She shrugs. “He’s…doing what he has to do to move on.”
“Hey. You must be Celeste. I’m Rose.” Rose joins us in the entry way. I can’t seem to pay attention to what they’re saying though. All I can think about is what Celeste said. He’s doing what he has to do to move on? If he’s moving on, that means there was something to move on from. Maybe I wasn’t just some pastime for him. I need to dig deeper before jumping to conclusions. Maybe she was referring to Milly—maybe he’s doing what he needs to do to make sure she’s taken care of now that I’m gone.
“Time for wine,” Rose says, grabbing ahold of my arm and pulling me out of my thoughts.
We head into the kitchen, and Rose uncorks the bottle and pours wine into the three glasses. The three of us hold them in the air.
“To Brennan and her new place, her new life,” Rose says.
We clink our glasses together and I take a sip.
The wine is sweet and goes down easily.
“Let’s get some music going,” Rose says, leaving the kitchen to turn the radio on in the living room.
“So, how are things for you?” Celeste asks, sipping her wine.
I take a deep breath and shake my head. “I mean, I got my own place. Still need a job though. I turned in my application for the doctor’s office. Keep your fingers crossed.” I don’t mean to sound sarcastic, but I do.
“You miss him,” she says, reading me too well.
My head dips forward. “You have no idea.”
“Why don’t you go to him?” She’s wearing a wide smile.
I shake my head. “I just can’t. My dad is still upset about our relationship. He says that Colton should’ve been a man and talked to him instead of lying to him about us. But, honestly, I still don’t even know how Colton feels about me. I mean, what if I was just a pastime for him? We never talked about our future, and we never even talked about what we were doing. When we were together, we just got lost in each other, you know? He means something to me, but do I mean anything to him? If I did, wouldn’t he come for me and refuse to let me go?”
She opens her mouth, but Rose is back, music now blaring loudly.
“Good thing you don’t have any neighbors yet,” she shouts over the music.
Rose grabs ahold of my hand and pulls me to my feet. “Come on. Dance, celebrate!”
I tug Celeste up with me, and the three of us dance along to the music, laughing, cheering, and drinking.
An hour later, Celeste pulls her phone from her pocket. “Come on, selfie time!”
The three of us group together for a picture before sitting back down and pouring another glass of wine. I’ve had enough now that everything is funny and I’m genuinely having a good time. All the sad thoughts have passed. Suddenly, I understand why so many people turn to alcohol. It’s a way to forget, even if only for a little while. While the sadness is still there deep down, it’s been drowned out for the moment, and that’s all I can ask for. An escape.
The three of us talk and drink and laugh for hours. It’s nearing midnight when Rose leaves the room again.
“You know he loves you, right?” Celeste says, pulling my attention away from my wine.
My head pops up. “How do you know that?”
She smiles. “I just know. You haven’t seen him since you left. He’s gone right back to old, grumpy Colton.”
“Then why hasn’t he called me? Came for me?”
“He thinks if he does, it will only make things harder for you. He doesn’t want you to have to choose between him and your family. He’s making the decision for you.”
Her words do make me feel a little better, but they also confuse me further. I mean, if he does love me, I still have a choice to make: him or respecting my father’s wishes. Maybe my mom was right. Maybe I do need to talk to my dad and explain. I also need to think about what I want out of life. Colton is settled. He has a business here; he has a daughter. He’s not the pack up and move across the country type because he needs a change of pace. Do I want to settle down in this town, or do I want to get out, find a life elsewhere?
I’m a little hungover when I wake in the morning. I drag myself from bed to the shower. Stepping beneath the hot flow of water wakes me up instantly, but it also carries me back in time, to a time when I was pressed against a shower wall with Colton exploring my body unabashedly. My skin heats up with the memory. A flood of desire washes over my body and brings it to life. That’s when I realize that I don’t care what’s out there. All I need in my life are Colton and Milly.
I wash quickly then get out and pull on some clothes. As I’m leaving the apartment, my phone rings.
“Hello?” I answer the strange number.
“Hello, is this Brennan Crawford?” a man asks.
“Yes, it is. Who is this?”
“This is Dr. Clark. I was just looking over your resume here.”
“Oh, that’s great.”
“I believe I know your mother, Diana Crawford? She’s a patient of mine.”
“Yes, that’s right. She was the one that told me you were looking for a receptionist.”
“She sure is a great woman, and she’s always bragging on her talented daughter.”
I laugh. “Yeah, that sounds like my mama.”
“Well, listen. I’d really like to bring you on full-time if you’re still interested.”
“Yes, that would be great. When would I start?”
“How’d tomorrow? Eight a.m.?”
“Perfect. Thank you.”
“Thank you. Have a good day and I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Thanks again. Bye.” I hang up the phone and slide it into my pocket. This gives me hope. Maybe things are starting to fall into place. Maybe my dad will actually listen to me, hear me.
It only takes me a few minute to drive out to my parents’ house. When I park under the tree, I find my dad walking his horse out of the barn. I climb out of the car and walk over.
“Care if I join ya?” I ask, looking up at him as he climbs onto the horse.
He shoots me a grin. “Come on.”
I go into the barn and saddle Butter up. I walk her out, talking to her and running my hand over her shiny coat. Climbing up into the saddle, we start heading toward the fields.
“How’s the new place?” Dad asks.
“Good. I like it. And I was offered the job at Mom’s doctor’s office today too. I start tomorrow.”
He nods. “Good. I knew you’d get everything figured out.”
“Dad?”
“Hmm?”
“I haven’t gotten everything figured out,” I confess.
“What do you mean?”
“Colton,” I breathe out.
He shakes his head and lets out a long breath. “Brennan.”
“I’m sorry, Dad. I’ve been trying. I just can’t get him out of my head. When something good happens, like getting my place and getting this job, he’s the first person I want to tell. When I’m alone, he’s the only person I want sitting next to me. I wish I could say that I’ve forgotten all about him, Dad, but…I think I love him,” I confess.
“Damnit, Brennan.” He shakes his head.
“I know,” I mumble. “I just wish you could see him the way I see him. He’s not as bad as you think. He’s a good man. He runs his own business, he takes care of his daughter. He treats me well, Daddy. I know he loves me, and I know he would take care of me. That’s all you should want, isn’t it?” I turn my head away and look out over the property. The grass is tall and is blowing in the breeze. The sun, high in the sky. It’s a cloudless day, warm and balmy. Wildflowers of all different colors paint the land ahead. It’s so beautiful out here, it’s like a dream.
“I don’t know what you want me to say, Brennan.”
I look back over at him. “I just want you to say that you love me, and that you support me in any decisions that I will make. That it’s okay to love him, to be with him, and that you won’t punish me for it.”
He does
n’t reply, but I can tell that he’s lost in thought as we pick up speed and gallop across the land.
Dad and I stay out on our horses until late afternoon. We don’t talk about anything serious again. I’ve said my piece on the matter, and I know better than to push him for a response. He’ll talk to me when he knows exactly what it is he wants to say. My dad has always been that way. The more you push, the more he’ll pull away. When he’s ready, he’ll come to you.
The two of us put our horses in the stalls and walk out of the barn. I lean in and give my dad a hug. “I’ll talk to you later, Dad.” I start walking away, but he calls after me.
“Brennan.”
I turn. “Yeah?”
“I do want you to be happy.”
Twenty-Three
Colton
I wake with someone knocking on the door. I get off the couch and answer it, finding Celeste on the other side.
“Hey,” I mumble, straining my eyes against the bright, morning sun.
“Can I come in?” she asks, bright-eyed and dressed nicely for work.
“Ugh, yeah.” I open the door wider.
She walks into the house and stops in the living room. She turns to face me. “So, I went to Brennan’s last night.”
“Yeah, I know,” I say, flopping back onto the couch.
“The topic of the two of you came up.”
“And?” I’m still too sleepy for this. “Spit it out.”
“And…she loves you. And you love her—I know you love her. So, go get her!”
I shake my head. “It’s not that simple, Celeste.”
She drops down onto the couch. “Why isn’t it?”
“You know why. Her dad punched me in the face and literally dragged her out of here. I won’t make her choose between me and her family.”
She shakes her head. “Her dad isn’t happy about the two of you, but she said that he was disappointed because you lied to him instead of just coming clean and telling him how you felt. Don’t you see?”
I arch my brow and shake my head. Maybe I shouldn’t have stayed up so late and drank so much last night.
“All you have to do is go to her dad. Tell him how you feel. Ask for his blessing. Then you two can get back together and be happy and in love. Maybe one day get married and have a child together, make Milly a big sister!”
“I don’t think it’ll be that easy,” I argue.
“Maybe it will. It’s worth a shot, right?”
She’s right. Even if it won’t work, it is worth a shot. I’ll do anything for her. That includes going to her father and bearing my heart and soul. I might take another shot to the face, but that’s okay too. My face will heal. My heart never will, not without her.
I’m so lost in thought that I don’t even notice when Celeste gets up. She comes walking back out with Milly. “I’ll take her to the office with me. Go. Go get our girl!”
I spring up from my place on the couch and rush to my room. I’m sure I still stink of booze and bad decisions, so I jump in the shower and wash off quickly. I brush my teeth and use mouthwash. I shave, put on deodorant, and cologne. I pull on some clean clothes and comb my hair. I look more presentable than I have all week. When I walk out of the bedroom, Celeste and Milly are already gone.
I grab my keys and head for the truck. I drive through town slowly, trying to think over all the things I want to say. I need to make him understand. I wish I knew the man personally. Then, I may be able to come up with something a little better than that I love her. Realizing that I’m empty-handed, I swing by the brewery.
Drake is just stepping off the elevator as I’m walking in. “Hey, man. What’s going on?”
“I need a bottle.”
He frowns. “Okay, come on.” He leads me back to the warehouse. “What’s this about?”
“I’m going to get her back,” I tell him.
“That’s great, but Brennan doesn’t strike me as the whiskey type.” He opens a box and hands me a bottle.
“It’s for her dad. I’m going to go ask him for her hand.”
“Whoa! Like, to get married?”
I nod. “Absolutely.”
He’s smiling but seems more shocked and confused than anything. “Have you thought this through? I mean, you two weren’t together for very long, and she’s so young. She’s probably not even thinking about marriage yet.”
I nod. “I’ve thought it through.” I pull a box from my pocket and hand it over. He opens it and looks down at the ring that used to belong to our mother. Being the oldest, it was given to me when she passed. “This last week without her has been hell, Drake. I can’t go on like this. I need her with me. There’s no point in going on if she isn’t.”
He snaps the box closed and hands it over. “I know how you feel,” he says, reaching into his own pocket and pulling out a box. He hands it over with a smile.
I take it and open it, looking down at the ring he’s bought for Celeste. “You’re proposing?”
He smiles and nods. “As soon as the moment is right.”
I laugh and hand the box back. “I never thought the two of us would be here.”
He wraps his arm over my shoulder and leads me back to the elevator. “Me neither, but I’m sure glad we are.”
It doesn’t take me long before I’m parking my truck outside of Brennan’s parents’ house. I grab the bottle out of the passenger seat and exit the truck, slamming the door behind me. Her dad steps out of the barn with a shotgun in his hands.
His dark eyes meet mine. “What in the hell are you doing here?” he asks, propping the gun against his shoulder, barrel pointing upward.
“I come bearing gifts,” I say, showing him the bottle of whiskey.
His eyes move from mine to my hand and back. Finally, he nods towards the barn. “Follow me.”
He leads me up the stairs to the loft. In the center of the floor is a round table with four chairs.
“Have a seat,” he says, opening a small cabinet above a sink and pulling out two glasses. He sits across from me, setting the glasses in the middle.
I glance around the loft, “Is this where Nate was living? Can I ask what happened with him?”
He shakes his head, “Let’s just say that boy won’t be coming around here ever again. Just put a little fear of God in that prick.” I chuckle silently to myself and let the matter go.
I open the bottle and pour a little in both. “You tried this yet?” I ask, motioning toward the whiskey.
“Nope. My wife and doctor are against me and try to keep me whiskey free. This is our little secret,” he says, leaning inward.
I chuckle but push his glass closer. We raise them to our lips at the same time, both of us finishing our drinks off in one swallow.
“Smooth,” he says, grabbing the bottle and pouring us both another shot.
“I’m guessing you know why I’m here,” I say, picking up the glass and swirling the liquid.
“I reckon it has something to do with my daughter,” he replies.
I nod. “That’s right.” I toss my shot back and he does the same.
“Let’s hear it. I’ve heard her side. Now, it’s your turn.” He pours two more shots.
“I know what you think of my family, and I can only guess what you think of me, but you can take my word for it when I say that your daughter is the most important thing to me. I admit, the way we went about it was wrong and stupid and reckless, but our intentions are good. We were pulled together by some unseen force that neither of us could resist. I love your daughter, sir. I can’t go on any longer without her.”
He tips his glass back. “My daughter deserves more than you.”
“I agree. But if there is one thing I can promise, it’s that I’ll always love her and take care of her. I’ll always treat her with respect.”
He nods his head as he thinks over my words. “Did you know I’m ten years older than my wife?” he asks, leaning back.
“I didn’t.”
He nods
. “When I saw her for the first time, I was walking into a feed store in town. I’d just taken over this land for my granddaddy. My father never was much on the country life. My mother passed away when I was young, and my daddy took off, leaving me to be raised by my grandparents. I was raised right. I worked this farm with my granddad when I wasn’t in school, and instead of joining the military or going to college like all my friends, I stuck around, knowing that he’d lose this place without me. Anyway, she was seventeen the first time I laid eyes on her. She was at the feed store with her father. I had just turned twenty-seven—old enough to know better. I didn’t know how old she was at the time, but I could tell she was much younger than I was. When I saw her, it felt like I’d been struck by lightning.”
He laughs and shakes his head. “Her eyes met mine and I saw the way her breath got stuck in her lungs. Her cheeks turned pink and she smiled at me. I knew that day that she’d be mine, and I didn’t care how long I had to wait. She was still in school at the time. I’d been driving by one day and saw her getting onto the bus. The next day, I asked her if she wanted a ride. She accepted and that began our relationship—it was respectful, mind you. I wasn’t about to disrespect the woman I loved by getting intimate. Every day for a year, I’d pick her up from her bus stop—far enough away that her parents didn’t see—and I’d take her to and from school. That whole year, we did nothing but talk and grow our friendship. The day she turned eighteen, I picked her up and I gave her a necklace that belonged to my grandmother. I told her how I felt, and we kissed for the first time. That kiss, it was something else. I can still feel it lingering on my lips.”
I sit, sipping my whiskey and listening to his story.
“We kept our relationship a secret. I mean, what parent would let their eighteen-year-old daughter see a man in his twenties?” He reaches out, picking up the bottle and pouring another drink. “As you can imagine, her parents ended up finding out eventually.”
“What happened?”
“They didn’t approve, but she chose me. We got married and she became pregnant with Brennan almost immediately. Her parents all but disowned her. Truth be told, I was happy to have her with me, but I hated myself for ruining their relationship.”
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