chapter) had a persistent habit of negative self-talk. She was born and
raised in a country that sees women as subordinate, and she had lived through an arranged marriage with a violent man. Every day, she called herself things like “stupid cow” and blamed herself for every little thing that went wrong around her, even if it had nothing to do with her. When I told Ruby that this negative self-talk was the first thing she had to stop, she was surprised and confused. It never had occurred to her that she was harming herself by talking to herself in that negative way. However, she made a strong effort to cut through this very bad habit by placing her mind on her healing symbol each time a self-reproach came up. She quickly became better at it. After only two months, she completely stopped calling herself names and, instead, was able to send a strong feeling of love to herself. At first, she felt slightly sad that she had made her life such a misery with her negative self-talk, but this sadness quickly disappeared. To Ruby's surprise, she suddenly had much more energy and she used this newfound energy to train for a marathon. She also joined a spiritual community where she hoped to find a new partner—this time, one she chose herself.
Don't Change Your Symbol
In some of the rare cases when clients have reported that their symbols haven't worked, it turned out that they had allowed their healing symbols to change or that they had changed them themselves. This was the case for Mary.
Mary
Mary had been working on her problem of depression quite successfully. When we first met, she had arrived at 7 on the scale of suffering. After four weeks of higher-consciousness healing, her suffering was down to 1. However, when she came to her next session, she felt dreadful again. When I asked her what had happened, she told me that she felt that her healing symbol had gradually “lost its power.” She didn't feel excited by it anymore, and she found it harder and harder to visualize in its original form (a happy person standing on top of a mountain). The symbol seemed to be changing and looked more like a lonely woman in the rain. Mary had just been going along with this change and visualizing the symbol in its new and negative form. Not surprisingly, she felt worse and worse. I explained that practicing her new and more negative symbol was increasing her inner negativity. Luckily, after realizing her error, Mary returned to her original symbol and soon felt better again.
The Five-Minute Miracle Page 9
