“Gorgeous,” she said as she stood at the front fender of the Honda, her backpack on her shoulder. On his feet next to her, Adam nodded.
They explored the interior. Two bedrooms, two baths, and an adequately sized, modernly equipped, clean kitchen.
“This place is awesome,” she commented after completing a quick tour with him.
“It is pretty nice,” he admitted. “Not a peep from anyone up here.”
Isolated, sure. But so … serene. She could see herself holing up in this nature’s beauty and working on a Landy book, using a camera on hikes and painting the scenes later. Why was he so iffy about his newly acquired property? If she didn’t have ties in California, this cabin would be ideal for her introverted lifestyle.
“Do you mind if I get a little work in?” she asked after they settled with a couple water bottles on the front porch, watching Ink explore in the grass out front.
“Of course not.”
“I promised Clare I’d call. And I need to check out a couple emails from the agent about this UK release. And it’d be nice to send back that tat I sketched this morning.”
Adam stood, his smiling expression seeming forced, and she couldn’t read him long enough to understand why he’d be upset. “You don’t need to explain. I’ll run into town. Grab some dinner. I saw a car lot when we first drove in. Maybe I can find a rental to check out.”
Rental? He wasn’t staying here? Sammy blinked, confused. How couldn’t he be content here?
But he’d tire of it, like anything else, it seemed. No settling.
“Okay. I won’t be long,” she said.
He kissed her gently, then fiercely before he left, with just enough heat to have her panting before she headed inside. Cozy on the bed in the smaller bedroom, Sammy ticked through her to-do list as quickly as possible, not wanting to miss a chance, no matter how short, to spend her night with Adam.
Checking in with Clare lifted her spirits, yet it was a sturdy reminder of why she was meeting with Edgar the next day. Contracts and permission notices warranted a decent skim. And taking a photo of her latest tattoo design in her sketchbook and emailing the attachment to California required seconds of her concentration.
Her laptop lingered shutting down, and Sammy sat up, turned off the Wi-Fi hotspot on her phone, cracked the kinks from her neck, and eyed the darkness through the window. Adam had to be back, she guessed. Town was only a few minutes’ drive down the mountainside.
“Anyone home?” she called out as she left the bedroom, searching for Adam and listening for any noises.
Where is he hiding?
The kitchen was empty, the other bedroom vacant. Standing in the living space, she pursed her lips, setting her hands on her hips. Out the front window, she saw the Honda’s hood reflecting a glimmer of light.
The car was back, so he had to be too. Narrowing her vision, she checked the flicker of brightness shining off the clear case over the headlight. Did he start a fire?
She walked outside, pausing mid-step as she descended from the porch.
In a spacious clearing to the north of the cabin, Adam had set up dinner. On the flannel blanket from her trunk, he’d arranged containers of food, a bucket of ice with a bottle slanted inside it. Two plates were laid out, waiting for them.
What stole her breath, though, were the pillows stacked in a corner of the blanket, the dozens of candles flickering. Some squat tea lights in candle bowls, a few towering stick candles stabbed into table-top holders atop a couple trays.
Adam was crouching, rearranging a candle around its neighbor, maybe fussing over some specific placement he had in mind. He glanced in her direction, did a double take, and stood, dusting off his jeans.
He walked toward her, stopped, bent back to the blanket to pick up something, and then resumed meeting her halfway.
If Sammy were a gambling woman, she would have put her bottom dollar on Adam being nervous. Of all things, nervous! In the manner of a teen picking up his prom date, he held out his arm, presenting her a small but beautiful bouquet of lilies.
“For you,” he said, nearly a whisper.
He’d slowly stolen her heart since the first time he grinned at her years ago in her family’s mansion in Concord. In his absence during his military time, her adoration for him simmered and soldiered on despite the distance and the low chances of ever seeing him again. Now, with this unexpected show of classic romance, he’d sealed her fate—he locked her heart away for her to never retrieve it.
“Thank you,” she said, taking the flowers.
His smile was gentlemanly, polite, maybe with a hint of pride for his gallant show of wooing her. “Hungry? I got—”
She gripped the front of his shirt, yanking him close for a kiss, a firmer show of gratitude for him taking the unnecessary and sweet step to treat her like a lady, a queen with a midsummer’s night feast.
His lips curved in a smile under hers and his arms wrapped around her, securing her in a hug as he took over their kiss.
Slowly parting from him, she took in the shadows of his face, the darkness cast by the flickering candles. She cleared her throat, coaching herself not to throw herself at him.
“Like it?” he asked.
“Love it.” And you.
“I just hope we don’t burn down the forest or something,” he said, scratching at his chin.
She smirked at him, knowing he considered conservation a serious matter. “Hardy-har. You mentioned food, mister?”
Relaxed on the blanket, they ate the variety of takeout Adam scored from the deli, both of them laughing at Ink’s begs for scraps. Finished with food, they lay back on the blanket, watching the stars come out above.
Bliss. There was no other description.
On her side, Adam’s firm arm as her pillow, she drew circles and spirals above his steady heartbeat.
“I figured you’d be on edge tonight. Wanted to treat you,” he said, breaking the silence that surrounded them.
She was on edge, but thanks to his pampering with the candlelit outdoor dinner, flowers, soft kisses, and the natural humor and wit they always shared with each other, nightmares and fears had been shoved to a recess in her mind.
But she was high-strung for an entirely different and potentially weightier reason.
“Don’t stop,” she teased, leaning closer to kiss him. She rode the momentum of her anxiety, needing him in a now-or-never sentiment.
It was her only conscious move, her only expression of her intent, but somehow, she knew Adam comprehended the depth of her desire.
To make the final leap, that last stepping stone of leaving girlhood behind to truly become a woman, in the most physical of ways.
Giddy, nervous, but confident, Sammy found slight humor in the coincidence that Adam would be the one she’d lose her virginity to after all, just like she’d always hoped.
Kisses grew deeper and gasps more pronounced as she crawled on top of him, not close enough. She still hosted doubts, mainly because she wasn’t versed in the, well, procedure of properly having sex, but as Adam groaned beneath her, wrenching her tighter against his wall of a chest and the unmistakable hardness in his jeans, she trusted he would guide her any time she faltered.
Too hot and too eager to feel his skin against hers, she sat up, straddling him, and pulled off her shirt. Before returning to his lips, she tugged his shirt up, snagging it on his chin, pushing them both to laughter. Humor faded as she took off her bra. His rough hands barely held her breasts as he massaged and teased.
She cupped his jaw as she lowered to him, sinking in the promise of his kiss. As they became tangled, their limbs snaking around each other in a passionate wrestle, Sammy couldn’t tell if it she was pushing her hips against his erection, or if he was grinding against her. Regardless, it wasn’t enough. Even in her lack of experience, she knew she needed more.
Adam rolled her onto her back, covering her. She slid her hands down his chest, aiming for his pants. Lifting up, he gave her the
space she needed to undo his jeans, and she encouraged him to lose them and his boxers, her fingers pulling at both bands. Shimmying off his clothes, she immediately gripped his cock. He sucked in a harsh breath.
“Easy, baby, easy,” he whispered, covering her again, kissing and sucking at her neck.
“Not really,” she said between breaths. “This is very, very difficult.”
He reared back, his brows slanted. “Tell me to stop, and I stop.”
She groaned, popping the button to her shorts. “Difficult because you’re too slow.”
Do I really sound that whiny? That desperate?
His lips softened to his damning almost-grin. “Patience, Sammy, patience.” He kissed her, licking at her lips, and assisted with the rest of her garments.
“I’ve already waited years for you,” she said.
Uneducated, she chose to do what prompted the dirtiest curses from his mouth, the lowest groans from his throat. She stroked him, reveling in the silkiness of his skin, intent on pleasing him however she could.
Once he slid his finger into her, she fumbled, slowing her hands on his cock as she let herself grow accustomed and addicted to his pumping digit. Tension stretched and pulsed inside her, like a combustion that would shatter and relieve the pressure tantalizing her. Even stronger than the urge to explode as she had with his tongue on her, she was frantic to come.
“Please, Adam … please.” She gripped his dick tighter to show him what she wanted.
Afraid he was retreating, unwilling to go further with her, she waited as he reached to his side, into his jeans’ pocket. Foil ripped and she realized he was only using his head, the one up north, not his swollen one, and thinking about protection, sheathing himself in a condom.
She knew he was aware of her virginity and that she took the pill each night. Still, the fact he had the presence of mind not to risk of an “oops” floored her. Heat of the moment aside, Adam really would always take care of her.
He slowly entered her, his arms shaking with tremors as he kept the bulk of his bodyweight off of her. Pain spiked briefly as she acclimated to his girth, a foreign intrusion but a sought-after breach. As quickly as she’d winced at his first slow push, she sighed, waiting for more.
He thrust forward again, unhurried, kissing her closed eyes, her cheeks, the tip of her nose, as he entered her fully. Seated in her, he paused, his solid, toned body still over hers, and she arched her back, not willing to delay any longer.
“More,” she whispered.
“You’ll be the death of me.” He kissed her lazily. “So fucking tight.”
“More,” she repeated, dragging her nails on his back.
“I don’t want to hurt you. Trust me. I’ll make this good for you, baby.”
Good? He’d already soared past excellent.
He increased the speed and force of his thrusts as she held onto him, craving more, wanting all he had to offer. Anchoring her legs around his waist, her arms looped around his neck, she clung to him as he brought her to a scream, her release electrifying her to a trembling puddle of heaven. A couple more steady movements into her, and he came, grunting and collapsing on top of her, cuddling her even harder in his grip as she felt goose bumps erupt on his shoulder blades.
Staying as one, he twisted, rolling them so he lay on his back and she was draped on top.
Her heart pounded, recovering, almost as though it were ricocheting the thunder of his heart under hers. Huffing out deep breaths, Adam grew lax on the ground, not letting go of her, running his hand up and down her bare skin, from the back of her neck all the way to the seat of her ass. Long, warm swipes of comfort, soothing her from the frenzied pace of making love for the first time.
“You okay?” he asked after some time.
Always thinking of her. Putting her first. She kissed his collarbone and raised her head to face him.
“Oh, my God.” She moaned, closing her eyes with a grimace and slamming her face back to his musky, sweaty chest.
He stiffened under her and she jerked up, eyeing him again before frowning at the source of her alarm past him. “She was—” She nodded to the left of them, behind his head.
Ink lay there, eyeing them carefully, too intently for Sammy’s liking.
“She was watching the whole time!”
Adam’s laughter bounced her on his chest, raising them together. “She won’t judge us.”
Shifting to his side, he slid out of her. She winced with a hiss, and he scowled. “Sit tight. Do not move, okay?” He stood in all his masculine perfection, and got rid of the condom. After he disappeared, Sammy grew sleepy in the aftermath, barely counting the stars above.
He returned with a wet washcloth in his hand, and before she could sit up and take it from him, he kneeled down and wiped her thighs.
Finished tidying her up, he held out his hands to assist her to stand. Naked in the dying firelight, she faced him.
“Hey,” Adam said, ducking lower to see her eye to eye. “How about we go streaking?”
She rolled her eyes after he waggled his eyebrows like a doofus. “I can hardly walk straight, let alone run around anywhere.”
“Say no more.” One swift sweep of his arms, and he was carrying her inside. He let her stand at the foot of the bed in the room he’d put his backpack in, his hand lingering on her skin, caressing her butt and thigh as she wobbled on her feet.
“Let me go clean up and I’ll meet you there.” He pointed to the bed.
For sleep? Or round two? Eyeing his sated but still impressive dick, she didn’t wonder why she was so sore. Either would work.
“I’ll be waiting.”
“Hmm,” he murmured, leaving the room.
Forgoing clothes, she climbed into the bed, groaning at the soft cushion of the crisp sheets and mattress. Though she looked forward to Adam joining her, for more lovemaking or even just cuddling, she struggled to stay awake.
He slid under the sheet, warming her back as he spooned her, his rough skin and firm muscles skin to skin with her pliant body.
“Thank you,” Sammy said.
“What for?”
She notched her shoulder. “For being you. For showing me…” She couldn’t put it in words, their night too profound to label and confine to a simple description.
He kissed her hair.
“Did you find a rental car?”
“They were closed.” He tugged her back to his chest even tighter, his arm over her side and his hand cupping her breast.
“You’re really not sticking around here?”
“What would I do?”
“You really are a drifter.”
“Who would I share this with, if not you?”
She opened her eyes to the dark room. Was that an invitation?
“Well, I was hoping to come back here. After I settle my no-nonsense business transaction with he who shall not be named.”
He laughed lightly, a balm to her soul. At least she could still rile a smile from him. “Tomorrow?”
She nodded, rubbing his arm. “It can’t take me too long to meet with him. I’ll say hi to Jake, and come rushing back to these arms.”
He pressed his lips to her shoulder.
“You’ll be here?”
He nuzzled into her hair. “I can’t do anything in one day. I think I might sell it.”
She frowned, turning to face him. “But this is such a … perfect place.”
“For what?”
Me. You. Us.
“For a vacation? Sure. I bet I can find a decent buyer. I’ll ask around in town tomorrow while I wait for you to come back to say goodbye.”
She smoothed the stubble on his jaw. “Do you think you’ll ever find what you’re looking for, Adam?”
“Maybe I already have.” He kissed her gently. “All I have to do is have the guts to go after … it.”
“Well, let’s not call you a hypocrite. You told me to never let my fears hold me back.”
He rested his forehead on
hers. “Great advice, right? But still easier said than done.”
“What are you so afraid of?”
“My parents were the definition of incompatibility. They never should have gotten together with such different mindsets and personal goals. He drove her crazy always uprooting us. She made him insane with her homebody attitude. When I was younger, I didn’t see it. But once I realized how miserable they made each other, I’ve convinced myself I couldn’t do that, to myself or someone else.”
“You’re not your parents.”
“But I can only be me. That’s the deal I’ll never be able to close. A bad match. What if what I want isn’t right for me? Or me for her—it? What if it just doesn’t work out?”
Sammy sighed. “Easy. You don’t know. But why should you let the possibility of something not succeeding stop you from finding out if it can work out?”
“Not like painting over a canvas, Sammy.”
“No, and it shouldn’t be. If all the hard things in life were so simple to figure out, what would be the point of living? Challenges shape us. Look at me. I was modified by my early college days, not ruined. If I were still in that dorm room, with Reese holding off my starvation, yeah, life would have gotten the better of me. But I persevered. I didn’t know what, if anything, I could find in another city, another place, but I had to search. For so long, I was trapped in the ‘truth’ that all men would hurt me like that frat boy had, or toss me aside like my father and Edgar had, but as you’ve proven, that’s not true. I only had to open my eyes and let myself see what could be.”
When he didn’t answer, closing his eyes instead, she kissed his cheek, wishing him sweet dreams and the power to chase them.
Chapter Eighteen
Sammy cringed as she scooted around a chair in the kitchen, its legs scraping on the tiled floor. She put a finger to her lips, telling Ink she knew she needed to be quiet.
Always Was Page 17
