A Country Christmas

by Lilliana Rose

“And you can’t come?” Her eyes pleaded for him to change his mind.

  “Sorry. I do need to be home. I have cattle to send away to market, and it can’t wait.”

  Zoe sighed. This was what it was like being on the farm. Max wasn’t always able to be by her side. She didn’t mind since she was independent, but for this, she reckoned she could do with his support.

  It will be fine, Zoe kept telling herself. It will be fine.

  If only she believed it.

  Wednesday 4th December

  Max lifted Zoe’s overnight bag from the bed. “What the hell have you got in here? I thought most of your clothes didn’t fit anymore.”

  “It’s not that heavy.” She rolled her eyes at him.

  “I swear it is.” He placed it on the floor for a moment, and scooped her into his arms. “I’m going to miss you tonight.”

  “Then come.” Zoe’s eyes pleaded with him to change his mind.

  “I’m sorry, I can’t.”

  The truck was coming later that morning to pick up the herd of cattle. Then he had organized his mate, Jim from Burra, to come and install a dish on the roof to help with the internet connection. An early Christmas gift for Zoe. He wanted her to be comfortable, he wanted her to stay, and for all of them to be a family together. It was difficult, because they were still trying to get to know each other. Then the pressure of Christmas, of each other’s family wanting to meet, was simply the way it was. They hadn’t been careful in the heated moment, and they were both wearing the consequence. For him, this had made him a happy man.

  “No?”

  He shook his head. It was hard not to blurt out why he was really staying, and to tell her what he was trying to do for her.

  “Ring me, any time,” he said. “I’m sure our families will get along. Hell, we do, right?”

  She put on a brave smile. “Sure.”

  He sighed. “I look forward to seeing you tomorrow. You and the baby are the best thing in my life.” He kissed her slowly, her lips moved with his in a longing that they couldn’t address right now.

  Beep. Beep. Beep.

  A car horn sounded outside.

  Max pulled away, took his hand in hers. “They’re here. Let’s not keep them waiting.”

  “I just need to go to the bathroom once more.”

  “I’ll take your bag to the car then.”

  “Thanks.” She went ahead, while he picked up her bag.

  It wasn’t really that heavy, he’d been hoping to make her laugh, but she was way too worked up about this trip.

  Maybe I should go with her?

  He pushed on the screen door, slipped on his boots, and then walked out to the car, the bag slung easily over his shoulder. “You ladies ready for some shopping?”

  “Absolutely,” answered Kate.

  “Mornin’ Max,” called out his mom from the front passenger’s seat, waving casually at him as she paused from her knitting.

  Kate got out from the driver’s seat and opened the boot of the car. Max noticed there was already a reasonable amount of luggage packed in there for an overnight stay.

  He raised his eyebrow. “You reckon you’ll have enough room for what you want to buy?”

  “Of course,” Kate huffed.

  “Don’t you be cheeky now,” called out his mom. “You know you should be coming, too.”

  The tone in his mom’s voice caused guilt to cut through his gut.

  He should be.

  But.

  There were more important reasons not to.

  “Zoe understands,” he said slamming closed the boot of the vehicle.

  Well, she will be when she sees my surprise for her. Bloody hell, he hoped he could pull it off. Otherwise, he was running being in the doghouse in regard to her, and by the looks of it his mom as well.

  Zoe came out from the house, the back-door slamming behind her. The wind caught the navy-blue maxi dress she wore, pushing the material over the bump low in her belly.

  He smiled. She looked radiant. Hot. Bloody sexy.

  She’d taken time to straighten her hair, and it was styled neatly below her shoulders. For a moment, he thought about canceling what he’d planned for the day to make sure he joined her. It would be fun having a hotel room to themselves. With her ranging hormones adding to the sparks that were already there between them they could have a whole load of adult fun together. But it wasn’t possible. He’d already decided he needed to think more long term, for her and for them, and their soon to be born baby.

  Max quickly opened the car door for her. “My lady.” He winked at her, relieved she smiled back at him. She was undoubtedly putting on a brave face considering how nervous she was when they were in the bedroom packing.

  Zoe slid into the SVU, put on her seat belt. He leaned and kissed her goodbye once more. Her salty taste bursting in his mouth in a delight that he hoped would tie him over until tomorrow. She hadn’t been on the farm barely a month, and it surprised him how much he didn’t want her to leave. It kept his resolve to do whatever he could to make this work between them.

  “Don’t get up to any mischief, ladies.” He closed the door, enjoying that all three of them were grinning at him.

  “Course not,” said Zoe. “I am preggers after all.”

  “Well, since you’re not coming, we can do what we want,” said Kate as she got back into the driver’s seat and started the car.

  “Take care.” He waved goodbye, watching the vehicle slowly drive away.

  This was going to be a long day and night ahead without her.

  Without meaning to, Zoe had fallen asleep in the car for most of the trip to Adelaide. The motion of the vehicle rocking her off to sleep. She woke as Kate slowed at the first set of traffic lights coming into Adelaide on the Port Wakefield highway.

  “You should’ve woken me,” she mumbled sitting up and stretching her neck, her muscles stiff from the odd position she’d been sleeping in.

  “You need as much rest as you can get,” Helen said her knitting needles clicking at a fast pace.

  Zoe noticed the fine white yarn she was using. “Are you making something for the baby?”

  “A little matinee jacket. It will be winter by the time the baby’s born, and it can get cold up at Burra.”

  It was hard to imagine it being cold, the summer days were hot and sunny.

  “It does, especially at night,” added Kate. She slowed down at another set of traffic lights. “I hate city driving.”

  “I can drive if you like,” offered Zoe.

  “I’ll be right.”

  Zoe bit her tongue. She knew they were trying to be helpful, to let her rest, but it wasn’t as if she was sick or not capable. “How about I drive out of the city on the way home, it’s easy for me.”

  “You’re not used to driving such a big car.”

  Her little car was much smaller than Helen’s SVU, but she’d driven the ute a little, and she really did feel that she could adapt easily. “Well, the offer’s there. I can drive in the city.”

  “Kind offer,” piped up Helen, as she finished a row, turned the growing length of knitted stitches, and started a new one. “Kate doesn’t even let me drive.” Helen glanced back at Zoe and rolled her eyes.

  “I saw that,” said Kate, her voice thick with tension. “I saved hard to buy this car.”

  “You did, and I’m proud of you. Zoe and I would drive it with due care.”

  Kate ignored them, swearing under her breath as a car cut in front of her. “I’m trying to drive carefully, you know. We do have a pregnant woman on board.”

  Zoe leaned back, there was no point arguing over this one. It wasn’t her car, and it was obvious that Kate was rather attached to it. She understood, it took her a while to save for her own car, but then she’d been on a high salary with her job as a legal secretary. That income was something she did miss, though with no shops at Burra, except for a coffee, gift store and a second-hand shop, the temptation to spend wasn’t there like it was when l
iving in the city.

  “You’re doing a fine job,” encouraged Helen.

  “You are,” added Zoe, realizing that she wasn’t the only one on edge.

  Zoe looked out, watching the landscape become more populated with houses, and apartment blocks. The traffic became busier. It surprised her how much the noise assaulted her senses. The sound from the vehicles on the road—cars, a few trucks, vans—caused her to feel more closed in, more claustrophobic without being able to see the wide-open spaces that had been her home for the last few weeks. Not being confined to an office for over eight hours a day was also something she didn’t miss. Part of her couldn’t wait to get back to the farm and feel the freedom of the space. And to see Max, of course.

  “I think we might be a little late for lunch,” said Kate. “There’s too much traffic.”

  Zoe didn’t think there were more cars on the road than normal. “I’ll text Mom, to say we will be a little late. She won’t mind.”

  “Thanks,” said Kate.

  Already things weren’t going to plan. Zoe wished she’d used the excuse of being pregnant to have stayed at home. Her belly roiled, and she rubbed it, as she got out her phone from her small handbag. But then as much as Max might like it, she couldn’t walk around the house naked, she needed maternity clothes.

  Based on her knowledge of the streets of Adelaide, Zoe texted her mom saying they were going to be about half an hour late.

  That should give us plenty of time to check-in to the Stamford Grand Hotel, freshen up and get ready for lunch.

  The arrangement was to meet in the restaurant of the hotel, which Zoe was relieved, as it took the pressure off now that they were going to be late. Her cell vibrated, and she glanced down to see a message from her mom, who was fine that lunch was going to be delayed. They were already at the restaurant, but were happy to wait.

  Zoe guessed her parents might be as nervous as she was to be meeting Max’s immediate family. Even though they were obviously over the moon to be able to have lunch with Helen and Kate, and a little disappointed that Max wasn’t coming. She wasn’t sure why the cattle needed to be sold right now, but since she didn’t know enough about farming, she hadn’t argue the point.

  It felt like she was under the microscope, that both sides of the family were watching her closely to see if things would work out between Max and her.

  Did he feel this pressure too? She figured he may well, based on his comment when she was sick on Monday.

  Should I talk to him about this? She sort of didn’t want to. With his sharp retorts, and cheeky deflections, she wasn’t sure a deep and meaningful conversation was the way to go with him. It was more like a heated argument was more his style. And hers. Since their relationship was built on a lustful attraction, she didn’t feel comfortable talking about her feelings with him.

  I’ll have to be, she thought.

  Her determination wavering.

  Though trusting her feelings when pregnant was something she wasn’t so sure was a good idea. This really wasn’t the ideal situation to start a relationship.

  Yet, here she was. Trying.

  First, I need to get through lunch and a shopping trip.

  This was one shopping trip she wasn’t at all looking forward to.

  Max crossed his fingers as he watched the semi-trailer take his cattle away from sale. They would be sold tomorrow. He was banking on a good price, so he could provide for Zoe and their baby. It was always at this point when doubt would slice away at him, and he would begin to question if he should’ve waited until the new year. But then if he had, it would be much closer to when the baby was born, and he wanted Zoe to have the chance to do her own styling to not just the baby’s room, but also to the house. It now was her home too.

  No point thinking about it now.

  Max kicked the stones on the ground, sending them flinging in all directions. He made his way back to his ute. Bluey sat on the back, panting from the workout of loading the cattle.

  “Reckon she’ll like what I have planned?” He patted Bluey behind his ear. The dog leaned in harder to his palm, enjoying the scratch. Max wished he was like Bluey without a care in the world.

  Maybe I should’ve talked this over with her.

  It wasn’t his style. He’d been alone for so long now. Zoe had turned his life upside down, and not just with the news of being pregnant. He wanted to do right by them both. This was the only way he knew how, by giving her a gift of money so she could do some renovations and feel at home.

  Would this be what she wanted? He shrugged, as he got into the ute. He didn’t really know. They had been doing what new couples did early in a relationship, sex and lots of it.

  He started the engine, then drove back the short distance to the house, where Jim was working on the roof to attach the satellite dish. Max figured the boosted internet might help Zoe connect with her city life, and not feel so isolated. It was different for him, life in the country, on a farm, was all he knew. He was sure about one thing though, he couldn’t move to the city. For his family, he’d give it a go, but that lifestyle wasn’t for him. It was bad enough each year when he went to the Royal Show in Adelaide. He was a country boy through and through.

  He slowed as he approached the old homestead.

  “Nearly finished?” he called out from the open window of his ute at Jim, who was on the roof.

  Jim nodded and gave him the thumbs up.

  At least he should have two surprises ready for Zoe when she came home. He wanted her to like them, and realize that’s the real reason he stayed behind. Small sacrifices for a bigger picture. He hoped his plan would please her.

  “Look how much you’ve changed already,” exclaimed her mom. Zoe walked into the restaurant area at the Stamford Grand Hotel. They had finally arrived, and Zoe had gone straight to see her parents, leaving Kate and Helen to check-in. They assured her it would be fine.

  “Mom.” Emotion rose up inside of her and her eyes filled with tears as she embraced her mom. She’d missed her. Her dad stood from the table and came over. She let go of her mom to hug her dad.

  “Dad, how are you?”

  “How’s my favorite daughter.” He hugged her tightly, then sat back down at the table by the window which gave a view of Glenelg beach.

  Zoe grinned, she was their only child, and her dad’s comment was an ongoing joke he had with her.

  Her mom patted her belly. “How’s my little grandie going?”

  “Mom.” She pushed her mom’s hand away, and grinned. It was good to be with her parents again. Another wave of emotion washed over her. Zoe dabbed the corner of her eye with her finger.

  “Oh, darling, it’s just the hormones. Being pregnant does that.” Her mom hugged her again.

  “Does it?” Zoe couldn’t resist the sarcasm.

  “It’s not for much longer.” Her mom handed her a handkerchief.

  “It will be the longest six months of my life, I just know it.” Zoe pressed the material at the corners of her eyes, hoping she hadn’t smudged her makeup. It felt like ages since she’d taken the time to style her hair and to put on makeup. It was too easy to be casual on the farm, and Max certainly wasn’t complaining about her natural style.

  Leanne smiled sympathetically at her daughter. “Enjoy it. It’s a special time.”

  Zoe nodded, not trusting herself to talk without managing to cry. Is this what was ahead of her for the next six months? If so, she was going to be glad to hide away on the farm.

  “Here, take a seat, and tell me what’s been going on.” Her mom pulled out the chair at the head of the table for Zoe to sit, then sat to her left, next to her dad, leaving the other side free for Kate and Helen once they’d checked in.

  “Not a lot has been happening.” Her makeup more than likely smudged, she was wearing a dress that was something she would consider casual, and definitely not upmarket enough for here at this restaurant, Zoe felt uncomfortable and out of place. It was amusing at first that her jeans no
longer fitted, but now, the realization of what that meant, and how her body was changing was a little scary.

  “What you need is a hobby,” said Leanne. “Something that isn’t on your computer.”

  “I don’t need a hobby, Mom,” answered Zoe, unsure why on earth her mom would suggest something like that. She’d always been a workaholic, and never had time for hobbies. There were the occasional times she spent going to the gym, burning off the frustration of a day’s work in the legal world, but there was no gym on the farm, or in Burra come to think of it. While some women went off to the gym when pregnant, she wasn’t one of them.

  “It will help to keep your mind occupied.”

  “I think my mind’s occupied enough,” she mused. There was the getting used to living with Max, being pregnant, getting to know his family and adjusting to farm life. There was more than enough to keep her thinking. Then there was the occasional work she was doing remotely for the firm she used to work for, and the worry of how long that would last.

  “My point exactly. You’re dealing with so much… a hobby will help take your mind off of it all.”

  Zoe wasn’t sure she needed anything else to consider in her life right now.

  “Think about it, Zoe. You don’t have to.” Her mom picked up the bottle of water on the table and poured Zoe a glass. “It’s just a suggestion.”

  Zoe knew damn well her mother never made a ‘suggestion.’ It was more like, this is what you should do, and I’ll keep on about it until you do.

  “I just can’t imagine myself making a quilt, Mom. Can you?” Zoe was rather pleased with her response. That should shut her up.

  “No, I can’t either. So, maybe don’t try that as a hobby right.” Her mom’s eyebrows arched, and Zoe felt herself squirming as if she hadn’t really shut her mom up at all.

  Will I do this to my child? She decided she definitely wasn’t going to do the ‘guilt trip’ on them, no matter what.

  “Now, why isn’t that man of yours down here with you?” asked her dad. He filled the glasses on the table with water and looked up for an answer.

  “Like I said, he’s busy with cattle. Had to get it done before Christmas.” She wished he was here with her. But then a ripple of something went through her and her tears dried, and she felt a renewed strength take hold. This was more like her. Strong. Independent. Fearless.