by Ryan Rimmel
Julia facepalmed. “Look, I’m going to take your badger and run over to the teleportation circle. You catch that thing and bring it over,” she said, grabbing Badgelor. The little traitor nuzzled in her boobs, as she carried him away.
“Shart, can we bond yet?” I asked, trying to gauge where the Thingamabob was going to land. I started walking toward the ruined Dungeon Core room.
“Noooo,” hissed the demon miserably. “All of my organs are on the outside. I can’t figure out how to use any of them to connect to anything.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll eventually figure it out,” I said, picking up speed. I had plotted where the Thingamabob was going to land. It was distressingly close to a glowing ball of energy, where the Dungeon Core used to reside. “Can a Dungeon Core get Damaged?”
“Of course, they have Durability. It would take a massive amount of Damage, though” stated Shart. He groaned again. “Like, about three boulders being fired into it at a high rate of speed.”
“What happens to a Damaged Dungeon Core?” I continued.
“They explode, about a few dumb Earth miles range, lots of damage,” groaned Shart.
“No worries,” I said, hopping into the ruined room and finding the cracked Dungeon Core. It was laying on its side at the far end of the room. I gingerly picked it up and looked at it with my Heightened Senses. That spell was particularly handy for spotting Thingamabobs and Dungeon Cores. “I’ll just start absorbing its power now.”
“Wait, that’s probably a bad idea,” started Shart, but I didn’t have time to wait around. I found the Core’s points that functioned like a magical font and began draining it.
● Your Max Level is increase to 65.3
“Why does everything taste purple?” I asked, stumbling backward.
“You idiot! You blew a fuse on your Mana network. You can’t absorb that much power without consequences,” said Shart. “Then again, not your worst idea. That Core was about to explode. You just bought yourself a minute or two.”
Shaking my head until both my eyes refocused, I realized all my spells had stopped. Without Heightened Senses, I couldn’t see the fast-moving Thingamabob. I activated Perception, but it was hard to track any single object with so much other debris around.
The thing I hadn’t mentioned to Julia was that the Thingamabob would explode on impact. I struggled back to my feet, searching the sky for the object. I was too late. I spotted it incoming, and, even with my Flash Steps perk, I was going to come up short. I had to try, though, so I dashed over. I might have made it, had I not bounced off an unlikely object.
Twinkle stumbled forward, ending in a roll. When he came back to his feet, he was holding the Thingamabob. “Did you need this, buddy?”
“Yes, pal,” I replied carefully. Twinkle walked over and dropped the Thingamabob directly into my palm.
“I assume your escape plan is better laid out than mine,” stated Twinkle, looking around.
“What do you mean?” I asked, still eyeing the Dungeon Core. Crackling noises were coming from it, and I thought I could see thin, grey smoke wisps.
“Well, there is a path to the Fast Lanes at the base of those stairs,” Twinkle said. He gestured toward a recently exposed stairwell. “However, several boulders smashed through the ceiling and killed the dungeon boss.”
“Which was a good thing?” I asked.
“No, the boulder that killed the beast bounced into the Fast Lanes. That means the Walker of Siers knows about the entrance,” stated Twinkle.
“Why is that bad?” I asked.
“The Walker of Siers rules the dimension the Fast Lanes are located in. The Walker is an unimaginably powerful eldritch horror that loves to feast on creatures from Ordinal. My people can still make limited use of the Fast Lanes, due to some magical potions we possess. Those concoctions won’t work, though, if there is fresh meat by the entrance.”
“Are you saying you need to escape with me?” I asked.
“Yes, buddy,” stated the elf.
I kicked the sparking Dungeon Core down the staircase that led directly into the Fast Lanes. “Works for me. Let's book it.”
The elf’s shoulders sagged in relief. “I was afraid I was quite boned. If the boulders hadn’t stopped flying everywhere, I knew I was doomed.”
“Shart, why did the boulders stop?” I asked, suddenly concerned.
“I don’t think your storage ran out, if that’s what you mean,” stated the demon, checking something over our link. “Oh, it’s because your Mana network isn’t operating. Everything is getting queued up. When the network restores in seventy-three seconds, everything is going to blast out, all at once.”
“How long does it take to cast a Teleportation spell?” I asked.
“About thirty seconds. Why?” asked the demon.
I already had Shart under one arm. I grabbed Twinkle under the other and rushed toward the teleportation circle. Twinkle slid free but kept running with me.
“I’m flattered but consent, Jim,” he said, correcting his hair. “Always get consent.”
“Life or death, limited timeframe, sorry,” I replied. Without the massive stones flying everywhere, the rest of our run was a breeze.
Julia watched us approach, sticking out her hand. “Give it to me! I can begin the spell before the boulders start again.”
“I know when they are going to start. We need to teleport at the exact moment after they do,” I replied, dropping the object into her hand. “Be careful with this. It explodes on impact.” Twinkle paled.
“How much time?” Julia asked.
“About forty-three seconds,” I replied.
She nodded. Julia then moved very close, pressing her body against me. I could feel every curve, as she placed her hand in mine. The Thingamabob rested between our palms. “The closer we are, the better the spell will work.”
I felt the elf latch onto my other side. He pressed even tighter.
“What about consent?” I asked.
“Life or death,” he smiled back at me.
I was still holding Shart. Cute little Badgelor crawled onto my shoulder and squeezed his face into my neck. We all waited impatiently. At the thirty-one second mark, Julia began chanting the spell. If she made the slightest mistake, we were all dead. The princess was careful and quick to perfectly recite the incantation.
I started to feel a shifting in my gut. Suddenly, the space around me filled with everything else from my storage. I watched as every single thing, from the Phylactery that I’d gotten in the dungeon to my several hundred healroot, zipped off into the distance. They were surrounded by a crazy assortment of broken coat racks and a cloud of boulders. From the corner of my eye, I saw Badgelor snatch something at the last second.
We vanished, just as the rain of destruction shattered the last bits of the temple. The whole building sagged and began to collapse.
Windfall Ho!
Chapter 57 - Windfall No
We appeared 100 feet in the air. That usually would have been troubling, but we were over water. Unlike on Earth, even a slight puddle was enough to stop you from falling to your death. Of course, what was below us was no small puddle.
A ship had been underneath us for the spell's opening instant, but it was cruising at a fast clip. Thankfully, we took several seconds to fully materialize. After three seconds to emerge and three seconds to fall, the ship was fifty logs past us. We all splashed haphazardly into the water. It didn’t help that it was dark, and there were clouds everywhere.
I sputtered out first, holding onto Shart and Julia. The Zealot shook off my hand and looked around, trying to figure out where we were. Twinkle and Badgelor both popped up a moment later.
“I thought we were going to appear in a town,” gasped Twinkle.
“I got the Thingamabob from a town,” I hissed. “Well, south of a town. Those Thingamabobs were made especially for me. The girl who crafted them happened to work for a ship.” I held up my fist and started screaming out, “Bub.”
A
bright white ray shot off into the sky. I kept yelling “Bub” and shooting out blasts, trying to get the ship’s attention.
“Jim,” stated Julia, as I continued blasting, doing whatever I could to attract the ship.
“Jim,” screamed Badgelor, his paws grabbing hold of my head and turning me around. Dozens of large fins were circling, attracted by my bright display.
“Feck me,” I groaned. The fins grew closer and closer. Just as suddenly as they appeared, they scattered.
“Are we saved?” asked Twinkle.
“In my experience, this sort of thing is never a good sign,” stated Badgelor dryly.
Julia gestured with her head. I instantly noticed something was wrong with the water. We seemed to be above an underwater spout or something. It was causing the water under us to surge up oddly. That’s when I noticed a massive eyeball.
“Well, that’s Ordinal for you,” I said, as the huge creature beneath us began to close in.
Quite abruptly, there was splashing around us on all sides. After that, nothing happened for a moment. Then, the water seemed to rumble. I looked up to see that the ship had returned. It was flying a flag that showed a familiar lizard. A very dark-skinned man with a massive grin stared down at me. His crew began tossing out ropes.
“Howarya?”
The End
Epilogue
Su-Kar’s feet gently touched a depression in the ground, as her Feather Fall spell finally expired. The spell hadn’t even taken her off the temple grounds, not that the temple would last much longer. She turned around to see the great building being torn apart from whatever battle Hardragon and O’Really were having. Not that she cared about that anymore.
Phillip must be dead. She needed a moment to process that. For so long, all she had wanted to do was leave that jerk dead in a ditch, just like the one she was currently standing in. Now that she had gotten what she once wished for the most, it hurt. All of their plans together were gone. Sure, most of them were about torturing O’Really, but, when she had actually bothered to talk to the oaf, she realized Phillip had possessed a keen mind for torture. Su-Kar had always discounted him because of his uncouth nature.
She regretted that now, and she’d never have a chance to tell him. Su-Kar jerked and looked up toward the temple again, as one final blast of boulders went flying off in all directions. She didn’t even see the Phylactery. It slammed into her chest and exploded out her back in a fiery fountain of gore.
***
Hardragon aimed, prayed, and hit, slamming into the creek at a speed that would have otherwise broken him. He landed in the water, though. It was enough to nullify all Falling Damage. The lich hadn’t been so lucky. It had landed on a rock and shattered.
That bastard had tricked him. Hardragon considered that for a long moment. Not O’Really said he had fought the Dark Overlord, and the boss was tending to someone that was grievously injured. Standing, Hardragon decided that he would have to go back to report his partial failure. He hadn’t gotten a good look at the demon for several minutes. However, when Hardragon was flying away, the Elder Demon was gone. Then, the temple collapsed. That must mean that the summoning had failed.
Didn’t it?
***
Lorraine stared at the ancient temple. It had been the bane of her family for generations. Countless wandering monsters had come from there. Everyone was forbidden entry, due to the high rate of fatalities for those adventurers that were stupid enough to enter.
Jim had destroyed it to save the princess.
Lorraine knew he was alive. She had brought his army to help, but the Great General had vanished. He may have disappeared, but the army interface was still active. The only way to destroy a Great General’s army was to kill the Great General.
“Do you have any idea where the Mayor went, Captain-General?” asked Nick.
“Of course, I do, Captain-General,” she replied, loving the title. The full title was Captain-General of the Army of Windfall, which was right out of Season 4, Episode 2. The little fangirl in her was still geeking out about that. “The Mayor went to Grebthar's Lands. We are off to Windfall!”
“But the Gatekeeper,” said Nick, shocked.
“The Gatekeeper will not deny the Army of Windfall entry into Grebthar's Lands. It has been foretold,” she said, “In Season 9, Episode 12!”
***
“I don’t think we are doing very much this time around,” stated SueLeeta, adjusting her long braid between her broad shoulder blades.
“No, but it's nice that they included us anyway.” replied Sir Dalton. “Besides, I have a feeling we are going to be much more involved soon!”
SueLeeta nodded, searching the field. Sir Dalton had taken command of a fifty-man unit, including five sergeants. That left SueLeeta free to deal with more serious concerns. Her ultimate victory was in sight. She pulled back an arrow, waiting patiently for that idiot to stick his head out from behind a tree. Patience was the key in any battle.
“So, my tent got destroyed,” she began. The last battle had been rough. Nearly a dozen adventurer casualties on each side in the last battle, along with hundreds of fallen soldiers.
“That is unfortunate,” stated Sir Dalton. He was waiting for a horn to sound.
“I’d hate to be at less than my best for these upcoming battles. It looks like the weather is going to be bad, as well,” she continued.
“Good point. You can have my tent,” stated Sir Dalton confidently.
SueLeeta sighed. “Then you won’t be at your best. Isn’t your tent fairly large? I bet we could share.”
“Of course, we could share. You are indeed clever,” stated Sir Dalton. “Just bring your bedding over to my tent. We can both be comfortable there.”
“They got my bedding, too,” SueLeeta deadpanned, her inner goddess dancing. Things were looking up.
***
TimSimons stared at the battlefield reports. Both his head and his heart hurt.
“This cannot be right! We have over one hundred adventurers dead,” King TimSimons said, staring at the names. Each one had been someone the king had known personally. Each name pained him.
“At least the casualties on the other side have been just as bad,” replied Force Captain Grayeir. “Unless you and HarCharles personally start clashing, we should be able to negotiate a ceasefire soon. This many dead adventurers are going to destabilize both our kingdoms.
“That would be one for the storybooks,” stated TimSimons. Kings never fought adventurers. That was the general rule. It was a rule that got bent quite a bit. The specific rule was that kings didn’t fight kings. The thought of two kingdom-tier weapons in actual combat was something that kept people like Grayeir up at night.
The simple fact was that no kingdom could lose this many adventurers and prosper. Typical wars would have stopped at a tenth of these deaths, yet the battles continued over the Riverlands. TimSimons was tempted to accept the request made by the Hunter from Windfall. If he ordered someone to heal their Warden, his army would gain a capable Woodsman.
Windfall’s mayor was missing. That didn’t bode well, either. TimSimons wasn’t a religious man, but he had received a Falconian education. He knew the mayor of Windfall was quite important to them. He had hoped this new mayor was a charlatan, but Lord Dookie had spoken highly of him before the ambush.
TimSimons made up his mind. He would talk to Sir Dalton and his companion, SueLeeta, concerning this mayor. That action would resolve one of his issues. It’s what Sheblin would have wanted him to do.
“My king, the storm cloud moves,” stated Grayeir. The captain was already slamming on his helmet. TimSimons couldn’t believe it. The Storm King approached!
“The sword and the hammer will again meet in battle,” said TimSimons, drawing Excalibur. Such an occurrence had not happened since Grebthar’s time.
From the Author
Thank you for reading Noobtown Book 5, Noob Game Plus. I hope you had as much fun reading it as I did writing
it. If you liked NG+, please take the time to review it. If you didn’t, then stay away from that ratings section! Haha, I kid, I kid. Seriously, you have no idea how much a rating can help an independent author like me.
Coming later in 2021: Noobtown Book 6! (Yes, I have already started writing it.) You can follow its progress on Noobtown’s Facebook page here. I’m very responsive and love to hear from my fans. Additionally, if you are so inspired to support me in any other way, please don’t hesitate to check out my Patreon page here. Thanks again for reading my writing! Hope to hear from you soon.
Please check out all of my Noobtown Books!
Mayor of Noobtown (Audio)
Village of Noobtown (Audio)
Castle of the Noobs (Audio)
Dungeons and Noobs (Audio)
