by Alyssa Cole
She nodded and stepped back into the cloud of steam that billowed out from the bathroom.
To bathe. Lavō, lavāre, lāvī, lautum, he thought, falling back on his verb conjugation to clear his mind. Iuvō, iuvāre, iūvī, iūtum. To assist. Iuvō Salomeh lavāre…
He dozed off before he could continue that train of thought. The lack of noise from the bathroom awakened him. Just as he was about to get up and check on her, he heard her puttering around.
“Feeling better?” he asked sleepily when she finally emerged. The makeshift bandage was gone and her hair hung loosely about her shoulders, but there were traces of red on the poor excuse for a hotel towel that barely covered her. It exposed the marks across her chest and shoulder where the seat belt had prevented her from flying through the window, and the bruises around her neck from her encounter with Alexi.
Julian clenched his fists at the sight. Alexi didn’t know it, but he was a walking dead man. He should only hope for such a peaceful death as being engulfed in a ball of flames.
“Is there anything in the bag I can wear?” she asked. “My clothes are drying. There was blood.”
She shrugged as if that were normal for her now, making Julian feel even more tired. He found a T-shirt that was large enough to be a dress on her and handed it over, turning away as she slid it on over the towel.
He beckoned her to the bed. “Let me check your wound. Again. This is one routine we need to break.”
She walked over and sank onto the bed.
“I don’t think I can keep my eyes open much longer,” she said groggily, wincing a little as Julian ripped open an alcohol wipe and dabbed at her wound. “Once, when I was a kid, I bumped my head and my mom told me not to go to sleep because I might never wake up. What if I go to sleep and I don’t wake up?”
Julian ignored the implications of her question and the ease with which she asked it.
“It’s safe for you to sleep,” he said. “The reason you’re so sluggish is because you’re running on fumes. Your body needs rest.”
Under normal circumstances he would have taken her to the hospital to confirm his exam, but since he had no idea who he could trust or who was working with Bardhyn, he didn’t want to risk it.
“You better be right,” she said, unable to stop the huge yawn that ate half her sentence.
He pulled off the remains of his T-shirt and wrapped another strip around her head to provide cushioning for the injury while she slept.
“If I thought there was any chance of you not waking up, I’d keep you awake all night,” he said.
She lay back against the bed and looked at him through half-closed eyes, her fingers exploring the bandage he had applied. A silly grin spread across her face as her eyes lingered on his bare torso. “Like you did last night,” she said with a laugh, and then added more soberly, “I think I’ve aged ten years since then.”
Julian thought back to the horrible moment when he saw her hanging bloody and limp inside their wrecked car.
“I’d say I’ve aged twenty,” he said. “And so I probably wouldn’t be able to keep you up that way, as much as I might enjoy trying.”
She smiled but didn’t answer. Her eyes fluttered closed, and her hand slowly dropped to her side on the bed.
After setting up a few basic booby traps that he hoped would wake him if anyone managed to find them, he rolled her aside as gently as he could in order to tug the covers from beneath her and tuck her in.
Her mouth was pulled down into a frown, and he wondered if she had already slipped into a nightmare. He turned away, ready to grab a pillow and bunk on the floor, when her hand shot out and grabbed his arm. Her palm on his skin sent a shiver through his tired frame.
“Where are you going?” she asked.
“I’m going to sleep on the floor, zemer.”
“You can sleep here,” she said. Her eyes cracked open a little. “With me. We’re partners in crime now. Partners can share a bed.”
He slid under the covers next to her, stopping when he felt the heat of her body close enough to warm his skin.
“Can partners hold each other?” he asked quietly. The air conditioner droned on. The room was dark, but he felt the movement of her nodding head, heard the sound of bandage against pillowcase.
“After a day like today, yes,” she said.
He pulled her into his arms, mindful of the fact that she had been battered more than a few times. Her skin was soft and smelled of citrusy soap.
“Do you think we can beat him, Julian?” she whispered.
He breathed heavily into her hair.
We, he thought, oddly happy as they wrapped up a day filled with murder and betrayal.
“Sure. Right now we sleep,” he said, barely lucid. “Tomorrow we win,” he added as he sank into the black abyss of sleep.
Chapter Twenty
Salomeh awoke to find herself locked into position against Julian’s chest. He held her close, cradling her against the hard contours of his body. She knew he was much larger than her, but she felt downright petite against his broad chest and muscular thighs.
She sighed.
He must have grabbed me in his sleep, she thought. Probably while dreaming he was with someone he really cared about instead of being stuck on another assignment.
Something niggled at the back of her mind. Had she really asked him to get into bed with her? Everything from the point when they reached the hotel room the night before was a little fuzzy. She vaguely remembered him bandaging her head, and then she had fallen into a deep and dreamless sleep.
Light diffused through the cheap curtains, illuminating the room just enough to remind her what sort of motel they were at and why. She felt a flood of fear even thinking about everything she had been through the day before. It seemed like a bad dream or given her circumstances prior to that day, a worse dream.
When Salomeh had her name dragged through the mud and her livelihood destroyed, she’d thought things couldn’t possibly go downhill from there. But hidden somewhere behind her shock and depression there had been the belief that there was a magic bullet that would fix everything.
She was innocent, and the bad guys couldn’t win. That wouldn’t be fair
But now, on top of her life being ruined, she was on the run from people who wanted to end her life. She had almost been killed. She was sure Marta must be driving herself crazy with worry since Salomeh hadn’t told her much—the less her friend knew, the better. Was her friend safe? Was her family safe? They lived on the other side of the country, but was Birdie crazy enough to go after them?
Her heart started to race, and she shut her eyes against the tears. She was tired of crying, and she was tired of worrying. She decided to focus on Julian instead. Right now, as she nestled in his arms, he felt like safety. He felt like the closest thing to normal she had. He was a liar, of course, but he was nice enough to pretend he cared for her, and he was very good at pretending.
She almost believed him.
She allowed herself to revel in the comfort of his warmth against her in the chilly air-conditioned room. It felt so good, so right, even if it wasn’t real.
This is pathetic, she chided herself, and with a sigh she moved to pull herself out of his arms.
“What’s wrong?” Julian asked, tightening his grip. He didn’t sound like he had just woken up at all. His hand rubbed up her arm in what was probably meant to be a soothing motion, but a spiral of something more pleasant than mere comfort whirled up her spine.
“Are you holding me to make sure I don’t try to escape?” she asked. Surely by now he could give up this ruse and let her be. It would certainly be less embarrassing for her. “I don’t think I’ll be ready to make a run for it until I’ve had my first cup of disgusting motel coffee.”
He shifted but still held her tightly against him. Salomeh felt the latent sparks of desire starting to flare within her, and when he spoke into her ear, his low tone sent a shiver straight through her.
“I’m holding you because it feels good. I like waking up with you in my arms.”
He placed a soft kiss on her earlobe, and she trembled against him.
“But you’re right,” he added. “I don’t want to let you escape.”
Despite how good his ministrations felt, Salomeh curled forward in an attempt to pull away from him.
“Please stop,” she whispered. She was glad he was behind her so he couldn’t see the effect he had on her, how easily he laid her open. “I know you feel bad about deceiving me, but you don’t have to pretend anymore. I can deal with goons and guns, and apparently even grenades, but I can’t deal with more lies.”
He released her, and she thought he would finally let her be, but instead he rested his hand on her shoulder. She tried to resist, but he was so strong all it took was a slight push and she was flat on her back. His other arm rested on his pillow, propping up his head as he looked down at her with those inscrutable green eyes. They were shadowed by the dimness of the room, but she could see the hint of annoyance as he gazed at her.
“Salomeh, listen to me very carefully. I’m. Not. Pretending,” he said, his accent more pronounced than usual as he spoke each word.
Stubborn, Salomeh turned her head to the side, but his hand drifted to her face. He ran his fingertips over her jawline, over her brow bone and cheeks until he had coaxed her into looking at him again.
“Why should I believe you?” she asked. “When you first met me, you lied—”
“I didn’t lie, exactly,” he said, “I just didn’t divulge everything you may have wanted to know.”
“You said you were a consultant for the city,” she said, raising her head to better glare at him. He pressed her back into the pillow with one hand.
“I am, technically. In my position as investigating agent on the Albanian and Balkan Gangs Squad, I have been utilized as a consultant. The task force is located in New York City, and I live…well nowhere, really. Just traveling from case to case as needed.”
“You didn’t tell me you had information that could clear my name,” she said.
He sighed. “That information is tied up in an investigation that has been going on for years. Using it to help you would mean admitting that we were gathering the information to begin with, which would undermine the case. I didn’t want to get your hopes up without clearing things with Yates and Henderson first, which I had planned on doing ASAP.”
She nodded curtly. She couldn’t argue with that logic, despite the troubling implications.
“That makes sense, but what about how we had so much in common? You made up all those interests because you knew they were things I would like,” Salomeh pressed on.
“I had no idea what you liked. It’s not like I went digging through your trash. I was just trying to figure out how someone like you could be connected to Birdie, and before I knew it, sparks were flying. Trust me, that was just as surprising for me as it was for you.”
Salomeh looked away and then back, biting at her bottom lip to stanch the flood of emotion. She felt her throat closing against the words that hurt her but had to be acknowledged if she were to forgive him.
“You only slept with me to get information from me,” she said finally, shame flooding through her. Not at what she had shared with him, but because it had meant so much to her. “Do you know what that feels like? The way you touched me, the way you made me feel: all of it was based on deception.”
Julian leaned down and placed his forehead lightly against hers. He had her completely hemmed in, but Salomeh didn’t feel frightened. She felt hopeful.
Please say the right thing, she thought. Please don’t be just another box checked off in a list of terrible situations.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “Please believe me when I say that I brought you to my apartment that night because I had no other choice.”
That was not the right thing.
“God, did they force you to sleep with me?” she asked, squeezing her eyes shut. And then she heard Julian chuckle.
“Stop acting like you’re Quasimodo. I had no other choice because I’d met the most amazing woman I’ve ever known,” he said. “You’re like a Venus flytrap, lush and inviting and impossible to escape.”
Salomeh scrunched her nose in distaste. “Am I supposed to find being compared to a weird-looking, mucus-lined carnivorous plant poetic in some way?” she asked. “I thought you were supposed to be good at sweet-talking people.”
His face was close enough that Salomeh could see the dimples start to form in advance of the mischievous smile she had first seen on the rooftop. And then his face was even closer, and she felt his mouth against hers as it curved into that grin. She found she was smiling too as if it were contagious. His lips were strong and unyielding as they clung to hers. Desire curled through Salomeh, and she leaned up into the kiss, tilting her head and parting her lips to give him better access. He groaned, licking into her mouth. His weight pressed her back into the bed as he explored her mouth with frenzied caresses of lips and tongue, nipping and licking as if he would never taste her again. Salomeh was lost in the sensation, bracing herself to meet his passionate kisses. Julian finally pulled away and flopped onto his back beside her, his chest heaving as if he had just run a lap around the motel.
“Do you see?” he asked. “How I can barely control myself around you? I’m supposed to be explaining, and instead I can’t stop touching you.”
“Is that an excuse for what you did?” she asked, without malice.
“It’s not an excuse; it’s a confession,” he breathed.
He rolled on his side to face her again. The look he gave her was serious and thoughtful, and as good as he was at lying, she knew that it was honest.
“Sleeping with women for information isn’t my modus operandi. I made love to you that night because every part of you called out to me. Not to be cliché, but for the first time in so many years, I felt something real. Something I wanted more than work, maybe even more than revenge.”
“Are you going to tell me you were a virgin until that night too?” she teased, her voice playful. Her heart was soaring. He’d said the right thing, finally, although she hadn’t known what it was until the words were out of his mouth.
Julian raised his brows at her and moved so he was on top of her.
“Do you think a virgin could make you scream like that? Not to be cocky, but you were pretty loud.”
She laughed, but when she glanced up at him, the expression on his face was anything but joking. No one had ever looked at her in such a way before.
“What can I do to prove how much you mean to me?” he asked, his voice rough.
She threw her arms around his neck, both of her hands laced into his hair. “Kiss me,” she said. “Just kiss me.”
She raised her head to meet Julian’s as he brought his mouth back to hers.
Their kiss was explosive. The initial connection Salomeh had felt during their first night together was back but magnified exponentially by the truth of his feelings. She could feel his tenderness in the restrained way his hands moved over her body. His fingers skimmed down her sides, leaving an electrified trail of sensation in their wake. His hand brushed over her stomach as he pushed her shirt up, and she gasped into his mouth.
Julian growled and then transferred his kisses to her neck, sucking the sensitive skin there as he cupped both of her breasts. He placed a ring of sweet kisses around her neck where she had seen ugly bruises forming when she’d looked in the mirror the night before. He nibbled his way up toward her ear while his thumbs flicked at her hardened nipples. She arched under him.
Salomeh loved the terrain of his muscled torso beneath her palms. She realized now that he didn’t look this way out of vanity or pride but because his body was a weapon. He had used it to protect her more than once, and that heightened her appreciation of it. She pushed away from him to gain better access to the furred expanse of his chest. She kissed trails from the pulse at his throat over
the ridges of his pectorals, lapping at his small, flat nipple. He groaned aloud, and she felt his abs tighten as she kissed her way toward his waistline, but he gently pushed her onto her back again.
“As much I like where that was heading, let’s save that for a time when your head isn’t bandaged,” Julian said in a voice strained with need.
Salomeh wriggled impatiently and then pulled her shirt off and threw it to the floor. “You want to stop now?” she asked impatiently, lust pulsing through her in delicious waves.
“I didn’t say anything about stopping,” he said with a wicked smile. It faded as he ran his palm across the bruise that had blossomed on her side where she had been punched.
“Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you, Salomeh.”
“I’m sure. I want you,” she said. Her gaze fastened on the bulge in the crotch of his jeans. “Definitely sure,” she added.
He gave her a quick kiss on the lips and then focused his attention on her nipples. He nipped at one before sucking it into his mouth, his tongue lavishing it with attention.
Salomeh began to rock under him as the pleasure filtered from his mouth and spread through her body. Julian smoothed his hand up her thighs, his index and middle finger finding their mark. Salomeh cried out. His hands were calloused and had touched her enough now that she knew the particular feel and weight of them. The familiarity, the knowledge that it was Julian, her Julian, massaging her clit, made it a million times more erotic. His tongue flicked roughly at her breast as his fingers made slick little motions between her legs.
“Oh,” she whispered, barely able to speak as little shocks of pleasure forced her body to jerk this way and that. “Julian…”
“Yes, zemer?” he asked before nipping at her collarbone. She shuddered at the contact.
“Are you ever going to tell me what zemer means?” she asked.
“The last lie I have to clear up. It doesn’t mean warrior princess,” he said as he lifted away from her to tug off his pants and underwear. He slid back between her legs, and Salomeh could feel the heat of his heavy cock against her thigh. She clutched at his shoulders, holding him as she positioned her clenching pussy near his length.
