"You've got to be kidding me," he said incredulously.
All those long months of painful separation, and it was because she had secretly been trying to protect him?
Because she thought he was a pathetic bear shifter who couldn't be trusted to protect his mate and family?
His initial disbelief quickly shifted to hurt…and a growing determination to prove to her that he could keep her safe, no matter what threats the Medved clan made.
"They found out anyway!" Nika continued, sounding frantic now. "I've known for months that my parents would try to break our mating bond the only way they knew how! I had to warn you!"
"So if I'm understanding you correctly, you've been pretending to your family that you're not actually mated to me?" he asked, just to be sure.
She nodded, and he saw a flush tinting her pale, smooth cheeks.
"It was working too," she said defiantly. Then her shoulders slumped. "At least until Dimitri showed up at my place and saw that I was pregnant. He said he wouldn't tell my parents right away, but he could only stall for a short while."
"So presumably your parents know about our mating by now? And the baby?" Ash asked slowly. "You don't have any secrets left to hide?"
She shook her head. "And that's why I can't stay. I can't let them find me, Ash. And you have to—"
"Protect you," Ash interrupted firmly. "As a mate should."
He saw conflicting emotions in her face and sensed her uncertainty.
Deep inside, did she want to stay with him?
Hope sparked in his chest. And deep inside, his sleeping bear stirred, in the way it did whenever he was close to closing a deal for his company.
"I…don't know," she whispered.
He smelled her fear, and it riled up every protective instinct he possessed.
He couldn't let her leave. He resented the hell out of her right now for what she'd done to them both. But she was his mate, and she was carrying his child. He would find a way to protect them…and to win her as his mate all over again.
* * *
"I'll protect you," Ash repeated. "And you're not leaving me again." His voice dropped to a growl on his last word, and Nika saw his gaze lighten to green-gold.
During their brief time together last summer, she had never seen any sign that his bear was as close to the surface as his eyes now indicated.
"But—" Nika didn't get a chance to finish explaining why staying here at this isolated ranch would be a very, very bad idea.
Ash was leaning over her. His strong, sinewy hands cupped her face, and his fingers slid into her hair as he pressed her back against her pillow.
Nika's heart hammered frantically as he stared deep into her soul with gilded hazel intensity.
All of the feelings and desires she had tried so hard to push down came roaring up and over her like a tsunami. Waking up next to him this morning had felt so natural, so right. His proximity had undermined the walls she had built up to protect herself.
Now, cradled between his strong hands, Nika felt frozen in place by the strength of her yearning for him. He was so close now that she felt his breath against her lips like a warm caress.
An instant later, his mouth crushed against hers in a hungry, demanding kiss. Nika felt the invisible snap against her soul as their mating bond snapped back into place like a piece of stretched rubber regaining its original shape.
Ash froze against her, and she felt his sharp inhalation against her lips. Apparently, he had felt it, too.
His hands tightened in her hair, keeping her firmly captive as he resumed kissing her. His lips caressed hers with the fierce sensuality she remembered so vividly, and his tongue stroked hers, exploring, teasing, and arousing her.
Heat seared through her, racing down her spine, kindling an urgent throb of desire between her thighs. Her skin prickled as her bear came surging to the surface.
Our mate! At last!
She threw her arms around his broad shoulders and pulled him down against her. The hard press of his erection against the taut curve of her pregnant belly made her arch and press her hips eagerly against him.
The overwhelming desire she felt right now went beyond anything she had ever felt before. Every part of her craved his touch. She wanted him to possess her, cover her in his scent, and fill her with his thick, rigid cock.
The bear inside her wanted to be reminded that she was his, body and soul.
"I want you," Ash growled against her mouth.
"Oh God, yes!" Nika kissed him with frantic intensity as her hands slipped down to the waist of his boxers.
He wasn't wearing anything else.
Ash's hands left her hair. An instant later, she felt his big, callused hands slip under her pajama top and slide upwards over the skin of her waist, pushing the fabric up to expose her belly.
She had just hooked her thumbs beneath the wide elastic waistband of his boxers and was preparing to yank them down when she heard a quick knock on the bedroom's partially open door.
Startled out of the passionate haze, she stopped what she was doing and glared at Raymond Chang. Above her, Ash turned his head and gave the intruder a glare of his own.
The snow leopard shifter crossed his arms, leaned against the doorway, and grinned cheerfully back at them.
"I overheard you guys talking, so I was going to ask Ash how he was feeling this morning," the nurse said with a laugh. His gaze swept over their compromising position, and his grin deepened. "But I guess I don't have to. Picture's worth a thousand words, eh?"
Chapter 6 – Awakenings
"Sorry for interrupting," Raymond added.
He didn't look sorry at all.
Ash rolled off Nika and was out of the bed and on his feet in one smooth motion.
"Who the hell are you?" he demanded. "And what the hell are you doing in my house?"
Her cheeks burning, Nika tugged down her pajama top and scrambled clumsily out of the tangle of sheets and comforter.
"Ash, it's okay," she said quickly. "Raymond's a nurse. Your mom and Dr. Jacobsen asked him to look after you while you were in a coma."
"Coma?" Ash's head whipped around to examine his surroundings.
His gaze took in all the medical monitors in his bedroom, and Nika saw his expression change from disbelief to understanding.
"Shit." Ash's shoulders slumped and he rubbed his head as if it still ached. "How long have I been out?"
"Do you remember arguing with your mother about climbing up to the roof of her house and clearing off the accumulated snow? After Dr. Jacobsen confined you to bed rest so that the swelling on your brain could go down?" asked Raymond.
Ash shook his head. "The last thing I remember is trying to chop a hole in the Ornelas's roof—Justin!" he interrupted himself. His eyes widened. "Is he okay?"
"He's fine," Nika assured him, and felt the relief roll off him. "I spoke with him yesterday afternoon. He hurt his foot—"
She glanced over at Raymond, who nodded in agreement.
"Broken ankle," he added. "He'll be up and around in a couple of days…or sooner, if he gets sick of Mrs. Swanson fussing over him."
Ash's expression relaxed. He rolled his eyes. "Mom's getting soft in her old age. I don't remember her fussing over us when stuff happened."
"She was fussing over you pretty hard when you tried to fetch that ladder out of the barn," Raymond said. "That's when she and Dr. Jacobsen decided to put you to sleep for a few days, so that you could heal up."
"He actually tried to climb onto the roof?" Nika asked horrified.
She couldn't help picturing her injured mate trying to climb onto the Victorian house's steep, slippery roof, and decided that Elle Swanson was the Queen of Understatement. Ash's mother had said only that Ash had not been cooperating with his doctor's orders to stay in bed.
"I don't remember any of that," Ash said.
His eyes narrowed as he looked at Raymond.
The other shifter shrugged. "Why would I lie to you? You were
being stubborn and combative, and your mother told us that you weren't acting like yourself."
"Closed-head injuries are really dangerous," Nika added. "I think Dr. Jacobsen did the right thing by inducing a coma."
"I feel fine," Ash said, sounding defensive.
"Now." Nika thought Ash looked better than fine. "Because the treatment worked."
"I agree. Let me tell you, you look a hell of a lot better than you did the first time I saw you," Raymond agreed. "Let me do a quick check on you."
For a moment, Nika thought that Ash was going to refuse.
Then he shrugged and said in his usual casual tone, "Sure, whatever."
As Raymond quickly and competently took Ash's vitals, she felt her face grow hot.
I should have done that the moment that Ash woke up!
Instead, she'd been completely distracted by Ash's sheer physicality…and the feeling of his lips moving against hers.
Her face grew hotter as she remembered every detail of that kiss. How sinfully good Ash's mouth had tasted…and what she had wanted him to do to her next.
I can't. I shouldn't. If I kiss him again, I might not be able to leave…
* * *
Satisfied that his patient appeared to be fully recovered, Raymond left shortly thereafter.
On the way out of the house, as he was pulling on his thick winter coat in the mudroom that separated the front door from the living room, he said to Ash, "Dr. Jacobsen should be coming by soon to check up on you. Don't go anywhere." The snow leopard shifter's mouth twitched. "And stay off the roof, at least until he clears you for regular activities."
"Very funny," Ash said deadpan, as Nika giggled.
As front door closed behind Raymond, Ash turned to Nika. She braced herself for a stream of accusations and questions. Instead, he just looked her up and down, his gaze warm and assessing
"How do you feel about breakfast?"
Before she could reply, her stomach growled. Shifters in general required more food than Ordinaries, and pregnant shifters even more than that. Nika's body was reminding her now that she hadn't eaten anything since that pair of sandwiches at Annabeth's bakery yesterday afternoon.
Ash smiled for the first time since he had awakened, and it was the sweet expression that she remembered. "That's what I thought. I'll cook you a decent meal, and then we'll talk."
She wasn't looking forward to that talk, but it was a conversation they needed to have.
"Can I help?" she asked, following him to the big, open-plan kitchen with its professional-grade appliances, red-and-black granite countertops, and huge granite-topped island with a sink. Six bar stools were lined up on the side of the island nearest to the living room.
Ash was already pulling out eggs, mushrooms, bacon, and milk from his enormous stainless steel refrigerator. "Do you want to make the coffee?"
Nika spotted the high-end drip coffeemaker on his countertop. It stood next to an Italian burr grinder and a ceramic jar. Her nose caught the fragrant whiff of dark roast coffee beans.
As she ground the beans for a pot of the strong coffee that they both loved, she couldn't help but remember all the times Ash had stayed over at her old Seattle apartment.
In the mornings, they had always prepared breakfast together in her tiny galley kitchen. There, it had been impossible to avoid brushing against him and easy to plant a kiss on his bare shoulder or pat his firm, barely clothed ass in passing. She had always been pleasantly sore on those mornings, feeling light as air and intoxicated with sheer bliss as sunlight poured through the apartment's large, wood-framed windows.
There wouldn't be any accidental touches that led to kisses, not in this huge kitchen. It's for the best, Nika told herself, but her chest ached at the lost opportunities for physical contact.
Stop that, she told her bear. You're not making things any easier for us.
Home. Her bear's silent plea was plaintive. Stay.
We can't. Nika drew a shuddering breath and hoped that the whine and growl of the grinder would hide the sound from Ash.
It had felt so right to awaken in his bed and his arms this morning. In the brief space between wakefulness and the return of memory, she had been feeling warm and well-rested and safe for the first time in days.
But she wasn't safe here, not with a mate who couldn't shift and parents determined to remove him from the picture.
If Dimitri was right, and her mother had already arranged another mating for Nika, then her parents wouldn't just let this go.
Maybe American shifters could defy their clan matriarch and choose their own mates, but Nika came from an ancient Russian shifter clan. Her family still did a lot of things the old-fashioned way, especially when it came to preserving the purity of the clan's bloodline.
No Medved had ever mated with an Ordinary…or a shifter from a non-bear lineage.
Maybe I can convince Ash to come with me. Nika stiffened at the sudden thought and tried to tamp down her excitement. If he was with her, then everything would be okay. Or at least as okay as anything could be with Mama and Papa on the warpath.
But at least we'll be together. And my baby will have a father.
A rush of planning and speculation carried her through the next few minutes as she finished setting up the coffee maker, and the kitchen began to fill with the mouthwatering scents of frying bacon and sautéed mushrooms laced with caramelized onions.
She found plates and cups and silverware, and after glancing at the too-large dining room table, set places at the breakfast bar on the other side of the island. Then she watched while Ash whisked together eggs with seasonings and a generous splash of milk, then poured the mixture over the mushrooms and onions.
When the eggs had set, he grated a generous amount of sharp Gruyere cheese over the giant omelet, then folded the edges neatly before sliding it onto a serving plate.
"Great timing, as always," she said. "The coffee is ready too."
"I can squeeze some orange juice, if you want," Ash said as he carried the omelet, now decorated with strips of crisp bacon, over to the breakfast bar.
Nika shook her head. "Maybe later." She reached for the insulated coffee pot and filled two cups. Black, one sugar for Ash, and milk, no sugar for her.
Ash had evenly divided the mushroom omelet and the bacon between their two plates when she brought him his coffee.
"You remembered," he breathed, accepting the cup from her.
Nika felt her cheeks heat under his intense look. "Of course," she said, feeling awkward.
She perched on one of the stools and inhaled the mingled scents of cooked eggs, bacon, and freshly brewed coffee. Her mouth watered, and she felt ravenous. She wasted no time in taking the first bite of the omelet.
It tasted every bit as good as it smelled, and once she began eating, she couldn't stop.
Ash dug in with equal gusto, and neither of them spoke again until every crumb of bacon and every scrap of egg had disappeared.
Nika put her fork down and drank the last sip of her coffee.
Ash eyed her empty plate with a satisfied expression, then spun his stool around to face her.
"Let's talk," he said.
Nika's chest tightened, but she nodded. It was the least of what she owed Ash.
"First of all, why didn't you tell me that you were pregnant?" he asked, and she saw the deep hurt in his eyes. "I deserved to know."
"You did. And I'm so sorry," she replied sincerely. "I should have found a better way to handle this whole mess, but I was so rattled when Mama called to forbid our mating that I panicked."
"You should have told me everything instead of just disappearing like that." Ash's left hand gripped the edge of the granite countertop, his fingers and knuckles white. "You were trying to handle this on your own, but I'm your mate, Nika. It's my job to protect you, but you never even gave me the chance to try."
"I know." She swallowed hard. How could she express her deepest fear, that Ash would have died trying to protect her?
Separating from him had been painful and difficult, but at least she'd had the comfort of knowing that he was safe, if unhappy.
An instant later, she heard the sound of the thick stone slab cracking. A long jagged fracture appeared along the polished edge of the granite under Ash's fingers.
Nika flinched and looked instinctively for an exit.
But before she could react further, Ash had hopped off his stool and spun her around to face him. He moved forward to stand between her knees, and she realized once again that he had acquired a bear shifter's physique during their separation.
He was standing so close to her that she could feel his body heat through her pajamas. His breath stirred her hair as he leaned over her, every bit as big and imposing as his older brother Dane. He left her no escape.
Involuntarily, she shrank back. The old Ash, the sweet, laid-back, lanky young man, would never have unnerved her like this.
"Nika, you don't ever have to be scared of me," he said softly. His hand lifted halfway, as if he wanted to touch her, then he stepped back to give her space.
He continued, "Yes, I'm really upset and hurt by what you did, but I think I can understand. What I really want to know is…what comes next? And how can I help you?"
She looked down at her hands, which were now knotted together over her belly.
Is this a test? She remembered that Mama used to say things like this, but her words were always a trap. A loyalty test, and God help you if you made the wrong response.
Nika gathered her courage.
"You'll help me, even if I want to leave?" she asked slowly.
Ash nodded and reached for her hands, gently separating them and taking them in his. "But I really want you to stay here, with me."
His voice was soft and deep, and neither his expression nor his scent bore any trace of anger.
Her heart pounding at his proximity and the warm touch of his fingers enclosing hers, Nika watched as he raised her hand to his lips and brushed her knuckles with them. The stiff bristle of his beard was an unaccustomed sensation.
Now was the perfect time to ask him.
"You could come with me," she said and felt her bear stir eagerly at her words.
Ash (Bearpaw Ridge Firefighters Book 6) Page 7
